That sucks, but non the less having 0 male figure to emulate as a male in teens obviously fucked you up. I feel bad for your mother, but you really need your shit together, it's probably why you are so into Britney Spears, wanting to know how to dance/suck cock good enough to attract a man, despite knowing 95% of men won't bother with gays. Hell even most gays I know sound independent, you sound like you are barely able to emotionally keep shit together in day to day life. What little masculinity you have is the maturity of a rambunctious 12 year old, if that, and it's sad.
You are addicted to cock because that's the only way you can conceptualize men. Male socialization SHOULD be being taught, learning, toughening up, till you become a peer. You never did that and thought acting like a woman (your mother) would fix it.