Opinion The Gen Z stare isn’t rude. We’re just not going to conform for your comfort. - Our communication style was shaped by character limits, subtweets, and voice memos sent from bed. We learned to be blunt and concise because that is what the world we’ve grown up in demanded, writes Valentina Botero

https://www.the-independent.com/life-style/gen-z-stare-etiquette-rude-b2793153.html
https://archive.ph/vFs3l
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Gen Z is stuck in the middle of what some older generations are calling an etiquette crisis, and now the spotlight is on our cold, dead-eyed “Gen Z stare.”

If you haven’t encountered the stare or the manufactured media outrage about it, the Gen Z stare is a blank, unbothered expression that older generations find terrifying.

Naturally, Gen Z pushed back, especially those working in the food service industry, who are often most accused of doing it.

One pizza shop employee summed it up perfectly: “You just asked me if we sell pizza.” A coffee shop worker recalled a customer asking her to explain the difference between iced and hot.

Of course we're going to stare. What is there to say when you’re being asked inane questions while earning minimum wage?

What older generations consider rude is what Gen Z sees as honest and efficient. We grew up (chronically) online. I graduated college in December 2020, started a fellowship on Zoom from my parents’ house, and didn’t set foot in an office until I moved to New York in 2022. I still haven’t worked five full days in person.
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Our communication style was shaped by character limits, subtweets, and voice memos sent from bed. We learned to be blunt and concise because that is how the world we’ve grown up in demanded.

That’s reflected in how we show up to work. According to a 2024 Stanford report, Gen Z is “pragmatic” and we “value direct communication, authenticity and relevance.” Sometimes that means less small talk and more clear, precise communication.

“Which is a hard thing for older generations,” executive leadership coach Dr. Carol Parker Walsh, who works with generational workplace issues, explained, “because they were trained not to be honest and authentic, but just to adapt to whatever the workplace norms were.”

Take hierarchy, for example. It’s not that we're anti-leadership; we’re just not as impressed by titles. As Walsh noted, many of us weren’t raised with an emphasis on winners and losers. Everyone was seen as equals (yes, even if that means a participation award for all).

Combine that with growing up exposed to global issues — racial injustice, wealth inequality and climate change — and it makes sense that Gen Z views power dynamics differently. We’ll talk to the president of the organization the same way we’d talk to the maintenance staff. It’s not out of disrespect — quite the opposite, because we don’t see status as a reason to change our tone.
We’re also not interested in the performative hustle culture. With that blunt rejection, Gen Z killed the millennial fever dream ignited by Sophia Amoruso’s 2014 memoir #GIRLBOSS. Only 6% of Gen Z professionals aim for executive roles, according to Deloitte. Why? Because climbing up the corporate ladder isn’t worth the burnout, particularly with the economy and government putting so many workers at risk of layoffs.

We have different belief systems, and that’s where the tension lies. But we didn’t just appear out of nowhere. We were shaped by the society now critiquing us.

“When we tell our children: ‘You’re amazing, everything's possible, go after what you want,’” Walsh said, “I often say to older generations: if you want to point a finger, bring it back home.”

Still, as Walsh notes, even good change makes people uncomfortable. Gen Z shouldn’t have to conform to outdated norms, but we do need to recognize that transformation takes time. And for older generations, the answer isn’t trying to mold us into what was. Instead it’s about improving communication, embracing discomfort, and creating workplaces that reflect the people in them.

But the etiquette dilemma doesn’t stop with Gen Z and a shift in mindset may be already happening. Recent spikes in Google search show that people are specifically looking for answers on what’s considered rude with an increase in queries like “Is it rude to ask how someone died?”, “Is it rude to leave someone on read?” and “Is it rude to point?” — showing that everyone is questioning unclear social norms.

Perhaps Gen Z is shaking up the workplace. But if the cracks bother you, maybe the foundation wasn’t strong enough.

Author:
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Hey there. My name is Valentina Botero. I’m an audience journalist that specializes in social media management and community engagement.​

I was introduced to journalism from a young age, and since then I have worked to make the content I create accessible to all communities. As an intern and a fellow at the Tampa Bay Times, I spent my time creating Spanish content to reach our Latinx/ Hispanic community on different topics. Now, I am an assistant audience editor at the Independent, a UK-based online newspaper. In this audience-driven role, I manage social accounts, boost articles by using SEO and advise teams across the newsroom on social strategy best practices.
 
Excellent, so we've fully transitioned to shitting on Zoomers. God these generation wars are so fucking retarded. They always were retarded. Xers and Boomers shit on Millennials, the Greatest shit on the Boomers for being hippies, the Boomers shit on the Xers, all the way back to, no shit, 5,000 BC when some dude scrawled on a mud tablet with a stick and said "the younger generation is so lazy, nobody wants to hunt or farm anymore, they all want to write books. They will be our destruction."

It's actually impressive how literally every generation falls into the retard trap.
 
It's actually impressive how literally every generation falls into the retard trap.
That or humanity really has been getting ever worse since first appearing. Like how ancient people used to think things have been declining since some far bygone Golden Age.

:thinking:

(But seriously I don't think that's necessarily the case.)
 
There have been unprecedented technological trends that "Boomers" and "Generation X" and at least older "Millennials" didn't have to deal with growing up though. Also, there really is more fixation on and division of generation these days. IIRC I didn't really hear about generational labels until sometime after 2010 so it's a Current Year thing?
I do remember hearing about some form of generational divide in the late 2000s, but yeah it does seem like it gained a whole head of steam in the 2010s.
Though I find generational debates dumb, considering the only named generations go back to the early 1900s.
 
That or humanity really has been getting ever worse since first appearing. Like how ancient people used to think things have been declining since some far bygone Golden Age.

:thinking:

(But seriously I don't think that's necessarily the case.)
Every generation imagines that they had it tougher, they worked harder, the politicians were more honest, so on and so forth, when it has always been this way. Every generation shits on those under them, because most people are retarded pieces of shit that become jaded cunts and refuse to empathize with those younger than them, that refuse to connect or understand them, they do this despite the fact that any failings teens and twenty-somethings have is their fault. Why would I shit on Zoomers and Alphas wholesale? Those are my kids, I raised them. I fucking love my kids, they're smart, they're polite, they stand up for each other and themselves. They have their own culture separate from mine just like I had a culture different from my parents twenty-five years ago, but why would I give a shit if they're doing the right thing? We had our own slang, we had our own ways of doing things, and somehow it was okay when we did it but when our kids do it they're broken? They're the reason "America is cooked?" It's not the pedophiles in government? It's actually the twenty-three year old gas station attendant that can't be fucked to pretend he gives a shit about you? Christ man.

I have a feeling that there's more than one person in this thread who is lashing out at this article because their kid is a disrespectful fuckup because they couldn't be fucked to hug them and spend time with them, and instead let television and the Internet do the child rearing. Any failings of Zoomers and Alphas are our fault. They are paying for the sins of the father. If you're pissed at this, maybe take a look in the mirror and ask yourself why you're a shit dad, and why so many of our generation turned out such shitty fucking kids.
 
I have a feeling that there's more than one person in this thread who is lashing out at this article because their kid is a disrespectful fuckup because they couldn't be fucked to hug them and spend time with them, and instead let television and the Internet do the child rearing. Any failings of Zoomers and Alphas are our fault. They are paying for the sins of the father. If you're pissed at this, maybe take a look in the mirror and ask yourself why you're a shit dad, and why so many of our generation turned out such shitty fucking kids.
You’re like an ornery Mr. Rogers lol
 
It could be that the overall states of people with a certain generation could go up and down over time. So for example, it really could be that the "Millennials" are overall more freakish than "Generation X", and "Zoomers" are overall more freakish than the "Millennials" (which could be because "social media" on "smartphones", as well as "social justice" BS). But then again, the older generations could have more problems in other areas. So if a generation is worse off overall than a previous, it may be just overall.

In other words, what I'm saying is I do not think "every new generation is always getting worse", but nor do I think "every generation is the same as the one before" either.
 
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Excellent, so we've fully transitioned to shitting on Zoomers. God these generation wars are so fucking retarded. They always were retarded. Xers and Boomers shit on Millennials, the Greatest shit on the Boomers for being hippies, the Boomers shit on the Xers, all the way back to, no shit, 5,000 BC when some dude scrawled on a mud tablet with a stick and said "the younger generation is so lazy, nobody wants to hunt or farm anymore, they all want to write books. They will be our destruction."

It's actually impressive how literally every generation falls into the retard trap.
The problems that Zoomers have are no fault of their own, which is why I (try) not to shit on them. The over reliance on technology was forced on them, and the over-simplification of it made them ignorant to how it works.

Example: the early days of social media (LiveJournal, MySpace) required some knowledge of HTML to costumize your page.

I'm a Millenial, and having 24/7 access to the internet, or a computer, wasn't necessary to complete work assignments.

The COVID hoax robbed many of them of their childhood.

They grown up in the middle of a cultural death spiral where reading is practically discouraged, and all media is perfectly curated to their specific tastes.

Another example: Most people watched the same shows 20 years ago. TV is stupid, I know, but two entirely different people who have nothing in common, but they did watch last night's episode of Chappelle, and would have that connection. That sort of thing is gone now. It doesn't help the every show or movie is capeshit or reboot slop where everything is part of some "cinematic universe."

Zoomers also came of age where thrir personality, or having human reactions and/or moments is diagnosed as a mental disorder. Something that must be cured. A boy that rather run around outside, or do things with his hands instead of sitting still in a desk for 8 hours a day? ADHD, dope him up! A 13 year old girl who feels awkward in her changing body? She's trans, give her puberty blockers and cut off her tits!
 
Imagine a generation of psychopaths--oh, wait, right. We don't need to imagine. Here they are.
Maybe... But what I see are People who are prey to the strong. As we like to say... The Dog... Must Hunt...

The Strong make the Rules...
The Weak Do Not...
And the Dead Don't...

So... Cry Havoc and Unleash the Dogs of War!!!
And Devour those who are Weak of Will!!!
 
Sums it up. If you feel like looking at customers like they're retarded because they ask retarded questions, I understand the motive, but you've got to know what you're setting yourself up for.
I went to college for journalism. I was going to tell the truth. I was going to be the stone of fucking truth.

While I was away having my hopes crushed my sister destroyed my car. She basically stole my home.

I ended up walking a mile and a half each way to wait tables at a shitty diner. That is where I really learned to work people. Once I could afford a shitty used car I kept that job and delivered pizza.

I worked myself up from the bottom in a hick town to a tech start up in NYC.

When I realized that was going nowhere I moved on.

Most people have no idea what it is to work. If I had to walk two miles to feed my family because my business fails I would...they will not leave their fucking bedroom.

Fuck them.
 
Maybe... But what I see are People who are prey to the strong. As we like to say... The Dog... Must Hunt...

The Strong make the Rules...
The Weak Do Not...
And the Dead Don't...

So... Cry Havoc and Unleash the Dogs of War!!!
And Devour those who are Weak of Will!!!
I had to go to the ER after reading this. Nearly bled out.
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That or humanity really has been getting ever worse since first appearing. Like how ancient people used to think things have been declining since some far bygone Golden Age.
Those people are probably correct, society does get worse until it reaches some critical point where everything implodes, then it rebounds higher before slowly turning to shit again.
 
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