Discussion/Show Recommendations for Non-Pozzed Children's Shows: A Guide for Kiwi Parents

[Next Task]

including the adults, who are usually encouraging that behavior

There's no humans in In the Night Garden - it was all things called something like Plinky-plongs or whatever.

 

[Anonitolia]

There's no humans in In the Night Garden - it was all things called something like Plinky-plongs or whatever.

They looked human enough to my tiny brain, and I could tell that the narrator was an adult too.

 

[Next Task]

They looked human enough to my tiny brain, and I could tell that the narrator was an adult too.

Well, that's for certain - it's Derek Jacobi.
Well, here's a link for the thread so others can make up their own mind. I do apologise as well - there's a whole bunch of human costumes. Turns out I remembered even less about a show I vaguely had on while babysitting years ago than I thought.

Though I will say, no matter what you expose kids to they're going to get terrified by something and you can't predict what. It's like their fear finds a focus and they'll be scared by something you would have sworn was innocuous at the time. Not to downplay the effect of In the Night Garden, but even if you try and keep out things that might scare them, you can't predict that suddenly something like Clifford the Big Red Dog or the Very Hungry Caterpillar suddenly gives them nightmares.

 

[Anonitolia]

no matter what you expose kids to they're going to get terrified by something and you can't predict what.

I think a show about a curious monkey or some toddler learning things is significantly less likely to terrify than a show in which most characters are creepy facsimiles of humans but only ever speak constant gibberish while referring to almost nothing a child knows correctly and smiling or dancing all the time

 

[Catgirl Tyranid]

Though I will say, no matter what you expose kids to they're going to get terrified by something and you can't predict what.

The vending machine on the moon of cheese in that one Wallace and Gromit episode is what made me realize that death was an inevitability. Much crying was had over a skiing vending machine antagonist when I realized its "happy ending" was temporary because no one was left on the moon to give it the quarters that brought it to life.

You never know what's going to set a kid off.

 

[Aunt Carol]

You never know what's going to set a kid off.

I would have late-night near-panics about what would happen if Scott Bakula Quantum Leap-ed into my body and had to pretend to know that he knew how I acted and what my daily life was like and what I was doing in school, and then everyone would think I was stupid or crazy, and also Scott Bakula would probably mess up my [new onset medical condition] and my parents wouldn't trust me any more.

Meanwhile, single-digits, no problem at all with original Twilight Zone or Outer Limits. You can guess what will upset a kid, but you can never be completely sure.

 

[ロボ﹏§¤r﹏h¶rœ]

Some of you seem to have forgotten your inner child and offer recs that are so bizarre that it leaves me baffled. I remember some of the stuff you mentioned being completely unwatchable when I was a kid, to the point I can revive that feeling of irritation at will.

• Ed, Edd, and Eddy - trash I couldn't stand. Ugly, unfunny, no grand adventure, walking pieces of excrement as characters. You shouldn't expect children to be amused by main characters who are unheroic and written as caricatures 'who had it coming' when something bad happens to them.
• Johnny Bravo - boring, nothing interesting ever happened, the MC was unbearable. Only watched where there was ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ELSE on.
• Sesame Street - boring, always skipped. SoL is NOT a genre children are typically interested in, at least not in that format. For me anything that involved 'live action' was an automatic downgrade to 'actually checking out your toys is a more worthwhile past-time'.
• The Tick - gross. Once you learn what kind of diseases ticks carry you can never view them as anything other than spawns of Satan that should be eradicated from existence by any means necessary, no matter the sacrifice.

BTW, the 'Parents Guide' section of IMDB entries can be helpful in determining if something is appropriate for kids in their given age range. Of course, it's fallible and only as good as the contributing community. As a side note, some of these write-ups can be so autistic they deserve their own KF thread. Posting an example from Shrek to illustrate my point:


Some (mostly all-ages) random recs from me:

• Maya the Bee (the old one)
• Lucky Luke
• The Adventures of Blinky Bill
• Tabaluga
• Adventures of the Gummi Bears
• Top Cat
• Madeline
• Count Duckula (the ending credits kind of freaked me out when I was 6 though)
• Winnie the Pooh
• Care Bears
• Hamtaro

OP might also be interested in what to stay away from. We, at kiwifarms.st, have you covered, OP!

• Times when woke / trannyshit was forced and unnecessarily added to Media
• Trans-made Media - Stories about genderspecials, by genderspecials

 

[Power Appreciator]

Dragon Ball Z & Grappler Baki. Make your child become the STRONGEST CHILD

 

[Aunt Carol]

Some of you seem to have forgotten your inner child and offer recs that are so bizarre that it leaves me baffled. I remember some of the stuff you mentioned being completely unwatchable when I was a kid, to the point I can revive that feeling of irritation at will.

The point is to compile a long list of un-pozzed options. Then a Kiwi's beloved hellspawn can decide for themself which shows they like, without picking a new animated life focus that's not just annoying but also sing-songing to them about genderspecials.

Klasky-Csupo stuff makes my skin crawl (other than Duckman, not a kids' show) but if ex-children remember loving Rugrats, their kids might like it too. It was a big property so it's good to hash out what themes the show has in it for reference.

A lot of posters report fond childhood memories of Ed, Edd and Eddy, so I think you have to chalk that up to de gustibus non est disputandum and just not put that cartoon on the menu you're offering your own personal children.

The Tick - gross. Once you learn what kind of diseases ticks carry you can never view them as anything other than spawns of Satan that should be eradicated from existence by any means necessary, no matter the sacrifice.

They actually brought up in the show that The Tick wasn't very committed to his theme.

 

[ロボ﹏§¤r﹏h¶rœ]

A lot of posters report fond childhood memories of Ed, Edd and Eddy, so I think you have to chalk that up to de gustibus non est disputandum and just not put that cartoon on the menu you're offering your own personal children.

I wouldn't want future animators to imitate that fugly artstyle, so hopefully nobody actually shows it to their kids.

Dragon Ball Z

Personally, I was more of a Pokemon maniac fan.

 

[eDove]

I can't say with the utmost certainty, but I'm pretty sure the Amazon Prime show "Tumble Leaf" is okay. There's also Shaun the Sheep, which is fantastic and enjoyable for adults too.

My son will be growing up in a pro piracy house, so I'll be able to be selective about what he watches and introduce him to older media. None of those faggoty streaming platforms that want to advertise AIDS medication and black female empowerment to him.

 

[Weed Eater]

My parents had me watch nothing but Christian shows when I was a kid. tbh most of them sucked, but when you had literally zero exposure to the other stuff kids are watching you don't realize how bad it is. As long as you don't let them watch anything with a budget they won't know any better and will probably enjoy it.

Donut Man and Davey and Goliath were pretty neat Veggietales is unironically fantastic and should be shown to your kid if you're at all religious, however the show I enjoyed the most was one called The Story Keepers. It had it all, action, characters in epic lifethreatening scenarios, Tim Curry, heroes and villains, and Bible stories (yeah sure the animation is bad especially early on, but again if you've never seen a Cartoon Network show, let alone a Disney animated movie it looked cool). Keep in mind, most of the competition for other Christian shows was live action of some dude reading from the Bible, so it's easy to see why it stuck out.

No idea if your kid will like them, but I watched them and ended up here instead of some tranny discord server so it's got to have something going for them. They're also pretty much guaranteed not to have anything more pozzed than a black character.

Oh yeah, and Bibleman is amazing too, not because the show itself is any good, but because it gave birth to this video.

View attachment 5289565

Whether you were raised to be religious or not, Veggietales is THE SHIT. I would argue it's one of the best pieces of entertainment written for children, even despite it's Christian background and it's levels of preaching.

I don't even have a favorite Silly Song, there are too many good gems.

 

[Day Walker]

https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLHeaIWvdbER3Ic90BzhPsH2aJ5KI3UtmM

Liberty’s Kids is show from the 90’s about the American Revolution. A bit of over stuff but still good for grade school aged kids.

 

[Iron Jaguar]

Sesame Street - boring, always skipped

Boring and preachy, with an obvious Leftist agenda. I hated this show so much.

 

[Old Man In The Way]

Sorry to necro the thread, but would anyone have some kids documentaries to recommend? The basic stuff like space, nature, dinosaurs and history/prehistory (with history i'm finding it very hard to know what to trust as I am not history buff. at this point I'll settle for just about anything as long as it's accurate and bearable to watch).

i offer some of my own contributions. apologies if any of them have already been mentioned.
- Wander Over Yonder
- The Koala Brothers
- Lilo & stitch the series
- Kim Possible
- Frog and Toad

 

[starborn427614]

Sorry to necro the thread, but would anyone have some kids documentaries to recommend? The basic stuff like space, nature, dinosaurs and history/prehistory (with history i'm finding it very hard to know what to trust as I am not history buff. at this point I'll settle for just about anything as long as it's accurate and bearable to watch).

i offer some of my own contributions. apologies if any of them have already been mentioned.
- Wander Over Yonder
- The Koala Brothers
- Lilo & stitch the series
- Kim Possible
- Frog and Toad

I wouldn't call it a documentary series per se, but if you're wanting kids to get into history then the TV adaptation of Horrible Histories might be good.

 

[Optantrix]

Sorry to necro the thread, but would anyone have some kids documentaries to recommend? The basic stuff like space, nature, dinosaurs and history/prehistory (with history i'm finding it very hard to know what to trust as I am not history buff. at this point I'll settle for just about anything as long as it's accurate and bearable to watch).

There are some fish documentaries on Prime that my son seems to enjoy! Wildest Places: Pacific and Ultimate Oceans we're pretty good and kept him entertained. There appear to be several Wildest Places like one on Antarctica. Wild North also pops up, sometimes we put on Bejeweled Fish which is just fish swimming around with calming music!

 

[Old Man In The Way]

I wouldn't call it a documentary series per se, but if you're wanting kids to get into history then the TV adaptation of Horrible Histories might be good.

I vaguely remember Horrible Histories actually. And they have an official youtube channel that I can download from. Thank you, will give that a try.

There are some fish documentaries on Prime that my son seems to enjoy! Wildest Places: Pacific and Ultimate Oceans we're pretty good and kept him entertained. There appear to be several Wildest Places like one on Antarctica. Wild North also pops up, sometimes we put on Bejeweled Fish which is just fish swimming around with calming music!

My son likes fish as well so he might enjoy this. Thank you!

Also, I recalled something that might be worth recommending if anyone ITT have children obsessed with cars like my own: car restoration youtube videos. They're not "made" for kids but I've never encountered one that was inappropriate. Many have very chill, or even zero commentary and if it ever got obnoxious I'd mute it and play music instead. Combined with sponsorblock it's pretty wholesome.

 

[Pina Colada]

Between the Lions is a must-watch for 5-and-unders!

• Teaches them to read and enunciate (especially vowels) at the perfect slow, soothing, and steady pace
• Takes place in a library and encourages them to visit their own
• Introduces different literary formats/genres (picture books, fables, short stories)
• Sesame Workshop wasn't involved during production, but it was created by an alumni
• Has 10 seasons, but would probably stop showing after the 5th since it changes formats

Dragon Ball Z

I would introduce the Kai cut first when they're about 10/11 as it takes out the excessive filler, blood, and gore; they generally have a decent grasp on death/losing a loved one around the same age too.

 

[Catgirl Tyranid]

My wife recently found "Danny Go" on youtube and my son loves it. The videos are all movement themed encouraging kids to get up and take part in whatever "adventure" or activity is going along with the song.



Their website's about page describes them below:



My favorite so far has been when they track down and fight the bad CGI "shark king" to steal his giant golden shark tooth whose main attack is throwing bad CGI star fish occasionally alternating with using its tail fin to throw a whirlpool. The kids are supposed to side step away from or duck to avoid the starfish and then eventually spin around to throw the whirlpool back at the bad CGI shark king. The capstone is a rush to swim to the surface after the bad CGI shark king calls on his brothers to "AVVEEEENNNGGGEEE MEEEEE" and a bunch CGI Hammerheads rise from the depths to give chase.

Many, but not all, of the videos I've seen my kids watch seem to follow this simple adventure format where you travel to a location, deal with ramping up challenges involved in the movements, fight some kind of boss and/or need to escape once your goal has been achieved.

Some however are just about pirates swabbing the deck to teach kids to clean their rooms.

Naturally I haven't seen all the videos, but the ones I have seen haven't revealed anything pozzed. The only thing that gives me pause is a character named "Mr. Bearhead" which is literally some guy with a.. teddy bear head. I assume it's my overexposure to internet memes setting off alarm bells here, but something to keep an eye on.

..?

---

I like that instead of his eyes glazing over on the couch my son is jumping around and dancing with the videos and the songs aren't so bad that I mind them going on in the background while trying to get chores done and a few are ear worms that are pretty catchy.

Does anyone else have knowledge about this show that would be cause for concern?