🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

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Will the "MMA" fight between Gabe Hoffman and Ethan Ralph 🐷 happen?

  • YES!

    Votes: 26 7.4%
  • lol no

    Votes: 323 92.6%

  • Total voters
    349
Beneath all that bluster and bragging and posturing is an insecure little fat kid terrified of being ignored and alone.
A little fat BPD girl who can NOT handle rejection. He even confided in Harry Morris that he thinks he might have BPD (those DMs were funny btw. ā€œA-ah’ve just been SO UPSET since Amanda left meh, Harreh. A-ah think ah might have BPD, Harreh.ā€) which Heinous Harry immediately posted on Twitter.
 
Since Ralph was ready to follow the advice of Sir Anthony Hopkins self-help author Brianna Wiest (who’s probably a disloyal bitch tbh) he should buy one of her guided journals. Maybe one of Ralph’s fans can buy him the guided journal entitled ā€œI Am the Hero of My Own Lifeā€ which seems custom made for Ralph and might help him finish his much anticipated autobiography.

But Brianna seems to have written a book aimed directly at the Ralphamale entited ā€œThe Mountain is You: Transforming Self-Sabotage into Self-Masteryā€ This seems like just the audiobook that will turn things around for Ralph.
 
We tend to judge people by our own standards. Because Ralph is deviant, spiteful, paranoid, selfish, vengeful and insecure, he assumes everyone else is too. He snakes on everyone eventually, so he thinks they'll snake on him and is stocking up on weaponry in the interim.
It's a good job he's on supervised visitation. Imagine what would have happened when Xander marked Ralph's hat if they were alone?
on that note, remember he sneakily took a picture of warski's passport when they were living together in miami, and held on to it for 4 years before releasing it to the world as a payback for the 'bog hog'
 
His psych profile isn't really too complex or out of the ordinary.
Oh, I agree, but it's like "How does someone have all the characteristics he does and seemingly have a multiplier". His personality and emotional maturity is basically the cookie cutter of all cookie cutters to end up like Ralph.

IMO, you can ultimately trace a lot of it back to his supreme inability to confront any difficulty or conflict in his life. I get that sometimes, life sucks, but Ralph's solution to every problem, no matter how big or small, is invariably:

- Take pills
- Get drunk
- Holler
- Ignore and never address the problem

You can trace the development of his mentality through his childhood up through GooberGrape, up to IBS, and until the crumbling state of the sektur as it is now
It's still crazy to know Ralph was really like this before the sektur was born. Ordinarily, you'd expect he was just some 18 year old who was relatively normal and garned a moment of niche e-fame, whose life went to shit afterwards, but nope. He was early-to-mid 30s, had all these negative traits, and his life was already shit. A LOT less shitty in retrospect.

Fortunately, a brief opportunity called GooberGobber provided him a chance to believe it could change. That one spec of reprieve from Ralph's miserable existence led him to believe the recipe, that compromises the Ralphamale worked. That he finally cracked the code and made it big. As it turns out, it did not. It most certainly did not.
This is the logical conclusion of a reactionary, cowardly, but most of all incredibly fragile ego. Beneath all that bluster and bragging and posturing is an insecure little fat kid terrified of being ignored and alone.
You'd have figured there's a certain point where someone adjusts the trajectory. Not that Ralph was ever destined for greatness, much less mediocrity, but you have to imagine the insecure little fat kid inside of him is constantly saying, "I don't like this. I don't want to live alone in a Mexican shack. I don't want to pound booze and xannies to get through the day anymore.", but nope. That voice gets drowned out immediately by pills and booze. The alogs mustn't win, no matter the cost, even though paying the cost is miserable. Thankfully, the xanax and liquor help alleviate that!
I hope Ralph never finds out that he can get d-bol at the local pharmacia. I'd be so owned if he started juicing out and became an absolute goliath.
I mean, it's not all bad. It might help his deflated tits.
Not likely. He just has 15 lb Amazon weights and ozempic
I miss when he was using that to prove to the alogs his arm still worked. TBH, it's better than nothing. I've never seen someone who was able-bodied (relatively) and had the muscle atrophy of a paraplegic.
 
I'd be so owned if he started juicing out and became an absolute goliath.
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Ralphamale is a true clickbait philosopher.
He pretends to like Marcus Aurelius, so he could take some of these to heart:

Understand however that every man is worth just so much as the things are worth about which he busies himself.

In the morning, when thou art sluggish at rousing thee, let this thought be present; ā€œI am rising to a man’s work.ā€

You want praise from people who kick themselves every fifteen minutes, the approval of people who despise themselves. Is it a sign of self-respect to regret nearly everything you do?

... be tolerant with others and strict with yourself.

A man should be upright, not kept upright.

The mind is the ruler of the soul. It should remain unstirred by agitations of the flesh--gentle and violent ones alike. Not mingling with them, but fencing itself off and keeping those feelings in their place.

Take heed not to be transformed into a Caesar, not to be dipped in the purple dye, for it does happen. Keep yourself therefore, simple, good, pure, grave, unaffected, the friend of justice, religious, kind, affectionate, strong for your proper work. Wrestle to be the man philosophy wished to make you. Reverence the gods, save men.
 
This weekend was a complete and utter Ralphamale W.

  • Worked the alogs thinking he was detained
  • Lightly poked Jim after Jim fell for the work which resulted in Jim posting his Coomer Anime Dungeon
  • RPG tag-teamed with Ralph by dunking on Jim's self-own which Ralph set up.
  • No revenge porn charges
  • Outed Faiths X alt which is going to make any "Ralph's using Xander as a prop" allegations harder to prove since she's blatantly trying to use him as a prop to get one over on Ralph.
  • Ralph played her to return Xander with the dinosaur for day 2.
  • Didn't lose anything
If Ralph keeps this up and moves to California I could see him unironically getting partial custody of Xander. Then once he proves he in fact is not Satan incarnate like the Vickers and Morris's paint him as, he can start pushing to get retribution on Amanda by owning her in divorce court and maybe getting a favorable custody agreement for Rozy of course the Morris court failings will be funded by Harry the Cuck who lost his wife to a rando and Alice to Ralph.

Fly high King, you've earned this Ultra W
 
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Like many o'Ralphathings, how he thinks this owns the alogs is beyond my comprehension. At best, maybe he's interpreting his seething as Faith not letting Xanduh see him? Ofc, everyone else sees it as "Imma gonna force my suunn to see meh whether he a'likes it or nahht.
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He's got da pictorial ebidence, he just doesn't want to post it though. (i.e., he doesn't have the pictorial ebidence.) When has Faith posted anything remotely related to Ralph's conversations recently? He's not gonna go low though (LOL) since he brought him a dinosaur or some shit, but he's sure as hell gonna save that in his back pocket. I'm not particularly sure how Xanduh talking to Cozy.tv Rozy owns the alogs, but Ralph certainly thinks it does. I think it's more likely than Ralph is relying on the words of his 4 year old son that he talked to Cozy.tv Rozy. Moreso than Faith telling him, anyways.

I haven't a clue why he's so adamant that this somehow owns the alogs while also something he's supposed to explicitly approve though. Especially when it's clearly eating him up that he can't prove the alogs wrong.

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Prolly not a great sign when the only ones replying are the alogs and both have infinitely more likes than you. Especially for someone whose Twitter is their pride and joy.
 
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I'm very curious what his pill-addled brain conjures up as reasons other than price. It's not like he's got a credit card to accrue miles. Can't really claim it's for logistical reasons either since it has to be a pain in the ass to rely on trolleys and shuttles to waddle back and forth across the border every day regardless. Too poor to stay in Sandy Eggo, but that'd be a money issue.

Closest explanations I can come up with are:

- Departure times for 8-layover flight path are more convenient. It's retarded, but halfway plausible.

- He's banned from certain airports or airlines.

- Purple retard passport is causing issues.

Ofc, I'd hazard a guess that money is the most important reason as a mattah of fact, but probably not the sole factor.

How and why isn't Faith pulling the plug on his visitations after the shitshow that was the last month?
Easy. She's a retard. The woman ran across the country with the sole intent to be impregnated by someone virtually identical to Ralph 2. The fact she's not under the spotlight doesn't mean she's any less of a retard.
 
How and why isn't Faith pulling the plug on his visitations after the shitshow that was the last month?
I think they have the type of arrangement that as long Ralph isn’t obviously inebriated at visitations it’s alright. It’s already established he is incapable of being alone with a child and needs actual adults to monitor him around his child for a brief 2 hours. It’s not a visit as much as a reminder of what Ralph is missing out on by being a piece of shit, which is why Faith probably agreed to it.

This is the types of visitations abusive addicts get with their kids. It’s supposed to be a motivator to get their life together but Ralph cannot handle more than 8 hours a year and seems fine with it. He doesn’t actually want to be a father, just see the ebedence solooging in a teen produced a result.

He admitted he couldn’t even keep up with Xander during a brief visit because he’s like an 80 year old man and can’t handle any sort of aerobic demand. He probably starts hacking just walking a few feet. By five Xander will be disgusted by the decrepit, smelly guy he has to go see once in awhile. Babies aren’t aware of age, illness and disease but these start registering as red flags starting at age four. Sometime in the next year Ralph will start registering as really gross to Xander, esp if he’s around a young, healthy step-dad and uncles. He can have an Uncle Ethan and gross Grandpa Ethan. Grandpa Matt looks younger and healthier than Ralph.
 
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