- Joined
- Jan 16, 2016
MOD EDIT: 11/2/21 OP updated here.
Chantal is notable for her manic attempts to cultivate and control a glamorous image of herself as an attractive woman who is losing weight, a persona she sabotages by lying about dieting, often while visibly gaining weight, and frequently succumbing to a pathological need to relate anecdotes about her losing bowel control or having sex with homeless men. Chantal claims to have gained and lost only about 40lbs over her YouTube weight loss career, but appears to have gained a large amount, and her health has nosedived, leading many to doubt her.
She will readily give many different accounts of a narrative which contradict themselves and each other, and which were so implausible prima facie that they weren't believed anyway. The departure of much of her sanity in late 2018, co-inciding with a content doldrum in the Amberlynn Reid subforum, caused an influx of Kiwis looking for "delusional fat bitch" content, and her thread growth has sped up considerably since then.
Chantal thinks only in terms of immediate gratification. This means among other things that she's extremely lazy, spending all day lying in bed, binge-eating, and obsessively monitoring her YouTube and Instagram comment sections — often all of the above at the same time. Although often compared to Queen Deathfat ALR, Chantal crucially differs in her lack of self-awareness and her refusal to countenance any criticism: she doesn't intentionally troll viewers like ALR, she's just that dumb and that crazy. Chantal also accepts no accountability for her actions, and will delete any comment mentioning her many broken promises.
These promises are usually to do with a diet. Chantal loves the idea of being on a weight loss journey, and often fantasises publicly about her future fabulous and sexy body (this being the only motive for weight loss). What the weight loss journey amounts to is a loop, where Chantal will proclaim she's on a new diet, often pompously lecturing her viewers about health, then make no effort to adhere to it, visibly gain weight (often getting on cam junk food with no explanation) and then, when called out, react with a furious conflagration of video deletion and self-righteous ranting, followed by a period of silence before she begins again. This is known, in classical KG deathfat theory, as "the cycle".
Her diets of choice are often plant-based or vegan. So far, none of these diets has involved giving up eating meat and cheese, with one 2019 "vegan mukbang" consisting of eating actual chicken on camera. During her vegan phases, Chantal browsed cute livestock pics online and even physically visited farms and petting zoos, which she claimed helps to deter her from eating meat (it doesn't). Her preoccupation with these diets is partly wanting to emulate thin, attractive vegan social media influencers.
Foodie Beauty, for so she calls herself, is very vain. Notwithstanding her repellent appearance, Chantal applies huge amounts of makeup, often just to sit around indoors taking heavily doctored selfies for Instagram. She's balding (there is much speculation why) and so also applies black powder to her scalp, trying to hide it. Being vain, Chantal tried to start as a beauty channel, but her makeup skills are not good and she often unknowingly wears makeup intended for costume parties or drag queens, and regularly overlines her lips heavily and unevenly. Chantal is never seen without heavy concealer on her face and therewhile actually affects not to be wearing makeup. However, in an early 2019 video, she made a video without any cosmetics applied for real, and her frightening appearance indicated that ordinarily she does her hair and makeup even for her 5am "candid" chimpout videos. The money for expensive makeup and various other frivolous purchases is covered a bit by her channel income, but Chantal is known to cull money from her family and friends.
Clotso au naturale.
Vain though she is, Chantal relates disgusting anecdotes (that nobody believes) in her videos. These tales feature sex with strange men, flatulence, loss of bowel control, menstruation, and combinations thereof. The reason for this behaviour is not clear, with speculation ranging from paypig catering to severely rëtarded social development.
Chantal likes to think of herself as a gifted singer, and has uploaded numerous song covers, where between gasping breaths she coos the lyrics in a weak mezzo-soprano, completely out of tune but enjoying her diva fantasy a great deal.
Why She's a Cow
It's not because she's fat. Chantal is a crazy white trash misanthrope: she hates all men and all women. Her hatred of men is believed to stem from daddy issues (her dad walked out on her very young) and she's fond of telling stories where men lust after her. Because she hates them, though, they always somehow antagonise her, but Chantal gets the upper hand at the end like an flatulent Br'er Rabbit. Chantal wants men to be attracted to her, but sourly resents that they never are, and so resents men themselves. Chantal's hatred of other women, in a similar vein, stems from envy of their superior desirability (and bewildered resentment of their ability to avoid becoming morbidly obese), which curves around again to her obsession with male attention. Chantal's delusions about men finding her sexy, fostered by her enablers, are rubber bands keeping together the vanities, vexations and vendettas that pass for her psyche. Male attention is her psychic currency, and not getting it results in a nuclear meltdown.
Chantal is super morbidly obese, but although she thinks haters just want to make fun of her for her size, her sky-high BMI is a symptom of her general failures, and is incidental to her entertainment value. What her cow appeal stems from is her titanic delusions, her nasty disposition, her thirst for male validation, and her erroneous belief that she's smarter than everybody else — her canard that 100% of criticism is fattie-bashing proves this point. Chantal has a thread because she wants to be perceived as a clever, attractive, successful and thin personality on the internet, and she's not going to let debilitating obesity, total solipsism, subnormal reasoning skills, narc bitch tendencies, or a consummate estrangement from reality get in her way.
Chantal evidently finished high school and has completed a few units of a university degree in English Literature, which she deferred and has exhibited no intention to complete. Despite this dropout, she often touts it as evidence of her successful past, or as a viable alternative to her YouTube "career" in one of her regular internet exodus song-and-dances. She is always nebulous about her scholastic career, but her LinkedIn incoherently attempts to indicate that she was doing English Lit (undergrad and less than half-finished, but somehow "with honours") before she dropped out to focus on her current vocation of being an unemployable watermelon. LinkedIn would also have us believe this degree was part-time, even though Chantal was doing nothing else with her life then as now.
Why she deferred has never been convincingly explained, but it's not even clear why she began it. Nothing about Chantal suggests she has literary interests. She doesn't read or talk about books, and has admitted during post-fake-diet-meltdowns to never even having read the short book the diet was supposedly based on. Her writing is below the standards of an adult, let alone one who studied English Lit, and it consists almost exclusively of angry prattle written in childish first- and second- person sentences, with plenty of elementary spelling and grammar mistakes but well under quota on punctuation, and as of July 2020, no paragraph spacing has ever been witnessed, even in her longest chimpout posts. Chantal does not write or speak about subjects other than herself.
Chantal's LinkedIn account of her tertiary education speaks volumes.
Besides her mastery of English, Chantal also takes every opportunity to assure her viewers that she speaks French, especially and notoriously by trying to pronounce the word "poutine" like a Francophone. Although she comes from an ethnically French family, all written and spoken French she has demonstrated has been basic, incorrect, or both. She pronounces any word in French in a comically baroque and exaggerated manner that has been likened to how a weeaboo speaks Japanese (thus poutine is "poo-tin") yet she can't perform a guttural rhotic, which is French 101. She has ignored many requests to make a video where she speaks only French — though she claims she could. She was fired from her most recent job (in 2014; a receptionist) in part because her French wasn't good enough. In short, she can't speak French, neither Standard nor Québécois.
Chantal's People
Chantal doesn't get out much because she's an unemployed misanthrope, but the dead end she occupies has a few other residents:
Chantal, wearing drag queen lashes to a family dinner, coerces Bibi into an onscreen kiss as he looks on in despair.
Buster regards Chantal with something less than affection.
The references to Chantal's finances in this post are nebulous because her finances are. She makes some money from her channel, but also spends exorbitant sums on fast food, "diet" food, and self-care products. She also claims to pay half the rent on her apartment, and she runs a car. It has emerged that she has received money from Peetz and her family in the past, but although she never seems to face financial hardship despite her meagre channel income, nothing conclusive has emerged to state that this money cadging still occurs.
Chinny frivolously purchased this pricey hi-res camera; it lasted one video.
Chantal and Health
Chantal's health is very bad. At the outset of her channel, though morbidly obese with a CPAP and complaining of ovarian cysts, she was in good health relative to the present day. Over the last five years, she has experienced blood clots, a hysterectomy, pre-diabetes, drastically reduced mobility, difficulty breathing, constant diarrhoea and visible tooth decay.
The Weight Loss Journey
As alluded to earlier, Chinny pantomimes diets constantly, although she seems to believe she's "on" them even when she doesn't adhere to them. She has "tried" many diets, some fads, some of her own invention, but just about everything except for calorie deficit, the sole thing that causes weight loss. At her weight, her basal metabolic rate is stratospheric, but even with that, she's never lost any weight in her channel's lifetime.
For a long time, she weighed herself on old scales, which reported implausibly low weight gains and which she herself had called "broken", leading to prolific doubt about what the scales said. In July 2020, she bought some new scales, which reported she was about 400lbs, a weight dismissed as impossibly low by many. Chantal is often said to be tampering with the weigh-ins by offsetting the scales or weighing herself on the wrong surface. At any rate, we only have her self-reported weight to go on.
The Cycle
Chantal consistently rotates through predictable stages in behaviour, in what is referred to in shorthand as “the cycle”, or sometimes "the Chantal cycle" to distinguish it from ALR's one. The graphic below explains itself, but the classical cycle is generally as follows: a new diet is announced in a smug video, usually with attendant fantasies about her inevitable skinny legend lifestyle, and sermonising about her newfound health expertise. Chantal enjoys the praise and the fantasy for a few days, then, when she realises she's expected to actually lose weight by dieting, she goes silent (often citing personal problems or unsubstantiated illness) then comes back visibly fatter with a hand-wave explanation about how diet #1838 didn't work for her. This will often co-incide with a chimpout about how the people politely asking about her diet are "bullies", and will end with either minced words about continuing on the diet if Chantal can somehow find the time and energy, or else a false bravada where Chantal claims she's going to do what she wants, at which point she enters dormancy (i.e. unchecked gluttony) until the cycle begins again.
Chantal the Munchie
Chantal is a frequent guest at medical facilities in her area, with Canada’s basic healthcare being socialised and therefore costing her nothing. Often, after chimping out at the late stage in the cycle, she'll claim she’s stricken with an illness and too sick to be on YouTube for a while, which she never proves. Although she has serious health problems, she often goes to the emergency department just because she's bored and wants attention, and she has presented twice to the psychological emergency department at her local hospital... because she ate a block of cheese.
Although not a munchie by true Beauty Parlour standards, Chantal consistently plays up make-believe maladies for attention and pity, and essentially considers herself morally infallible and unculpable for past actions if she’s feeling unwell — or claiming to.
New Age, New Me
Chantal has undergone a variety of treatments for her obesity and cysts (see below) that are "alternative" to Western medicine, which she frequently denounces even though she'd be dead without it. These treatments have included everything from eating only grapes (Chantal informed us this would shrink the cysts somehow) to enlisting the aid of ghosts from the future, by means of a miracle book Chantal bought but didn't actually read. Naturally, veganism is often thrown into the mix as well. Her forays into New Age "medicine" are myriad and documented throughout the thread.
Cyster Act
Chantal has alluded many times to being afflicted with ovarian cysts, which interfere with many hormonal processes and may prevent conception and pregnancy. She initially had a diagnosis in late 2017 (see here and here) which led to her first weight loss journey in 2018 in hopes to lose 200 pounds; this was not successful. In mid-2019, Chantal announced she was having a hysterectomy. Since this was post-October 2018, the details of the surgery and her general medical state kept changing, as an almost psychotic Chantal couldn’t decide which narrative she liked best. She uploaded many mukbang videos in the lead-in to the surgery date, eating huge amounts of food and making scant reference to her upcoming procedure. She was perceived to be an extremely risky candidate for surgery, due to her copious abdominal fat and the elevated risk of death under general anaesthesia. At the beginning of October, the scheduled surgery date, Chantal uploaded a brief video in a hospital gown announcing the surgery was “postponed”, and then she spent the rest of the video talking about eating at Red Lobster.
Eventually, in late November, surgery went ahead. Details of the procedure remain nebulous, but Chantal came back from the surgery with an abdominal scar and a species of menopausal mania never before seen. She began ostentatiously farting mid-video, creating and deleting content multiple times a day, and gorging on food despite her ill health. This behaviour has persisted until the time of writing (July 2020).
Chantal's video content, such as it is, is usually boring videos of Chantal telling a made-up story and stuffing her face, or else very dull "adventure" videos where she cajoles Peetz into joining her for a banal trip to a banal location. Sometimes, Chantal is vexed by people holding her culpable for her promises and calling her a liar (or the like) and will upload a rant video, often in the wee hours of the morning (her time). In these videos, she is always effulgent with self-righteousness, and blatheringly shames her detractors before usually claiming she's quitting the internet forever (inevitably coming back inside of a day). If you ever see a video like this, archive it at once as she has been known to delete them within minutes.
Many glamorous moments have been captured in adventure videos.
Chantal does not tolerate criticism, real or imagined, on her videos, IG posts, or occasional Twitter episodes. Sometimes she attempts to censure or scold the commentors with her notion of wit, but often she will delete the comments or disable them altogether. During a post-meltdown denouement, she will often claim she is too sick or busy to make a quick video, only then to stay up til 5am deleting comments on her channel. She will also delete any past video she doesn't wish people to see, most commonly her late nite chimpout specials (see below), and YouTube revenue be damned. She also doesn't hesitate to issue strikes for illegitimate cause on "bully" channels.
Chantal scolds a booly.
The bulk of her viewers are hatewatchers or bewildered normies, but Chantal does have some real fans. The turnover for her fanbase is very high, most leaving after a cycle or two, but some of them stick it out and leave sycophantic commendation for anything she does. Many of the latter category are obviously fat fetishists. She had for some time a fat fetishist stalker from named "Jeremy Hoyles" (AKA "Mr Applevalley" in the thread, as he was from Apple Valley, CA) who left fawning praise on every video, but as of 2019 her primary suitor is one KarateJoe, who is often to be seen beneath her videos attempting to censure wisecrackers in the comments, in the brief grace period before Chantal personally purges any comment that isn't unqualified praise. Joe is also a moderator for her YouTube Lives, and rules with an iron fist.
Online Drama
Along with ALR, Chantal is a popular subject of
drama videos from the Haydur Nation, which is populated with minor cows and has its own thread here. Chantal is no stranger to online drama herself, and has even thrown down with ALR, after vainly assuming a characteristically vague tweet from Amber was directed at her. Chantal was on the defensive, as she had to trick her audience and lied about feeding a homeless man — see right for the video.
The singular maxim of this thread is "Chantal lies". Although described above, it must yet be stressed that Chantal lies about anything and about everything. This is done to create narratives that flatter herself, but Chantal isn't very bright, and either doesn't or can't remember previous versions of a given story, so the details tend to change with every telling as she comes up with revised versions that she likes more. Chantal expects every word she says to be believed, even as she contradicts herself. When she inevitably isn’t believed, she always — always — reacts with astonished fury. Although Chantal isn't honest about anything, she lies the most about a few subjects: her health, her relationships, and her diets.
They say you never step into the same river twice, and that is certainly the case for a Chantal narrative. Her constant-yet-inconsistent lying about everything means that it's often difficult or even impossible to discern what is actually happening. While an enthusiastic liar, Chantal is not a very skilled one, and often there is no version of a story that has any plausibility whatsoever. Although Chantal always fails to deceive her viewers per se, she will often succeed in hiding some of the truth, as nobody knows what's a lie and what isn't.
Chantal has a variety of bizarre tics, verbal or non-verbal, for reasons unknown. They appear most frequently when she's eating, but permeate all of her speech. Some common verbal ones are:
New to Chantal?
Written by @Strine with valuable contributions from...
@Barbarella
@Man vs persistent rat
@BerriesArnold
@Turd Blossom
@Pizza Sloth
and all the thread users who helped retrieve and provide pics, videos, and information. Friends, I raise my gravy mug to you.
Current as of 1st of August 2020.
Hello, Foodie Beauties!
Our Foodie Beauty.
Chantal Olive Marie Sarault, born March 28th 1984, aliases Foodie Beauty, Big Beautiful Me, Chantal Marie, Chinny, Clotso, Cuntal and others, is a Canadian YouTuber, whose channel was created in 2014, and who reads this thread regularly. Initially an attempted beauty channel, Chantal inadvertently became infamous for eating huge amounts of fast food in single sittings, usually while alone in her car in an empty parking lot, and all the while twitching and convulsing like a malfunctioning animatronic. Her gluttony and foolishness earned her the sobriquet "the Canadian Amberlynn Reid", but her outlandish behaviour and delusions have made her a cow in a league of her own.Our Foodie Beauty.
Chantal is notable for her manic attempts to cultivate and control a glamorous image of herself as an attractive woman who is losing weight, a persona she sabotages by lying about dieting, often while visibly gaining weight, and frequently succumbing to a pathological need to relate anecdotes about her losing bowel control or having sex with homeless men. Chantal claims to have gained and lost only about 40lbs over her YouTube weight loss career, but appears to have gained a large amount, and her health has nosedived, leading many to doubt her.
Chantal lies and has always lied constantly, unconvincingly and pointlessly about anything and everything. Just about anything she says, particularly about her health or her notions of success, is implausible and inconsistent. She was always like this, but since an event in late 2018 (more on that later), Chantal's dishonesty has become so extensive and so inconsistent in narrative that is difficult for her followers to discern what, or whether, events are transpiring.She will readily give many different accounts of a narrative which contradict themselves and each other, and which were so implausible prima facie that they weren't believed anyway. The departure of much of her sanity in late 2018, co-inciding with a content doldrum in the Amberlynn Reid subforum, caused an influx of Kiwis looking for "delusional fat bitch" content, and her thread growth has sped up considerably since then.
Chantal thinks only in terms of immediate gratification. This means among other things that she's extremely lazy, spending all day lying in bed, binge-eating, and obsessively monitoring her YouTube and Instagram comment sections — often all of the above at the same time. Although often compared to Queen Deathfat ALR, Chantal crucially differs in her lack of self-awareness and her refusal to countenance any criticism: she doesn't intentionally troll viewers like ALR, she's just that dumb and that crazy. Chantal also accepts no accountability for her actions, and will delete any comment mentioning her many broken promises.
These promises are usually to do with a diet. Chantal loves the idea of being on a weight loss journey, and often fantasises publicly about her future fabulous and sexy body (this being the only motive for weight loss). What the weight loss journey amounts to is a loop, where Chantal will proclaim she's on a new diet, often pompously lecturing her viewers about health, then make no effort to adhere to it, visibly gain weight (often getting on cam junk food with no explanation) and then, when called out, react with a furious conflagration of video deletion and self-righteous ranting, followed by a period of silence before she begins again. This is known, in classical KG deathfat theory, as "the cycle".
Her diets of choice are often plant-based or vegan. So far, none of these diets has involved giving up eating meat and cheese, with one 2019 "vegan mukbang" consisting of eating actual chicken on camera. During her vegan phases, Chantal browsed cute livestock pics online and even physically visited farms and petting zoos, which she claimed helps to deter her from eating meat (it doesn't). Her preoccupation with these diets is partly wanting to emulate thin, attractive vegan social media influencers.
Vanity
Foodie Beauty, for so she calls herself, is very vain. Notwithstanding her repellent appearance, Chantal applies huge amounts of makeup, often just to sit around indoors taking heavily doctored selfies for Instagram. She's balding (there is much speculation why) and so also applies black powder to her scalp, trying to hide it. Being vain, Chantal tried to start as a beauty channel, but her makeup skills are not good and she often unknowingly wears makeup intended for costume parties or drag queens, and regularly overlines her lips heavily and unevenly. Chantal is never seen without heavy concealer on her face and therewhile actually affects not to be wearing makeup. However, in an early 2019 video, she made a video without any cosmetics applied for real, and her frightening appearance indicated that ordinarily she does her hair and makeup even for her 5am "candid" chimpout videos. The money for expensive makeup and various other frivolous purchases is covered a bit by her channel income, but Chantal is known to cull money from her family and friends.
Clotso au naturale.
Vain though she is, Chantal relates disgusting anecdotes (that nobody believes) in her videos. These tales feature sex with strange men, flatulence, loss of bowel control, menstruation, and combinations thereof. The reason for this behaviour is not clear, with speculation ranging from paypig catering to severely rëtarded social development.
Chantal likes to think of herself as a gifted singer, and has uploaded numerous song covers, where between gasping breaths she coos the lyrics in a weak mezzo-soprano, completely out of tune but enjoying her diva fantasy a great deal.
Why She's a Cow
It's not because she's fat. Chantal is a crazy white trash misanthrope: she hates all men and all women. Her hatred of men is believed to stem from daddy issues (her dad walked out on her very young) and she's fond of telling stories where men lust after her. Because she hates them, though, they always somehow antagonise her, but Chantal gets the upper hand at the end like an flatulent Br'er Rabbit. Chantal wants men to be attracted to her, but sourly resents that they never are, and so resents men themselves. Chantal's hatred of other women, in a similar vein, stems from envy of their superior desirability (and bewildered resentment of their ability to avoid becoming morbidly obese), which curves around again to her obsession with male attention. Chantal's delusions about men finding her sexy, fostered by her enablers, are rubber bands keeping together the vanities, vexations and vendettas that pass for her psyche. Male attention is her psychic currency, and not getting it results in a nuclear meltdown.
Chantal is super morbidly obese, but although she thinks haters just want to make fun of her for her size, her sky-high BMI is a symptom of her general failures, and is incidental to her entertainment value. What her cow appeal stems from is her titanic delusions, her nasty disposition, her thirst for male validation, and her erroneous belief that she's smarter than everybody else — her canard that 100% of criticism is fattie-bashing proves this point. Chantal has a thread because she wants to be perceived as a clever, attractive, successful and thin personality on the internet, and she's not going to let debilitating obesity, total solipsism, subnormal reasoning skills, narc bitch tendencies, or a consummate estrangement from reality get in her way.
Education
Chantal showcases her advanced English skills with her patented EAITING pyramid.
Chantal showcases her advanced English skills with her patented EAITING pyramid.
Chantal evidently finished high school and has completed a few units of a university degree in English Literature, which she deferred and has exhibited no intention to complete. Despite this dropout, she often touts it as evidence of her successful past, or as a viable alternative to her YouTube "career" in one of her regular internet exodus song-and-dances. She is always nebulous about her scholastic career, but her LinkedIn incoherently attempts to indicate that she was doing English Lit (undergrad and less than half-finished, but somehow "with honours") before she dropped out to focus on her current vocation of being an unemployable watermelon. LinkedIn would also have us believe this degree was part-time, even though Chantal was doing nothing else with her life then as now.
Why she deferred has never been convincingly explained, but it's not even clear why she began it. Nothing about Chantal suggests she has literary interests. She doesn't read or talk about books, and has admitted during post-fake-diet-meltdowns to never even having read the short book the diet was supposedly based on. Her writing is below the standards of an adult, let alone one who studied English Lit, and it consists almost exclusively of angry prattle written in childish first- and second- person sentences, with plenty of elementary spelling and grammar mistakes but well under quota on punctuation, and as of July 2020, no paragraph spacing has ever been witnessed, even in her longest chimpout posts. Chantal does not write or speak about subjects other than herself.
Chantal's LinkedIn account of her tertiary education speaks volumes.
Chantal's People
Chantal doesn't get out much because she's an unemployed misanthrope, but the dead end she occupies has a few other residents:
- Two cats — Sam and BebeJunes, young and old respectively. Chantal favours Sam, and is often heard to sing nonsense songs to him. While this is something people often do in private to pets and babies, Chantal frequently adopts an unsettling ogre voice to deliver the song, and has unabashedly uploaded many such recitals to YouTube, often with Sam being restrained from escaping. BebeJunes' real name was revealed in 2020 by Peetz to be Casey, but for reasons unknown Chantal has never called her that.
- Bibi — Malan, nicknamed Bibi by Chantal, is a Senegalese manlet who was in a relationship with Chantal for about eight years; mid-2011 to early 2020, when they "broke up" (he dumped her and kicked her out). For the duration of Chantal's YT "career", Chantal tried to create the impression that she and Bibi were a happy couple, but Bibi was very reluctant to appear on camera, and when he did, he was sullen and frosty. Bibi works full time, and while they were living together it was assumed he paid the majority of expenses. Around October 2018, things with Bibi seemed to change. Chantal made mention of Bibi's sister entering the picture, and her behaviour became substantially more manic. Bibi went home to Senegal around this time for some weeks, and during this time, apparently à propos of nothing, Chantal sold her car, then rapidly got another one.
Due to whatever really happened at this time, Chantal's dishonesty, though never in short supply in the past, became so profuse, and inconsistent of narrative, that almost nothing at all she says in videos after that point was or is taken for fact. It is speculated that Bibi may have initiated a breakup before going to Senegal. Whatever did happen, he "officially" broke up with her in early February 2020, with this video uploaded on the 7th, and he told her she had to move out.
Chantal, wearing drag queen lashes to a family dinner, coerces Bibi into an onscreen kiss as he looks on in despair.
- Sister (Natalie Landry), mother (Kim Landry) and Grams — Chantal's much younger sister Nat, whom she bullied in childhood, is a hobby power-lifter who lives with her boyfriend. Nat is a normal woman in good shape, and very physically attractive compared to Chantal. Chantal often claims this sister has a mental disability and belittles her for it, but no evidence has emerged of this being the case, and many speculate Chantal is simply envious and resentful. Kim, Chantal's mother, had Chinny in her teens. Kim talks exactly like Chantal (awkwardly, disjointedly, and unsettlingly) and provided some of the parenting that created her, but is obviously a good deal more functional than Chantal. Her dog Buster hates Chantal, and is celebrated by Kiwis for always scowling and barking at her. Because Kim had Chantal in her teens, much of Chantal's parenting effectively came from her grandmother, whom Chantal continues to leech money from to this day.
Buster regards Chantal with something less than affection.
- Peetz — James, whom Chantal calls "Peetz", is Chantal's ex-fiancé, and ex- and current housemate who works for a call centre. Chantal cheated on Peetz with Bibi in 2011, but they have remained on apparently good terms, and even moved in together (again) in 2020. Peetz is a balding, fat recluse who spends all night chimping out online; traits he and Chantal have in common. Peetz is a zealous SJW, and counsels Chantal with woke sophistry to try to arm her against the haydurs, but it doesn't seem to stick. When Bibi dumped Chantal and made her leave, Peetz immediately agreed to move in with Chantal, but the "luxury apartment" they got together was something of a poisoned chalice: because the COVID-19 disaster forced them to be cooped up together all day, tensions mounted between the two, not helped by Chantal's filthiness and its effect on their brand new white trash furnishings, and as of July 2020 tensions are mounting. Because of his SJW sperging and obsequiousness to Chantal, Peetz is regarded in the thread as a loser and a simp, but he is generally held to have achieved more than Chantal.
- Bibi's sister Gnima — little is known about this figure, but Gnima was first mentioned in late 2018, in strange videos where Chantal seemed upset and explained that Gnima was coming to stay. Chantal gave wildly inconsistent reports of whether and for how long Gnima was staying with them, and she inexplicably sold her car, buying a new one shortly afterwards. Chantal became more furtive with her eating when Gnima entered the picture, ashamed of pigging out in front of her, and even went so far as to erect a tacky faux-Japanese screen in the apartment to shield her gluttony from view; the screen vanished after Gnima left. Chantal's insane behaviour surrounding Gnima led some Kiwis to speculate Malan's "sister" was a new woman he'd run off with, but this was debunked.
A Note on Finances
The references to Chantal's finances in this post are nebulous because her finances are. She makes some money from her channel, but also spends exorbitant sums on fast food, "diet" food, and self-care products. She also claims to pay half the rent on her apartment, and she runs a car. It has emerged that she has received money from Peetz and her family in the past, but although she never seems to face financial hardship despite her meagre channel income, nothing conclusive has emerged to state that this money cadging still occurs.
Chinny frivolously purchased this pricey hi-res camera; it lasted one video.
Chantal and Health
Chantal's health is very bad. At the outset of her channel, though morbidly obese with a CPAP and complaining of ovarian cysts, she was in good health relative to the present day. Over the last five years, she has experienced blood clots, a hysterectomy, pre-diabetes, drastically reduced mobility, difficulty breathing, constant diarrhoea and visible tooth decay.
The Weight Loss Journey
As alluded to earlier, Chinny pantomimes diets constantly, although she seems to believe she's "on" them even when she doesn't adhere to them. She has "tried" many diets, some fads, some of her own invention, but just about everything except for calorie deficit, the sole thing that causes weight loss. At her weight, her basal metabolic rate is stratospheric, but even with that, she's never lost any weight in her channel's lifetime.
For a long time, she weighed herself on old scales, which reported implausibly low weight gains and which she herself had called "broken", leading to prolific doubt about what the scales said. In July 2020, she bought some new scales, which reported she was about 400lbs, a weight dismissed as impossibly low by many. Chantal is often said to be tampering with the weigh-ins by offsetting the scales or weighing herself on the wrong surface. At any rate, we only have her self-reported weight to go on.
The Cycle
Chantal consistently rotates through predictable stages in behaviour, in what is referred to in shorthand as “the cycle”, or sometimes "the Chantal cycle" to distinguish it from ALR's one. The graphic below explains itself, but the classical cycle is generally as follows: a new diet is announced in a smug video, usually with attendant fantasies about her inevitable skinny legend lifestyle, and sermonising about her newfound health expertise. Chantal enjoys the praise and the fantasy for a few days, then, when she realises she's expected to actually lose weight by dieting, she goes silent (often citing personal problems or unsubstantiated illness) then comes back visibly fatter with a hand-wave explanation about how diet #1838 didn't work for her. This will often co-incide with a chimpout about how the people politely asking about her diet are "bullies", and will end with either minced words about continuing on the diet if Chantal can somehow find the time and energy, or else a false bravada where Chantal claims she's going to do what she wants, at which point she enters dormancy (i.e. unchecked gluttony) until the cycle begins again.
Chantal the Munchie
Chantal is a frequent guest at medical facilities in her area, with Canada’s basic healthcare being socialised and therefore costing her nothing. Often, after chimping out at the late stage in the cycle, she'll claim she’s stricken with an illness and too sick to be on YouTube for a while, which she never proves. Although she has serious health problems, she often goes to the emergency department just because she's bored and wants attention, and she has presented twice to the psychological emergency department at her local hospital... because she ate a block of cheese.
Although not a munchie by true Beauty Parlour standards, Chantal consistently plays up make-believe maladies for attention and pity, and essentially considers herself morally infallible and unculpable for past actions if she’s feeling unwell — or claiming to.
New Age, New Me
Chantal has undergone a variety of treatments for her obesity and cysts (see below) that are "alternative" to Western medicine, which she frequently denounces even though she'd be dead without it. These treatments have included everything from eating only grapes (Chantal informed us this would shrink the cysts somehow) to enlisting the aid of ghosts from the future, by means of a miracle book Chantal bought but didn't actually read. Naturally, veganism is often thrown into the mix as well. Her forays into New Age "medicine" are myriad and documented throughout the thread.
Cyster Act
Chantal has alluded many times to being afflicted with ovarian cysts, which interfere with many hormonal processes and may prevent conception and pregnancy. She initially had a diagnosis in late 2017 (see here and here) which led to her first weight loss journey in 2018 in hopes to lose 200 pounds; this was not successful. In mid-2019, Chantal announced she was having a hysterectomy. Since this was post-October 2018, the details of the surgery and her general medical state kept changing, as an almost psychotic Chantal couldn’t decide which narrative she liked best. She uploaded many mukbang videos in the lead-in to the surgery date, eating huge amounts of food and making scant reference to her upcoming procedure. She was perceived to be an extremely risky candidate for surgery, due to her copious abdominal fat and the elevated risk of death under general anaesthesia. At the beginning of October, the scheduled surgery date, Chantal uploaded a brief video in a hospital gown announcing the surgery was “postponed”, and then she spent the rest of the video talking about eating at Red Lobster.
Eventually, in late November, surgery went ahead. Details of the procedure remain nebulous, but Chantal came back from the surgery with an abdominal scar and a species of menopausal mania never before seen. She began ostentatiously farting mid-video, creating and deleting content multiple times a day, and gorging on food despite her ill health. This behaviour has persisted until the time of writing (July 2020).
Chantal's Online Presence
Chantal's video content, such as it is, is usually boring videos of Chantal telling a made-up story and stuffing her face, or else very dull "adventure" videos where she cajoles Peetz into joining her for a banal trip to a banal location. Sometimes, Chantal is vexed by people holding her culpable for her promises and calling her a liar (or the like) and will upload a rant video, often in the wee hours of the morning (her time). In these videos, she is always effulgent with self-righteousness, and blatheringly shames her detractors before usually claiming she's quitting the internet forever (inevitably coming back inside of a day). If you ever see a video like this, archive it at once as she has been known to delete them within minutes.
Many glamorous moments have been captured in adventure videos.
Chantal does not tolerate criticism, real or imagined, on her videos, IG posts, or occasional Twitter episodes. Sometimes she attempts to censure or scold the commentors with her notion of wit, but often she will delete the comments or disable them altogether. During a post-meltdown denouement, she will often claim she is too sick or busy to make a quick video, only then to stay up til 5am deleting comments on her channel. She will also delete any past video she doesn't wish people to see, most commonly her late nite chimpout specials (see below), and YouTube revenue be damned. She also doesn't hesitate to issue strikes for illegitimate cause on "bully" channels.
Chantal scolds a booly.
The bulk of her viewers are hatewatchers or bewildered normies, but Chantal does have some real fans. The turnover for her fanbase is very high, most leaving after a cycle or two, but some of them stick it out and leave sycophantic commendation for anything she does. Many of the latter category are obviously fat fetishists. She had for some time a fat fetishist stalker from named "Jeremy Hoyles" (AKA "Mr Applevalley" in the thread, as he was from Apple Valley, CA) who left fawning praise on every video, but as of 2019 her primary suitor is one KarateJoe, who is often to be seen beneath her videos attempting to censure wisecrackers in the comments, in the brief grace period before Chantal personally purges any comment that isn't unqualified praise. Joe is also a moderator for her YouTube Lives, and rules with an iron fist.
Along with ALR, Chantal is a popular subject of
drama videos from the Haydur Nation, which is populated with minor cows and has its own thread here. Chantal is no stranger to online drama herself, and has even thrown down with ALR, after vainly assuming a characteristically vague tweet from Amber was directed at her. Chantal was on the defensive, as she had to trick her audience and lied about feeding a homeless man — see right for the video.
Chantal Lies
The singular maxim of this thread is "Chantal lies". Although described above, it must yet be stressed that Chantal lies about anything and about everything. This is done to create narratives that flatter herself, but Chantal isn't very bright, and either doesn't or can't remember previous versions of a given story, so the details tend to change with every telling as she comes up with revised versions that she likes more. Chantal expects every word she says to be believed, even as she contradicts herself. When she inevitably isn’t believed, she always — always — reacts with astonished fury. Although Chantal isn't honest about anything, she lies the most about a few subjects: her health, her relationships, and her diets.
They say you never step into the same river twice, and that is certainly the case for a Chantal narrative. Her constant-yet-inconsistent lying about everything means that it's often difficult or even impossible to discern what is actually happening. While an enthusiastic liar, Chantal is not a very skilled one, and often there is no version of a story that has any plausibility whatsoever. Although Chantal always fails to deceive her viewers per se, she will often succeed in hiding some of the truth, as nobody knows what's a lie and what isn't.
Chantal's Tics
Chantal has a variety of bizarre tics, verbal or non-verbal, for reasons unknown. They appear most frequently when she's eating, but permeate all of her speech. Some common verbal ones are:
- "HEE HEE!" — sometimes known as "the cackle", this witchy ejaculation is sometimes used to punctuate something Chantal believes is funny, but is just as often heard for no reason. "HA!" also appears in the same circumstances.
- "SHH! I said... SHH! — probably her most notorious tic; delivered with great force, always while eating sodium-rich food, and generally when alone. Some kiwis think she's shushing a chiding voice in her head who tells her she's eating herself to death. As of late 2019, she has been faking this tic in videos to try to pretend she was always faking it, but the real McCoy is obvious when it appears.
- "SHAM!" - This is what she calls her cat, Sam. It is generally delivered in a demonic contralto.
- "Beezin' " - A solipsistic neologism meaning "misbehaving". Sam often finds himself accused of beezing, and despite the negative connotations, Chantal claims he has "VIP status" at "The Beezoire".
Before You Post...
New to Chantal?
- Don't post about your own weight loss or eating/exercise habits. This thread is not about you, and nobody here cares. If you feel the need to enumerate reasons you are superior to Chantal, then there actually aren't any.
- Don’t make posts attempting to address Chantal directly. Chantal does read this thread, but the only counsel she keeps is her own, and the purpose of this thread isn't to help her. We’re not here to save lives. we’re here to mock the people who can’t be bothered to save their own. Likewise, don’t write spiels about how you hate her. If you have an insight about her cow behaviour, by all means post it, but harangueing her in this thread is a waste of everybody’s time.
- Try not to post something that's been said already. If someone has said what you want to say, give them an Agree rating and then come up with another insight instead of shitposting.
- When someone comes in here being a powerleveling douche, or trying to start fights, don't engage with them, just report them.
- Bear always in mind that no information that Chantal presents, in any medium, textually, verbally or visually, should be believed until she proves it.
- As with any thread, the wisest thing to do before posting is to read, read, read. Get an idea of the tone and culture of the thread if you wish to usefully participate and receive a warm welcome.
FAQs
- Why doesn't Chantal get WLS?
- She wouldn't be approved for it, as she can't stick to any diet for any amount of time. She has also fucked the public health system around before, sabotaging her chances, and she can't afford to have it done privately.
- Why is Chantal fixated on veganism?
- When Chantal was 18, her mother sent her to a vegan camp called Katimavik where she was forced to do physical activity and eat vegan food, resulting in the only substantial weight loss she's ever had. It's speculated that this is why she's so into veganism.
- Have she or any of her real-life acquaintances posted here?
- There are no confirmed posts by Chantal, but a user named manicunt made some very revealing posts about her. manicunt is how we know Chantal bullied her sister, among other things.
- Has she ever been diagnosed with OCD/BPD/et cetera?
- No legitimate diagnosis of a psychological disorder is known to Kiwi Farms.
- What is her current weight?
- As of July 2020, she claimed it was just under 400lbs.
- Is [any unproven thing Chantal claims] true?
- No. Chantal lies.
- Why does she try to seem like a glamorous influencer and then narrate nearly shitting herself on camera?
- Why indeed.
Written by @Strine with valuable contributions from...
@Barbarella
@Man vs persistent rat
@BerriesArnold
@Turd Blossom
@Pizza Sloth
and all the thread users who helped retrieve and provide pics, videos, and information. Friends, I raise my gravy mug to you.
Current as of 1st of August 2020.
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