UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

Liechtenstein · 2026-05-04T07:13:15-0400

Clem Fandango said:
On (im)mature reflection, I've decided I will vote Reform, but by drawing a cock in the box instead of an 'X'

Stop... as an upper-middle class, flag-tearing, Private Eye reading IT consultant from some leafy 92% white suburb in the South East, you're making me cum with sheer delight, and I got a hecking vasectomy last year!

Heinrich Maneuver · 2026-05-04T07:22:35-0400

Allies of Andy Burnham have asked some of Keir Starmer's No 10 team if they want to stay in their jobs after he is replaced. There are reports of MPs saying they will stand down so Andy can be elected in their seat as well. So what do we think, Burnham leadership challenge (vote

), Rayner leadership challenge (vote

), Streeting leadership challenge (vote

) or some kind of unholy combination of two, or all three of them, teaming up (vote

)? I can see total chaos of all three of them gunning for leadership at once, totally collapsing the party.

Tony Martin's Force Ghost · 2026-05-04T08:07:34-0400

It will be Streeting and Cooper as exchequer. Horrifying, I know, but remember these faggots are gormless and spineless when the bombs start dropping, they will scurry away.

cancelmysubscription · 2026-05-04T08:51:28-0400

diroama said:
I think intellectually proportional representation makes a lot of sense, and I think it would solve a lot of problems for the two "big tent" main parties, but the fact that it would give the green party a fighting chance each election of ending up having influence on government policy means I can't be in favour.

An issue that I think isn’t mentioned nearly enough is that at the next election, sixteen year olds will be voting.

That page regarding immigration from the Green Party website reads as though it was written by a delusional kid that has absolutely no experience of the real world. I suspect the Green Party will get a fair few votes from this newly enfranchised demographic.

Not to mention the muslim communities, who have a lot of kids, now being able to add all their sixteen and seventeen year old’s ballot slips to the pile to effectively pass over to their imam to fill in.

Crispy Jakes said:

I hate this shit so much.

Something that would be an easy and effective messaging pivot would be to consistently and confidently state that ‘racism is a perfectly natural and healthy thing’, remove the fear, remove the ‘not all…’ type shit, it’s a massive hindrance but deeply entrenched due to decades of constant conditioning.

teriyakiburns said:
I do, but it's a bit soft.

I tried boycotting every company that had a ‘black man/white woman’ advert. I ended up living like Ted Kaczynski.

Heinrich Maneuver said:
If you've watched any single 'who are you voting for' street interview recently, a good amount of very average people are 'hmmm don't know Green or Reform...', which shows how fucked the traditional parties are.

How on earth could anybody be one or the other? The parties are polar opposites on every single issue. ‘Too many migrants, but believe in the worst of climate change’, is that the person?

anklyscr · 2026-05-04T09:12:30-0400

Heinrich Maneuver said:
The migrants who died crossing the channel this morning were a woman (20) and a 16-year-old girl, both of which did not die from drowning, but were "found dead inside the boat". An investigation has been launched. They were likely raped and killed inside the boat, if the rumours are true.

What a lovely culture the gdp boosters are bringing in.

teriyakiburns · 2026-05-04T09:15:44-0400

cancelmysubscription said:
An issue that I think isn’t mentioned nearly enough is that at the next election, sixteen year olds will be voting.

That's assuming the bill passes. It's fairly likely, but it may die in the Lords.

Especially when you've got idiots pushing amendments like this:

Giving 16 year-olds the vote is the headline of the bill, but the rest is a grab-bag of bullshit like punishing "hostility" towards candidates, repealing voter ID, banning political donations by the wrong kinds of people, automatically registering to vote (which opens a gigantic voter fraud window), and generally restricting the franchise of the native in favour of the outsider. It's a fucking travesty of a bill, which they're trying to rush through on a short timetable with "won't someone think of the ~~children~~teenagers!"-level emotional manipulation.

One interesting sign is that almost all the amendments are coming from lib dems, which might indicate that Labour MPs aren't engaging with it, or might just indicate that they're getting what they want already. It's yet to enter committee, which starts on the 18th. There's every chance of the legislative session being thrown into chaos if Starmer, as widely predicted, is forced out after the locals, which would mean the bill dies before the end of the session. It's also possible they're being strategic with it, expecting it to be held up in the Lords so they can justify gutting the upper chamber even more.

femboy fart huffer · 2026-05-04T10:36:08-0400

PandaChai said:
Just got this through the letterbox, is this even legal?

The libdems are the most likely to beat reform? The libdems fucking exist? The only thing that will beat reform is nigel being a faggot.

evrae · 2026-05-04T10:55:52-0400

I got a similar leaflet but from the Greens. Sadly the dog is too used to passing us the post unscathed to be tempted to chew it up before we could read the drivel. Looking at it I've got no Restore candidates so will vote Reform to try to keep the Greens out. Unfortunately I feel that because there's plenty of students in the area this ward will probably go Green by a thin margin, electoral maps suggest a toss-up between Reform or Green here.

Me and the family are waiting for Restore to get more established anyways, and I feel that's a common trend across the board.

As an aside, very funny seeing Zack screech about anti-semitism when he was just then seething about the way the police handled a mudslime stabbing up his fellow heebs.

EDIT: I also don't think the Green door knocker appreciated me saying that I'd actually vote for them if Zack genuinely could make women's tits bigger. Surely it's a great idea, they could even have a slogan like "The G in Green also stands for cup size!" or something.

Heinrich Maneuver · 2026-05-04T11:46:07-0400

cancelmysubscription said:
How on earth could anybody be one or the other?

People who are sick of Tories and Labour but otherwise don't engage with party politics (a lot of people). Green or Reform are just seen as 'a new choice' and some still think of Green as the hippie environment party (maybe the Greens going 'mask off' has changed a few minds but i doubt it). I'm also surprised to see Green or Reform voters, but I'm also not, because I'm a sperg for politics who is shocked every week finding out the average person does not know anything about what's going on in this country. Many people are just voting for 'something new'.

Woman dies after being rescued from a canal in Walsall.

A woman has died after she was rescued from a canal in Walsall in the early hours of Sunday.

West Midlands Police said she was found in the water off Wolverhampton Street at about 01:15 BST, and her death was being treated as unexplained.

The area was cordoned off by officers at the scene and a blue tent was put up at the site.

The force urged anyone with information to get in touch, with a spokesperson adding "our thoughts are with her loved ones and we'll be supporting them as our inquiries continue".

Just a boring name · 2026-05-04T12:00:10-0400

Our Independent candidate makes it very clear that they are aligned with Restore Britain, however we are in a ward where we have 3 votes to cast this year.
Labour, Conservative, Green and LibDems are definitely not going to get my vote, but we have many Reform candidates standing in this election and the Independent.

I will be voting for the Independent candidate, however I'm not sure what to do with my other 2 votes....If I vote for ONLY the Independent candidate (we are not allowed to vote more than once for the same person) then I've chucked 2 votes in the bin, but if I also vote for Reform, that's 2 votes for them and in the area I live in they will probably win.

I didn't think it was allowed to have more than 1 person from a party to stand.

K1wigirl97 · 2026-05-04T13:33:37-0400

diroama said:
Another that i hope i'm not late about.

A funny shitpost of a policy from Reform: announcing that they will place immigration detention centres exclusively in areas voting Green, and away from places that vote reform.

This has resulted in outcries of how abhorrent this policy is, but nobody has managed to articulate why. Surely green voters welcome the enrichment opportunities?

https://x.com/ZiaYusufUK/status/2051033457464127976

View attachment 8953204

The only problem with this policy is it's being announced by someone called "Zia Yusuf".

He is a nasty little creep. Zia Yusif is in a leadership role because of the massive amounts of dosh he chucks at reform. I mean the man has the personality of a Greggs vegan sausage roll left in a puddle of day old winos wee & the charisma of a dead rodent covered in sick. I wonder why would a believing Muslim chuck money at the one decent sized party that has supporters who would like Muslims deported.
If he stays in reform I think he'll either quietly work to water certain policies down OR at some point take it over after they have & have it go full Muslim

EddyRooney · 2026-05-04T14:14:34-0400

Menopause made me leave my husband – here’s what I wish I’d known

All I read is a load of hormonal women complaining about their husbands and their shortcomings. They seem to then want to break up whatever family unit they have because they think the grass is greener. Only later to then complain about the consequences of their decisions. One regretted the fact that she agreed to a divorce settlement that wasn't as favourable as she thought it could be. Didn't get the payoff she hoped for.

It's no wonder men are going their own way. Faced with this shit and the legal lunacy of the misandrist family divorce courts, what rational man with assets would get married or even involved with a woman now ? It seems to me that the second factor compounds the first one.

Certainly any wealth created by a man is at risk. Any sound businessman wouldn't agree to a contract which incentivises the other party to break it.

I do wonder if how society is now structured is to destroy the nuclear family. It seems women are fed completely unrealistic expectations of relationships, in the vast majority of cases both parents have to work now so traditional roles are blurred, family courts are ridiculously one sided, men are realising they are better off without commitment.

To top it all off there is now rumours of an EU law regarding a retrospective withdrawl of consent - this would be the final nail in the coffin for most men I would think. Whilst I doubt the accuracy of the video below, you can see the direction of travel.

I see all of this and there's only one race that is going to be prosecuted in these circumstances, one ethnicity of men in the majority of cases that will have family wealth and earned and accumulated wealth themselves. It is conspiracy theorist, but it does seem to be to discourage educated and hard working white men from breeding. It's just an accumulation of too many nudges in one direction.

Overly Serious · 2026-05-04T15:21:27-0400

I will not be voting for Reform. Reform have one and only one argument against Restore, which is "we are the more popular party and if you vote for Restore you are splitting the vote". I will not add stock to their argument. I would rather vote Tory which probably has fewer of the Tories in it now than Reform does. At least the ones I despised.

The logic of voting Reform is the logic of, as Douglas Adams put it, 'the wrong lizard might get in'. You have a better chance of success but you're also defining success as 'Boris Johnson Part II' Or worse given they might actually be handed an even larger majority. They are unquestionably the Uniparty and polling suggests they could sweep the board in a General Election if one were called. It would be a disaster imo.

I would genuinely rather a Green win than a Reform win and that's not hyperbole. If the Greens won which is very unlikely, they'd be very weak and national anger at the problems we face would continue to grow. Ditto if Labour somehow claw their way to some Lame Duck majority. If the Tories won (unlikely) I'd actually be happy as imo Badenoch is leading things in the right direction and some of the biggest rats have jumped ship to Reform. The worst scenario would actually be a strong Reform government because they would immediately stab their support base in the back and nobody would be able to do anything about it and it would discredit nationalist movements and sentiment for a generation. It would also cement them as "the" nationalist Right Wing party, closing the space to actual nationalist groups like Restore. It would, imo, be a disaster.

I genuinely think that Reform are a bigger threat to the country than the Greens. Not because the Greens don't have more batshit and awful policies than Reform - they do - but because the practical risk to the country is greater with Reform. I trust them that little. It's the difference between a certainty I would get punched in the face vs. the 1/20 chance that the lunatic with a slingshot 50' away will actually hit me. If you present it as which would you rather get hit by, well, you pick the punch in the face over the flying rock. But if you ask which are you more worried about, the answer is quite different.

Reform lead nowhere good. I'd rather people continue to get angry than think they've won when they've been conned. Only anger will enable the policies that might actually save the country.

Mound Dweller · 2026-05-04T15:54:45-0400

Overly Serious said:
I would rather vote Tory which probably has fewer of the Tories in it now than Reform does

Indeed but this goes both ways (in both ways too), you didn't hear it from me but it's looking like the Conservatives also have a lot more Restore members in them right now than Reform does, there's never a good time for turncoating though.

Overly Serious · 2026-05-04T15:57:51-0400

Mound Dweller said:
Indeed but this goes both ways (in both ways too), you didn't hear it from me but it's looking like the Conservatives also have a lot more Restore members in them right now than Reform does, there's never a good time for turncoating though.

Well honestly, Restore and the current Tories have more in common than Reform does with either, I think. Though obviously Restore have a much (much) more focused nationalism than the Tories.

Mound Dweller · 2026-05-04T16:00:44-0400

Overly Serious said:
Well honestly, Restore and the current Tories have more in common than Reform does with either, I think. Though obviously Restore have a much (much) more focused nationalism than the Tories.

Exactly, a big part of Restore's appeal is that they're the Tory party circa 1990/without the gayshit, the generation skew is/will be extreme, just being reasonable is what sets them apart especially for the particularist demographic.

Morethanabitfoolish · 2026-05-04T16:06:33-0400

Overly Serious said:
I genuinely think that Reform are a bigger threat to the country than the Greens.

Opens borders including automatic citizenship
Full legalisation of all drugs
Sex trade legalised
£15 an hour minimum wage
A long list of bans or making illegal various things
A leader and deputy leader more interested in protecting terrorists and terrorist sympathisers than their victims or those trying to stop them.

Reform are terrible but if you think 6 months of those Green policies are going to leave the country anything than a charred ruin you are very optimstic.

Overly Serious · 2026-05-04T16:17:17-0400

Morethanabitfoolish said:
Opens borders including automatic citizenship
Full legalisation of all drugs
Sex trade legalised
£15 an hour minimum wage
A long list of bans or making illegal various things
A leader and deputy leader more interested in protecting terrorists and terrorist sympathisers than their victims or those trying to stop them.

Reform are terrible but if you think 6 months of those Green policies are going to leave the country anything than a charred ruin you are very optimstic.

Sure. But... to emphasise my point again, which would be worse - getting mauled by a tiger or getting mauled by a pit bull? Answered that? Now answer which you think is the greatest risk to you? They're not the same question. The answer to which is worst is not the same as which is the biggest threat.

Reform are the bigger threat because they have a realistic chance of getting a mandate to enact whatever Borisite policies they want with nobody to stop them. They're a bigger threat because they have a realistic chance of subverting nationalist momentum and the build up of active resistance to the Establishment than the Greens.

One of the most basic and fundamental rules of power: "Deal with traitors first." Because we can oppose the Greens better than we can oppose those that take leadership positions over us and speak on our behalf.

Morethanabitfoolish · 2026-05-04T16:23:37-0400

Overly Serious said:
Reform are the bigger threat because they have a realistic chance of getting a mandate to enact whatever Borisite policies they want with nobody to stop them. They're a bigger threat because they have a realistic chance of subverting nationalist sentiment and the build up of active resistance to the Establishment than the Greens.

Fair points. But the Greens would destroy the country and if you think they've above bringing in laws that would stop parties like Reform or Restore even being allowed to exist you are missing a lot of what they are currently up to.

Also the Greens will get their mandate if they got in just like Labour did with what they have rolled out since their latest appointment to power. It doesn't matter if it's not what the country wants, if elected they would ride roughshod over any semblance of restraining laws because they will never get this chance again.

Overly Serious said:
One of the most basic and fundamental rules of power: "Deal with traitors first." Because we can oppose the Greens better than we can oppose those that take leadership positions over us and speak on our behalf.

True. But what makes any of that not applicable to the Greens? They sold out their party's underlying principles to chase certain voting blocs just as much as Reform did, their only defence is they have been doing so for longer.

Greens if elected would not have any reason to have even a shred of restraint. Nigel wants to be Tories 2.0, Zack wants to convert the country into an EU refugee island and anyone who objects when the imports decide to murder/rape their way through a primary school needs to be taken out back and shot.

Chunky Salsa · 2026-05-04T16:34:22-0400

Overly Serious said:
Sure. But... to emphasise my point again, which would be worse - getting mauled by a tiger or getting mauled by a pit bull? Answered that? Now answer which you think is the greatest risk to you? They're not the same question. The answer to which is worst is not the same as which is the biggest threat.

The party that has stated their absolute unwavering zeal to bring in almost 6 million browns a year and give them all our money, is a worse threat to the country than the party that will just maintain the current pipeline of poop. If Greens get in on any mandate, they will use it. There is this insane idea that parties that slip in by inches will somehow honour this and not making sweeping changes because...?

If I got into power by 1 vote more than my opposition, I would take that as my mandate from heaven to quite literally revolutionise the country to such an extreme degree that it would take literal decades to chip away at it. Greens would do the exact same.

UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

Liechtenstein

Heinrich Maneuver

it's just you, me and this wire

Tony Martin's Force Ghost

I killed a gypo!

cancelmysubscription

anklyscr

Seriously. Tits on a ghost

teriyakiburns

If anyone tried stealing my pot, I'd wrestle them.

femboy fart huffer

Brapping for Biden since '09

evrae

Funniest shit I've ever seen

Heinrich Maneuver

it's just you, me and this wire

Just a boring name

Thankyou Secret Santa 2025 for my Avatar.

K1wigirl97

EddyRooney

Overly Serious

Mound Dweller

awfully condescending and a little bit strange

Overly Serious

Mound Dweller

awfully condescending and a little bit strange

Morethanabitfoolish

Overly Serious

Morethanabitfoolish

Chunky Salsa