@Mound Dweller cooking thread - Welcome to 5 star br*t*sh cuisine n’wah

[Rango Dango]

@Mound Dweller make bigos. I dare you.

he would lowkey ruin it

 

[The Jewel of the Nile]

It's either bigos or brussel sprouts, I'm voting for the former

 

[souschef]

Bigos

The polish are a funny people

 

[JambledUpWords]

@Mound Dweller, have you tried making homemade gnocchi? You can do it all by hand, and there’s a ricotta and a potato version. I’ve made both types, but as far as easiness goes, ricotta gnocchi is better for that. You can top it with pesto or tomato sauce.

 

[Mound Dweller]

Belayed 4/20 everypony.

have you tried making homemade gnocchi?

Far too fancy, tagliatelle maybe.

@Mound Dweller make bigos. I dare you.

I might get some of the premade stuff, could pick out the cabbage and have it with beef.

 

[Epic Fail Man]

Belayed 4/20 everypony.
View attachment 8892814

Far too fancy, tagliatelle maybe.

I might get some of the premade stuff, could pick out the cabbage and have it with beef.

premade bigos sounds like it'll be some spawn from hell. It's like making stew, it ain't that hard.

https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/138131/bigos-hunters-stew/

 

[Me•cha•ni•cal]

Pale air fried chips, some probably still cold in the middle accompanied by an unidentifiable protein source, finished off with a poorly drawn swastika in either HP or BBQ sauce.

I like the artistic flare on this one. I give it a solid 8/8.

 

[The Jewel of the Nile]

Pale air fried chips, some probably still cold in the middl

Soggy and pale fries are the best

 

[JambledUpWords]

Spoiler: American content

Homemade sushi, spicy salmon and cucumber. A good way to eat vegetables and fish.

 

[The Lurky 1]

Spoiler: American content

View attachment 8914319
Homemade sushi, spicy salmon and cucumber. A good way to eat vegetables and fish.

 

[Me•cha•ni•cal]

Yorkshire pudding, yay or nay?

 

[Mound Dweller]

Sunday status: sacrosanct

Spoiler: English Content

c*cumber

BLEH!
I of course despise all spawn of the grown-earth, but c*cumber especially, their TAINT infects all they come into contact with, can't even pretend to enjoy a salad if there's cuntcumber in there because the afflictive ichor of them TAINTS all.

Y*rkshire pudding, yay or nay?

God no, I'm a pastry eating man; none of that pseudo-crap round here please

 

[Me•cha•ni•cal]

God no, I'm a pastry eating man; none of that pseudo-crap round here please

Isn’t it just oven baked pancake batter? What’s wrong with that?? It’s beige food!!

I’m curious, what about v*getables do you not like? Texture, flavor or both? Do you eat beans?

 

[Mound Dweller]

Isn’t it just oven baked pancake batter? What’s wrong with that?? It’s beige food!!

It's hard to explain, I don't mind the freshly made ones but the vast vast majority of them you eat anywhere will be pre-made frozen and shit-tier (aka the only kind I ever got forced to eat whilst having a developing brain), there's also sociopolitcal considerations but you'll just have to take my word on that one.

I’m curious, what about v*getables do you not like? Texture, flavor or both? Do you eat beans?

Entirely psychosomatic, I once had a very nice pate on some very nice bread, about halfway through slice two I felt a strange feeling and all of a sudden noooticed there were m*shrooms in it, I had to chug my drink to prevent an immediate vomiting. I quite simply cannot eat them. Beans? No

 

[powdered toast]

BEANS ON TOAST IS NOT A REAL FOOD. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER.

Listen, I'm American and I never understood this either. But then I made a proper 18th century Boston baked beans recipe in a bean crock, cooked all day and everything. They are incredibly good as a breakfast food, on toast, with eggs/bacon/potatoes, etc etc. It was really a lightbulb moment and I went "I GET it now". I still don't get how anyone likes the canned slop on toast, but now I understand how a culture developed eating beans for breakfast and perhaps just got used to canned crap replacing good breakfast beans. Real baked beans are awesome on toast/with breakfast.

 

[Me•cha•ni•cal]

Beans?

But you’re British! Is your full English breakfast just eggs, bacon, sausages and black pudding?? How do you order it? Reverse vegetarian fry up, please??

I feel like beans aren’t too different in texture from boiled potatoes, once you get passed the thin skin/membrane thing covering it. They’re not super flavourful either.

I once had a very nice pate on some very nice bread, about halfway through slice two I felt a strange feeling and all of a sudden noooticed there were m*shrooms in it

So vegetables that have been pureed can taste kinda good if you don’t know they’re there? Is tomato sauce edible?

 

[Mound Dweller]

British

Bri;ish is a slur, there is no such thing as br'ish, it is an invented identifier much like "beligian" "americ*n" and "sp*nish", it is a purely geographic distinction; no such thing as bri;ish people. Full English isn't something I especially enjoy because it's just too much for the start of the day, I much prefer yoghurt because I like not having clogged heart valves, it's fine for dinner though; just with extra egg to substitute for anything earth-grown.

So vegetables that have been pureed can taste kinda good if you don’t know they’re there? Is tomato sauce edible?

You don't understand, they may well taste fine but that doesn't matter, because I do not know, because I simply cannot eat them. Yes this is retarded, no, there isn't anything I can do about it, yes it is kinda funny, but it's also unironically sort of an actual disability. You can apologize for mocking the handicapped now

 

[Zeftax]

I saw some asparagus at the store today! I bought it, to try it again, and share it with the thread, But I got drunk, so I'll save it for tomorrow.
So far, mu plan is to steam the asparagus in a pot. At the same time roast a steak in a pan, in a bunch of butter, with thyme and rosemary (fresh from my window still), then, finish the asparagus in this fat. Some potatoes, parallel with this, in an oven = fries. Deglaze the pan with wine, and use it as a sauce, together with a bit of flour as a roux, plan? Fuck, my mouth is watering, and I wanted to cook it today, but I had too much wine now, and no wine is left for the sauce.
Tomorrow I will try it, and orientate my opinion of asparagus further on this good night and good week, whatever. You're all great

 

[McKennai]

Entirely psychosomatic, I once had a very nice pate on some very nice bread, about halfway through slice two I felt a strange feeling and all of a sudden noooticed there were m*shrooms in it, I had to chug my drink to prevent an immediate vomiting. I quite simply cannot eat them

Think it's on the same wavelength as people liking/disliking sweetness&salt , pate with with pickled stuff (onions, etc.) is usually good stuff.
Guess you wouldn't dare get near something akin to a blood sausage with fried apples except if it was already pre-blended inside it.

So far, mu plan is to steam the asparagus in a pot

Throw in a couple of lemon slices if you haven't before.

 

[Zeftax]

Think it's on the same wavelength as people liking/disliking sweetness&salt , pate with with pickled stuff (onions, etc.) is usually good stuff.
Think you wouldn't dare get near something akin to a blood sausage with fried apples except if it was already pre-blended inside it.

Fuck, man, I love some innards sausage, delicious. I don't eat the skin though. Not even the sausage too often, it is full of fat, which I usually avoid. But when I do eat it. it is delicious.