Groceries and a car? Nah, fuck that! I'd rather buy He Man toys and pay to get pubic hair removed from my inverted dick canal. Ever wonder why you're not rich Colton? This is part of it.
If it's not stinkditch hair removal, what's the alternative, removing his stubble? He's already balding naturally.
What car show allows random retards to drive classic cars? Legit never heard of this.
I am glad to see Colton is finally celebrating both his mexican heritage and fat with early AM bean dip.
I don't know which is funnier, the fact that he legitimately feels threatened by a 15 year old's harmless opinions, or the fact that he's taking the troll bait way too seriously by somebody named "Gay Buttsex in the Ass".
Also colton, you realize you being color blind would be BETTER than being a fucking retard too DUMB to identify what pink is right? so you aren't color blind, just retarded.
Slightly late, but it's this thread's one year anniversary. Here's to another year of coping, seething and dilating with the Rod of Pain. Don't forget your Rod of Pain Colton.
"Colton wakes up early, gets the rod of pain.
Life can get so swirly, but he won't complain."
That was the first Suno AI song that really caught and hooked in my brain like a true ear-worm.
"Rod of pain, oh rod of pain..." I hope it's not permanently lost on his profile, I don't recall if it was there or on his thread that it was posted but either way I'm pretty sure I saved a copy on my office PC.
I hope it's not permanently lost on his profile, I don't recall if it was there or on his thread that it was posted but either way I'm pretty sure I saved a copy on my office PC.
I found it, I had linked it from the profile into this thread. Bringing it over for an anniversary repeat now. Rod of Pain
Colton wakes up early
Grabs the Rod of Pain
Life can get so swirly
But he won’t complain
[Verse 2]
Every single morning
Duties to maintain
Faces the day yawning
With the Rod of Pain
[Chorus]
Rod of Pain oh Rod of Pain
Keeps me going every day
Though it’s tough I won’t abstain
Rod of Pain please guide my way
[Verse 3]
Challenges and hardships
Colton’s on a quest
Through every single trip
Rod puts him to the test
[Bridge]
Through the joy and sorrow
Facing life’s terrain
There’s no fear of tomorrow
With the Rod of Pain
[Chorus]
Rod of Pain oh Rod of Pain
Keeps me going every day
Though it’s tough I won’t abstain
Rod of Pain please guide my way!
Happy KF anniversary Colton! You are still my gay buttsex doll after all these years! Now are you going to rejoin the farms so we can fuck your ass again?
I don't know which is funnier, the fact that he legitimately feels threatened by a 15 year old's harmless opinions, or the fact that he's taking the troll bait way too seriously by somebody named "Gay Buttsex in the Ass".
Here is another true statement:
Mr. Lopez was his elementary school teacher in the 5th grade. His classmates were Juan, Jose, Jose, Jose, Juan, Maria, Maria, Maria, Juan, Juanita.
Colton has been pretty boring lately, he hasn't been seething about Kiwi Farms, and is busy telling young pooners that they aren't really men. With Colton's recent trip to the car show, it felt like a good time to discuss his favorite car! Here are some facts about the V8 Plymouth Barracuda:
Configuration options for the V8 Plymouth Barracuda included a range of powerful engines, such as the 383 cubic inch and the iconic 426 Hemi, which contributed to its reputation as a formidable muscle car.
Optimized for performance, the V8 Plymouth Barracuda featured options like a heavy-duty suspension and performance tires, enhancing its handling and driving dynamics on the road.
Leading the way in muscle car innovation, the V8 Plymouth Barracuda was one of the first cars to offer a factory-installed rear spoiler, which not only improved aerodynamics but also added to its aggressive appearance.
The V8 Plymouth Barracuda was introduced in 1964 and quickly gained popularity for its sporty design and powerful engine options, making it a standout in the muscle car market.
Only a few years after its debut, the V8 Plymouth Barracuda became one of the first muscle cars to offer a fastback design, which contributed to its sleek and aggressive appearance.
Named after a predatory fish, the V8 Plymouth Barracuda was designed to embody speed and agility, reflecting its performance-oriented nature in the muscle car market.
In 1970, the V8 Plymouth Barracuda received a significant redesign, featuring a more aggressive front end and a wider stance, which enhanced its performance and visual appeal.
Sporting a distinctive design, the V8 Plymouth Barracuda featured a long hood and short rear deck, which became iconic elements of its muscle car aesthetic.
As one of the earliest pony cars, the V8 Plymouth Barracuda was introduced just two weeks before the Ford Mustang, making it a significant player in the muscle car market.
Model years from 1970 to 1971 saw the introduction of the "Shaker" hood option for the V8 Plymouth Barracuda, which featured a distinctive air intake that protruded through the hood, enhancing both performance and style.
As part of its appeal, the V8 Plymouth Barracuda offered a range of vibrant color options, including the famous "Hemi Orange," which became synonymous with high-performance muscle cars of the era.
Numerous performance options were available for the V8 Plymouth Barracuda, allowing buyers to customize their cars with powerful engines and features tailored to their driving preferences. Edit: That was fast. I wonder how often he checks his thread? Link (A)
Lol Kiwifarms still lying bout my trip to the museum was a car show when I pointed out many times over it was not a car show and showed on the museums website that they offered it as a driving class but no...lets ignore those facts.
The evil kiwis also ignore the fact how my deadname isn't my name or my gender. But hey they are transphobic bigoted pieces of shit and thats what they do. They love to beat down trans people just tryin to go bout their day being reg people who just so happen to be trans.
Then they go bout random technical mechcanical bullshit bout the specs of the green 1968 Plymouth Barracuda 383 Formula S 4 speed stick I drove and learned stick on like anybody gives a fuck bout that except gearheads and classic/muscle car fanatics and Mopar lovers.
Kiwifarmers really do seem to have nothin better to do with their lives than to drag people down and bully them and try to fuck round with em any way they can to hurt them from a distance.
Lucky for me, people are not taking pictures and such of me out in public like bigfoot like they are doing with Chris Chan even though it's prob obvious where I frequent some places for food and collectible hunting n such.
I guess if I can't be famous and loved....might as well be the complete opposite and be infamous and hated. Either way it could be a win cuz I live in their head rent free when they honestly got better things to do or worry bout than focusing on whatever the hell I'm up to.
I'm normally not up to anything. I am usually just chillin havin kitty time or collectible huntin being a fuckin neeeerrrd lookin for Hot Wheels or vintage 80s shit like Ghostbusters. I really just get out for concerts n events the most.
Imma do me and enjoy what I like doin and the evil kiwis are gonna evil kiwi no matter what I end up doin. It really is a matter of it is what it is and it's basically one of those things at this point in time and likely forever being out of my control. Not much I can do bout it
Colton /soc thread detected!
In it, he bump spams to oblivion, brings attention to his kf thread, and has a slapfight with an 18 year old girl who tries calling him out on his antics.
Source (A)
The screenshots are just a small cut of the thread, mostly highlighting the slapfight.
It is now day 11,004 of not having a goth gf. Keep coping, seething, and dilating for us, a MAN duh Lochmann. You will never be a woman, nor will you ever have a cis lesbian goth gf.
I need to know why he's looking for a DOMMY MOMMY goth gf when in every dating profile and attempt he mentioned that he's "dominant" I'm starting to think he doesn't know what that word means.
I need to know why he's looking for a DOMMY MOMMY goth gf when in every dating profile and attempt he mentioned that he's "dominant" I'm starting to think he doesn't know what that word means.
I didn't realize Colton had ever stopped looking for an obese bitch in black makeup to peg him in the ass. I just assumed it was an every day thing that he has committed to doing before he inevitably kills himself.
. Either way it could be a win cuz I live in their head rent free when they honestly got better things to do or worry bout than focusing on whatever the hell I'm up to.
