🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

Will Ralph see Xander on November 15th?

  • Yes

  • No

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HackerX said:
It still boggles my mind that he chose to broadcast that out onto the Internet, regardless of whether it's true or not. Like, what did he expect to gain from it?
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Ralph can only see life through the lense of wrestling storylines, so by telling that story he's "gone over" Pantsu just like dropping Faith's guntening tape was him going over Halfway Cuck.
 
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Ralph purports himself as some ground breaking writer/editor like he didn’t just leave in the part where he gets tired of screeching about being bullied and wants a sandwich.
 
Elks_antler said:
"Swap Xanax stories bro" :story:
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It's a shame that the Quartering is ignoring Piggy. Just look what an exciting life he's living and we'll never hear all these sensational junkie stories. Maybe he can write a chapter in his book about it.
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"Waking up in a certain place"
:felted:Ah woke up on the concrete floor of my shitbox, covered in shards of piss bottle glass and drenched in urine, haha.
 
So the original plan was to go to Quarterpounder's state to bully him, but now Ralph's sucking his gunt crease?

Immediately after an extremely emotional blog post about how Jersh is mean to him?

We need to find you a new e-daddy, Ralph. This is just sad, honestly.
 
lol. lmao even.
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Ralph is still trying to LARP as his gonzo hero while implying he could stay sober long enough to finish a book.
 
Oliver Onions said:
lol. lmao even.
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Ralph is still trying to LARP as his gonzo hero while implying he could stay sober long enough to finish a book.
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"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body if you wanna know the truth about it, but rather to fall off your streaming chair in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming 'Do I look five one bish!?'"

- Ethan Oliver Ralph
 
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Rage Pig said:
It's a shame that the Quartering is ignoring Piggy. Just look what an exciting life he's living and we'll never hear all these sensational junkie stories. Maybe he can write a chapter in his book about it.
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"Waking up in a certain place"
:felted:Ah woke up on the concrete floor of my shitbox, covered in shards of piss bottle glass and drenched in urine, haha.
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Except Ethan doesn't have any friends
 
Oliver Onions said:
lol. lmao even.
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Ralph is still trying to LARP as his gonzo hero while implying he could stay sober long enough to finish a book.
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Well manlet got a couple things in common with his (non-movie version) hero- both of them were/are subject to beat downs occasionally and both were/are into domestic violence as a matter of fact bish.

And if you knew the man, he was a shell of himself after he burned out. He was too weak to lay hands on his younger, smarter wife. He had Hep C from drugs and enjoyed the Keith Richards special in Switzerland yearly to stay alive till he decided he was done. Or his son decided he was done, despite what the investigations said.

None of it matters because Ralph is too messed up to sit without any distractions, crack a book, and focus his one good eye on it. They are available in unabridged audiobooks but that requires not looking at KF and X actually listening.

Here’s a little challenge for Senior. This should be an easy task for a self-proclaimed journalist (who definitely knew that HST didn’t look like Johnny Depp and used that image as his killstream trademark lol)-
Whip up a 500 word xitter essay about Nixon. In all these years I’ve never once heard you so much as mention Richard Nixon. Or Vietnam. Or 1968. Go on.
 
JustStopDude said:
Ralph cannot even stay sober enough to board a plane reliably but he is going to write a book.
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Ralph please write that book. You don't need to proofread it, just sit down and type your feelings. I'll fucking buy it and read it for your audiobook, no AI or anything. I promise big guy.
 
Mr. Manchester said:
Ralph please write that book. You don't need to proofread it, just sit down and type your feelings. I'll fucking buy it and read it for your audiobook, no AI or anything. I promise big guy.
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I'm with you. I would read the shit out of it. I just don't think he could do it. I don't even think he could do it when a ghost writer at this point.

God, imagine trying to be Ralph's ghost writer. Showing up to the shack to pick his pickled brain. Lol.
 
We already know Ralph’s life, of what interest could an autobiography be? Laughing at him after he remembers the em-dash is a telltale sign AI wrote it for the second time?
 
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