His comcast password was MrStupid1 afterall. He knows he's dumb as fuck but believes he's still a cut above every other retard when he really really isn't. If phil was actually intelligent he'd be dangerous. Give thanks that he's just another mong.
His comcast password was MrStupid1 afterall. He knows he's dumb as fuck but believes he's still a cut above every other retard when he really really isn't. If phil was actually intelligent he'd be dangerous. Give thanks that he's just another mong.
A couple of detractors have been picking up on how he treats his audience/Khet. He'll purposefully fuck something up in a way where telling him to do it properly feels like a waste of time. So with Khet, Phil was tasked with doing laundry and repeatedly kept overloading it and blaming the machine. Thus Khet became the one to do the laundry from then on.
Then you have his Stellar Blade event. He put on a disguise and made it clear he wasn't taking the game seriously and ignored the chat. By the end it was obvious how reticent he was to play the game.
Trying to get Phil to do anything will cause him to essentially throw a toddler tantrum and by the end you find yourself doing the task yourself or just going "fuck it". I think this laziness goes hand in hand with his stupidity. If he put as much effort into doing things right as he does in being a dumbass who gets people to do the job for him, he might come off as less stupid.
If you know an alcoholic, that throat clearing he does is all alcohol related. And he doesn't even smoke, just the deep gargle of phlegm to be cleared and swallowed. His throat is probably so irritated from alcohol consumption, which leads to him snorting.
Once he starts getting a yellowish hue, it's end game for a liver transplant. And I've seen someone die from jaundice from it, it ain't fun
Legit felt like Michael Bluth opening the "Dead Dove: Do Not Eat" package. Smark guys, and it’s just a sober Ralph talking about wrestling, an ugly layout on OBS, and Phil nodding along in silence.
I don't watch any wrestling....is this the way people talk about shows? DSP obviously doesn't think it's real, but he is treating everything like it is 100% serious. "this guy is too small to do this move, doesn't make sense" "Logan Paul has a metal plate in his arm...isn't that illegal? Doesn't make sense" etc.
I'm confused why do these guys accept to appear on this shitshow ? They are lolcow but what are they gaining out of this ? Dsp is even struggling to hit his goal himself .
I'm confused why do these guys accept to appear on this shitshow ? They are lolcow but what are they gaining out of this ? Dsp is even struggling to hit his goal himself .
Oh boyyy. Can't wait for another Jyamsper the Argonian spellsword playthrough spamming healing spells and buying up every last available health potion in every merchant. On Very Normal. With light armor, because heavy armor makes your healspam worse!
Realistically, we should be about to hit another DesperateSydePhil arc soon as his audience is dwindling to previously unthinkable numbers. Dude's a 100 viewer streamer now. With a dead chat. I've seen 30 people chats that are legit too fast to keep up with. Maybe 120 of those 150 dudes watching are bots. Granted he's been trying to make himself deliberately unwatchable for years, so maybe it's his endgame, but still. Between Dear Leader's nuking of this board way back then, the supposed resurgence, and Phil just insistently sticking to babby's first vidya AND playing it on Normal none the less.
I get that most of his current game choices are just "Is it easy and can I sleepwalk through this?" But you can see the decline in real time. Pigga's not even able to handle Minecraft any more. Picking easy games to stream when you're already established works, and it'll make you seem more skillful... If you're able to keep your edge. Getting bad enough to fail at literal children's games anyway defeats the point.
I.E His motherfucking Pirate Yakuza playthrough. Granted, over the years Yakuza has hit some snags with the playable characters. You kinda get a pass for sucking, specially with some of them. So the game always leans more generous and more laissez-faire than tight. Which is a good thing.
Blockuza 3, Kiryu being super nerfed from 2, Kiryu in PS2 Yakuza being just god damn horrible and only saved by the enemies being retarded, 0 having extremely weird powerscaling and being outrageously easy at first then spiking super hard and having no NG+ for lore reasons, Tanimura would have been a living god in any other game but Yak4 renders him useless because the enemies are extremely passive coming off the heels of Blockuza 3, Saejima feeling like a super clunky version of Beast in 4, Saejima being both simultaneously busted and really really underwhelming in 5, GLORY TO SHINADA, HE HAS LIKE TWENTY DIFFERENT MOVESETS AND THEY ALL ROCK, you will never see him again, Judgment 1 Yagami being best played as a one button character, Akiyama being classified as "Somewhat difficult" by people in 4 then you realize he's got an easybake infinite, AND an i-frame startup guardbreak THAT LINKS INTO HIS INFINITE, Akiyama being super nerfed and tossed to the side after 5. Dragon Engine Kiryu is for the most part pretty damn good though, I haven't played him in Gaiden and I read that he's really not great. But you finally get to play Kuze's moveset in that game so I really think it'd be hard to stay mad for long.
As an aside, if Phil played the Yakuza 4 Sajima jailbreak section on NG Hard, it would absolutely demolish him. Hell, I think even on Legend with everything unlocked he'd die to Saito and Kiryu at least 10 or 15 times. Which is why if he plays it I can already hear the "I always play on Normal, the way the developer intended." Motherfucker, the developer USUALLY expects lil' Timmy to play on normal, not Big Dick Burnell with 30 years of experience. It's amazing that he somehow manages to suck at MINECRAFT of all things.
Now the thing is, you don't REALLY need to be a gaming god to beat a Yakuza game on Legend. You can very easily waltz through if just your blocking and attack timing are decent, not even good. I'm willing to bet 99% of even casual gamers could easily beat any of them on normal, and there might be some minor strain on Legend, but they'd also get it done. The enemies just simply don't do enough damage to be a real threat. For Pirate, the skill floor was lowered and the ceiling was raised. Majima plays like a much more modern character now. He has SOME ranged attacks, he has a counter from block, which is amazing because it's a counter that you can safely fuck up, he has some parries, and he has air combos. Sea Dog is a great addition and he plays better than his Kiwami 2 incarnation, though I'm sure some people will still miss some of his 0 stuff. His Mad Dog was reworked into being less of an unworkable meme with chip but unblockable damage and now it's a legit threat, too.
Then here comes ol' Philly with his gouty hooves to once again turn a beautiful saga into the most fucking boring let's play slop imaginable. Conveyor Belt Burnell, back on the saddle again, nose to the grindstone, shitting out yet another low quality playthrough for his 60K+ archive. At this point I imagine it's part his ego about supposedly helping Yakuza 4 go mainstream and the fact that Fat Kat plays them when he's done, probably while fantasizing about the playable men. But really, there's just no fucking point in him mangling the saga any more. With how long and slow paced it is, there's no way a TIHYDP will get made, either. This playthrough will at most be caught in bits and pieces by two dudes and it's essentially doomed to be unwatched and promptly forgotten.
Phil instantly took one look at Majima's new moveset and picked out the two moves he was gonna use, and you can probably guess which ones they are. Much like his Isshin playthrough was Ryoma Started Blasting: The Game, getting his hands on Majima didn't go much different: Sea Dog, Pistol spam, throw cutlasses, heal when he gets a booboo, spam dodge away like a maniac when an enemy so much as comes close. I don't think I've seen him react to a single thing, and yet when he got a purely spammed just dodge, he'd always hype himself up going "COUNTER, COUNTERRRR." Like motherfucker, I've seen you play Tekken, the only way you got your cheesy-ass Jun parries out was by fucking flowcharting them. He did not block parry once. His dodge counters were mostly just spamming at the right time, usually after facetanking a hit. This dude's reflexes are shot to shit.
The game seems to play fine, but I don't fucking see a point in a dude like Phil playing it. He's certainly not gonna no damage anything, he's not gonna edit and clip just the good parts to upload to his channel, which would legitimately be a service, he's not gonna do the hard fights, he once again played on normal so there's absolutely no tension, his pockets were overflowing with energy drinks at most points, so he never was at any real risk.
And he's not even invested in the story. I understand that Pirate is very much a clownshoes affair. I see why: After how grimdark the main storyline is getting with Ichiban just constantly getting fucked over, Kiryu having to face the fact that not many people in his line of work and lifestyle were uncharacteristically good like him and he mostly helped prop up an organization that ruthlessly destroyed lives, Kiryu getting cancer and getting physically weak... The writers probably thought people and themselves could do with a little break. Worry not, by the end, it turns out Majima was out in Hawaii to look for a cure for Kiryu...
And Phil seemed to have forgotten all about Kiryu having cancer. He wasn't even miffed that we didn't get to see the dude in person, he was just nodding along. He wasn't even happy that Kiryu was still alive. Classic Phil pigsplaining what just happened in the cutscene, like the rocks an old man had were actually the cure, philosophizing about how "Ya think he maybe tossed them in the sea because of all the bloodshed and greed that they caused?" Yes Phil, I do believe that was indeed the point. Good job, gold star. It's like he thinks he's smart for figuring out VERY clearly implied things. Dude needs to get out of Denton or let more average dudes into his chat. Spending so much time around Derish and Jayde has him thinking he's Neil Degrasse Tyson.
Again, it's watching a very low functioning autismo narc plodding his way along games in the dumbest way possible, with absolutely no stakes at all since he outheals all incoming damage with 99 Toughness Emperors in every fight. No wonder his numbers are down.
By the point he reached Samoa Joe he was facetanking mortals with abandon, seemingly not even trying to dodge shit, just facetank and outheal. It works, specially on normal, but if I was one of his dents I'd withdraw pahsitive support until he caves and starts playing shit on hard again, because this is as precisely as exciting as watching paint dry.
Another game banged out, great job mr Burnell, can we expect something interesting coming up or it's walksims and kid's games until the Khet comes home?
This dude needs to get on emulators if he intends to keep even a sliver of gaming prowess. It's like coming back to fighting games after two months of playing nothing but turnbased, you can feel you're too slow at processing the required information. Maybe his brain is just permanently out of comission at this point from all the booze and gacha brainrot.
Get this man on Tekken Force without savestates, stat. God damn Outlast on Insane. An actual FNAF playthrough. Kurohyou. Motherfucking Def Jam Vendetta on Hardest. Anything challenging, at all, please. At this point he's gotta realize that he has to pick something entertaining outside of "Scumbag Smurf Sfridays" into a double-day-awf khambo or whatever the fuck he's calling it now.
I still cannot believe his decline in live viewers. He is legitimately struggling to get 200 viewers now with Ethan Ralph on stream. I think it is a cross-contamination of PWR and re-streamers chipping away. I have to admit, as of the last few weeks, even his restreams have been mentally checked out.
