Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 18 1.3%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.5%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.7%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 3.2%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 18.7%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 194 14.0%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 785 56.8%

  • Total voters
    1,382
Everyone wish HamTam a Happy Birthday! Below is what Jack posted along with a couple of these horrifying photos.

"I love my wife Tammy Flanders Scalfani so much it hurts. She is the reason I am anything. Can’t imagine life without her. Growing old with her is like winning the lottery. I wish you a beautiful birthday today. Happy Birthday honey. May God bless your steps in life and may I stand by you for support. She makes beautiful children, too."

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The Wendigo hungers.
Everyone wish HamTam a Happy Birthday! Below is what Jack posted along with a couple of these horrifying photos.

"I love my wife Tammy Flanders Scalfani so much it hurts. She is the reason I am anything. Can’t imagine life without her. Growing old with her is like winning the lottery. I wish you a beautiful birthday today. Happy Birthday honey. May God bless your steps in life and may I stand by you for support. She makes beautiful children, too."

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They look like a special needs couple. You know the type. Two speds that met in a group home and wind up together because they're all they have.

But this almost sycophantic "love" he has for Hammy seriously feels like performance art. I mean I love my wife and she's awesome but I would never gush this much about her in public as if trying to convince others that she's truly "the one".
 
I suspect that fatty mistook the baby for a twinkie and devoured it
It's tempting to cite the Goya painting for the bestial nature of Saturn, but Goya paints him with a look of fear and almost-understanding. Plus he's using both arms to hold the baby.

Go with Peter Paul Rubens instead.
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One-armed carry; m e a t
 
"I love my wife Tammy Flanders Scalfani so much it hurts. She is the reason I am anything. Can’t imagine life without her. Growing old with her is like winning the lottery. I wish you a beautiful birthday today. Happy Birthday honey. May God bless your steps in life and may I stand by you for support. She makes beautiful children, too."

I'm a Jack "hater" too, but I try to avoid falling into "hater" type thinking where everything, no matter how innocent, has to be construed in the worst possible light. I really don't see anything wrong with this message. I think it's actually sweet and thoughtfully written. And, even if Jack is retarded, I'm sure he's not so retarded as to be ignorant of the fact that she probably is the best thing in his life and an angel for sticking with him.
 
I'm a Jack "hater" too, but I try to avoid falling into "hater" type thinking where everything, no matter how innocent, has to be construed in the worst possible light. I really don't see anything wrong with this message. I think it's actually sweet and thoughtfully written. And, even if Jack is retarded, I'm sure he's not so retarded as to be ignorant of the fact that she probably is the best thing in his life and an angel for sticking with him.
Fat faggot probably had chatgpt or something write it for him. He's a retard that treats his "angel" like shit.
 
Fat faggot probably had chatgpt or something write it for him. He's a retard that treats his "angel" like shit.
This is what I mean. If there is nothing wrong with it, then it must be written by AI, right? Except, it's clearly not that well written. Consider: "I wish you a beautiful birthday today. Happy Birthday honey." It's pretty redundant saying you wish someone a happy birth and then immediately saying "happy birthday" after that. Also, while it's not grammatically incorrect, "birthday today" is kind of weird phrasing and redundant sounding too.
 
Or maybe because of how there are literal years, decades actually, of prior datapoints and references to use to make predictions on Jack's motives and reasonings that the more likely option is the case. Using those prior events would posit that post as an attempt to performatively pretend he cares for anyone beyond what benefits him. As evident with his brother Jim, who Jack seems to only reference or mention when he needed something. Like getting his sauce into stores... twice. Or when he needed a guest or wanted to have all three brothers on a show.

Or how he would make posts like that typically after something that particularly tried her patience or due to obligation and social expectations occured, which given that the last video was demanding she eat all the Popeyes I'd count as both. After all, it's evident that he does intentionally spice food that allegedly is for family in ways that she can't eat it.

But then I'm just assuming contrarian-posting here.
 
Most people would say "I stand by to support you" but the way Jack phrased it is like he's reminding her she needs to support her man-baby husband on her birthday. Regardless, Jack cannot stand at all :story:
He probably got into a little angy bitch fight with her after filming the Popeyes sauce thing for liking the wrong sauces or liking them in the wrong order.

Jack is definitely a “stop liking what I don’t like” type of asshole.

Then he realized he had to go all love bomb on Tammy when she wouldn’t come wipe his ass.
 
I have zero problems believing Jack relied on an AI to write as personal and supposedly heartfelt a message such as a birthday greeting to his wife and soulmate, because Jack is easily one of those low-effort retards who abrogates all use of their own brain to chatbots because it's simply easier. Usually it's the newer generation that seems to more willingly do so but Jack has never been either intelligent enough to string five words together successfully nor hardworking enough to make an actual effort at...anything. Now whether he did or not, who cares. He's a bad enough person TO do it and I think that's something everyone can agree on.
 
It's as simple as chest thrusts. That's why it's so important to have a few bariatric manikins at a CPR class.
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I'd just look at that, or any human that looked like that, and decide I'm not going to waste a Heimlich on something that looks like that. It's just time for that thing to die.
I really don't see anything wrong with this message. I think it's actually sweet and thoughtfully written.
I think it's just yet another moment Jack realizes his latest domestic stupidity might cause Tammy to give him the pillow cure he desperately needs, and he knows he has to save himself with some desperate act of obeisance.

Call me uncharitable.
 
I'm a Jack "hater" too, but I try to avoid falling into "hater" type thinking where everything, no matter how innocent, has to be construed in the worst possible light. I really don't see anything wrong with this message. I think it's actually sweet and thoughtfully written. And, even if Jack is retarded, I'm sure he's not so retarded as to be ignorant of the fact that she probably is the best thing in his life and an angel for sticking with him.
The reason why people mock posts like this one from Jack is because there is an element of fakery to it. Jack has been shown to routinely mistreat people around him. Including his wife. How many times has he been shown arguing with her behind the scenes of a video and berating her? He constantly displays this mean-spirited personality on social media. He choked his own son over weed. He lashed out at church goers because they wouldn't help him rig a meaningless chili cook-off contest.

This type of social media post from Jack is just his bullshit way of trying to dupe people online that he is in a happy, loving relationship. In reality he only cares about her as far as what she can do for him. And even then despite financially supporting his lazy ass over the years and helping him take care of his deteriorating state that he brought on with his own self-destructive behavior, Jack still decides to treat her like shit because that is how he treats everyone in life.
 
He lashed out at church goers because they wouldn't help him rig a meaningless chili cook-off contest.
And this is after he made "chili" with brisket frozen for over a year that had to have tasted like absolute shit. Yet this entitled scumbag thought he somehow deserved to win against people who didn't use literal garbage as ingredients.
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God I hate that repulsive AI slop of that kid. It looks disgusting.
 
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