- Joined
- Jun 2, 2024
In case anyone wondered how the F2Malding saga ended but didn't care to enter the Spergatory, I phonebooked him and confirmed he's a regular guy with no poonerish qualities and now he's deleted fucking everything as a result, thus confirming yet another successful home run for Team Pickle. (This is not to relitigate the topic; I'm only posting this for posterity as we all enjoy ourselves a good 'booking now and then.)
Funny, funny stuff! But that's enough about that crazy little guy - let's look at some other wasted genetic material for a refreshing change of pace, shall we?
Has anyone else been enjoying the uptick in literary lunacy as of late? I know I have been, so please find enclosed a very emotive, thought-provoking poem from a TiMMY who has some strange misconceptions about how blood disperses through pool water.
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F2MALDING / FTM_TO_MALDING / GENDER_GANACHE / GENDERGANACHE / LOVEWITHSPLENDA / WAYWARDYID / OBSOLETEANOMALY / TAL BAR-PELED
4520 7th Ave NE Apt G
Seattle, WA 98105
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4520 7th Ave NE Apt G
Seattle, WA 98105
Facebook 1 | Facebook 2
Clubhouse
Chess.com
Blogger
Last.FM
YouTube
Bluesky
Twitter 1 | Twitter 2 | Twitter 3
Old Reddit 1 | Old Reddit 2 | Old Reddit 3
TikTok
Snapchat
Substack
Has anyone else been enjoying the uptick in literary lunacy as of late? I know I have been, so please find enclosed a very emotive, thought-provoking poem from a TiMMY who has some strange misconceptions about how blood disperses through pool water.
Link | Archive
Though a man found purpose in love and the Lord, neither religion nor relationships have saved him from the sinister voice in the back of his head urging him to transition - and now that he's left alone, abandoned by both faith and the fairer sex, his only form of coping is imagining popular video game hunk Leon S. Kennedy holding him in a tender embrace.
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A TiF fears that the newly instated laws surrounding IDs in Kansas may impact her ability to take STP devices into the women's bathroom, which she appears to find especially egregious as an offense because she believes a piss funnel is somehow "part of a trans man's body." You could just use a cooking funnel if you want to stand to urinate so badly, OP, it's not as if they're very expensive.[Discussional Vent] I (20) am forcing myself to be cis but it is backfiring.
To give a quick TLDR: Used to be trans, detransitioned, thought I found myself, turns out I didn't, questioned, and hid it.
Full Explanation: I used to be trans about a year back but I detransitioned due to the fact I found a woman and faith in religion. I felt like I had found myself but she eventually left and things just started crumbling down from there. Now I don't know who I am, thought I did but I don't know now.I came to this reddit in the past talking about how I didn't know if I was really trans, the advice was great but I am a stubborn person, I continued to just keep being cisand not try to make any progress, and quite frankly its been very very draining.
Now after those explanations.Its been a few months since I've last been on this reddit, but also new problem has occurred. I am a big Resident Evil fan, and I am very much bi, but more leaning towards men. After playing RE9, I just can't stop thinking about Leon, I want to be cared for by a man like that, comforted, accepted, and especially validated.I just always put it in my mind that this is not much of a possible reality, I believe whole heartedly that I will never be able to be a girl I've always wanted to be.Anymore this whole situation has been depressing for me.
This was most definitely a vent but I don't want it to be treated like one, I want a discussion, to talk more about this and see other people's point of views and or feelings.What do you fellas think about my situation?Feel free to speak your mind, I am open to hearing opinions.
Much Love
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Oklahoma's attempt to pass OK SB1905 has this li'l dood in a major tizzy as she prepares to flee the state without even so much as her daughter's beloved toys in tow because she might not be able to roid up as she has grown accustomed to. Their attempts at emotionally manipulating their audience are usually pretty rank, but this one especially so. Really? You're going to use a child losing precious toys as a way to get people to keep approving of your hormonal self-destruction? Very shady!
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A self-described "gay farmhand turned Metropolitan sissy beta" "whiteboi virgin" who is an "ex-hentai addict," a "censored porn addict" and "BBC obsessed" wonders if perverts are ruining the public image of the LGBT or if it's actually anyone who disagrees with them. Do you ever read a profile and feel a yucky film on your eyes afterwards? That's how I felt reading this guy's post history.
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In common kiddie slang, "canon event" refers to a part of the plot in the animated film series Into the Spider-Verse which depicts its protagonist encountering numerous other versions of Spider-Man - each one completely separate from him, but Spider-Man nonetheless - who are all united by what is known as a "canon event," or a formative life experience that spurs them into vigilantism; so what OP means here when she asks this question of her fellow doodz is that she wants to know what events took place in their lives that pointed them towards the path of transition. Let's see what they have to say!
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[–]FakeBirdFacts
If I recount them this is going to get depressing real quick
I definitely wished for Breast Cancer
[–]boypussy127
the "im not like the other girls" phasei was, in fact, not like the other girls
also, wanting to be underweight so my body would be skinny enough to not have prominent curves and my chest flat
[–]MagicalGirl4
"Every girl has body issues so I'm totally normal for feeling this way about mine"
[–]spider_strawberry
Trying and failing to make a binder out of tights as a pre teen
[–]Okchamali_Vibin
Being obsessed with Mulan as a child
Not understanding why I can't take my shirt off to play in the sprinkler
Exclusively wearing high compression sports bras
My high school boyfriend and I calling each other the masculinized/feminized versions of our names
[–]throwaway9999-22222
i'M nOt LiKe oThEr GiRLs
[–]satonabug
i tried to bind my chest with duct tape when i was 15, prob not super common with young ppl now but i absolutely do not recommend.
[–]throwaway9999-22222
Jack Frost
[–]WWJackSparrowD
Watching that Catfish/catphish show with a friend. I thought to myself "hahaha wouldn't it be sooo funny to pretend to be a guy online... jk jk... unless..." and that was my second ever moment of gender euphoria.
I don't even remember why I thought it would have been funny anymore....
(First ever moment of gender euphoria was when I was in middle school and thrifted a nice argyle sweater but I don't think that counts lmao)
[–]FullPruneNight
Feeling so much strange quiet joy when my sister decided to ironically imitate dudebros and would call me dude, bro, man, son all the time
Absolutely loving when my friend’s older brother dressed us up in boy drag and gave us boy lessons to “keep us safe” the first time we were allowed to wander farther
Wrapping my chest with ace bandages for weeks when I broke some ribs (don’t, obviously)
“Not like other girls,” because y’know, I wasn’t
Loving Mulan, but absolutely sobbing to Reflection by myself in my closet
Getting to be a sort of girl-son
Weirdly, making my sister do made up dances with me. Even as a kid it felt GAY, not GIRL
Riding a cis man sans penetration and as I make him tell me his dick belongs to me
[–]Adventurous_Text6152
Trying to pee standing up as a kid and consequently pissing on the floor
[–]MockVervain
Multiple Halloweens saying “what if I just dress up like a man as convincingly as possible, good fake beard and all”
Wishing for ovarian cysts/cancer/other so I could get those things pulled out
I used to go to a woman’s only gym and on measuring days the trainers would always remark about how luck I was that my breasts weren’t shrinking. And trying not to say “well how do I get them to do that then?” was rather difficult.
Feeling disappointed when (honestly multiple) yoga instructors over the years have said “don’t worry this won’t give you ‘man arms’”
Obligatory Mulan and Joan d’Arc obsessions
[–]paprikahoernchen
The scariest moment in my life..
Trying on your first binder.
Getting stuck in it.
Accepting death.
And did anyone else ever played a boy on habbo hotel, just for fun?
[–]kai_likes_caffeine
I'm a psych major so I've touched on Sigmund Freud a lot (and oh boy is he something), but I distinctly remember in school when I was younger I learnt about Freuds penis envy when we covered his psychosexual stages. (For those who don't know what that is, Freud claimed that all young girls felt anxiety and deficiency upon realizing they lack a penis) and I thought that was completely normal and of course every "girl" experiences that. The day I learnt that no, infact that is not something everyone feels, shook younger me to my core lol
[–]homicidal_bird
Before I even realized I was trans- asking my parents to buy broccoli, almonds, and grapes because Tumblr said they were high in testosterone.
[–]Pigeon_Cult
Wearing only baggy hoodies all the time
[–]VillageInner8961
watching Mulan then getting an unhealthy obsession with the song Reflection
[–]hypernoble
omg I wished for it too
and then I had top surgery and I DID have breast cancer and I felt like a reeeeeal asshole
[–]TheElfPrince
"Oops I got breast cancer guess I’ll just have to get a double mastectomy. Reshaping? No no…it’s alright. I can do without them."
[–]Qu33rTh1ng
for me the big thing was watching gay men on tv and wishing I could be them, then later realizing i can lol
[–]donkeyballz13
The first time grown men cozily discuss their disgusting thoughts about women with you, a ''fellow bro".
Edit for a plus 1: When you're finally treated like a man in society and the most important lesson you can learn is the true meaning of privilege.
[–]Sweaty_DogMan
Anorexia to make my body stay boxy
[–]ratsy_basty
"I like men in the way other men like men, I cant explain it"
[–]Broad-Property6823
Since breast and ovarian cancer run in my family, I've been telling my whole family since I was like 8 that I was going to get a full hysterectomy and masectomy as soon as I turned 18... just "as a preventative measure." I also told my whole family I'd disappear and they'd never hear from me again (I was planning on moving to another continent where no one knew me and living as a boy...)
Spent my first paycheck at 15 on a binder from Amazon (smuggled it in the house because my parents wpuld never approve), just "because clothes just look better without boobs." I told this confidently to my sister and she said "no". Prior to that I'd worn exclusively sports bras for 3 years.
ED to prevent breast/thigh/butt development. The hardest part of recovery was watching the weight gain go straight to those areas.
Since 12, using makeup to try and masculinize my face.
Under 8, liked to go about shirtless. Why couldn't I do it if my brother could?
At 9, got my hair cut short to look more like a boy. My mom never let me cut it that short again.
I didn't hate all of my dresses, but I hated that I had to wear them to go sit in a church and be told that my gender is eternal and I'd be a good addition to someone's wife roster and have lots of babies (yeah I was raised mormon). Hated the girl-specific events. Never fit in with the girls in my school or church class and could never figure out what I was doing wrong.
Talked with my sister about how much we wished we were born male, how much easier it would've been, etc. I told her at one point (while still religious) that I was going to find a man who wanted to be my wife, then we'd do the whole "two bodies become one under god" and switcheroo all the reproductive organs so he'd be the woman and carry the kids but it'd still be biologically both of our child. I thought this was a genius idea. I'm so dense the closet was made of glass
[–]fieryembers
My dad used to take me into the men’s bathroom as a kid when my mom wasn’t around. I got very used to the men’s bathroom to the point in elementary school I was confused as to why the staff kept telling me to stop trying to go into the boys bathroom. I remember being told that I had to use the girls bathroom and then using it and breaking down in tears bc it didn’t feel right. That was over 20 years ago. If only I could hug little me and tell him that he’s okay.
[–]jojob421
When I was a kid, I thought that when I turned 18, I’d be able to go to court and they could give me a penis
[–]StealthRoboticHuman
Bro same. Wished that I'd get cancer to get them off. Also delusionally thinking that "how hard could surgery be. With I sharp knife I can do it myself." Tbh still have that thought sometimes when cramping.
[–]ClaraMouse
Writing far too detailed supernatural fan fiction as a teen. Watching vids of gay dudes as "research" so my writing would be "accurate". Also dating a straight man for the first time while still closeted and being so disappointed that it wasn't how I pictured loving a man would be like.
[–]garciaparadox
Kind of a weird one but. Watching that one South Park episode as a kid where they used stem cells or something to grow a human penis on a mouse for a "penis transplant" and then getting depressed for weeks upon learning that bottom surgery isn't that simple (somehow it would still take me a decade after this to realize I was trans)
[–]throwaway238579465
I had convinced myself that I just had breast cancer when I started going through puberty in an effort to convince myself that I wasn't actually going through female puberty (I thought that my breast growth was due to cancerous tumors and not female puberty). Similarly, I convinced myself that my period was also cancer because, again, that was more comforting than accepting that I was actually female. Once I accepted it, I definitely wished I could get breast cancer so I could have a mastectomy.
Lots of cancer stuff, for some reason.
[–]sleepymachinery
"What do you mean it's weird to want to be one of the men in BL?"
[–]B340STG
“I’m a pissed off gay man stuck in a lesbians body” lol
[–]mexalone
the rotisserie chicken obsession soon after starting T LOL
[–]AdventurEli9
That almost happened to me and I'm still jaded about it. They were certain it was breast cancer and going to be bad. We were planning my double mastectomy/ top surgery after the confirmation diagnosis biopsy. Turns out it was a large, strange tangled mass of shit that oddly enough wasn't cancerous but needed removal. So now my extra large breasts are weirdly uneven, hurt all the time now, and I haven't found a way to get top surgery. I spent a month mentally preparing for the cancer battle AND putting a fast track on coming terms with my identity. It was a really rough month. The silver lining of my situation was the medically necessary double mastectomy. Then it went away and I was still in the red state I was in and didn't have a safe or accessible way to get top surgery. I'm 45, I don't know where the light at the end of that particular tunnel is. I guess I haul these lumps with me and hope for better luck in my next lifetime.
[–]0pabinia
being obsessed with dicks. not even in a sexual way just absolutely obsessed i always wondered what mine would look like if i had one, how would it feel, how would i pee standing up, if would i use the fly of my pants. i also thought being intersex was so cool and wished i also had both parts. just dick obsessed.
[–]PatheticallyKnox
Fantasying about how fun it would to have a dick in the middle of the Covid lockdown
[–]bearfootin_9
The feeling of utter betrayal when I started to develop breasts.
[–]Duskwulf
I had a breast cancer scare early into my social transition, and the upside I looked to was having a masectomy...I get it.
Looking at myself in a mirror wearing some costume clothes from a friend and thinking "I'd be so attractive if I were a boy."
Wearing a big, baggy hoodie in hs, carrying around a candy box for fundraising and having someone call out "hey man!" to get my attention, and grinning to myself.
In college I had to fill out a census and I remember being a bit caught up in the fact that you HAD to answer M/F (I wasn't even aware of nb identities at the time) I was ranting to my friends, and when some stoners in the quad below my room heard I even included these strangers, raving about how the government was "disregarding my need for a dick"
[–]godwontpiss
Getting hard because my chicken parm tasted so good
Dating men that, in hindsight, definitely saw me as a Quirky Woman™
Writing angsty teenage poetry about how my body didn't feel like mine
Duct tape binder
[–]Proper-Monk-5656
i actually still kind of wish that my relatives passed down the gene of heightened breast cancer risk to me so i could get top surgery for free (as in, preventative double mastectomy).
my canon event: going to the hairdresser as a kid/teen, asking for "a boy cut", and leaving with a karen bob
[–]carnespecter
watching multiple loved family members die slow agonizing wasting deaths from both breast and cervical cancer kind of ruined the fun of "i wish i got breast cancer lol"
If I recount them this is going to get depressing real quick
I definitely wished for Breast Cancer
I wished for uterine cancer so I could get my uterus removed WAY before I knew I was transmasc. So yeah, I relate.
I wanted this before I even knew trans people were a thing… this definitely seems to be a super common experience among trans people, unfortunately.
I never wished for it, but I remember asking my mom "if women can get cancer in their breast, why dont they all just get them removed? I think thats what ill do." 
i got diagnosed with a 30% cancer risk gene AFTER my top surgery 
if i'd known id considered a complete vs cosmetic! Not to be a downer, just wanted to say "literally real asf" literally
if i'd known id considered a complete vs cosmetic! Not to be a downer, just wanted to say "literally real asf" literally
I remember going to my docter and almost smiling when asking hil to check for breast cancer 
[–]boypussy127
the "im not like the other girls" phasei was, in fact, not like the other girls
also, wanting to be underweight so my body would be skinny enough to not have prominent curves and my chest flat
I used to cry because my mom said having a fat ass was genetic in her family... I tried not to eat so I would use the fat from my ass cheeks??? 
My mother is the same. I always had a small ass, and I remember talking to my mother about it when I was little and she said something along the lines of, "don't worry; you'll get a butt some day," and I just started bawling because I didn't want to look womanly, haha XD
This one was a trip because during my adolescence, it got kind of turned into a bad thing for a girl to say that she wasn’t like other girls. Like you think you’re better than other people or something.
[–]MagicalGirl4
"Every girl has body issues so I'm totally normal for feeling this way about mine"
"Every girl feels like getting her period is the end of the fucking world and lives in denial that its happening for years. Totally normal. All my friends hate their periods." Turns out they did not, in fact, feel like it was the end of the world and were living in denial about the fact that it was happening. Who knew?
I still remember that dizzy, panicked, dropping feeling when it first happened. Then my mom got excited and wanted to tell all my extended family.
I was in bed, crying for three days at my first period. Turns out that getting depression during your period because of hormones works differently and I was just dysphoric as hell. I calculated how often I'd have periods in my life and had a list of that. Uterine problems run in my family, so I was hoping to be able to get a hysterectomy as soon as a doctor would operate on me.
[–]spider_strawberry
Trying and failing to make a binder out of tights as a pre teen
Trying and failing to tape my boobs back with clear scotch tape as a pre teen 
I went through my high school graduation dance with my chest taped with painters tape
[–]Okchamali_Vibin
Being obsessed with Mulan as a child
Not understanding why I can't take my shirt off to play in the sprinkler
Exclusively wearing high compression sports bras
My high school boyfriend and I calling each other the masculinized/feminized versions of our names
THESE ARE SO REAL, Mulan was a real gay awakening for me as well .
.
I was just really disappointed she lived as a girl later xD
Envy of being able to pee on the side of the road or into water bottles if needed and thinking about it unprompted on road trips in a kind of longing way.
I was so jealous of my friend for being able to piss while standing up as a little kid.
[–]throwaway9999-22222
i'M nOt LiKe oThEr GiRLs
Turns out that I fr wasn't like the other girls
When I was a little kid I refused to wear/use anything with pink on it and banned anyone from referring to me as "cute" 
Post transition I actually love both those things! Which I think really emphasizes how much I was revolting from the gender I was wrongly assigned that those things are so strongly associated with
Post transition I actually love both those things! Which I think really emphasizes how much I was revolting from the gender I was wrongly assigned that those things are so strongly associated with
Same. I love pink and glitter and being cute now.
[–]satonabug
i tried to bind my chest with duct tape when i was 15, prob not super common with young ppl now but i absolutely do not recommend.
[–]throwaway9999-22222
Jack Frost
Hero from Big Hero 6
I love how you don't even need to say "rise of the guardians" and we ALL know 
Hiccup from how to train your dragon and Mary McFly from Back to the Future for me
[–]WWJackSparrowD
Watching that Catfish/catphish show with a friend. I thought to myself "hahaha wouldn't it be sooo funny to pretend to be a guy online... jk jk... unless..." and that was my second ever moment of gender euphoria.
I don't even remember why I thought it would have been funny anymore....
(First ever moment of gender euphoria was when I was in middle school and thrifted a nice argyle sweater but I don't think that counts lmao)
[–]FullPruneNight
Feeling so much strange quiet joy when my sister decided to ironically imitate dudebros and would call me dude, bro, man, son all the time
Absolutely loving when my friend’s older brother dressed us up in boy drag and gave us boy lessons to “keep us safe” the first time we were allowed to wander farther
Wrapping my chest with ace bandages for weeks when I broke some ribs (don’t, obviously)
“Not like other girls,” because y’know, I wasn’t
Loving Mulan, but absolutely sobbing to Reflection by myself in my closet
Getting to be a sort of girl-son
Weirdly, making my sister do made up dances with me. Even as a kid it felt GAY, not GIRL
Riding a cis man sans penetration and as I make him tell me his dick belongs to me
[–]Adventurous_Text6152
Trying to pee standing up as a kid and consequently pissing on the floor
[–]MockVervain
Multiple Halloweens saying “what if I just dress up like a man as convincingly as possible, good fake beard and all”
Wishing for ovarian cysts/cancer/other so I could get those things pulled out
I used to go to a woman’s only gym and on measuring days the trainers would always remark about how luck I was that my breasts weren’t shrinking. And trying not to say “well how do I get them to do that then?” was rather difficult.
Feeling disappointed when (honestly multiple) yoga instructors over the years have said “don’t worry this won’t give you ‘man arms’”
Obligatory Mulan and Joan d’Arc obsessions
[–]paprikahoernchen
The scariest moment in my life..
Trying on your first binder.
Getting stuck in it.
Accepting death.
And did anyone else ever played a boy on habbo hotel, just for fun?
habbo hotel aaaaaaaaa yes. i was a boy on there as a teen and had an e-gf and everything.
[–]kai_likes_caffeine
I'm a psych major so I've touched on Sigmund Freud a lot (and oh boy is he something), but I distinctly remember in school when I was younger I learnt about Freuds penis envy when we covered his psychosexual stages. (For those who don't know what that is, Freud claimed that all young girls felt anxiety and deficiency upon realizing they lack a penis) and I thought that was completely normal and of course every "girl" experiences that. The day I learnt that no, infact that is not something everyone feels, shook younger me to my core lol
[–]homicidal_bird
Before I even realized I was trans- asking my parents to buy broccoli, almonds, and grapes because Tumblr said they were high in testosterone.
[–]Pigeon_Cult
Wearing only baggy hoodies all the time
Not giving two craps about my appearance beyond wanting to be fully covered and not form fitting for my first 17 or so years. Just didn't even really think about it. Came up with excuses not to wear women's clothes, though (fabric is bad, fit is bad, too complicated).
[–]VillageInner8961
watching Mulan then getting an unhealthy obsession with the song Reflection
[–]hypernoble
omg I wished for it too
and then I had top surgery and I DID have breast cancer and I felt like a reeeeeal asshole[–]TheElfPrince
"Oops I got breast cancer guess I’ll just have to get a double mastectomy. Reshaping? No no…it’s alright. I can do without them."
[–]Qu33rTh1ng
for me the big thing was watching gay men on tv and wishing I could be them, then later realizing i can lol
[–]donkeyballz13
The first time grown men cozily discuss their disgusting thoughts about women with you, a ''fellow bro".
Edit for a plus 1: When you're finally treated like a man in society and the most important lesson you can learn is the true meaning of privilege.
[–]Sweaty_DogMan
Anorexia to make my body stay boxy
[–]ratsy_basty
"I like men in the way other men like men, I cant explain it"
[–]Broad-Property6823
Since breast and ovarian cancer run in my family, I've been telling my whole family since I was like 8 that I was going to get a full hysterectomy and masectomy as soon as I turned 18... just "as a preventative measure." I also told my whole family I'd disappear and they'd never hear from me again (I was planning on moving to another continent where no one knew me and living as a boy...)
Spent my first paycheck at 15 on a binder from Amazon (smuggled it in the house because my parents wpuld never approve), just "because clothes just look better without boobs." I told this confidently to my sister and she said "no". Prior to that I'd worn exclusively sports bras for 3 years.
ED to prevent breast/thigh/butt development. The hardest part of recovery was watching the weight gain go straight to those areas.
Since 12, using makeup to try and masculinize my face.
Under 8, liked to go about shirtless. Why couldn't I do it if my brother could?
At 9, got my hair cut short to look more like a boy. My mom never let me cut it that short again.
I didn't hate all of my dresses, but I hated that I had to wear them to go sit in a church and be told that my gender is eternal and I'd be a good addition to someone's wife roster and have lots of babies (yeah I was raised mormon). Hated the girl-specific events. Never fit in with the girls in my school or church class and could never figure out what I was doing wrong.
Talked with my sister about how much we wished we were born male, how much easier it would've been, etc. I told her at one point (while still religious) that I was going to find a man who wanted to be my wife, then we'd do the whole "two bodies become one under god" and switcheroo all the reproductive organs so he'd be the woman and carry the kids but it'd still be biologically both of our child. I thought this was a genius idea. I'm so dense
the closet was made of glassAlso raised mormon, related to that bit immediately. Adds a whole level to the religious trauma when it was so very, very gender based.
I was legitimately convinced for the longest time that I would never get married and would just reject a partner "in the next life" because the thought of being someone's brood mare was so abhorrent. I know a lot of cis women struggle with that concept too but oh man. towards the end of my belief in the church, I was more than willing to deny God and do whatever it took to go to hell so I wouldn't have to do any of that (and the whole thing about Satan's followers not having bodies — I thought I'd be so much happier without one). Still remember how offended my sister was when I told her I'd rather go to hell than that church's heaven. Did you ever have that moment or did you just skip to the leaving part?
[–]fieryembers
My dad used to take me into the men’s bathroom as a kid when my mom wasn’t around. I got very used to the men’s bathroom to the point in elementary school I was confused as to why the staff kept telling me to stop trying to go into the boys bathroom. I remember being told that I had to use the girls bathroom and then using it and breaking down in tears bc it didn’t feel right. That was over 20 years ago. If only I could hug little me and tell him that he’s okay.
[–]jojob421
When I was a kid, I thought that when I turned 18, I’d be able to go to court and they could give me a penis
[–]StealthRoboticHuman
Bro same. Wished that I'd get cancer to get them off. Also delusionally thinking that "how hard could surgery be. With I sharp knife I can do it myself." Tbh still have that thought sometimes when cramping.
[–]ClaraMouse
Writing far too detailed supernatural fan fiction as a teen. Watching vids of gay dudes as "research" so my writing would be "accurate". Also dating a straight man for the first time while still closeted and being so disappointed that it wasn't how I pictured loving a man would be like.
[–]garciaparadox
Kind of a weird one but. Watching that one South Park episode as a kid where they used stem cells or something to grow a human penis on a mouse for a "penis transplant" and then getting depressed for weeks upon learning that bottom surgery isn't that simple (somehow it would still take me a decade after this to realize I was trans)
[–]throwaway238579465
I had convinced myself that I just had breast cancer when I started going through puberty in an effort to convince myself that I wasn't actually going through female puberty (I thought that my breast growth was due to cancerous tumors and not female puberty). Similarly, I convinced myself that my period was also cancer because, again, that was more comforting than accepting that I was actually female. Once I accepted it, I definitely wished I could get breast cancer so I could have a mastectomy.
Lots of cancer stuff, for some reason.
[–]sleepymachinery
"What do you mean it's weird to want to be one of the men in BL?"
[–]B340STG
“I’m a pissed off gay man stuck in a lesbians body” lol
[–]mexalone
the rotisserie chicken obsession soon after starting T LOL
[–]AdventurEli9
That almost happened to me and I'm still jaded about it. They were certain it was breast cancer and going to be bad. We were planning my double mastectomy/ top surgery after the confirmation diagnosis biopsy. Turns out it was a large, strange tangled mass of shit that oddly enough wasn't cancerous but needed removal. So now my extra large breasts are weirdly uneven, hurt all the time now, and I haven't found a way to get top surgery. I spent a month mentally preparing for the cancer battle AND putting a fast track on coming terms with my identity. It was a really rough month. The silver lining of my situation was the medically necessary double mastectomy. Then it went away and I was still in the red state I was in and didn't have a safe or accessible way to get top surgery. I'm 45, I don't know where the light at the end of that particular tunnel is. I guess I haul these lumps with me and hope for better luck in my next lifetime.
[–]0pabinia
being obsessed with dicks. not even in a sexual way just absolutely obsessed i always wondered what mine would look like if i had one, how would it feel, how would i pee standing up, if would i use the fly of my pants. i also thought being intersex was so cool and wished i also had both parts. just dick obsessed.
[–]PatheticallyKnox
Fantasying about how fun it would to have a dick in the middle of the Covid lockdown
[–]bearfootin_9
The feeling of utter betrayal when I started to develop breasts.
[–]Duskwulf
I had a breast cancer scare early into my social transition, and the upside I looked to was having a masectomy...I get it.
Looking at myself in a mirror wearing some costume clothes from a friend and thinking "I'd be so attractive if I were a boy."
Wearing a big, baggy hoodie in hs, carrying around a candy box for fundraising and having someone call out "hey man!" to get my attention, and grinning to myself.
In college I had to fill out a census and I remember being a bit caught up in the fact that you HAD to answer M/F (I wasn't even aware of nb identities at the time) I was ranting to my friends, and when some stoners in the quad below my room heard I even included these strangers, raving about how the government was "disregarding my need for a dick"
[–]godwontpiss
Getting hard because my chicken parm tasted so good
Dating men that, in hindsight, definitely saw me as a Quirky Woman™
Writing angsty teenage poetry about how my body didn't feel like mine
Duct tape binder
[–]Proper-Monk-5656
i actually still kind of wish that my relatives passed down the gene of heightened breast cancer risk to me so i could get top surgery for free (as in, preventative double mastectomy).
my canon event: going to the hairdresser as a kid/teen, asking for "a boy cut", and leaving with a karen bob
[–]carnespecter
watching multiple loved family members die slow agonizing wasting deaths from both breast and cervical cancer kind of ruined the fun of "i wish i got breast cancer lol"
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