DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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So, his Paymentons is currently locked on just above $1k, it seems. It looks like your fanbase threw all their support on your last emergency, Gout King.

I am more interested in what happens next month to see if it was just the "emergency" or if it was a mix of that and Phil trashing his patrons all month. He never updated the goal, he is still pussy footing around with Danganronpa which was funded in April, and he is only getting around to May's goal at the end of July. His Patreon always sucked, but now that he can get instant money from Twitch it really doesn't seem like a priority. Maybe it is some kind of self sabotage where he doesn't make the goal so he can shut it down and blame his viewers.
 
I am more interested in what happens next month to see if it was just the "emergency" or if it was a mix of that and Phil trashing his patrons all month. He never updated the goal, he is still pussy footing around with Danganronpa which was funded in April, and he is only getting around to May's goal at the end of July. His Patreon always sucked, but now that he can get instant money from Twitch it really doesn't seem like a priority. Maybe it is some kind of self sabotage where he doesn't make the goal so he can shut it down and blame his viewers.
On one hand, it sounds retarded because he seems like the last person to turn down free money, but then I remember that he's not known for his logical decisions. If his Patreon starts crashing down even more than it already has been, though, his begging is only going to get worse.
 
Thanks to those who corrected my misconception about Leanna suggesting Washington. I thought I remembered her saying something herself about liking the tax situation in one of her game playthroughs, but I'm probably mis-remembering. My point was more that it's ridiculous to say she was kidnapped, and she wanted to move interstate herself.

This is a bit late, but I think Phil should play HunieCam Studios rather than HuniePop because chat can always give him the answers for HP and tell him what items to buy. Once you know those things all you have to do is play Bejeweled, which takes no skill at all.

HunieCam Studios is more difficult because it's a resource management game (that can devolve into a stress management game), and Phil is terrible at resource management.

You can literally pimp the girls out and you can unlock a bunch of sexy outfits so it's perfect for newly-single Phil, and should lead to some great moments. Even better, your job is to run a business that is built on making videos on the internet. Phil sucks enormously at both running businesses and making videos.
Also, it's not really the kind of game chat can hold his hand with. If you look at guides for the game (especially diamond dick ones) you'll find the instructions are long and complicated. You need to build a stable of women who cater to certain fetishes with a couple of errand girls and if you don't buy advertising and target the most popular fetishes you're boned. You need to be mindful of things like the girls' rate per hour so you don't choose girls who will bankrupt you when you're poor early on. So, basically, you have to build a successful business, so Phil is automatically at a disadvantage because he doesn't know how.

It's game over when you're in the red for over 24 hours. He is guaranteed to fail many times over.
 
DSPFuture.PNG
 
Actually, he wants you to know that he just doesn't give a shit about the haters. And to really drive home that point, he talks about it non-stop for a full 20 minutes.


This video has everything you need to know about Phil in a nutshell. In less than nineteen minutes you can listen to him manipulating his remaining fans and donators to believe that he is the innocent victim and target of hundreds of detractors, spinning the truth to make him look bad. It's also awesome that he pulls out some of the lulziest quotes every sixty seconds or so, each as a reminder that he is a top lolcow.
It is the end of the month, patreon goal is not reached yet, so it is time to guilt-trip his fans again so they open their wallets or their parents credit cards.
 
The image of a toddler on the ground thrashing a screaming comes to mind:
https://twitter.com/Drgnkiller/status/889989544128503808 (http://archive.is/afWOC)

More delusion:
https://twitter.com/Drgnkiller/status/890010719319707648 (http://archive.is/jlaQv)

Holy fucking historical revisionism, Batman:
https://twitter.com/Drgnkiller/status/890012043146907648 (http://archive.is/jlaQv)

I can't even :story:
https://twitter.com/Drgnkiller/status/890012785807163393 (http://archive.is/rGsV3)

I don't see other major, successful Youtubers begging for money from literal children and whinging every goddamn month about how they can't pay their bills despite raking in 1-2 grand on Patreon and Twitch bits. But yeah, everyone is butthurt about their favorite Youtubers not being like DarkSydePhil. Just :story:
Pewdiepie did for about a month after the addpocolypse, as a sight gag.
 
Thanks to those who corrected my misconception about Leanna suggesting Washington. I thought I remembered her saying something herself about liking the tax situation in one of her game playthroughs, but I'm probably mis-remembering. My point was more that it's ridiculous to say she was kidnapped, and she wanted to move interstate herself.

This is a bit late, but I think Phil should play HunieCam Studios rather than HuniePop because chat can always give him the answers for HP and tell him what items to buy. Once you know those things all you have to do is play Bejeweled, which takes no skill at all.

HunieCam Studios is more difficult because it's a resource management game (that can devolve into a stress management game), and Phil is terrible at resource management.

You can literally pimp the girls out and you can unlock a bunch of sexy outfits so it's perfect for newly-single Phil, and should lead to some great moments. Even better, your job is to run a business that is built on making videos on the internet. Phil sucks enormously at both running businesses and making videos.
Also, it's not really the kind of game chat can hold his hand with. If you look at guides for the game (especially diamond dick ones) you'll find the instructions are long and complicated. You need to build a stable of women who cater to certain fetishes with a couple of errand girls and if you don't buy advertising and target the most popular fetishes you're boned. You need to be mindful of things like the girls' rate per hour so you don't choose girls who will bankrupt you when you're poor early on. So, basically, you have to build a successful business, so Phil is automatically at a disadvantage because he doesn't know how.

It's game over when you're in the red for over 24 hours. He is guaranteed to fail many times over.
Pretty sure both are banned from Twitch - he's dumb, but is he that dumb?
 
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Phil said that July has been slow and said Youtube has been very low. Guess he is going to ignore that $2,000+ he made from the Emergency Stream #23.

Will we see another "SIGH I need your help guys" at the end of the month vlogs.

Always. That $2000 was to make up for lost revenue during his vacation, and god knows how much revenue he lost or what he's considering to be lost revenue. He may very well have spent $2000 on frivolous bullshit during his vacation just because he knows he can milk his audience for more at the end of the month. The question is what will his emergency be? We haven't had a good one in a while.
 
Pretty sure both are banned from Twitch - he's dumb, but is he that dumb?

There are two versions of the game. One is explicit, and the Steam version has the girls dressed in underwear rather than being naked, so not sure if that would be banned. HCS has no nudity but it does have pimping and STDs and was allowed on YouTube so it's possible Phil would think it's fine to play.

I took it upon myself to make a more accurate version of Phil's new 'Manga DSP' merch design (edited to include @El Porko Fako's suggestion):

goutyend2.png
 
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I have a weird feeling like things are speeding up. The goutularity. Each period of time has as many happenings from Phil as twice that amount of time before it.

Which to be honest I dunno what that means but I'd prefer the last 300 or so pages just go on for eternity.

Phil is the perfect balance of aloggable and entertaining. Massive amounts of each but importantly more of the latter.

Come on guys, Phil may resort to racist humor, but we don't have to. We're better than that.
Speak for yourself.
 
There are two versions of the game. One is explicit, and the Steam version has the girls dressed in underwear rather than being naked, so not sure if that would be banned. HCS has no nudity but it does have pimping and STDs and was allowed on YouTube so it's possible Phil would think it's fine to play.

I took it upon myself to make a more accurate version of Phil's new 'Manga DSP' merch design:

View attachment 253050

This is great! If I could add one thing, it would be pictures of Leanna in the garbage can.
 
I thought Leanna stuff was supposed to go into the Leanna thread? If folks think they have interesting stuff they can ask for it to be re-opened...

Objection overruled. A little bit of discussion over what Leanna's up to nowadays doesn't do any harm since it ties in with Phil and how much he was holding her back in their relationship. So long as it's not out of control just revolving around Leanna, I think some discussion is okay.

With that said, the Twitter account is 110% false. The English used is absolutely nothing like how she would type, plus there's not about 100 annoying retweets from the Onion and the fake Blockbuster account.
 
Objection overruled. A little bit of discussion over what Leanna's up to nowadays doesn't do any harm since it ties in with Phil and how much he was holding her back in their relationship. So long as it's not out of control just revolving around Leanna, I think some discussion is okay.

With that said, the Twitter account is 110% false. The English used is absolutely nothing like how she would type, plus there's not about 100 annoying retweets from the Onion and the fake Blockbuster account.
Yeah Leanna is too intertwined with Phil his psyche and future even after the breakup. Like saying shouldn't talk about Barb in Chris threads.
 
Phil said that July has been slow and said Youtube has been very low. Guess he is going to ignore that $2,000+ he made from the Emergency Stream #23.

Will we see another "SIGH I need your help guys" at the end of the month vlogs.

It is fucked up he is just pretending he didn't get that $2,000. Like 2-3 days back from his vacation he was complaining he couldn't pay his bills. I don't know if he is on autopilot and just going through his usual routine or he somehow pissed away $2,000 on his "vacation." He stayed at home, those plants were cheap, I know it has been joked about but only way I can see him blowing that much money in a week is by calling an escort service. I think he just needs that daily money to feel good about himself. Getting that $2,000 in one day was a larger version of when a fan gave him $40 and Phil was pissed because it stopped donations.

As far as getting another "REEMERGENCY" video I may be optimistic but I don't think he will pull out the black shirt and tell us his life story for the millionth time. I would bet a prestream mention everyday and the big pitch on the 31st when he does his indie marathon. I don't know how begging to hit the new goal would work the day you remind your patrons you are just getting around to the goal they paid for in MAY but that's Dsp.
 
Objection overruled. A little bit of discussion over what Leanna's up to nowadays doesn't do any harm since it ties in with Phil and how much he was holding her back in their relationship. So long as it's not out of control just revolving around Leanna, I think some discussion is okay.

With that said, the Twitter account is 110% false. The English used is absolutely nothing like how she would type, plus there's not about 100 annoying retweets from the Onion and the fake Blockbuster account.
Once "she" put out those worded posts, it was obviously not her.
The genuinely morose aspect is "i will leave and u wont hear from me again but the @ will not be deactivated" meaning Leanna can never get back her old Twitter handle from this person.
It's comparable to how Phil has his original Daksydephil YouTube channel still up but does nothing with it. Like passing by a graveyard now and then with an acquaintance's tombstone the only one you see.
 
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