Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

TDS free but plenty of TES. He even has his mouth all ready to go for orange dick

 

[densedance]

What the fuck is the distribution of that smoked Paprika?

 

[Tiresome]

What the fuck is the distribution of that smoked Paprika?

View attachment 7567302

It's the exact same stroke-cripple gimp-brained culinary instincts that make him throw seven un-separated slices of pepperoni down on an alien prop from original Star Trek before his bottom-wiping mommy stops the camera and helps him be slightly less obvious of an ungodly failure at everything.

 

[Helvítis Túristi]

Jack is no longer doing 'viewer mail' because, yeah, he functionally turned off comments. Recipe is whatever.

Oh wow, he's actually using other words to describe his food other than just "gud". Still pretty retarded descriptions though.

 

[AnOminous]

This man is still pissed about Starbucks

Stroke out, Jack. Do it for the last time, you evil fuck.

 

[woduqu]

I'm no professional chef, but when you're baking meat in an oven, isn't this nonsensical for instructions? Jack wants you to to pick a random oven temperature (he doesn't even suggest one) and then pop the tray out every, uh, few minutes or something to see the internal temp of the meat with a handheld thermometer. And then once it hits 160, you're supposed to add sauce and, as before, not cook it 5 more minutes, but 5 more degrees.

Also, this is a man who has been a "chef" for 30 years and says things like "Chicken thighs could take... 20 minutes... 30 minutes... I don't know." and "Watch it carefully if it's thighs. Chicken breast takes longer." even though chicken breast being virtually fat free means it's prone to turning out extremely dry if you don't watch it carefully. Of course, as someone who habitually undercooks meat, he may not have experience that outcome before.

 

[Adamska]

Also, this is a man who has been a "chef" for 30 years and says things like "Chicken thighs could take... 20 minutes... 30 minutes... I don't know." and "Watch it carefully if it's thighs. Chicken breast takes longer." even though chicken breast being virtually fat free means it's prone to turning out extremely dry if you don't watch it carefully. Of course, as someone who habitually undercooks meat, he may not have experience that outcome before.

In my experience thighs take a bit longer than breasts do. I tend to rule of thumb between 25-35 minutes for a baked chicken breast, though I tend to baste in a bit of butter on both sides to help keep moisture in. I also tend to cook at about 350 or sometimes a bit lower to control the rate more effectively.

By the by, he gurgles about how you either sauce but don't season, or vice versa. In reality it depends on the dish, a sauce being baked on like a bastard barbecue should still have the cuts salted down and pepper on it, since it ensures there's at least the rounded flavor profile. You don't necessarily need to sauce if you round out chicken with a good dry rub, but you can if you want to keep it hydrated.

Either way fat retard intentionally picked a spicy option with sriracha to eat all six thighs.

 

[Tiresome]

I love how every time Jack comes out with a new actual cooking video, he never demonstrates the slightest hint that he has ever learned anything in his eighteen and a half years of cooking in front of a camera. We can point out everything Jack does wrong all the livelong day but literally the number of things he ever gets right, in total, can fit comfortably on the back of a Post-It note.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

I love how every time Jack comes out with a new actual cooking video, he never demonstrates the slightest hint that he has ever learned anything in his eighteen and a half years of cooking in front of a camera. We can point out everything Jack does wrong all the livelong day but literally the number of things he ever gets right, in total, can fit comfortably on the back of a Post-It note.

This applies to almost anything Jack has done since this man doesn't know how to use social media well and youtube yet has the gall to lecture others on how to give good advice.

Hell the fact he fucks up basic recipes that even a middle schooler could get right is enough to discredit him.

 

[Tiresome]

This applies to almost anything Jack has done since this man doesn't know how to use social media well and youtube yet has the gall to lecture others on how to give good advice.

Hell the fact he fucks up basic recipes that even a middle schooler could get right is enough to discredit him.

Don't forget the fact that the last actual paying job he held down, decades and decades ago, the overnight DJ gig, he was fired from because he refused to simply play the shit in the station's library and put on his own music. It should be illegal to be this utterly useless of a human being.

 

[Hot CILF in your area]

What the fuck is the distribution of that smoked Paprika?

View attachment 7567302

@A Big Bumbling Black Man uploaded a very funny short video that summarizes Jack's seasoning skills very succinctly. If there ever is any question regarding as to his seasoning skills, simply view the attached material.

Edited for spelling.

I'm pretty sure I posted this already a while back, but it's just too good forgive me please.

 

[Slavic Patronym]

Don't forget the fact that the last actual paying job he held down, decades and decades ago, the overnight DJ gig, he was fired from because he refused to simply play the shit in the station's library and put on his own music. It should be illegal to be this utterly useless of a human being.

Is this separate from the gig he allegedly lost due to making fun of The Mighty Ducks on air, since Disney made that movie and was also a sponsor of the station? Or is that just lies and cope he invented around this same firing?

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Don't forget the fact that the last actual paying job he held down, decades and decades ago, the overnight DJ gig, he was fired from because he refused to simply play the shit in the station's library and put on his own music. It should be illegal to be this utterly useless of a human being.

Given Jack's taste in music I want to imagine that the nightclub where these people want to dance and rave had to hear this fucking baby music

 

[AnOminous]

I love how every time Jack comes out with a new actual cooking video, he never demonstrates the slightest hint that he has ever learned anything in his eighteen and a half years of cooking in front of a camera. We can point out everything Jack does wrong all the livelong day but literally the number of things he ever gets right, in total, can fit comfortably on the back of a Post-It note.

You can tell what Jack does right by watching an August the Cuck video because that retard somehow laser focuses for mockery on the rare things he does do right.

 

[Tiresome]

Is this separate from the gig he allegedly lost due to making fun of The Mighty Ducks on air, since Disney made that movie and was also a sponsor of the station? Or is that just lies and cope he invented around this same firing?

Given that the former story reflects badly on Jack and the latter suits his Victimhood Complex perfectly and also makes little sense, you can bet which is which.

 

[Enig]

View attachment 7568010
I'm no professional chef, but when you're baking meat in an oven, isn't this nonsensical for instructions? Jack wants you to to pick a random oven temperature (he doesn't even suggest one) and then pop the tray out every, uh, few minutes or something to see the internal temp of the meat with a handheld thermometer. And then once it hits 160, you're supposed to add sauce and, as before, not cook it 5 more minutes, but 5 more degrees.

Also, this is a man who has been a "chef" for 30 years and says things like "Chicken thighs could take... 20 minutes... 30 minutes... I don't know." and "Watch it carefully if it's thighs. Chicken breast takes longer." even though chicken breast being virtually fat free means it's prone to turning out extremely dry if you don't watch it carefully. Of course, as someone who habitually undercooks meat, he may not have experience that outcome before.

His mind is melted enough now he is now visibly confusing words and making things worse by copying and pasting the already incorrect lines while being the video editor, he likely meant to say “minutes” but crossed multiple mental tracks and mixed it up with the cooking temperature.

 

[densedance]

@A Big Bumbling Black Man uploaded a very funny short video that summarizes Jack's seasoning skills very succinctly. If there ever is any question regarding as to his seasoning skills, simply view the attached material.

Edited for spelling.

I'm pretty sure I posted this already a while back, but it's just too good forgive me please.
View attachment 7569697

Every time I watch this guy, I am stunned at his lack of basic understanding of the fundamentals. This is a grown-ass man making food that the poorest of college students could do a better job at. I'd be mad if I wasn't so horrified. I mean fuck me, I don't expect him to become a top Chef in Switzerland for example. But how can you fuck up everything genuinely over all those years. It's like he is fully engaged in his narcisstic bubble he lives in.

 

[AnOminous]

Every time you look at this fucking idiot you should remember he is a stroked out goddamn retard and nothing he says is ever above the level of full retard.

 

[Pig Cups]

Each of Jack's catastrophic health problems results from continuing to eat like a Flintstones garbage disposal after his most recent catastrophic health problem, which resulted from continuing to eat like a garbage disposal after the previous one, etc.

Please stop disparaging my garbage disposal. It enjoys a steady diet of peelings, tops/bottoms, skins, and leaves from many fruits and vegetables.

Ergo, my garbage disposal has a *much* healthier diet than Jack. Show some respect.

It's why I expect him to "accidentally" sit on the baby.

I wonder what kind of excuses Jack would use when his family discovers the body and they (justifiably) lose their shit?

 

[northamericanape]

Is there a reason Jack has some shitty fundraiser attached to all of his videos for the past year? It's barely raised any money and he never talks about it.