MEN! Do you shake it or wipe it? - Pee question

[POWER IN MISERY]

This is unironically an act I have performed in restaurant bathrooms while on dates where events seemed to be progressing in my favor. It's a circumstance where you don't necessarily want either of you to encounter a smell evocative of mustard-packed sardines, burnt popcorn, or that side of roasted asparagus the next time it's out of your pants.

i believe this underappreciated technique is called "The Waffle House Dirty Bird"

 

[Jarl Varg]

I shake it more than twice. Therefore, I am playing with it.

 

[Mysterious Figure]

Men wipe themselves?

 

[Mesh Gear Fox]

Men wipe themselves?

Yes, some of us use tissue to blot dry any remaining urine.

 

[Mysterious Figure]

Of course I wipe my ass

You get pee on your ass?

 

[The Lawgiver]

KONG QIU SAY:
View attachment 7323893
"Wet dick is what underwear is for."

I fucking still hate it when I'm done pissing, shit's dry and won't come out, and then when I pull up my pants the fucking little piss droplets come out and stain em with a tiny speck of wet piss

No matter what you do, there will always be a last drop. I just accept that and shower regularly to change underwear to make up for it.

Sometimes there isn't.
...However also sometimes if you're focused on some shit, chill and haven't pissed for a while you go tot he bathroom next time you gotta piss and there's like phantom piss droplets there I KNOW I DIDN'T PISS WHERE THE FUCK DID THE TINY WET SPECK COME FROM
I DID NOT DO THE PEEPEE CHAT
Seriously though jokes it gets me so fucking angry sometimes. I don't care if it's like just one or 2 hyper specific droplets of wet if I'm nearby a place where I can get another pair of underwear that shit's going on and the piss droplet underwear be the droplets before or after pissing are gonna be chucked into the fucking wash.

You should dab.

You ever had the pee mucus thing happen when shitting? The dab's for that.

 

[DefinitelyNotMe]

Shake of course. Wiping isnt gonna hel when payload is stuck mid transit.

 

[Dr Cruel]

I DID NOT DO THE PEEPEE CHAT

 

[Lapsus of the bepsus]

pee mucus

uhh elaborate? or dont either way is ok i guess

 

[cockaine]

I shake that shit I wiggle it around like the inflatable dancing guy at the car dealership

 

[The Ugly One]

Since I always keep a supply of maxi pads on hand in case a lady should suddenly need one, I just use one of those.

 

[The Lawgiver]

uhh elaborate? or dont either way is ok i guess

 

[Detective Carey]

pee mucus

First of all kind sir, you might have the French disease, and may consider consulting your local apothecary.

Gentleman! I come bearing good news for those that find the dab method too sodomy adjacent due to it sharing a name with that fagatronic dance the younglings were all doing a decennary back.

May I suggest pipe cleaners? The best part is that when you are finished thoroughly drying, you can craft them into whimsical and artistic shapes to leave behind in the privy to entertain and impress newcomers!

A word of warning, the bristled version is only for the most stout of adventurers.