🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Moral plague]

I don't mean to alarm anyone but I asked an online java based Magic 8 Ball if Ethan Oliver Ralph is dead and it said yes three times!

My real life pigger ball is more powerful.
Bow before my magical might, Styxhexenhammer!!!

 

[parsnip]

ChatGPT says the odds aren't good for piggy

 

[RandomGibberish]

Holy shit it's real LMFAO
oh my god he actually went to Colombia thinking he's going to become a porn star fucking 18-year old porn trafficking victims... that's a new low even for Ralph

There‘s a market for fat ugly balding men fucking way out of their league women.
Ever heard of Torbe?

 

[Seethan Ralph]

The pig is fucked. How can anyone lack survival instinct that much, to go into this shithole?

 

[Sneed Force One]

He will always run this sektor, from the top on down. Kangs never die BISH

 

[Made In Wales]

View attachment 7289798

There‘s a market for fat ugly balding men fucking way out of their league women.
Ever heard of Torbe?

This gives me 'League Of Gentlemen' vibes...

'Hello... are you local?'

'This is a local gunt for local people...'

Also, Ethan's least favourite Beatles song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6B224XDJw6g&ab_channel=TheBeatles-Topic

 

[Rei is Shit.]

"I lived bish"

 

[3-2-1836]

Holy shit it's real LMFAO
oh my god he actually went to Colombia thinking he's going to become a porn star fucking 18-year old porn trafficking victims... that's a new low even for Ralph

Bold for you to assume they're even 18

 

[NoodleFucker3000]

Man that porn studio is gonna be so sad when they see the Memphis micro.

 

[OrionBalls]

Man that porn studio is gonna be so sad when they see the Memphis micro.

They'll keep him on as a fluffer or as a comparison to make the other dicks look huge.

 

[The Polaroid Man]

Man that porn studio is gonna be so sad when they see the Memphis micro.

Guaranteed he's going to be the cuck in whatever spic narco-terrorist funded rip-off of Blacked.com they got going down there.

 

[Oliver Onions]

There goes Ralph's only chance to beat Nick for Lolcow of the Year.

He's going to Colombia to try and make porn/host a wrestling event with prostitutes. There are so many ways for this to go horribly wrong I'd say his odds of stealing the crown from Nick are only going up.

I guess he's got a bad hangover and doesn't want to show how shittered he is,

Either that or he got jumped again and doesn't want to show his black eyes because he can't think of another 'tripped and hit the doorknob' cope.

 

[AncientPhosphur]

So what caused him to turn a short flight into a 3 day everyone thinks he’s dead? He missed the porn guy’s flight and pick up. How deep in a drug haze was he?

 

[break these cuffs]

So what caused him to turn a short flight into a 3 day everyone thinks he’s dead?

The usual. Now it's just a question of how badly he injured himself in the process.

 

[Adolf Hulkler]

View attachment 7289798

There‘s a market for fat ugly balding men fucking way out of their league women.
Ever heard of Torbe?

jesus fucking christ is that ugly guy bri´ish?
Hes got the britbong snaggle teeth

 

[jewsernotfound]

its gonna be so funny when ralph accidentally fucks a tranny down there if it hasn't already happened

edit: and im betting ralph will never intentionally show his dick on camera while down there. can't have the memphis micro exposed in 4k

 

[Trans Randy]

edit: and im betting ralph will never intentionally show his dick on camera while down there. can't have the memphis micro exposed in 4k

All of his shoots will be thumbing-based.

Edit: Further, I hope he does realize that every porno that would ever be released with him will have any combination of the tags "fat", "short", "midget", "goblin", "ugly" and "small penis".

 

[N1bbaN3rd]

South of the border wasn't far enough, he had to go south of the equator?

 

[Paranoia Machine]

I'm honestly impressed every time Ralph takes a plane somewhere. The strength of those engines are amazing. I think the extra time it took to get there was likely due to the engines having to work harder to get him there tho.


Unrelated, but you have no idea how badly I wish to be in a plane with Ralph when the engines give out for a moment and send the plane into a temporary free fall. Imaging his retarded voice freaking out makes my ribs hurt from laughing

 

[Adolf Hulkler]

after columbia gunt should go to south africa
i hear johannesburg is safe nowdays