Stephanie Cianfriglia / Sapphire Crimson Claw / Yarrow Brown / the-ghost-fucker / transmascdruid / anarchoenby77 / darktwistedpussy / Druid of Endicot - Xe/xyr ghost-fucker, womb wizard, hand sanitizer sommelier, trans-boomer, violently abuses her elderly parents, has sexual fantasies about raping children

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Runes still backwards. How is she this retarded?
 
Runes still backwards. How is she this retarded?
Her camera is always mirrored when she has it pointed at herself, so I don't know if that's the reason. Even if the runes were the right way round in reality, she still looks like a silly nana, because she hasn't learned how to turn the mirroring off.
ETA:
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No shit. Yeah, sure, blame it on Loki. Would have loved for her to tell the fire department that.
 
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Dear God, I think she's packing on the pounds. Her face is a full potato now with that little scragglechin just aimlessly adrift.

Also, yet again the super nature cedarboxy can't be arsed to go outside and sit under a tree? Even for those of us not playing druid, it seems like it would be common decency to the neighbors if you're going to be banging a drum and marbling. I don't care if its raining (idk if that was her reasoning or not), go outside. I am begging you to touch grass instead of children.
 
Her camera is always mirrored when she has it pointed at herself, so I don't know if that's the reason. Even if the runes were the right way round in reality, she still looks like a silly nana, because she hasn't learned how to turn the mirroring off.
ETA:
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No shit. Yeah, sure, blame it on Loki. Would have loved for her to tell the fire department that.
It looks correct with the mirroring, which is what makes it hilarious. Every time the runes look correct I then notice her T-shirt lettering is backwards. 🤣
 
And check your preconceived notions, because could you possibly have expected the author would look anything like this?
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Enfys J. Book (they/them)
I see why she has the rainbow glasses and magenta splat in her hair: that lady has the exact phenotype of a middle school administrator or a dental hygienist.
Staph is LIVE. Doing a ritual inside, using a pizza box altar on her upholstered sofa.
That looks like a shipping box--the proportions are wrong for a pizza box, and there's no food staining.

I don't understand how the cardboard box-on-upholstered-chair altar is one of her blind spots. I get that she has some postproduction in her head that makes her see herself as the most attractive person on the planet, and that's why she doesn't do hygiene, experiment with her hairstyle, or learn how to apply makeup, (Not that Stephanie needs to apply makeup to be a valid whatever-she-is, but she clearly keeps trying to do it. Here she is with faded fingerpaint runes again, and globs of it used as eyeshadow as haphazardly as if you zoomed in on a Warhammer figure's face.)

But how do you not look at stuff thrown into a cardboard box and not think:
  • my visible laziness is dishonor to the (totally real) gods
  • fire hazard
  • this does not make me look like a powerful wizard whom the Internet should trust
Say that the chair is an integral part of her altar: fine, why not use a (sewing) pin to temporarily hang the patches on the back of the chair so they aren't crowding the altar? Or if she's set on using a box with a top, pin the patches and anything flat/decorative to the top of the box. It'll look better, be more obvious what gods and causes she's working with here, and then she can set up the horizontal part of the box with an eye to symmetry or just being less of a mess.

If she has to do a temporary chair altar so the camera can get those crucial up-the-gut shots, why not go to Goodwill and drop $5 on a metal serving tray? It immediately looks more put-together, plus way less likely to catch on fire.

Goodwill (etc) is also a good source of hinged wooden boxes, maybe an old silverware box or something. Half of the "portable altars" on Etsy are wooden boxes where you open the top to show off goddess pin-ups and the bottom has candle holders glued in. That wouldn't just jazz up her chair; she could take it with her for communing with the spirits on the municipal park bench, or yelling at normies in the town square.

Or here you go, this thing's ceramic (not even melamine) and it's at Target, 16" across and the Pride rainbow can help charge her JO crystal.
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Please note that this researcher typed the keyword "tray" and sorted by price low-to-high.

Stephanie has nothing but time and she's ghetto-rich; these disposable cardboard box altars would be an embarrassment to a tween going through her witchy phase. She doesn't even Magic Marker runes on the inside of the lid.
 
Damn, I was waiting for her to try to put it out, and I honestly wonder how she did that. Also, isn't incense supposed to smoulder, not become a small conflagration?
For her neighbors' sake, I hope this doesn't happen, but I was kind of hoping one of these experiments with a cardboard altar, an upholstered chair from the 70s, and open flame -- gets a little out of hand. Not in a way that really wrecks the place, but with enough smoke damage, setting off of smoke detectors all over the complex, panicked 911 calls, and the arrival of the local fire department sort of situation that brings the attention of the management to this shit she's doing(1). The fallout would be priceless. Hey, she wants to move, right?

(1) Not because an adult shouldn't be able to believe and/or practice whatever they want, no matter how bizarre, but because she has the mentality of a fucking toddler with matches and is genuinely endangering people, likely elderly and disabled people who can't really fend for themselves in an emergency.
 
I was kind of hoping one of these experiments with a cardboard altar, an upholstered chair from the 70s, and open flame -- gets a little out of hand.
Worshiping a god of chaos and betrayal, who's historically fire-aligned, with incense and tealights on a cushioned chair and a cat (whom you've named after the fire/betrayal god's wife) in the house.

Yeah, these events are really making me think Stephanie isn't talking to the gods and ghosts after all.
 
Oh wow. I've been on the fence about the FAS/autism thing till now, thinking: well, I did meet a LOT of oddballs on deviantart back in the day, maybe this is just what happens when someone stays terminally online (like, not just introverts who spend a lot of time online, capital T Terminally with no IRL social circle) through adulthood and has some degree of childhood adversity (adoption's rough psychologically, even when everything goes well).

But watching that live, man. She's got something certifiably wonky in her brain, like in a neurological kind of way. No adult with all their screws in place can post a video with that little self-awareness. Even putting aside the elephant in the room (no, not Steph, I mean the weird ritual), everything about the video screams childish - setting fire to the damn chair, the blobby facepaint, the long ass pauses! - it's like she doesn't have the ability to conceptualise that people will be watching this and perhaps she ought to have practiced so there aren't long periods of dead space. Even the way she's just carrying the phone around chatting to it like an old nana.

But yeah, the fire is actually concerning. That's an actual sign that she's not safe to live on her own. Maybe her folks finally heard about her neighbours stealing all her cash bennies and crashing drunk on her floor, and that's why they're moving her to a new building, to keep a closer eye on her. She actually does need a minder, though. I wish they'd put her in a group home or get her a live-in or something.
 
Oh wow. I've been on the fence about the FAS/autism thing till now, thinking: well, I did meet a LOT of oddballs on deviantart back in the day, maybe this is just what happens when someone stays terminally online (like, not just introverts who spend a lot of time online, capital T Terminally with no IRL social circle) through adulthood and has some degree of childhood adversity (adoption's rough psychologically, even when everything goes well).

But watching that live, man. She's got something certifiably wonky in her brain, like in a neurological kind of way. No adult with all their screws in place can post a video with that little self-awareness. Even putting aside the elephant in the room (no, not Steph, I mean the weird ritual), everything about the video screams childish - setting fire to the damn chair, the blobby facepaint, the long ass pauses! - it's like she doesn't have the ability to conceptualise that people will be watching this and perhaps she ought to have practiced so there aren't long periods of dead space. Even the way she's just carrying the phone around chatting to it like an old nana.

But yeah, the fire is actually concerning. That's an actual sign that she's not safe to live on her own. Maybe her folks finally heard about her neighbours stealing all her cash bennies and crashing drunk on her floor, and that's why they're moving her to a new building, to keep a closer eye on her. She actually does need a minder, though. I wish they'd put her in a group home or get her a live-in or something.
And yet she somehow managed to get a master's degree.
 
But yeah, the fire is actually concerning. That's an actual sign that she's not safe to live on her own. Maybe her folks finally heard about her neighbours stealing all her cash bennies and crashing drunk on her floor, and that's why they're moving her to a new building, to keep a closer eye on her. She actually does need a minder, though. I wish they'd put her in a group home or get her a live-in or something.
Now you have me wondering about cases like Staph where they're literate/online enough to know about gender shit, but their independence/life skills are non-existent, is there much of a demand for "trans friendly" services for the mentally disabled? Usually people who need that sort of thing don't even know what a pronoun is and a lot of care workers aren't native English speakers so I'd anticipate a lot of seething from our resident yarbler about how her wrangler misgendered her or she was thrown in an all female home.

I don't understand how the cardboard box-on-upholstered-chair altar is one of her blind spots. I get that she has some postproduction in her head that makes her see herself as the most attractive person on the planet, and that's why she doesn't do hygiene, experiment with her hairstyle, or learn how to apply makeup, (Not that Stephanie needs to apply makeup to be a valid whatever-she-is, but she clearly keeps trying to do it. Here she is with faded fingerpaint runes again, and globs of it used as eyeshadow as haphazardly as if you zoomed in on a Warhammer figure's face.)
You hit the nail on the head - the only work she puts into her appearance is making herself look like a kid playing pretend who got into their mother's makeup, the rest she expects everyone else to do by not mistaking her for an old nana on drugs and recognising her for the magical transbxy goblin she is. She might as well just wear an "ask me my pronouns" shirt wherever she goes, though even then there'd be plenty of people (the majority even) who choose to ignore it, like the overworked cashier at that gas station she always goes to for snacks being too tired to remember not to call her "ma'am" while she's grabbing an overpriced fizzy drink in the wee hours of the morning.

Also wish I knew what that patch propped up in the back of her "altar" box is meant to be - looks like a poorly rendered version of one of her countless Picrew avatars but that's probably not it. The hair is kiwi green - Lokiwi is that you?
 
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She has all fucking day - hell, all fucking month - to prepare for a ritual, but multiple times in that video she says she forgot something and takes far too long finding it, fucks up reading bits from books and forgets lyrics to the song, fumbles around trying to open a jar or digging in a bag of runes... She has zero self awareness to realise she looks like a bumbling and shit wizard. It's mindblowing how much she doesn't care about looking like a complete buffoon. She even pokes around in her pants on camera, no fucks given. Her rituals are so damn halfassed and boring. I initially zoned out and missed her butt scratching, but my friend noticed it and spent far too long trying to get the perfect cap of it on the replay lol.

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How I imagine this really went down:
> Trump supporter to supplier : Have you heard about the LA riots...?
> Staph waddles two metres away from them.
> Staph: The only thing I care about is you leaving me and my friends alone. Us trans people aren't hurting anyone. And we're not after kids!
> Trump supporter and supplier glance at Staph for 0.5 seconds.
> Supplier: I commend Trump for shaking things up.
> Staph walks away pleased with herself, despite them not hearing her.

Weird how she felt the need to mention that she's not after kids.

She shared some pictures of the back of her ritual robe on TikTok:
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'It's alright, it takes a lot of research' lol.
 
She has all fucking day - hell, all fucking month - to prepare for a ritual, but multiple times in that video she says she forgot something and takes far too long finding it, fucks up reading bits from books and forgets lyrics to the song, fumbles around trying to open a jar or digging in a bag of runes... She has zero self awareness to realise she looks like a bumbling and shit wizard. It's mindblowing how much she doesn't care about looking like a complete buffoon. She even pokes around in her pants on camera, no fucks given. Her rituals are so damn halfassed and boring. I initially zoned out and missed her butt scratching, but my friend noticed it and spent far too long trying to get the perfect cap of it on the replay lol.

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How I imagine this really went down:
> Trump supporter to supplier : Have you heard about the LA riots...?
> Staph waddles two metres away from them.
> Staph: The only thing I care about is you leaving me and my friends alone. Us trans people aren't hurting anyone. And we're not after kids!
> Trump supporter and supplier glance at Staph for 0.5 seconds.
> Supplier: I commend Trump for shaking things up.
> Staph walks away pleased with herself, despite them not hearing her.

Weird how she felt the need to mention that she's not after kids.

She shared some pictures of the back of her ritual robe on TikTok:
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'It's alright, it takes a lot of research' lol.
Those patches do look much better than her usual output. The red ones, particularly, have some pretty legible lines.

Maybe it's my googling, but it seems that vyshyvanky seems to be entirely the invention of Parlour of Wonders, who Steph buys her witch stuff from. Vyshyvanka is the iconic embroidered Ukrainian shirt, so possibly vyshyvanky are the motifs themselves? Although those seem to be mostly geometric and floral, nowadays. That being said, while I'm sure they have a lot of cultural significance, I don't think they're supposed to be magic runes.
 
'It's alright, it takes a lot of research' lol.
By her own admission she only recently got interested in Slavic folklore and everything she reads is sub pop-sci garbage, so no, it doesn't take much research.
While we're at it, "Icelandic magical staves" have nothing to do with Paganism, they're post medieval inventions by Christian mystics and late ones at that.
For example the one one the top left is some weird mix up between Vegvísir
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, and Ægishjálmur
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.
Ægishjálmur may have been known in the seventeenth-century, Vegvísirs earliest attestation is in 1860.
 
"Typically sewn into clothing," huh? So why aren't they? Picking up extra shifts at work? Busy caring for her elderly mom with cancer?

She promised one of her goddesses she'd learn to spin with a drop spindle, and that's nowhere in evidence. Seems like doing some running-stitch runes on her wizard robe would at least tell her spirit friends she's trying.


eta: perseverating, but this witchy person (archive) has made a portable multi-function "pocket altar" out of an Altoids tin and it's cute as heck, plus minimally flammable.
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In a world where magic were real, this is totally what my player character would keep in the pocket of her Kevlar-lined wizard robe.
 
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