DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[Rupin]

Lmao get fucked

I can't say that he is wrong there. Youtube is fucking up a whole lot content creators with their policies.

I guess fat boy is going to have to get an actual job now.

 

[DiabeticSP]

he seems to instead focus on "engagement" which I find ridiculous for a guy who basically plans to disable comments and ratings for his videos

Focus on engagement when he admits that's not what drives revenue. What the fuck.

 

[TheyCallItNPD]

I thought 'engagement' meant the same thing as retention time = the amount of a video that the viewer watches before clicking away or skipping through.

Youtube's algorithm for promoting and recommending videos has favoured retention time since around 2013. This encourages the content creator to make good content instead of pumping out garbage. You have to make sure that each 'episode' is engaging from start to finish. (Interestingly enough, it is believed that comments, likes and dislikes have almost no effect on the algorithm. It doesn't matter what the audience is saying about your video, as long as they watch most of it).

Phil has never cared in the slightest about engagement/retention. For a while I thought he was genuinely ignorant about Youtube switching to the retention model, but recently I heard Phil say stuff that proves he knows all about it. He just doesn't want to comply. Phil would rather be angry at the 'book-smart' programmers at Google for making a system that doesn't suit Phil, rather than try to make content that suits the system.

I once heard Phil almost literally say: "Why should I have to make engaging content?"

As for the length of his videos, I don't know, it gets complicated. It's true that gamer Youtubers benefitted the most from the engagement model because 25-minute videos are a sweet spot. But if you make 25-minute videos you need to care about making them engaging, and that means editing! Pacing, structure, beginnings and endings! Phil wouldn't get any better retention just by letting his raw kaahntent OBS clips run to 25 minutes.

 

[ChickenSkinBeanbag]

Of course the man whose ex bought a fake ring for herself has problems with engagement

 

[PL 879]

That may not be necessarily 100% his fault - some people do get an older look because of genetics. Of course, his lifestyle of poor eating habits, poor hygiene and constant stressing over mah bilths didn't do his appearance any favors. Ben Shapiro only has to stress about /pol/acks sending him Happy Merchant memes and telling him about how he has to be sent to the gas chamber.

Genetics can play something of a role in appearing older prematurely, but those effects can be staved off through a clean diet, regular exercise, adequate exposure to sunshine, and a sense of peace in one's spirit. I know a few people who are my age that look 20 years older because they are lacking in all these areas.
Phil needs a complete lifestyle alteration, as he looks like he has aged 10 years just in the last two.

 

[Um Oh Ah Yeah]

His face got really puffy really quickly. Too much sodium (haha), rapid weight gain, or both?

 

[DarkSydePundit]

Of course the man whose ex bought a fake ring for herself has problems with engagement

If I would be DSP and in his position first I would ̶f̶̶u̶̶c̶̶k̶̶i̶̶n̶̶g̶̶ ̶̶k̶̶i̶̶l̶̶l̶̶ ̶̶m̶̶y̶̶s̶̶e̶̶l̶̶f̶̶ ̶ stream myself watching my own videos in a playlist and post the link in the chat.

This way I can be an even bigger narcissist by laughing at my own videos and viewers have the option to give me EVEN MORE money by watching the videos with me in the background.

Nobody will tell me that I don't interact with my viewers anymore ACK ACK ACK

This will increase the engagement by 9001% and together WE will save my business *cough*

WIN WIN SITUATION, ALRIGHT? *SNORT*

 

[Near]

I can't say that he is wrong there. Youtube is fucking up a whole lot content creators with their policies.

I guess fat boy is going to have to get an actual job now.

At this point, he's cheated so many systems, threw so many people under the bus and got away with shit, that screw it. YT can collapse on itself if it means he gets swallowed along with them. Though He's probably gonna run off to twitch and host on vid.me next.

 

[Zim]

This just shows that Phil knows his YT videos get so low views that he is upset that his 20 parts a day will not reach 1k views in a week. His videos BARELY make 1,000 views in a week, yet its Youtubes fault his channel is dying and not his

That's terrible. I tried doing Youtube a few years ago and my gaming channel was averaging around 300 - 400 views per video per week with a lot less subs. He must have a ton of dead subs or they grew up and found out he actually is cancer but never bothered to unsub. I'd be interested to see what the average time watched on each video is.

 

[bird]

That's terrible. I tried doing Youtube a few years ago and my gaming channel was averaging around 300 - 400 views per video per week with a lot less subs. He must have a ton of dead subs or they grew up and found out he actually is cancer but never bothered to unsub. I'd be interested to see what the average time watched on each video is.

I'd imagine getting hammered with 10-30 videos every day when you get off the bus from school and still have to manage time to do your home work and play ROBLOX™ with your friends then eat dinner while still getting yelled at by mom, then still have to watch DSP's THREE stupid twitch streams a day can be really tiring to manage every day

 

[DiabeticSP]

Someone really needs to make us a pie chart of his catch phrases.

I'd love to see "I was blocking" "I didn't do that" and "ack ack ack" broken down statistically.

Edit: Fuck it I'll do it if someone can give me a not entirely unbearable playthrough (Sonic Mania maybe?) I'll sample 3-4 hours in the middle (not counting pre-stream and such) and whip something up this weekend.

 

[Lagombi_fan]

Someone really needs to make us a pie chart of his catch phrases.

I'd love to see "I was blocking" "I didn't do that" and "ack ack ack" broken down statistically.

Edit: Fuck it I'll do it if someone can give me a not entirely unbearable playthrough (Sonic Mania maybe?) I'll sample 3-4 hours in the middle (not counting pre-stream and such) and whip something up this weekend.

Try the Ocarina of Time playthhrough. It's not too painful if you don't know the game that well.

 

[DiabeticSP]

Try the Ocarina of Time playthhrough. It's not too painful if you don't know the game that well.

I don't, so I might give it a go. I think Sonic might be better as its more recent and from the tiny bit I've watched the salt is high.

Basically I think I'll just make a chart of 'common phrases' as he says them and then add how many times he uses a variant of it.

I might keep some basic 'time bitching and not playing' numbers too.

 

[ChickenSkinBeanbag]

I'd imagine getting hammered with 10-30 videos every day when you get off the bus from school and still have to manage time to do your home work and play ROBLOX™ with your friends then eat dinner while still getting yelled at by mom, then still have to watch DSP's THREE stupid twitch streams a day can be really tiring to manage every day

Kind of makes me wonder how many kids have given up their hopes and dreams because of Phil. Why bother doing well in school or having a social life when your good pal DSP makes money playing video games all day? DSP doesn't have friends. DSP doesn't need a stupid college degree. He just gets to have fun all day long.

 

[Freshtodeath]

I've found that nowadays the longer video the better. Let's say i love idubbz, if i see a 30 min video in my inbox i get really excited. Dsp's content isn't engaging so this doesn't work for him. When he used to be more charismatic a 10 min video was digestable but him now? No way

 

[Prince_of_Rewards]

At this point, he's cheated so many systems, threw so many people under the bus and got away with shit, that screw it. YT can collapse on itself if it means he gets swallowed along with them. Though He's probably gonna run off to twitch and host on vid.me next.

He rails violently against Youtube’s constant policy and method changes, to the point of sheer harassment at this point. The things he’s said about Google and Youtube’s DEVs is incorrigible, regardless of whether or not it hampers him. Youtube changes, ushered down because of ad dollars tapering off or drying up, have affected every content creator. Phil is nothing special. If he had agreements and partnerships in place, he would’ve been somewhat insulated from measures changes, but no. As you said, he has burnt too many people and companies in his child-like wake. What I can not wait to happen is for Youtube to become nothing more than a repository for him; no ads being featured on his videos or what little money he does receive barely enough to cover a snack box and popcorn at the movies. I don’t believe in karma, but I do believe in energies. What energies one puts into a thing or activity is typically returned tenfold. Youtube needs to shit Phil out, and have him move to Twitch. There he can prostitute his slow, uncharismatic streams to his pimps in Europe.

 

[Bridge to Nowhere]

He rails violently against Youtube’s constant policy and method changes, to the point of sheer harassment at this point. The things he’s said about Google and Youtube’s DEVs is incorrigible, regardless of whether or not it hampers him. Youtube changes, ushered down because of ad dollars tapering off or drying up, have affected every content creator. Phil is nothing special. If he had agreements and partnerships in place, he would’ve been somewhat insulated from measures changes, but no. As you said, he has burnt too many people and companies in his child-like wake. What I can not wait to happen is for Youtube to become nothing more than a repository for him; no ads being featured on his videos or what little money he does receive barely enough to cover a snack box and popcorn at the movies. I don’t believe in karma, but I do believe in energies. What energies one puts into a thing or activity is typically returned tenfold. Youtube needs to shit Phil out, and have him move to Twitch. There he can prostitute his slow, uncharismatic streams to his pimps in Europe.

If he decides to abandon YouTube entirely, then that'll just be another step in him becoming all the things that he hated and criticized before. I guess he's too thick to see how funny that is.

 

[DiabeticShitheadPhil]

I don't, so I might give it a go. I think Sonic might be better as its more recent and from the tiny bit I've watched the salt is high.

Basically I think I'll just make a chart of 'common phrases' as he says them and then add how many times he uses a variant of it.

I might keep some basic 'time bitching and not playing' numbers too.

Allow me to help you out a bit with a few starter entries

• I was blocking! (Usually said when he was not blocking and when you can hear him mashing buttons with his fat fingers)
  
• C'mon!
  
• I'm pressing buttons!
• I wasn't doing anything! (Same as "I was blocking", you can usually hear him pressing buttons)
  
• Okay! (Said when he's frustrated at getting his ass kicked online, as if to say "Okay, that totally wouldn't work offline")
• That totally wouldn't work offline (An excuse)
  
• ", okay?" (Will randomly end sentences with this)
• ", right?" (Will also randomly end sentences with this, makes him sound like he's trying to convince everyone that what he's saying is true)
• Stupid online play
• <insert random complaint about a game's netcode that Phil has no knowledge of here>
• Durr hurrr low kick combo low kick combo low kick combo low kick combo low kick combo (with his controller up to the camera as he "imitates" what he thinks his opponent was doing the whole match)

Also, as a programmer myself, hearing Phil shit-talk YouTube's devs infuriates me to no end. The fat fuck has no clue how much work and effort goes into maintaining something like YouTube, yet that doesn't stop him from acting like he could do it better.

 

[PieceofShet]

Allow me to help you out a bit with a few starter entries

• I was blocking! (Usually said when he was not blocking and when you can hear him mashing buttons with his fat fingers)
  
• C'mon!
  
• I'm pressing buttons!
• I wasn't doing anything! (Same as "I was blocking", you can usually hear him pressing buttons)
  
• Okay! (Said when he's frustrated at getting his ass kicked online, as if to say "Okay, that totally wouldn't work offline")
• That totally wouldn't work offline (An excuse)
  
• ", okay?" (Will randomly end sentences with this)
• ", right?" (Will also randomly end sentences with this, makes him sound like he's trying to convince everyone that what he's saying is true)
• Stupid online play
• <insert random complaint about a game's netcode that Phil has no knowledge of here>
• Durr hurrr low kick combo low kick combo low kick combo low kick combo low kick combo (with his controller up to the camera as he "imitates" what he thinks his opponent was doing the whole match)

My favourite is It didnt come out/Dropped my input.

 

[Lagombi_fan]

My personal fave is when he sees something he doesn't understand and says that it's bugged, even if it's clearly a game mechanic.