storytime - - some of my boring garbage

[ArgonianVoter]

So when Trump was first being elected I wasn't old enough to vote yet and I still had a year to go.
and we all went to history class and there stood one of the single worst teacher to ever exist, I think his name started with a G maybe?

in any case this moment in particular had always stood out to me, the second we walked into the room despite it being a school setting he went straight into politics and the announcement was something like

"Listen I know you're all scared, but there's still people in charge, it's not the end of the world. It'll all be okay"
a student tried to speak
he shushed them and told them he didn't want to hear it and then uttered under his breath that we were all going to struggle for a while.

as if we didn't live in the most fucking rural setting on earth and probably 70% of the people there supported Trump.

I know it didn't really matter or effect anything but the moment was so incredibly bizarre I wanted to share it. This was one of my first interactions with Trump Derangement Syndrome afterall.

 

[Daddy's Angry Juice]

I once saw Null at the grocery store buying like 15 milky ways.

 

[Cemetery Support]

I didn't score high enough on the autism questionnaire for there to be more formal testing involved, but I was pretty close.

 

[ShahOfIran1979]

I was on the bus recently, and a cute blond chick lost her balance and fell backward. Seeing her fall backward, I caught her in my arms. I then gave her a sexy look, and told her "looks like you've fallen for me" and I winked. I shit you not, the whole entire bus started clapping and cheering for me. What a day.

 

[We Are The Witches]

Some weeks ago I saw a stink bug!

 

[Chicha Drinker]

One of my first drug experiences, it was new years and I was shooting off fire crackers with my friends, all around having a pretty chill time when this guy comes up to me and asks if I have a lighter, I say yeah and give it to him, he then takes the lighter and hits a fat rip off an apple bong (a bong made from an apple), I just kinda stood there confused wtf just happened and my friends explained that's how dealers around there would deal drugs, inside of apples.

 

[Celebrate Nite]

 

[Xenu]

I was on the bus recently, and a cute blond chick lost her balance and fell backward. Seeing her fall backward, I caught her in my arms. I then gave her a sexy look, and told her "looks like you've fallen for me" and I winked. I shit you not, the whole entire bus started clapping and cheering for me. What a day.

And then you woke up.

source: I was there looking through your window

 

[Tragi-Chan]

One time at band camp I stuck a flute in my pussy.

 

[hacxx]

Voting for 1 billion.

 

[Daddy's Angry Juice]

View attachment 7314027

(KICKS DOWN THE DOOR)

 

[Gaddafi]

I got a girlfriend but she goes to a different school

 

[Brenda Holiday]

My dad works at nintendo and he says coomers will make sure they'll still make money

 

[Doktor Grimm]

when i was a young lad (twelve or so) i consumed the mummified corpse of a small bird off the side of the road and was infected with a brain eating worm. no body knows its still in there

 

[Niggolash]

and then uttered under his breath that we were all going to struggle for a while.

I hope he remembered this during the Biden years.

 

[Hellwalker]

One time at band camp I stuck a flute in my pussy.

What did it feel like when someone blew on the flute?

 

[56 others]

One time at band camp I stuck a flute in my pussy.

What note did you play?

One time we were smoking weed in a forested park by the river. A helicopter spotlighted us with its... spotlight. I freaked out, but it was just the national guard in a black hawk hovering down the river for some reason

 

[DankSmoker]

I voted for Kanye West once, but that was when he was a funny schizo but now he's gone full homo becoming bedfellows with the catboy fuentez army and admitted to molesting his cousin so I dont think he represents my interests anymore.

 

[Cemetery Support]

1. My neighbor, a special needs older gentleman, has the most prescient, clear understanding of the world that he just lets loose at random to whomever will hear. Extremely salient takes on everything.

2. I use KF so much that I often try to react to incoming texts with the same set of stickers this site provides. I have to stop myself and substitute an emoji in the place of the one conjured to mind, because no one is going to understand the rainbow emoji to mean optimistic, or the garbage emoji to mean stupid.