- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
Stahp. It's your Saturday; go walk outside for 6.5 minutes. You can walk and look at things online at the same time if need be.
Skitzocow Forsaken Wanderer / Forsaken Wanderer Project / ThyForsakenWanderer / Degeneratemooty2389 / @100% VIRGIN MOOTY / @Mooty Mooty Mooty - 34 Year-Old 5'4 Schizophrenic Autistic VIRGIN Halal'd User with over 400 YouTube Videos: Black-pilled Alcohol abuser, thinks kiwi farms was taken over by the leftists, is the last white Kiwifarmer, thinks women are all children & it's the JEWS fault
- Thread starter Meiwaku
- Start date
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2022
It's almost 4pm it's getting quite cold. There is nowhere to walk to. It's too busy out there anyway. I'm going to close the curtains soon and try and relax.
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2025
Get out of your head and stop overthinking everything.
I have neurotic and schizo tendencies (and am a white man, if it matters) so I somewhat understand where you are coming from. And seriously, the best solution is realizing three things:
1) Not every thought is "you", if a thought is provoking a strong negative reaction in you, it is probably actual "demons" or other entities that thrive off provoking emotional reactions they can "feed" on. Dwelling on intrusive thoughts is what they want, because it is very debilitating to you.
2) You DO have the ability to focus your thoughts and control your inner world. Once you understand point #1 it becomes a lot easier to avoid overthinking and get out of your head.
3) Everyone has their own inner world and everyone controls it to varying levels of success. Not all, (but a lot of) personality disorders are caused or exacerbated when people fail to understand the above two points.
At the risk of sounding cliche, going outside and talking to people helps a lot. Yes, 99% of people are npc retards, but even small talk about the weather or good theme parks is helpful since it gets you out of your head. Learn to mentally compartmentalize stuff too, it helps somewhat. Then once you have control over that, read Jung and learn to reintegrate your 'shadow self' without going schizo again.
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2022
Hey Althalus
It does matter that you are a white man, so that you can understand the experience not just of having a faulty brain but the unique way in which our group is treated.
I'm not sure I understand any of those three things, is it all from Jung?
I can't stop overthinking things, and I can't get out of my head. I have anxiety about everything and I constantly feel miserable and stressed.
I have a million anxieties going on in my mind at once and the only thing that can quieten it is escapism (although it works less now and I have no time or energy for it).
I don't want to go outside and talk to people. I want to live somehow remote where I never have to deal with people ever again. Just peace and quiet. I can't stand NPCs.
Do you go outside and talk to people? Does it make you feel more 'hinged' ?
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2022
I don't usually dream (or remember them at least), but I do have ideas come into my mind during the day, and then it takes weeks for me to find the time to sit down and try to make them a reality. Then finally I can free up room in my brain for the next thing to appear.
Portents of a soothsayer
- Joined
- Nov 26, 2024
you can bypass this using https://github.com/zerodytrash/Simple-YouTube-Age-Restriction-BypassDon't we have enough Judaism in our lives? Our entire modern "culture" is Jewish.
I tried to watch the video but speaking of jews, they said no -
I did find a reupload and I have no idea what it is. It was tranny wrestling and robot noises?
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2025
It's true that whites, particularly white men, are not liked by the establishment these days. Especially if you are schizo or otherwise a "mental nonconformist". I'm not going to downplay that, but I will say that no one progresses if they always think of themselves as a victim. Even if one actually is a victim, having a perpetual victim mindset is not conducive to success. It's true for blacks, it's true for jews, and it's true for whites too.
#3 is Jung, #2 is basic psychological advice, #1 is believed by a variety of religions around the world.
I've been there, best way out is literally to stop thinking about it. Best way to stop thinking about inner problems is to create real outer "problems". E.g. get a full-time job and put your focus on that, instead of sitting in your house ruminating. I know I sound like a boomer here but it does help.
Learn to pray or meditate. Being able to control and quiet your thoughts is extremely useful.
Escapism works, escapism that involves interacting with other people works even more.
Also if you lack energy, quit using caffeine. Also go to bed at the same time every night. I know this also sounds like boomer advice, but you will have more energy when you are getting consistent sleep and aren't crashing from caffeine highs. A lot of my anxiety went away/lessened once I had more sleep and thus more energy during the day.
When you are tired is when the intrusive thoughts attack. Ignore everything that pops into your head after 9pm unless it's positive.
I 100% sympathize and if I was rich and didn't need to work I'd consider doing exactly that.
That said, the only way to get better at something is to practice it. If you want to get better at tolerating npcs you have to actually start doing it. Even if it's only for one hour a day, or something.
Yes, mostly at work, occasionally at bars.
Yes. It's not about having "deep" conversations as most people are npcs. My point is that everyone has anxieties and other things in their heads too, when you realize everyone has stuff in their heads it makes your problems easier to deal with because you can see other people dealing with them and getting on with life too.
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2022
i'll respond back soon but I have to say I fucking hate life. I don't do anything but work and chores. Everyone else gets to live their life but not me, I'll get to my death bed and all I'll be able to say is that I just worked worked worked worked worked, slaved away in the mines.
Fucking need help killing myself, I need it to end
Thanks slungus but it looks like youtube has already stopped the addin working, it tries to bypass and then fails
what do i do about the cistern plungers dripping water it's not a basic setup it's an incredibly complex one with no valve to turn off the water because anything modern is fucking retarded
fuck life i'm fucking done with this fucking bullshit now i have 5000000 chores to do before sunday finishes and i need to eat breakfast
i made this yesterday, took me the entire day because I only got to sit at the computer for 5 seconds at a time
Fucking need help killing myself, I need it to end
Thanks slungus but it looks like youtube has already stopped the addin working, it tries to bypass and then fails
what do i do about the cistern plungers dripping water it's not a basic setup it's an incredibly complex one with no valve to turn off the water because anything modern is fucking retarded
fuck life i'm fucking done with this fucking bullshit now i have 5000000 chores to do before sunday finishes and i need to eat breakfast
i made this yesterday, took me the entire day because I only got to sit at the computer for 5 seconds at a time
Attachments
- Joined
- May 15, 2020
This fucking rules, just as much as videos of Kirby being cute.
Its okay if it takes time. Don't hurt yourself by comparing yourself to others. You need compassion and patience for yourself and your own struggles.
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2022
Aw thanks grimace, that is very kind of you to say.
We all need compassion and patience for ourselves.
The problem is that we spend most of our weeks with a "working droid" hat on, and we aren't being ourselves are we?
Time is such a short and precious thing
@Althalus It's amazing that with Xenforo sites you can't click reply to posts that are more than a couple of paragraphs.
The problem is that all white groups are victims. We are victims of the most horrific atrocities the world has ever seen. Look back at the WWII period and the 10s of millions of whites killed by Jews via starvation, gulags, rapes and pillaging, fire bombing towns, and so on.
Now look at modern day and the amount of our people killed every day by invaders that are only in our countries because the Jews let them in.
Jew and blacks play the victim when they aren't. We actually are victims.
Now that is not to say that we sit around and be weak. We need to fight back, we need to take control of our own destiny again. It will be a very hard battle.
Does a fulltime job help you? I have a fulltime job and it's the cause of 95% of my problems in life. It's the cause of 95% of my negativity. I am an autist, I'm not designed for the working class life, it's killing me and I hate it. And I've been stuck here in this 5 day a week routine since at least 5 years old (5 day a week education, then 5 day a week working).
I don't really know how to meditate. I often listen to relaxing vidya music (as cringe as that sounds) as it's a nice background noise, I don't know if that counts as monkish.
I physically can only get about 5 hours sleep a night due to the lack of time I have to be able to sleep. There is no way to get more sleep and work full time.
Yeah man living somewhere peaceful and quiet, away from all the noise and troubles of the world, it's the dream that is out of our reach.
I get tired of NPC dialog. It's the same couple of things over and over again. I don't enjoy small talk at all. I just want to get to the point in a concise way.
The west in a single photo -
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2024
Makes me happy I live in the actual West, and not some former prison/Polynesian South Asian ocean island.
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
Wear the scarf I know you ordered.
Walk around the block. Or to the corner and back. I'm feeling bold so I'm going to promise no one is going to bother you if you go outside for 390 seconds.
Comments from @Althalus reminded me: Have you ever tried to shut out all the thoughts running through your mind and just...not think? I found, when I was a point of having constant rumination and thoughts everywhere, that learning how to train my mind to think of nothing but a white wall helped ramp down the noise. I still use the technique when my thoughts are rolling but not helpful - as in negative (which makes me feel worse and worse). I taught my kids to do this as well, and they (now) tell me it has helped them a lot.
And that is a form of meditation, or meditation-adjacent. Similarly, breath meditation is exceptionally simple - it involves breathing through your nose and practicing thinking of nothing but the air going in and out-focus on the air only. You practice not editorializing anything about the air, your nose, breathing in general, or anything else. Just the air in and out. Starting the practice can be surprising bc a person may realize they can't even take in a breath without the thoughts running to a million other places - like, how is it so hard just to think about air in and out for 3 seconds? That is a data point, though, not a failure. You do it again and again - and it's something you can do anywhere, anytime - and what happens is you get better and better at it. When your mind wanders, you bring it back to the sensation of the air through your nostrils. You don't have to be great at it. But you get better. And then it becomes something you can do to still thoughts when they get unruly or negative. And eventually you can do it for longer and longer. And that tunes your skills for getting some mastery over those thoughts - you get better at compartmentalizing rowdy, disruptive, misery-making thoughts. And the punchline is that that is a very valuable skill bc it gives you a little ledge for a toehold to be in a position to reach to the next handhold (sorry for the rock climbing metaphor). You also come to understand the destructiveness of those kinds of thoughts, as addictive and alluring as they can be.
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2022
Bro every western country is rapidly falling. You will soon have the same deposit boxes in your neighborhood just like you have affirmative action. Why is it verboten to say things are bleak?
@Friend of Dorothy Parker
Well this is awkward, I've not had time to order anything yet, I'm about to order some pants in a second hopefully because I'm in desperate need of the basics.
I am not dressed for going outside, I've got my clothes in the wash currently. And there is nothing to see outside.
White walls and breathing?
Does that work to picture something in your mind? I find if you think of breathing then you have to manually breath which is annoying, where as normally you do it without thinking (which is strange when you think about it, that we are always breathing because we have to, but most of the time we don't think about the fact that we are inhaling/exhaling
The thing is, all of the creatures that are constantly hounding me mentally and causing anxiety, they are things that I need to address or they will destroy me.
I am always balancing on a needle's edge. If one thing goes wrong then I am fucked.
Today I have a couple hours to order clothes, do the dishes, sort out rubbish etc, if I don't then I'm fucked. If I don't do dishes I won't have anything to eat or drink with. If I don't wash clothes I won't have anything to wear.
Then there are the issues that crop up. Like, the toilet plungers, why are they not sealing all the way? I think it might be a build up of filth that is in the water here (yellow stuff, might be iron?) but getting to the plungers is not something I have not figured out as of yet.
Then of course there is the constant mission of trying to get ready for work and to be able to work.
All of these things on my mind constantly, I'm being swamped, I can't keep up with everything I need to do, I can't keep up with all of the chores, can't keep the house from falling to bits, can't keep performance well at work, can't keep my remaining health, I'm rapidly falling to bits and the end is near; and when it does come it's going to be horrific...
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2021
No, no it's not, that's no end at all. It's oblivion you don't want it.
you got your house, cat, family and Kiwi friends, got to be worth something.
I got dragged to the Arboretum today and I felt 100% more hinged for it, even though it's like a unexciting zoo where all the exhibits are trees and dead rabbits and I got blisters from my shitty shoes.
Give Kirby my love
Not verboten to acknowledge when things are bleak. But giving up is verboten, you don't just give up the ship when the going gets tough. Not even the Chinese and the Koreans and the Japs do that, you're better than them too. Your kind stormed Normandy and did great.
I feel that TBH, but get the clothes. You will have a much easier time getting ready when there's clothes in the drawer. I went through this same thing postpartum, nothing fucking fit and I had to keep wearing maternity wear to cover my shame and i felt horrible. That got better when I got some clothes that fit me now rather than getting all bent out of shape that I didn't fit clothes I bought circa 2015. Getting some clothes that look nice is a boost you need.
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2024
All the more reason to start growing your own vegetables in your yard.
Retvrn to the land!
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
Lol, buy 2 pair. You should not be homebound because you're doing laundry. Don't set yourself up for failure. Do the opposite of that.
No, it's picturing nothing. A blank wall.
That's the point - to be mindful of a thing that doesn't require thinking to do. It's concentrating your attention on a thing you usually never notice and allowing yourself the freedom to have that as the only thing in your mind. Yes, it's awkward at first. But it can become a remarkably calming thing. Try it. Five, ten seconds a day for a week, then nudge yourself up a little.
Imagine not having thoughts running around telling you bad things.
This is exactly the sort of thing I'm talking about, what you need to learn to get some respite from. Learning to create a few minutes without those things racing around. It can surprisingly give some energy and with that the ability to sort out that jumble of things into a less overwhelming tidal wave. When you start doing that, the day-to-day slowly becomes less overwhelming and the doom thoughts become more able to be tamed.
You have more agency and power that you think and feel. But you have to stop saying "that won't work, that's weird, that's odd, I can't I can't, I can't, nothing helps.". Until you tell me that you've committed and spent to a year at a Buddhist monastery and came out exactly the same as going in, I don't believe that your situation is as intractable as you think. But do understand that this is primarily driven from your interior. Which means it is worth trying every last thing to get it under some measure of control and get yourself some relief.
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2022
What is the worth of anything if you have no time to enjoy it? When all I do is work and chores?
Kirby is asleep at the moment but I'll give him a cuddle later thank you.
What was meant to be in the exhibits? Rare birds? Invisible birds?
As an MLG level Isaac player you might appreciate these skills
My tribe were tricked into storming the beaches of Normandy to attack our cousin tribe, resulting in the needless deaths of countless white men. I wouldn't call that winning.
I've run out of moves to make, I'm just waiting to die at this point.
Postpartum? Why did you wait so long to get more clothes? Do you buy new clothes every year?
I need to yeah, we all do, but what do you do when 100 pakis come with machettes to try and take your vegetables?
@Friend of Dorothy Parker I just ordered some clothes, will see how it goes. I'm always without clothes to wear, so it makes life difficult.
I've not no time to go outside I've got to do the dishes and all that, very stressed as I've got very little time left of the day. 7 hours until I should be in bed.
I can't focus on one thing though, my mind is always wandering, I am always thinking about everything at once. The only way to lessen the noise is escapism, like putting on a video, something to distract myself.
I need a respite but I can't stop the stress. Right now I feel sick with anxiety because I have so much I must achieve in the next couple hours and also I don't know how to fix the cistern plungers and also it's work tomorrow
What do I do? I don't know what to do i'm so anxious.
It is the external factors. It's all of the endless issues I'm being smothered by. It's all the horrors. They are piling up. it's all too much for me to handle. I am going to fall very shortly it's about to happen. And then what?
Maybe it will mean I can finally pass on and rest
now dishes : (
I just want to die i just want it to be over just kill me i don't want to keep doing this routine i don't want to keep living the same week over and over and over and over and over
just kill me why am i living the same week over and over i have a headache
why can't anyone hear me, hello, it's the same 5 days of work from now until the end of time, hello i've done this for 30 years already, hello, i can't stand it, hello, i can't deal with it anymore, hello?! hello!!??? can anyone hear me!?!?
but it's just nothing, it's just a void of emptiness
nobody is really there
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2024
Become a master of the machete yourself and guard your crops.
Kiwisee
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2021
This maybe a little off topic, but @Forsaken Wanderer what are your thoughts on animation? More specifically, traditional vs CG or the state of western animation. I know you criticized modern anime in the past for looking extremely same-y (which I agree with).
While Disney Adults are cringe, I feel like the art of animation peaked in the golden age and renaissance era. Early 2000s Disney and Dreamworks had this interesting blend of 2D and 3D that has been lost.
Especially during the golden age of both cinema and traditional animation, we were given painted backgrounds which would be worthy of being displayed in museums.
I’m interested in hearing your point of view.
While Disney Adults are cringe, I feel like the art of animation peaked in the golden age and renaissance era. Early 2000s Disney and Dreamworks had this interesting blend of 2D and 3D that has been lost.
Especially during the golden age of both cinema and traditional animation, we were given painted backgrounds which would be worthy of being displayed in museums.
I’m interested in hearing your point of view.
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2021
I'm glad you did that! How long til they arrive?
My friend, this is exactly what I was talking about. "I can't I can't I can't " but you haven't really tried.I've not no time to go outside I've got to do the dishes and all that, very stressed as I've got very little time left of the day. 7 hours until I should be in bed.
I can't focus on one thing though, my mind is always wandering, I am always thinking about everything at once. The only way to lessen the noise is escapism, like putting on a video, something to distract myself.
I need a respite but I can't stop the stress. Right now I feel sick with anxiety because I have so much I must achieve in the next couple hours and also I don't know how to fix the cistern plungers and also it's work tomorrow
What do I do? I don't know what to do i'm so anxious.
It is the external factors. It's all of the endless issues I'm being smothered by. It's all the horrors. They are piling up. it's all too much for me to handle. I am going to fall very shortly it's about to happen. And then what?
Maybe it will mean I can finally pass on and rest
now dishes : (
I just want to die i just want it to be over just kill me i don't want to keep doing this routine i don't want to keep living the same week over and over and over and over and over
just kill me why am i living the same week over and over i have a headache
why can't anyone hear me, hello, it's the same 5 days of work from now until the end of time, hello i've done this for 30 years already, hello, i can't stand it, hello, i can't deal with it anymore, hello?! hello!!??? can anyone hear me!?!?
but it's just nothing, it's just a void of emptiness
nobody is really there
Of course you can't concentrate on one thing. That's what anxiety (and depression, and whatever else) does. Escapism is exactly what it is - distraction and avoidance. Useful occasionally but not as a lifestyle. It's your mind seeking relief and finding the quickest place to it. But it's not as hard as it seems to try a few seconds of something else. The things I described seem harder, and possibly useless, but they aren't. You don't have to give up the escapism; no one is saying that. But you've got 5-10 seconds a day to start trying something else. You have 30 seconds to walk to the road and back. You can wear pajama pants or wrap a towel around you for 30 seconds outside; no one will care, and who cares if they do.