RandomGibberish
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2025
He only posts pictures of his face from certain angles because HE'S FAT! and what he eats.
He is a woman after all.
🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit
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He only posts pictures of his face from certain angles because HE'S FAT! and what he eats.
He is a woman after all.
- Joined
- Apr 2, 2021
YOUR HONOR, I WAS ONLY PRETENDING TO BE RETARDED SO I COULD AFFORD A BIRTHDAY GIFT FOR MY SUHHHNN!!
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2020
I'm not sure which term is gonna stick. Gonzo journalism or planned relapse. Both are pretty good but for different reasons.
The former is great since it's how Ralph is describing it and it'll be the equivalent of rubbing a dog's nose in his own piss/shit, except this dog is retarded and will pretend he's in on the joke even though it's absolutely embarrassing. Well, until he gets plastered again and hollers at the alogs.
The latter is also great since it's pretty witty and just an absolutely ridiculous concept. Planned obsolescence. Planned bankruptcy. Now planned relapse.
Dropa5pack
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 18, 2025
If Ralph’s current life is five star days, I sure don’t wanna find out what four star days look like.
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2022
A Ralphamale is never sloppy drunk, nor incidentally sober due to poverty.
He straightens out and gets fucked up precisely when he intends to.
He straightens out and gets fucked up precisely when he intends to.
Gator_Aids
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2025
I’ve been giving this some thought. If charges are brought, Ralph has to either accept them or argue that he’s such a pill popping alcoholic that his enemies can reliably take advantage of this to cause him to restream his revenge porn. I’m sure Faith and Meigh will attempt to use this as a way of preventing him from seeing his kids further. Ralph’s in a bit of a Gunt-22
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2021
I want it to go to trial so during discovery they can reveal the post was viewed 683 times by an IP in Rocklin.
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2020
It really is amazing. Imagine Ralph trying to explain Gonzo journalism to a judge as a justification.
"Yah honah, I was doing what they call "a work". It's a term in the wrasslin' business used to trick peepull into thinkin' somethin' fake as somethin' real. Ya see ya honah, I was taking doze prescription Xanax bahs and mixin' vodka with milk in my mouth to work the alawgs so dey'd gib me moneh. I axxidentleh streamed dat video because I waz undah the influence and doze damn, dirty alawggz tricked me at mah lowest moment......I lub mah son....."
I think there's something to this. Ralph has been extremely bothered by the potential Faith/Xanduh ramifications to the point that it feels like something is up. I know courts generally want a father to be involved with their child's life, to some extent, but he's making an easy case for the court to put the kibash on his court-ordered, mandatory visits if Faith ever wanted to challenge it. Doubly so if he's super behind on child support payments.
Amanda and Cozy.tv Rozy is a different story. Ignoring the impossible logistics for Ralphavisits, Pantsu and Harreh seem to be prepared to drop a nuclear bomb on Ralph if he ever pushes for visitation. Plus, Harry is not nearly the retard that Ralph 2 is so I don't think he'll Mr. Magoo the situation where Ralph manages to succeed. That, and I'm certain Harreh has no qualms with putting a loaded shotgun in Ralph's face if he ever sets foot in New York.
- Joined
- Apr 2, 2021
See the thing is with Gonzo journalism is you actually have to you know, do journalism. You can't just go on a bender then have everyone stitch together the story of what happened to you over the course of the next few months as it slowly leaks out or you continue to get high and accidentally reveal embarrassing details.
I would love to see Hunter S. Thompson if he just went "Yeah, you know I did a buncha drugs, disappeared for a week, it was badass, but you just totally gotta take my word for it."
Also the idea of a planned relapse might be the funniest thing of all time, he knows he fucked up so bad he can't even say he was faking it, so he has to say "Yeah, I planned to do drugs on purpose and make death threats to estranged family members." I garuntee he is going to try to the "You're Honor, I'm an entertainer." defense so all the death threats and drug binges are totally part of his job, not just him being a sad fucking loser living in exile in a third world country.
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2022
Lol I like how the ai gave him normal sized man hands because it doesn't know how small his hands actually are.
- Joined
- Sep 17, 2021
If the old adage about the size of a man's johnson being preportional to the size of his hands is accurate and assuming it would also be accurate in the inverse; I can only imagine Ralph probably has little baby hands like that bit from Deadpool.
Don'tAnalizeMeBro!
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2021
IIRC the whole visitation arc was only because Faith has allowed visitation under the current circumstances (he pays for the visit to be at a facility that provides protection, dates and times must be made in advance, etc.) from the start. I think @MWV has said that the Gunt’s status on paying his child support does not take away from his visitation rights,.
- Joined
- Apr 6, 2023
It will work. Turns out the Judge, the bailiff and the stenographer are all big fans of The Killstream, if you want to know the truth about it.
Gator_Aids
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2025
The universe has a chance to do the funniest thing ever and have Ralph move in with Andy Dick.
Blue Gunty
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 19, 2025
We're going to need @Null to tweet at Ralph and declare that he cannot afford California and there's no way he'll move there just so that he will do it out of spite.
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2016
In the state of Californee, Colombian dick-girls are legally women so Ralph legally wouldn't be gay. Checkmate idiots.
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2020
Ralph living in California...thats just hilarious. If he thinks public transport is bad in Mexico just wait for California - you need to be armed at all times basically.
Maker's Mark
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 16, 2024
One of those hurdles for Ralph is not immediately getting arrested when he arrives.
Blue Gunty
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 19, 2025
You need to be armed but it’s illegal to be armed without a permit, and he sure won’t pass the background check being a felon who attacked a female cop. Also, I wonder if a car dealership could even get him approved for a loan after he defaulted on the Red Nissan truck. I doubt the dealership could even repo it either, is that just considered theft at that point?
Um...
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Oct 16, 2016
His reptile brain thinks he’s gonna keep making $500/day on his show and he’s having visions about living happily ever after in Cali seeing his suuhhnnnn whenever he wants, complete with happy family holidays/birthday celebrations etc all together. He’s done this before, like when he was planning out his life with the girlfriend-for-hire (‘muh girlfriend who ah loove’- ‘maybe we’ll live in Europe, she’s never been and thinks she’d like it’) or being Dick Masterson’s cohost (again, living the good life in Cali. with his suuhhnnn nearby, happy family times etc.) And fantasizing about that physiotherapist, thought she was really into him. And the hooker in Colombia he had the deep magical connection with, he was gonna ‘fly her into Merida.’ And he just has to run to Twitter to share his happy plans, every time.
He’ll never be able to live anywhere in America again, let alone S. Cali. He couldn’t even rent a room here with the $250/month he’s paying in rent now, for starters.Keep dreaming tho piggy. there in your third world hellhole.
He’ll never be able to live anywhere in America again, let alone S. Cali. He couldn’t even rent a room here with the $250/month he’s paying in rent now, for starters.Keep dreaming tho piggy. there in your third world hellhole.