- Joined
- Sep 18, 2017
This thread has taught me one thing:
Where technology should be headed:
The reality:
Where technology should be headed:
The reality:
Plagued Waifu culture - Cartoon fuckpillows and the men (and women) who love them
- Thread starter sugoi-chan
- Start date
H
HY 140
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kiwifarms.net
"I bet there will be hoveroards in 2017"-us in 1985
- Joined
- Jan 7, 2016
>those people who used non-transparent images to attend the wedding
Disgusting. Have they no shame?
Disgusting. Have they no shame?
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- Joined
- Oct 12, 2015
It's like what CinemaSins says: The power of boners is stronger!
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
This has actually been proposed as a solution to the Fermi Paradoxon ("If there are so many stars in the galaxy, why haven't advanced aliens dropped by yet?") -- as soon as a civilization achieves spaceflight capabilities, virtual reality also rolls around, and thus the advanced aliens are all busy using cyberspace/holodecks/etc. for whatever gives them the maximum amount of pleasure (orgies with several anime waifu, debating Plato, shooting virtual smack, baking cupcakes with cartoon ponies, exploring the last mysteries of space and time, etc.) instead of heading out to the stars.
- Joined
- Apr 30, 2017
Huh, so this is what Dr. Krieger's wedding would have been like if not for New York state's inability to "deal with it".
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
This actually raises some tough theological questions.
How advanced would an Anime girl simulation have to be for this marriage to be legit? It would probably be legit if the simulation can be baptized, and, as most Catholics would argue, in order to be baptized she must be able to know God. But how do we know she knows Him?
BTW is the priest just a pre-recorded voice plus animation or is there a person controlling him? If so, is said person authorized to unite two persons in loving matrimony (actual priest or sea captain)?
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
The anime girl simulation would be advanced enough just to remind one how lonely their life is as they try to pet their underaged cartoon bride.
Diesel Boogaloo
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2017
Undercover Waifu
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 26, 2017
I should make up a waifu story and get in on that shit. Just lurking that discord must be amazingly entertaining.
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- Joined
- May 30, 2014
I've been debating the optimal time to post this, and I feel now is. Here's a short story about what would happen with a "real" waifu my girlfriend wrote as a writing prompt awhile back. It's been gathering dust on our harddrives for months now so now's as good a time as any.
It all started on September 5th, 2016, with a post he saw on /r/waifuism. "What if you could meet your waifu irl?"
The question had been posed before... but it was thistime that he started to really think about it. Mostly because of one comment, one naysayer present among the many people whose responses amounted to "Yes, without question!"
"No. Alot of the reason that I love Melia has to do with the way she responds to her situation in the game, and if she were in real life she wouldnt have that. Plus she might be different irl than she is in the game since its a different universe and that might be bad too."
It was an alien concept to him... what person that regularly posted on /r/waifuism wouldn't want their waifu to be reality? There were all those images that people made with their waifu pressing sadly against a glass screen, pining over the lost love they would never get to experience due to their existence as a fictional character (he hated to use those words but this was one of the times he had to be frank about it). The dakis weren't enough. Nobody ever really admitted it, but it was obvious. There were the domestic memes, where you'd talk about how you and your waifu get along on a day-to-day basis. Then there was the guy who had actually gone and married Ruby Rose ...
Why wouldn't anyone want all of that to actually be real?
And that's why he went back to school for chemistry while simultaneously giving himself a refresher on how to program an intelligent computer ...
---
A few years later his computer was complete. The Waifu-Maker, he called it, although he knew it should have a better name than that because it was morethan that. It was a Saturday morning in June when he sat down to test it, since he was off work that day. Before doing so, he logged into /r/waifuism briefly...
"I've finally finished the computer I've been talking about. The one that makes waifus real. I'm going to start with my waifu Aiko and if that works I can send anyone interested the computer plans, but you'll have to build it yourself. Wish me luck!"
Though he wouldn't see them for a month, the fellow waifuists responded to the thread with words of support... except for one familiar poster who would say, "Be careful man. This might not turn out to be the starlight and rainbows you expect it to be."
Even if he had seen it, he wasn't going to listen. How could he? He'd gone back to school for this and devoted years of his life to it. What would he be now if he decided not to go through with it when it was right in front of him and all he had to do was hook up his laptop to it and plug in a few URLs and some code he'd written...?
So he grabbed a biscuit while the computer whirred in front of him and the large glass-walled pod attached to it filled with smoke ...
---
In a few hours, the computer dinged like an oven. Wisps of smoke were still rising from the pod, but it dissipated quickly in the many fans he had set up around the contraption. Now that it was over, though, the smoke began to clear, and the glass of the pod started to be transparent once again, revealing ...
A human girl about five-foot-five with long silvery-blonde hair, sky-blue eyes, and the most beautiful smile he had ever seen stepped out from behind the glass and into his spare room.
She was naked, and that was the first thing he noticed as she moved. He felt a tightening in his pants, and cursed himself for not covering up the pod and having clothes available for her. This was his waifu and the minute she stepped into the 3D world he was already looking at her in a sexual manner. This was no way to treat a lady!
She looked at him, though, looked at him with her blue eyes, with the innocence that had defined her in her show, and suddenly it didn't matter anymore, none of it did. She was here, she was here with him, and now he could talk to her and laugh with her and eat with her and cuddle with her and touch her and do all of the things he had ever wanted to do with a girl and more besides. And it wasn't someone else, it wasn't a 3D replacement for his beloved Aiko, it was Aiko, it was a girl with Aiko's hair and Aiko's eyes and Aiko's breasts and all of Aiko's personality. It was truly his waifu made flesh. And he would love her forever.
---
Aiko was from an anime called Diamond Destiny,about a group of high school girls who decided to form a baseball team in order to prove that girls could play baseball just as well as guys could. There was a manga, too, but he had never read it. The lack of color and movement kind of put him off, and he had tried to read the first volume once but gotten bored with it rather quickly. The clear, crisp animation style was much more appealing to him.
Aiko played third base. She was a very good defensive player, though that came at the cost of her offensive skills being rather weak. Almost every episode had a gag where she would go to bat, swing at the ball, and miss in increasingly absurd ways... though every once in a while she did manage to hit a single. She was ditzy, Aiko was, and sometimes didn't realize she had made a mistake until much later... such as that time in season 2 when she was in charge of giving the bus driver directions to a game and they ended up in a forest in the complete opposite direction, leading to a short arc where the team had to make use of their baseball skills to survive the jungle when the bus broke down.
To him, the ditzy aspect was adorable. It meant he could smile and chuckle every time she did something like that, or accidentally drink all the root beer, or forget to bring the team's bats to a playoff game, or get distracted by the beautiful batter from the private school and fail to catch the ball he hit right toward her...
But beyond that, she was a very loyal teammate who always did her best for the team even as they were frustrated with her at times, and he liked that. It showed good character, he thought, and he loved for it. That was why she was here.
His salary was enough to support the both of them, so her working was a non-issue. Besides, she was 17 in canon, and so she couldn't do a lot in the world yet... especially because he had no records for her that could prove she was supposed to be 17 when the time she was "born" was on June 14th, 2020, at 11:43 AM. So she stayed at home and watched TV (she liked sports a lot, of course) and played video games and generally hung out while he went to the office.
In the first few weeks, her actions proved that his computer creation had been successful. She drank all the root beer and she failed to comprehend moving objects and she broke his lamp once and she burned herself with hot water
but she would collapse into his arms at the end of the day, murmuring softly as he ran his fingers through her beautiful shimmering hair, the hair of an angel, and he couldn't help but love her, love everything about her, love that she drank all the root beer and couldn't comprehend moving objects and broke his lamp once and burned herself with hot water because it was Aiko that did all those things and Aiko was his love, his one, his only, his waifu come to life, and for that reason alone he could never not love her.
---
A month after the experiment had been successful, he finally returned to /r/waifuism to post about it. Turns out a couple users had been worried when he never reported back after announcing he was starting the experiment... it would be fine now, though.
"Experiment was a success. Aiko is now living with me and she's just like she is in Diamond Destiny. She looks just the same too! I love her so much."
And then he linked to the Dropbox folder with the plans and code for the computer he had built. Everyone else deserved to have a waifu too, after all.
He had the day off work, so he stuck around on the subreddit a while, answering questions about Aiko and their life together. At one point he took a photograph of Aiko sipping from a can of root beer on their couch and uploaded it, and the other waifuists agreed with his opinion that she had turned out really well. They liked the look of her and now they were more convinced to build their own computers and make their waifus reality too.
Of course ... there was still the one single doubter, and he suspected that as long as Aiko was alive that this doubter would continue to doubt.
"But shes not a real woman shes just your waifu. I mean theres a difference between someone whose spent alot of time in the world and someone whose personality is taken from a different world. I love Melia but it wouldnt work in the real world because shes from the Bionis and not Earth. I dont see how it would be different for someone else."
The poster was wrong ... wasn't he? He had to be. Aiko was here with him now, and yes, she wasn't at her high school and she wasn't playing baseball and she wasn't with Sakura and Mei and her other friends but that didn't matter, did it, because she still had Aiko's personality and she didn't - see, the important thing was she didn't miss them, he'd programmed it that way, she was here to love him and exist in his world and not in a high school in Japan.
That was all he needed and that was all he ever would need.
---
They had sex for the first time that night after the return to Reddit.
It sounded stupid, he knew, when he thought about it. She'd been with him for a month and he hadn't - hadn't done - anything with her yet, why not? He loved her, right?, and sometimes in the months and years before the computer was finished he'd take the daki he had of her, the one he'd commissioned, with her half undressed in her baseball uniform with the top of her shirt pulled down and unbuttoned such that it uncovered one of her perfect breasts and the bottom of shirt pulled up so that he could see her belly button and her striped pants pulled down just enough that he could see her bright red panties, and he'd take that daki and he'd cuddle close to it and touch it and imagine that he was touching her, skin to skin, making love.
But she was real, and it was different here ... he had never had sex before, had never touched or kissed a girl or gotten one naked - Aiko had come out naked but that was different! She would move and she would make noise and it was a little uncomfortable to him that he was now dealing with the concept of a real girlto be the recipient of his sexual desire. What if Aiko didn't like the way he touched her? What if she left him? (He didn't think his programming had left any possibility of that, but he couldn't be sure.) Or what if he couldn't get it up for her? Or - or -
all of these thoughts were running through his head as she came to bed that night after showering. Her beautiful hair shimmered in the low light of the bedroom as she crawled into bed beside him and lay next to him and he began obediently brought his arm underneath her to hold her and began to stroke her hair, listening to her murmurs...
Some people on the thread had asked. "Have you had sex yet?" "Is it good?" and he had to admit that they hadn't. Which was the stupid part, the weird part. He'd brought her to life, so why couldn't he make love to her just like he'd always dreamed of...? She'd been here for a month, didn't people usually at least kissbefore then? Real kisses. Like, lips to lips. Not ... lips to her hair or her sleeping body in the morning.
Tonight was different. Tonight he wanted to do it, and he knew she would never initiate it, not until after the first time, because that was in her personality and her programming. If anything was going to happen it was going to be him, and it was going to be him. Tonight. Now.
And so he took his other arm and reached over to squeeze her breast.
She gasped, and he nearly panicked and jolted away from her, a million terrible thoughts running through his mind, but the part of him that enjoyed the feeling was more insistent and so he kept his hand there and began to massage her breast, and he was rewarded when she didn't leave, but she did squirm, and let out a pleasured moan -
and that moan was enough to awaken everything inside him and he rolled over onto her, stripped her of her pajamas, and began to make love to her body.
She didn't protest, never protested - in fact didn't say a single word ... only moaned, only tittered, only writhed underneath him as his hands felt every curve of her body, learning them, memorizing them. As he felt her, squeezed her, rubbed her, licked her all over in ways that he had only dreamed of before, she supported him, pushing her chest out so that her wonderful breasts appeared larger and fuller, moving her fantastic ass underneath his hands, spreading her legs for him as his hands ran across her cute belly and toward her vagina ...
Was he doing any of it right? He had no way to know. He had never had sex before ... but it didn't matter, because this was what he wanted to do to her, and she was moving the way he wanted her to and baring herself to her, and she sounded and moved like a porn star even though he knew she hadn't been with anyone else, ever. (Good.)
Sex came naturally enough ... mostly because she led him to it... and because she was riding on top of him, breasts bouncing, going cowgirl style like it was second nature to her. And he was too stunned and too overcome with emotion and the raw feeling of the fact that he was having sex to make any noise ... but not Aiko, who spoke for the first time since he had touched her ... by screaming his name, screaming "More! Yes!" screaming all those things that he ever wanted a girl to scream, fulfilling him, validating him and holy shit did it feel good.
When it was over, not very long afterward, and she remained naked and slept with her body draped across his, he reflected on everything.
He'd had sex, finally, for the first time. Not just with any girl, either, but with his girl, Aiko, the woman he loved. Nothing could ever beat this, not so long as he lived.
Nothing was better than this.
---
In August, he was invited by one of his coworkers to a dinner night. "You can bring a significant other," he was told, and while not long before he would have declined he felt that he suddenly had a reason to go and a reason to engage with others. Surely his fellow programmers would appreciate the skill and effort that had gone into creating Aiko and making his love a reality?
So he went home to get Aiko. She was beautiful, dressed in a shimmering golden dress that complemented her hair and eyes, with one of the lavish necklaces he had bought her draped around her neck. Her light hair had been brushed back so that she looked every bit the angel he thought she was. If he was going to show her off to the others, he figured, why not go all out?
So they took the bus over to the stop about two blocks away from the restaurant and headed down there, hand in hand, Aiko exuding joy with every bouncy step she took. She seemed completely unfazed by the stares she was getting ... though he was not so oblivious, and blood rushed to his face every time they passed a stranger on the sidewalk who was not too discreet in looking at Aiko, looking at him, looking at the wondercouple he had made them to be. But he said nothing, electing only to continue with Aiko at his side as the city rushed by them.
The stares did not end when they arrived at the restaurant, for his coworkers no doubt did not expect to see such a beautiful, young, well-groomed lady at his side. They looked at him with slightly wide eyes and even some of their own wives and girlfriends were intrigued by Aiko.
"I didn't know you were seeing someone," said one of his coworkers as he and Aiko took their seats. "I haven't heard you talk about her before." Turning to Aiko, he extended his hand. "And you are...?"
"Aiko," she said sweetly, smiling as she sat down. "Nice to meet you."
"And you," said his coworker, nodding in response. "Call me Mike." Looking back at him, Mike said, "I'm glad you could make it. You haven't come to any of the dinners we've had since you started working with us."
He didn't want to tell them the truth - that his insecurity over having a fictional waifu combined with the mild irritation he felt every time he saw one of coworkers with their significant other made him completely averse to attending the company dinners. Plus, what could he possibly have to gain from attending the dinners when he could just as well be home cuddling with his daki of Aiko and re-watching season 3 of Diamond Destiny...?
Now, though - now that he'd brought her to life, now that she was just as beautiful as she was in the show, now that he had a significant other and could join the conversation about significant others and how life is different when you have someone to share it with... someone who isn't a fictional character. He'd had enough people looking at him strangely in college and wasn't keen to repeat some of the incidents he'd had.
"I wanted to bring my girlfriend," he responded simply. It wasn't a lie. "Aiko wanted me to go, too." (Aiko knew better than to say anything to contradict that statement.)
His coworkers shrugged and went back to talking, all but ignoring him and Aiko ...
So he just sat and listened and rubbed Aiko's knee underneath the table.
"I'm having trouble convincing Ty to take up pottery with me," said Sara, looking a little annoyed as she spoke. "He keeps saying that it's not really his kind of thing, he doesn't like to get messy, and it's too girly anyway. I don't know how I'm supposed to convince him it's not."
She went on about this for a while... all the while, he could only think that it was just as well that he liked to do all the things Aiko liked to do, and that they had a lot of shared interests. So many relationships, it seemed, were hampered by the inability of the participants to find common ground. How many times in high school and college had he seen couples that seemed to be outright bored with what the other one had taken them to do? We like the same things, he thought victoriously as he ate. That would not be an issue for us.
When Sara was finished, another coworker, Jordan, began to speak. "I've been married to Rob for a little over five years, but we were together for longer than that," he said. "Though recently, Rob has changed a bit. He's lost some of his sense of humor, and I'm worried that isn't going to go as well for me since I tell so many gay jokes!" There was a chuckling at the table, and even he couldn't help but admit it was rather amusing. He found his thoughts turning again to Aiko, though. She wouldn't change, she couldn'tchange, and so therefore they'd never have this issue. They'd never be fighting about things or disagreeing on things because she just wouldn't have any thought except the ones she had now.
So as his coworkers began to talk about the details of their imperfect relationships, he just reflected on the fact that his relationship with Aiko was perfectbecause it was designed to be perfect and it always would be.
---
One June 14, 2021, something a little different happened.
It was a Monday afternoon and it was the first sunny day they had had in a week ... in addition to being his and Aiko's first anniversary. They went for a walk in the local park, and the breeze fluttered Aiko's beautiful hair and made it shimmer in the light. He couldn't keep his eyes off her. She was absolutely beautiful.
And so was the present he had for her.
"Aiko," he said, stopping suddenly and looking at her. She looked back contentedly, a slight smile twisting the corners of her mouth.
"Aiko, w..." He swallowed. This was a lot harder than he expected it to be. How could it be? She wasn't going to leave him. She couldn't.
He gulped and tried again.
"Aiko will you marry me?" he finally choked out, holding up the box he had brought and opening it to reveal a beautiful large diamond ring.
For a second, a horrible, unfortunate second, Aiko was silent... but with shock, as it turns out, because she immediately jumped at him and flung her arms around him and whispered "Yes!"
---
Aiko didn't age, as it turned out. That had been part of what his chemistry studies had helped to teach him how to create. She was 17 forever, and she would never age and therefore her beautiful sexy form would never cease to be. She didn't really get injured, either, at least not in a way that would affect her permanently, and he was under the impression that she didn't really feel pain. So she was the perfect wife: he would never have to worry about seeing her pass before him in the hospital, afflicted with cancer or some other terminal illness, leaving him alone in the world again. That would never be an issue, and if the other waifuists followed his instructions about how to construct the Waifu-Maker, then they wouldn't have to deal with the pain of watching their beloved age again.
And so life went on. He continued his programming job. She continued to stay home and watch TV and play video games and provide him with amazing sex.
Of course, every once in a while they shook things up. Sometimes he took a few weeks off and they went on a trip somewhere. Once in a rare while he took her to a baseball game. Occasionally they saw a movie. But their interests were limited because her interests were limited. For example, his family had taken him sailing a lot as a kid, and it was something he enjoyed a bit. So he asked her, more than once, if she would ever be interested in going on a boat ...
"No thanks, I hate water," was usually her response. It made sense in canon. She'd nearly drowned in the beginning of season 2, and had been deathly afraid of water ever since, which came back to bite the whole team at the end of season 3.
It was more than just sailing. She had other interests that were never to be fulfilled. And as far as he was concerned, that was how it went, right? Sometimes your spouse doesn't like the same things you do, and you need to deal with it. Everything else was absolutely perfect, so he could handle this one thing. It was part of her personality, after all. He'd made her this way. There wasn't anything to be done, and he certainly wasn't about to dump her over that!
So life went on. They got more video games, and went on more trips, and watched more TV and movies, and had more sex, in the little unchanging box that was their home. Life rolled on around them, but they were unaffected by it, sitting in a sort of stasis provided by the Waifu-Maker that allowed his love for her to never change, because she never changed. So their domestic life was completely blissful, forever. ...
...
There was one evening. It didn't matter what evening it was, because it could as well have been any other evening. It was an evening where he and Aiko were sitting on the couch, watching some old noir movie from the 1950s, and he got up and went to go pour himself a mug of root beer.
He opened the fridge. There wasn't any root beer.
He sighed and closed the fridge. "Aiko, did you drink all the root beer again?" he called.
"Nope!" Aiko shot back in her high-pitched, giggly voice which was a sure sign she was lying to him. "You must have drunk it and forgot!"
It stirred something in his mind ...
You must have drunk it and forgot!
You must have drunk it and forgot!
You must have drunk it and forgot!
You must have drunk it and forgot!
YOU MUST HAVE DRUNK IT AND FORGOT!
and he realized with a jolt this wasn't the first time she said that. He knew that she drank all the root beer and he knew she always denied it or played bashful, but this time - this time in particular, this nameless, dateless evening - this was when he realized it was the same phrasing she had always used every time she denied drinking the root beer.
And then, another memory floated to the surface, and he realized he must have suppressed this one.
"Nope!" she giggled. "You must have drunk it and forgot!"
He sighed. "Aiko, I didn't," he explained, gesturing with his hands in an attempt to make her understand. "I always write down anything we're out of. Root beer isn't on the list, so it must have been you."
"Oh, okay!" Aiko chirped, unconcerned.
He sat down next to her at the table. "Aiko, listen," he said, and Aiko looked at him with large eyes, surely wondering what was so serious. He never really talked to her like that. "You know you drink all the root beer. Can you stop blaming me for doing it?"
"Okay," she said, nodding.
"Can you also write down root beer on the list when we're out? Look. It's on the fridge, right there. You know how to write in English. It's not hard."
"Okay, I'll do that too," she said, nodding again.
He paused. "Thanks, A," he said, leaning in and hugging her. She hugged him back, squeezing him just as tight as ever.
Except she had never done either of those things, despite promising to. And she never would, he knew that now, knew that because here she was saying maybe he drank all the root beer again when he knew perfectly well she hadn't.
And he wondered if maybe... maybe this wasn't normal... for everyone else.
---
Not long after, his coworkers had yet another company dinner. He brought Aiko along, just as he had for the past nine years since she had been created.
Mike and his wife were still there. They were older now, more worldly, and suddenly he felt self-conscious when they all eyed Aiko with suspicion. She still looked 17, after all. Mike and his wife got over it quickly, though, and started talking about their recent trip to Europe.
"Oh, it was great!" his wife said as she reached for some shrimp. "We went to Florence when we were in Italy. I told Mike, he wanted to go see the art in the Uffizi, I told him I'm really not into that sort of art stuff. He knows that, he's been trying to drag me to museums for years! But I finally gave in, I guess I figured that I might as well go to see one of the most famous museums in Italy - and I loved it! I don't know what I thought that the art would be like, but it was gorgeous! I got some great pictures, look..."
So she passed around her cell phone, and when it came to him and Aiko they looked at the pictures of the art and he had to admit they were lovely pictures.
"Aiko, look," he said softly, pointing to the picture of Botticelli's Birth of Venus. "Do you know the story? The goddess Venus apparently emerged from the ocean, fully formed... a natural beauty in every way."
"She is lovely," agreed Aiko, contemplating the picture. When he looked at Aiko's face, though, he saw no sign of recognition. No understanding of the deep historical and mythological importance of the painting and the scene depicted within. No idea of anything.
He passed the phone on quickly and stared at his plate.
Another coworker, Faith, began to speak. "Colin isn't here," she said, stating a fact they had all noticed. "He was diagnosed with cancer recently and is in the hospital at the moment."
There was a murmuring of sympathy from everyone at the table, him and Aiko included.
"It's alright," Faith continued, her face nonetheless expressing her thanks for their sympathies. "It doesn't seem like it will be fatal, which is good for all of us. But he needs to get treatment, and so he's there for a couple weeks."
"I'm sure that must be hard on you," another coworker commented. Faith shrugged.
"Somewhat," she said. "I mean, of course it's hard seeing him have to deal with this, seeing him in pain. But it kind of brings us closer because it reminds me that I love him and that he is the man I married. When he's out of the hospital we're planning to go on a cross-country trip to do all the things we've wanted to do but haven't until now. The experience has taught us that life is short and we need to take advantage of it."
It was an experience he had not had... and looking over at Aiko in perfect health and perfect shape, as new as the day she had stepped from the Waifu-Maker, he realized he never would.
But that's okay. I never have to watch her age or get sick or injured or die. That's just fine, that suits me fine.
Faith had finished her part, so the conversation moved. Jordan was at the dinner again, but this time he had brought Rob. The two had been married for the whole time since the first dinner he and Aiko had attended, and even though Jordan had expressed some discontent with Rob then, they had not split up. In fact, as Jordan would go on to say...
"Our relationship is stronger than ever," Jordan said, smiling warmly, and Rob smiled as well. "We were having some issues in the past because Rob wasn't so fond of my humor. But we talked it out some... and I realized that there are better ways to connect to your significant other than making jokes all the time. So I agreed to cut out the gay jokes. Instead, we've been bonding over things like TV, music, and our favorite books... and reality TV shows, which is something neither of us thought we'd like, but they're a decent replacement for my jokes!"
The group chuckled again. He did not join them.
"It just goes to show," said someone else at the table (he didn't really care who), "sometimes working things out when your partner changes can lead to new experiences that make you bond even more."
"Yup," Rob said, speaking up for the first time. "I think we're both happier this way, and we're even closer than before for it."
Aiko won't change. She can't change.
The night went on from there, but he had lost all interest in both the food and his coworkers' conversation.
---
When they got home, he sat with Aiko on the couch and they watched another episode of Diamond Destiny. It was their sixteenth re-watching of the show. Or maybe it was their seventeenth. He didn't remember. It didn't matter. (The show was short, only having had 3 seasons before being canceled in 2015.)
In the middle of it, something was on his mind. "Aiko, would you want to go sailing?" he asked.
"No thanks," she said. "I hate water."
So it went. But he didn't want to hear that again - not that exact phrasing, anyway, it made him sick.
"Are you sure?" he pressed. "It's fun. You don't get wet, usually. You get to feel the wind in your face and your hair. It's not fast enough to make waves or make you seasick."
"I still think I'll pass," she said, smiling. "I hate water."
I hate water.
Struck with a sudden bout of anger, he turned and left for their bedroom, slamming the door and leaving a presumably confused Aiko out in the living room.
---
So the days continued to pass, but this time there was not the same feeling of utter and complete bliss that there had been for nearly nine years. Now... there was doubt. Niggling doubt that permeated his thoughts and every action he took. No longer was he working to keep her happy at work; suddenly work was uninteresting and bland. No longer did he think it was cute when she drank all the root beer; suddenly it angered him. No longer was he content to sit and watch TV and play video games with her. He wanted more out of life, and this 17-year-old baseball girl wasn't providing him with the uncertainty that he needed in his life, in his relationship. The uncertainty that humans needed.
Of course ... he denied every bit of that. She was his waifu. She was the one he had studied chemistry and programming to bring to life, and now he was doubting that? How could he? How could anyone?
... except for the guy with Melia as his waifu, he remembered, the one who had doubted from the very beginning. He was right... but he would never admit it. No. He couldn't. He'd spent too goddamn long with Aiko as a waifu and a real wife to go back now and say that it wasn't worth it.
So he told himself for two weeks, until finally one night, when Aiko was snoring softly beside him, that he finally let the thought he'd been holding back come to the forefront of his mind.
He'd wasted nine years of his life.
This realization awakened a bizarre cocktail of emotions in him. Anger, sadness, regret, despair... and above all a desire to prove - prove something - prove it wasn't worthless and that something had been even the slightest bit worthwhile -
He reached over and grabbed Aiko's breasts as she slept.
She did not sleep for long afterward, of course, as her bright eyes opened and she looked at him. She was groggy at first, but as he shoved his hands up underneath her pajama shirt and felt her body beneath, she closed her eyes and made some sort of noise ... which he assumed was satisfaction.
He pulled her pants down around her ankles, spread her legs, and thrust himself into her.
She didn't feel pain but she sure as hell felt pleasure, he knew, and her writhing as he continued to fuck her proved it. Every noise she made drove him madder and he went deeper and deeper inside her, his hands squeezing her breasts as he went. He ignored her as she screamed. Was it screams of pleasure or anger? he wasn't sure, it didn't matter, there had to be something worthwhile in the sex they had. She had to have done it voluntarily, she had to have or else he'd never - he'd never deserved to have sex in the first place, he'd created her, he had made her love him...
Her screams pierced the night
but he did not care.
...
When he rolled off her, she turned away from him. Was she crying? Maybe. He didn't know. He had never seen her cry and wasn't sure she had the capacity for it. He didn't care. He felt sick because he didn't care, but he didn't care, and he wouldn't care, because her actions here proved it wasn't worthwhile, because they were definitely pleasure screams and he had programmed her to love having sex with him so that was a given.
He hadn't charmed her into sex, or marriage, or a domestic life, and he failed to charm her into engaging in his interests. She didn't change, but hehad, but she didn't, and so of course she was going to act the same way she had the day she stepped out of the Waifu-Maker, which is to say - a caricature of her canon self and a horrible imitation of human women.
She might be three-dimensional in terms of physical existence, but she was missing something else - the dimension of depth that real humans existed. Even a 3D girl isn't enough. She has to have the other dimension.
And Aiko didn't.
She was fake.
He'd wasted nine years of his life.
---
The next morning he deleted his Reddit account. He had no choice, after - after -
it was right there the thing he needed to use all he had to do was grab it and pick it up and like a robot suddenly it was in his hands and
He destroyed the plans for the Waifu-Maker and took them off Dropbox. There was no choice left to him. If everyone made the thing, if everyone made their waifu reality, if everyone realized the same things he had, there would be the same
and he took it and he turned her over so she was face up (was she crying who knows?) she was face up and he placed it
the same result every time, and if everyone did this everyone would go crazy and
placed it on her face and she immediately jolted and screamed and writhed
and do what he had. and nobody else should have to deal with that
writhed and screamed and writhed and it was all he could do to hold it down on her
because now he had to deal with the aftermath. she wasnt real, she never had been, so it didnt matter, didnt fucking matter that
and her spasms grew slower and weaker until finally
didnt fucking matter that she was
finally she was still and he removed the pillow
dead.
---
what was left for him now?
hed wasted nine years of his life with a fake girl who barely had any mind of her own, she was perfect but she was not the perfect wife and he should have known that, should have seen it coming, the one guy on reddit even warned him but he didnt believe it and where was he now??? she was dead and he was - he couldnt face the world like this. a real girl would be infinitely better he knew but he had murdered his wifeand
no but she's fake, he said, she's fake and she never mattered so what does it matter that she's dead? i didn't murder her i just, i just
but no as much as he tried to rationalize it he had murdered her and he would be convinced he didn't but he had.
so what was left for him now?
the police sirens flared outside how could they know???? how could they know what i did nothings happened she didnt make noise no one else could hear me HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN?
somewhere deep in the dresser was something he had bought to keep aiko safe but that time was long gone, long gone since he had killed her
*BANG*
---
It was two weeks before they were discovered, the murder-suicide couple. The police hadn't known.
They had never been there in the first place.
He had deleted the Waifu-Maker plans, but in his madness had forgotten that he himself had saved them on a flash drive. When the detectives found the flash drive, it wasn't hard to piece two-and-two together when Aiko turned out to be a dead end.
And so the story made the news and everyone heard about it. The man who had been the modern Dr. Frankenstein and created for himself the perfect wife... or rather, some cynical commenters noted when the news about Aiko's genital injuries came out, the perfect sex slave.
But people failed to realize the true meaning of his madness and the final days of him and Aiko. Some theorized that Aiko had fought back against his raping her and he had murdered her because she was growing a mind of her own when he had created her to be subservient. Some thought this ... and then more thought it ... and soon everyone thought it.
No one except a few people who had known him on /r/waifuism would ever realize that the truth was, in fact, the complete opposite.
No one.
The question had been posed before... but it was thistime that he started to really think about it. Mostly because of one comment, one naysayer present among the many people whose responses amounted to "Yes, without question!"
"No. Alot of the reason that I love Melia has to do with the way she responds to her situation in the game, and if she were in real life she wouldnt have that. Plus she might be different irl than she is in the game since its a different universe and that might be bad too."
It was an alien concept to him... what person that regularly posted on /r/waifuism wouldn't want their waifu to be reality? There were all those images that people made with their waifu pressing sadly against a glass screen, pining over the lost love they would never get to experience due to their existence as a fictional character (he hated to use those words but this was one of the times he had to be frank about it). The dakis weren't enough. Nobody ever really admitted it, but it was obvious. There were the domestic memes, where you'd talk about how you and your waifu get along on a day-to-day basis. Then there was the guy who had actually gone and married Ruby Rose ...
Why wouldn't anyone want all of that to actually be real?
And that's why he went back to school for chemistry while simultaneously giving himself a refresher on how to program an intelligent computer ...
---
A few years later his computer was complete. The Waifu-Maker, he called it, although he knew it should have a better name than that because it was morethan that. It was a Saturday morning in June when he sat down to test it, since he was off work that day. Before doing so, he logged into /r/waifuism briefly...
"I've finally finished the computer I've been talking about. The one that makes waifus real. I'm going to start with my waifu Aiko and if that works I can send anyone interested the computer plans, but you'll have to build it yourself. Wish me luck!"
Though he wouldn't see them for a month, the fellow waifuists responded to the thread with words of support... except for one familiar poster who would say, "Be careful man. This might not turn out to be the starlight and rainbows you expect it to be."
Even if he had seen it, he wasn't going to listen. How could he? He'd gone back to school for this and devoted years of his life to it. What would he be now if he decided not to go through with it when it was right in front of him and all he had to do was hook up his laptop to it and plug in a few URLs and some code he'd written...?
So he grabbed a biscuit while the computer whirred in front of him and the large glass-walled pod attached to it filled with smoke ...
---
In a few hours, the computer dinged like an oven. Wisps of smoke were still rising from the pod, but it dissipated quickly in the many fans he had set up around the contraption. Now that it was over, though, the smoke began to clear, and the glass of the pod started to be transparent once again, revealing ...
A human girl about five-foot-five with long silvery-blonde hair, sky-blue eyes, and the most beautiful smile he had ever seen stepped out from behind the glass and into his spare room.
She was naked, and that was the first thing he noticed as she moved. He felt a tightening in his pants, and cursed himself for not covering up the pod and having clothes available for her. This was his waifu and the minute she stepped into the 3D world he was already looking at her in a sexual manner. This was no way to treat a lady!
She looked at him, though, looked at him with her blue eyes, with the innocence that had defined her in her show, and suddenly it didn't matter anymore, none of it did. She was here, she was here with him, and now he could talk to her and laugh with her and eat with her and cuddle with her and touch her and do all of the things he had ever wanted to do with a girl and more besides. And it wasn't someone else, it wasn't a 3D replacement for his beloved Aiko, it was Aiko, it was a girl with Aiko's hair and Aiko's eyes and Aiko's breasts and all of Aiko's personality. It was truly his waifu made flesh. And he would love her forever.
---
Aiko was from an anime called Diamond Destiny,about a group of high school girls who decided to form a baseball team in order to prove that girls could play baseball just as well as guys could. There was a manga, too, but he had never read it. The lack of color and movement kind of put him off, and he had tried to read the first volume once but gotten bored with it rather quickly. The clear, crisp animation style was much more appealing to him.
Aiko played third base. She was a very good defensive player, though that came at the cost of her offensive skills being rather weak. Almost every episode had a gag where she would go to bat, swing at the ball, and miss in increasingly absurd ways... though every once in a while she did manage to hit a single. She was ditzy, Aiko was, and sometimes didn't realize she had made a mistake until much later... such as that time in season 2 when she was in charge of giving the bus driver directions to a game and they ended up in a forest in the complete opposite direction, leading to a short arc where the team had to make use of their baseball skills to survive the jungle when the bus broke down.
To him, the ditzy aspect was adorable. It meant he could smile and chuckle every time she did something like that, or accidentally drink all the root beer, or forget to bring the team's bats to a playoff game, or get distracted by the beautiful batter from the private school and fail to catch the ball he hit right toward her...
But beyond that, she was a very loyal teammate who always did her best for the team even as they were frustrated with her at times, and he liked that. It showed good character, he thought, and he loved for it. That was why she was here.
His salary was enough to support the both of them, so her working was a non-issue. Besides, she was 17 in canon, and so she couldn't do a lot in the world yet... especially because he had no records for her that could prove she was supposed to be 17 when the time she was "born" was on June 14th, 2020, at 11:43 AM. So she stayed at home and watched TV (she liked sports a lot, of course) and played video games and generally hung out while he went to the office.
In the first few weeks, her actions proved that his computer creation had been successful. She drank all the root beer and she failed to comprehend moving objects and she broke his lamp once and she burned herself with hot water
but she would collapse into his arms at the end of the day, murmuring softly as he ran his fingers through her beautiful shimmering hair, the hair of an angel, and he couldn't help but love her, love everything about her, love that she drank all the root beer and couldn't comprehend moving objects and broke his lamp once and burned herself with hot water because it was Aiko that did all those things and Aiko was his love, his one, his only, his waifu come to life, and for that reason alone he could never not love her.
---
A month after the experiment had been successful, he finally returned to /r/waifuism to post about it. Turns out a couple users had been worried when he never reported back after announcing he was starting the experiment... it would be fine now, though.
"Experiment was a success. Aiko is now living with me and she's just like she is in Diamond Destiny. She looks just the same too! I love her so much."
And then he linked to the Dropbox folder with the plans and code for the computer he had built. Everyone else deserved to have a waifu too, after all.
He had the day off work, so he stuck around on the subreddit a while, answering questions about Aiko and their life together. At one point he took a photograph of Aiko sipping from a can of root beer on their couch and uploaded it, and the other waifuists agreed with his opinion that she had turned out really well. They liked the look of her and now they were more convinced to build their own computers and make their waifus reality too.
Of course ... there was still the one single doubter, and he suspected that as long as Aiko was alive that this doubter would continue to doubt.
"But shes not a real woman shes just your waifu. I mean theres a difference between someone whose spent alot of time in the world and someone whose personality is taken from a different world. I love Melia but it wouldnt work in the real world because shes from the Bionis and not Earth. I dont see how it would be different for someone else."
The poster was wrong ... wasn't he? He had to be. Aiko was here with him now, and yes, she wasn't at her high school and she wasn't playing baseball and she wasn't with Sakura and Mei and her other friends but that didn't matter, did it, because she still had Aiko's personality and she didn't - see, the important thing was she didn't miss them, he'd programmed it that way, she was here to love him and exist in his world and not in a high school in Japan.
That was all he needed and that was all he ever would need.
---
They had sex for the first time that night after the return to Reddit.
It sounded stupid, he knew, when he thought about it. She'd been with him for a month and he hadn't - hadn't done - anything with her yet, why not? He loved her, right?, and sometimes in the months and years before the computer was finished he'd take the daki he had of her, the one he'd commissioned, with her half undressed in her baseball uniform with the top of her shirt pulled down and unbuttoned such that it uncovered one of her perfect breasts and the bottom of shirt pulled up so that he could see her belly button and her striped pants pulled down just enough that he could see her bright red panties, and he'd take that daki and he'd cuddle close to it and touch it and imagine that he was touching her, skin to skin, making love.
But she was real, and it was different here ... he had never had sex before, had never touched or kissed a girl or gotten one naked - Aiko had come out naked but that was different! She would move and she would make noise and it was a little uncomfortable to him that he was now dealing with the concept of a real girlto be the recipient of his sexual desire. What if Aiko didn't like the way he touched her? What if she left him? (He didn't think his programming had left any possibility of that, but he couldn't be sure.) Or what if he couldn't get it up for her? Or - or -
all of these thoughts were running through his head as she came to bed that night after showering. Her beautiful hair shimmered in the low light of the bedroom as she crawled into bed beside him and lay next to him and he began obediently brought his arm underneath her to hold her and began to stroke her hair, listening to her murmurs...
Some people on the thread had asked. "Have you had sex yet?" "Is it good?" and he had to admit that they hadn't. Which was the stupid part, the weird part. He'd brought her to life, so why couldn't he make love to her just like he'd always dreamed of...? She'd been here for a month, didn't people usually at least kissbefore then? Real kisses. Like, lips to lips. Not ... lips to her hair or her sleeping body in the morning.
Tonight was different. Tonight he wanted to do it, and he knew she would never initiate it, not until after the first time, because that was in her personality and her programming. If anything was going to happen it was going to be him, and it was going to be him. Tonight. Now.
And so he took his other arm and reached over to squeeze her breast.
She gasped, and he nearly panicked and jolted away from her, a million terrible thoughts running through his mind, but the part of him that enjoyed the feeling was more insistent and so he kept his hand there and began to massage her breast, and he was rewarded when she didn't leave, but she did squirm, and let out a pleasured moan -
and that moan was enough to awaken everything inside him and he rolled over onto her, stripped her of her pajamas, and began to make love to her body.
She didn't protest, never protested - in fact didn't say a single word ... only moaned, only tittered, only writhed underneath him as his hands felt every curve of her body, learning them, memorizing them. As he felt her, squeezed her, rubbed her, licked her all over in ways that he had only dreamed of before, she supported him, pushing her chest out so that her wonderful breasts appeared larger and fuller, moving her fantastic ass underneath his hands, spreading her legs for him as his hands ran across her cute belly and toward her vagina ...
Was he doing any of it right? He had no way to know. He had never had sex before ... but it didn't matter, because this was what he wanted to do to her, and she was moving the way he wanted her to and baring herself to her, and she sounded and moved like a porn star even though he knew she hadn't been with anyone else, ever. (Good.)
Sex came naturally enough ... mostly because she led him to it... and because she was riding on top of him, breasts bouncing, going cowgirl style like it was second nature to her. And he was too stunned and too overcome with emotion and the raw feeling of the fact that he was having sex to make any noise ... but not Aiko, who spoke for the first time since he had touched her ... by screaming his name, screaming "More! Yes!" screaming all those things that he ever wanted a girl to scream, fulfilling him, validating him and holy shit did it feel good.
When it was over, not very long afterward, and she remained naked and slept with her body draped across his, he reflected on everything.
He'd had sex, finally, for the first time. Not just with any girl, either, but with his girl, Aiko, the woman he loved. Nothing could ever beat this, not so long as he lived.
Nothing was better than this.
---
In August, he was invited by one of his coworkers to a dinner night. "You can bring a significant other," he was told, and while not long before he would have declined he felt that he suddenly had a reason to go and a reason to engage with others. Surely his fellow programmers would appreciate the skill and effort that had gone into creating Aiko and making his love a reality?
So he went home to get Aiko. She was beautiful, dressed in a shimmering golden dress that complemented her hair and eyes, with one of the lavish necklaces he had bought her draped around her neck. Her light hair had been brushed back so that she looked every bit the angel he thought she was. If he was going to show her off to the others, he figured, why not go all out?
So they took the bus over to the stop about two blocks away from the restaurant and headed down there, hand in hand, Aiko exuding joy with every bouncy step she took. She seemed completely unfazed by the stares she was getting ... though he was not so oblivious, and blood rushed to his face every time they passed a stranger on the sidewalk who was not too discreet in looking at Aiko, looking at him, looking at the wondercouple he had made them to be. But he said nothing, electing only to continue with Aiko at his side as the city rushed by them.
The stares did not end when they arrived at the restaurant, for his coworkers no doubt did not expect to see such a beautiful, young, well-groomed lady at his side. They looked at him with slightly wide eyes and even some of their own wives and girlfriends were intrigued by Aiko.
"I didn't know you were seeing someone," said one of his coworkers as he and Aiko took their seats. "I haven't heard you talk about her before." Turning to Aiko, he extended his hand. "And you are...?"
"Aiko," she said sweetly, smiling as she sat down. "Nice to meet you."
"And you," said his coworker, nodding in response. "Call me Mike." Looking back at him, Mike said, "I'm glad you could make it. You haven't come to any of the dinners we've had since you started working with us."
He didn't want to tell them the truth - that his insecurity over having a fictional waifu combined with the mild irritation he felt every time he saw one of coworkers with their significant other made him completely averse to attending the company dinners. Plus, what could he possibly have to gain from attending the dinners when he could just as well be home cuddling with his daki of Aiko and re-watching season 3 of Diamond Destiny...?
Now, though - now that he'd brought her to life, now that she was just as beautiful as she was in the show, now that he had a significant other and could join the conversation about significant others and how life is different when you have someone to share it with... someone who isn't a fictional character. He'd had enough people looking at him strangely in college and wasn't keen to repeat some of the incidents he'd had.
"I wanted to bring my girlfriend," he responded simply. It wasn't a lie. "Aiko wanted me to go, too." (Aiko knew better than to say anything to contradict that statement.)
His coworkers shrugged and went back to talking, all but ignoring him and Aiko ...
So he just sat and listened and rubbed Aiko's knee underneath the table.
"I'm having trouble convincing Ty to take up pottery with me," said Sara, looking a little annoyed as she spoke. "He keeps saying that it's not really his kind of thing, he doesn't like to get messy, and it's too girly anyway. I don't know how I'm supposed to convince him it's not."
She went on about this for a while... all the while, he could only think that it was just as well that he liked to do all the things Aiko liked to do, and that they had a lot of shared interests. So many relationships, it seemed, were hampered by the inability of the participants to find common ground. How many times in high school and college had he seen couples that seemed to be outright bored with what the other one had taken them to do? We like the same things, he thought victoriously as he ate. That would not be an issue for us.
When Sara was finished, another coworker, Jordan, began to speak. "I've been married to Rob for a little over five years, but we were together for longer than that," he said. "Though recently, Rob has changed a bit. He's lost some of his sense of humor, and I'm worried that isn't going to go as well for me since I tell so many gay jokes!" There was a chuckling at the table, and even he couldn't help but admit it was rather amusing. He found his thoughts turning again to Aiko, though. She wouldn't change, she couldn'tchange, and so therefore they'd never have this issue. They'd never be fighting about things or disagreeing on things because she just wouldn't have any thought except the ones she had now.
So as his coworkers began to talk about the details of their imperfect relationships, he just reflected on the fact that his relationship with Aiko was perfectbecause it was designed to be perfect and it always would be.
---
One June 14, 2021, something a little different happened.
It was a Monday afternoon and it was the first sunny day they had had in a week ... in addition to being his and Aiko's first anniversary. They went for a walk in the local park, and the breeze fluttered Aiko's beautiful hair and made it shimmer in the light. He couldn't keep his eyes off her. She was absolutely beautiful.
And so was the present he had for her.
"Aiko," he said, stopping suddenly and looking at her. She looked back contentedly, a slight smile twisting the corners of her mouth.
"Aiko, w..." He swallowed. This was a lot harder than he expected it to be. How could it be? She wasn't going to leave him. She couldn't.
He gulped and tried again.
"Aiko will you marry me?" he finally choked out, holding up the box he had brought and opening it to reveal a beautiful large diamond ring.
For a second, a horrible, unfortunate second, Aiko was silent... but with shock, as it turns out, because she immediately jumped at him and flung her arms around him and whispered "Yes!"
---
Aiko didn't age, as it turned out. That had been part of what his chemistry studies had helped to teach him how to create. She was 17 forever, and she would never age and therefore her beautiful sexy form would never cease to be. She didn't really get injured, either, at least not in a way that would affect her permanently, and he was under the impression that she didn't really feel pain. So she was the perfect wife: he would never have to worry about seeing her pass before him in the hospital, afflicted with cancer or some other terminal illness, leaving him alone in the world again. That would never be an issue, and if the other waifuists followed his instructions about how to construct the Waifu-Maker, then they wouldn't have to deal with the pain of watching their beloved age again.
And so life went on. He continued his programming job. She continued to stay home and watch TV and play video games and provide him with amazing sex.
Of course, every once in a while they shook things up. Sometimes he took a few weeks off and they went on a trip somewhere. Once in a rare while he took her to a baseball game. Occasionally they saw a movie. But their interests were limited because her interests were limited. For example, his family had taken him sailing a lot as a kid, and it was something he enjoyed a bit. So he asked her, more than once, if she would ever be interested in going on a boat ...
"No thanks, I hate water," was usually her response. It made sense in canon. She'd nearly drowned in the beginning of season 2, and had been deathly afraid of water ever since, which came back to bite the whole team at the end of season 3.
It was more than just sailing. She had other interests that were never to be fulfilled. And as far as he was concerned, that was how it went, right? Sometimes your spouse doesn't like the same things you do, and you need to deal with it. Everything else was absolutely perfect, so he could handle this one thing. It was part of her personality, after all. He'd made her this way. There wasn't anything to be done, and he certainly wasn't about to dump her over that!
So life went on. They got more video games, and went on more trips, and watched more TV and movies, and had more sex, in the little unchanging box that was their home. Life rolled on around them, but they were unaffected by it, sitting in a sort of stasis provided by the Waifu-Maker that allowed his love for her to never change, because she never changed. So their domestic life was completely blissful, forever. ...
...
There was one evening. It didn't matter what evening it was, because it could as well have been any other evening. It was an evening where he and Aiko were sitting on the couch, watching some old noir movie from the 1950s, and he got up and went to go pour himself a mug of root beer.
He opened the fridge. There wasn't any root beer.
He sighed and closed the fridge. "Aiko, did you drink all the root beer again?" he called.
"Nope!" Aiko shot back in her high-pitched, giggly voice which was a sure sign she was lying to him. "You must have drunk it and forgot!"
It stirred something in his mind ...
You must have drunk it and forgot!
You must have drunk it and forgot!
You must have drunk it and forgot!
You must have drunk it and forgot!
YOU MUST HAVE DRUNK IT AND FORGOT!
and he realized with a jolt this wasn't the first time she said that. He knew that she drank all the root beer and he knew she always denied it or played bashful, but this time - this time in particular, this nameless, dateless evening - this was when he realized it was the same phrasing she had always used every time she denied drinking the root beer.
And then, another memory floated to the surface, and he realized he must have suppressed this one.
"Nope!" she giggled. "You must have drunk it and forgot!"
He sighed. "Aiko, I didn't," he explained, gesturing with his hands in an attempt to make her understand. "I always write down anything we're out of. Root beer isn't on the list, so it must have been you."
"Oh, okay!" Aiko chirped, unconcerned.
He sat down next to her at the table. "Aiko, listen," he said, and Aiko looked at him with large eyes, surely wondering what was so serious. He never really talked to her like that. "You know you drink all the root beer. Can you stop blaming me for doing it?"
"Okay," she said, nodding.
"Can you also write down root beer on the list when we're out? Look. It's on the fridge, right there. You know how to write in English. It's not hard."
"Okay, I'll do that too," she said, nodding again.
He paused. "Thanks, A," he said, leaning in and hugging her. She hugged him back, squeezing him just as tight as ever.
Except she had never done either of those things, despite promising to. And she never would, he knew that now, knew that because here she was saying maybe he drank all the root beer again when he knew perfectly well she hadn't.
And he wondered if maybe... maybe this wasn't normal... for everyone else.
---
Not long after, his coworkers had yet another company dinner. He brought Aiko along, just as he had for the past nine years since she had been created.
Mike and his wife were still there. They were older now, more worldly, and suddenly he felt self-conscious when they all eyed Aiko with suspicion. She still looked 17, after all. Mike and his wife got over it quickly, though, and started talking about their recent trip to Europe.
"Oh, it was great!" his wife said as she reached for some shrimp. "We went to Florence when we were in Italy. I told Mike, he wanted to go see the art in the Uffizi, I told him I'm really not into that sort of art stuff. He knows that, he's been trying to drag me to museums for years! But I finally gave in, I guess I figured that I might as well go to see one of the most famous museums in Italy - and I loved it! I don't know what I thought that the art would be like, but it was gorgeous! I got some great pictures, look..."
So she passed around her cell phone, and when it came to him and Aiko they looked at the pictures of the art and he had to admit they were lovely pictures.
"Aiko, look," he said softly, pointing to the picture of Botticelli's Birth of Venus. "Do you know the story? The goddess Venus apparently emerged from the ocean, fully formed... a natural beauty in every way."
"She is lovely," agreed Aiko, contemplating the picture. When he looked at Aiko's face, though, he saw no sign of recognition. No understanding of the deep historical and mythological importance of the painting and the scene depicted within. No idea of anything.
He passed the phone on quickly and stared at his plate.
Another coworker, Faith, began to speak. "Colin isn't here," she said, stating a fact they had all noticed. "He was diagnosed with cancer recently and is in the hospital at the moment."
There was a murmuring of sympathy from everyone at the table, him and Aiko included.
"It's alright," Faith continued, her face nonetheless expressing her thanks for their sympathies. "It doesn't seem like it will be fatal, which is good for all of us. But he needs to get treatment, and so he's there for a couple weeks."
"I'm sure that must be hard on you," another coworker commented. Faith shrugged.
"Somewhat," she said. "I mean, of course it's hard seeing him have to deal with this, seeing him in pain. But it kind of brings us closer because it reminds me that I love him and that he is the man I married. When he's out of the hospital we're planning to go on a cross-country trip to do all the things we've wanted to do but haven't until now. The experience has taught us that life is short and we need to take advantage of it."
It was an experience he had not had... and looking over at Aiko in perfect health and perfect shape, as new as the day she had stepped from the Waifu-Maker, he realized he never would.
But that's okay. I never have to watch her age or get sick or injured or die. That's just fine, that suits me fine.
Faith had finished her part, so the conversation moved. Jordan was at the dinner again, but this time he had brought Rob. The two had been married for the whole time since the first dinner he and Aiko had attended, and even though Jordan had expressed some discontent with Rob then, they had not split up. In fact, as Jordan would go on to say...
"Our relationship is stronger than ever," Jordan said, smiling warmly, and Rob smiled as well. "We were having some issues in the past because Rob wasn't so fond of my humor. But we talked it out some... and I realized that there are better ways to connect to your significant other than making jokes all the time. So I agreed to cut out the gay jokes. Instead, we've been bonding over things like TV, music, and our favorite books... and reality TV shows, which is something neither of us thought we'd like, but they're a decent replacement for my jokes!"
The group chuckled again. He did not join them.
"It just goes to show," said someone else at the table (he didn't really care who), "sometimes working things out when your partner changes can lead to new experiences that make you bond even more."
"Yup," Rob said, speaking up for the first time. "I think we're both happier this way, and we're even closer than before for it."
Aiko won't change. She can't change.
The night went on from there, but he had lost all interest in both the food and his coworkers' conversation.
---
When they got home, he sat with Aiko on the couch and they watched another episode of Diamond Destiny. It was their sixteenth re-watching of the show. Or maybe it was their seventeenth. He didn't remember. It didn't matter. (The show was short, only having had 3 seasons before being canceled in 2015.)
In the middle of it, something was on his mind. "Aiko, would you want to go sailing?" he asked.
"No thanks," she said. "I hate water."
So it went. But he didn't want to hear that again - not that exact phrasing, anyway, it made him sick.
"Are you sure?" he pressed. "It's fun. You don't get wet, usually. You get to feel the wind in your face and your hair. It's not fast enough to make waves or make you seasick."
"I still think I'll pass," she said, smiling. "I hate water."
I hate water.
Struck with a sudden bout of anger, he turned and left for their bedroom, slamming the door and leaving a presumably confused Aiko out in the living room.
---
So the days continued to pass, but this time there was not the same feeling of utter and complete bliss that there had been for nearly nine years. Now... there was doubt. Niggling doubt that permeated his thoughts and every action he took. No longer was he working to keep her happy at work; suddenly work was uninteresting and bland. No longer did he think it was cute when she drank all the root beer; suddenly it angered him. No longer was he content to sit and watch TV and play video games with her. He wanted more out of life, and this 17-year-old baseball girl wasn't providing him with the uncertainty that he needed in his life, in his relationship. The uncertainty that humans needed.
Of course ... he denied every bit of that. She was his waifu. She was the one he had studied chemistry and programming to bring to life, and now he was doubting that? How could he? How could anyone?
... except for the guy with Melia as his waifu, he remembered, the one who had doubted from the very beginning. He was right... but he would never admit it. No. He couldn't. He'd spent too goddamn long with Aiko as a waifu and a real wife to go back now and say that it wasn't worth it.
So he told himself for two weeks, until finally one night, when Aiko was snoring softly beside him, that he finally let the thought he'd been holding back come to the forefront of his mind.
He'd wasted nine years of his life.
This realization awakened a bizarre cocktail of emotions in him. Anger, sadness, regret, despair... and above all a desire to prove - prove something - prove it wasn't worthless and that something had been even the slightest bit worthwhile -
He reached over and grabbed Aiko's breasts as she slept.
She did not sleep for long afterward, of course, as her bright eyes opened and she looked at him. She was groggy at first, but as he shoved his hands up underneath her pajama shirt and felt her body beneath, she closed her eyes and made some sort of noise ... which he assumed was satisfaction.
He pulled her pants down around her ankles, spread her legs, and thrust himself into her.
She didn't feel pain but she sure as hell felt pleasure, he knew, and her writhing as he continued to fuck her proved it. Every noise she made drove him madder and he went deeper and deeper inside her, his hands squeezing her breasts as he went. He ignored her as she screamed. Was it screams of pleasure or anger? he wasn't sure, it didn't matter, there had to be something worthwhile in the sex they had. She had to have done it voluntarily, she had to have or else he'd never - he'd never deserved to have sex in the first place, he'd created her, he had made her love him...
Her screams pierced the night
but he did not care.
...
When he rolled off her, she turned away from him. Was she crying? Maybe. He didn't know. He had never seen her cry and wasn't sure she had the capacity for it. He didn't care. He felt sick because he didn't care, but he didn't care, and he wouldn't care, because her actions here proved it wasn't worthwhile, because they were definitely pleasure screams and he had programmed her to love having sex with him so that was a given.
He hadn't charmed her into sex, or marriage, or a domestic life, and he failed to charm her into engaging in his interests. She didn't change, but hehad, but she didn't, and so of course she was going to act the same way she had the day she stepped out of the Waifu-Maker, which is to say - a caricature of her canon self and a horrible imitation of human women.
She might be three-dimensional in terms of physical existence, but she was missing something else - the dimension of depth that real humans existed. Even a 3D girl isn't enough. She has to have the other dimension.
And Aiko didn't.
She was fake.
He'd wasted nine years of his life.
---
The next morning he deleted his Reddit account. He had no choice, after - after -
it was right there the thing he needed to use all he had to do was grab it and pick it up and like a robot suddenly it was in his hands and
He destroyed the plans for the Waifu-Maker and took them off Dropbox. There was no choice left to him. If everyone made the thing, if everyone made their waifu reality, if everyone realized the same things he had, there would be the same
and he took it and he turned her over so she was face up (was she crying who knows?) she was face up and he placed it
the same result every time, and if everyone did this everyone would go crazy and
placed it on her face and she immediately jolted and screamed and writhed
and do what he had. and nobody else should have to deal with that
writhed and screamed and writhed and it was all he could do to hold it down on her
because now he had to deal with the aftermath. she wasnt real, she never had been, so it didnt matter, didnt fucking matter that
and her spasms grew slower and weaker until finally
didnt fucking matter that she was
finally she was still and he removed the pillow
dead.
---
what was left for him now?
hed wasted nine years of his life with a fake girl who barely had any mind of her own, she was perfect but she was not the perfect wife and he should have known that, should have seen it coming, the one guy on reddit even warned him but he didnt believe it and where was he now??? she was dead and he was - he couldnt face the world like this. a real girl would be infinitely better he knew but he had murdered his wifeand
no but she's fake, he said, she's fake and she never mattered so what does it matter that she's dead? i didn't murder her i just, i just
but no as much as he tried to rationalize it he had murdered her and he would be convinced he didn't but he had.
so what was left for him now?
the police sirens flared outside how could they know???? how could they know what i did nothings happened she didnt make noise no one else could hear me HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN?
somewhere deep in the dresser was something he had bought to keep aiko safe but that time was long gone, long gone since he had killed her
*BANG*
---
It was two weeks before they were discovered, the murder-suicide couple. The police hadn't known.
They had never been there in the first place.
He had deleted the Waifu-Maker plans, but in his madness had forgotten that he himself had saved them on a flash drive. When the detectives found the flash drive, it wasn't hard to piece two-and-two together when Aiko turned out to be a dead end.
And so the story made the news and everyone heard about it. The man who had been the modern Dr. Frankenstein and created for himself the perfect wife... or rather, some cynical commenters noted when the news about Aiko's genital injuries came out, the perfect sex slave.
But people failed to realize the true meaning of his madness and the final days of him and Aiko. Some theorized that Aiko had fought back against his raping her and he had murdered her because she was growing a mind of her own when he had created her to be subservient. Some thought this ... and then more thought it ... and soon everyone thought it.
No one except a few people who had known him on /r/waifuism would ever realize that the truth was, in fact, the complete opposite.
No one.
After the publicized murder-suicide of an unknown programmer and his wife Aiko - later found to be not a human but the flesh embodiment of a Japanese anime character - it sparked a great controversy about the nature of fictional characters and the morality of bringing them to life like the programmer had.
His Waifu-Maker had proved it was not an impossible task. The fact that some Redditors had built their own based on the plans (they were on Reddit for nine years before he deleted them, after all) and brought their own waifus to life proved it was a replicable occurrence. Somehow, against all odds, an obsessed programmer and his love for a fictional character had created a machine that could bring fictional characters to life, provided there was sufficient information about them.
The plans were deleted and the proper authorities made a point to ensure that no one (else) could get their hands on them before breaking the news to the world at large. So, then, everyone learned the story of the programmer and Aiko, and everyone know that somehow, somewhere, it was possible to bring a character to life, even if the means had been intentionally destroyed.
So it sparked a debate. The plans still existed; they were being secretly held by the US government in the event that creating fictional characters could somehow be used to their advantage - creating superheroes to give the USA a further advantage in wartime, for instance, or using fictional characters as a source of free labor, since the plans the programmer had built created a character that didn't age, didn't suffer pain, and maybe even didn't need sustenance. Would that have been a sick and twisted use of the plans? Who knows? That's why there was a debate: wherein did the morality of creating fictional characters into a completely different reality lie?
It wouldn't have just been fictional characters that you could create, people quickly realized. The program generated its creations' personality based on the information about the character that was fed to it: episodes of the show in question, descriptions of the character's personality, really anything that could be used to show what the character was like. So, then, would it not be possible to create a human not part of a fictional canon by writing or creating media depicting them consistently and feeding that to the machine? Couldn't one theoretically create the perfect soldier, the perfect worker, the perfect lover, the perfect politician... all by designing a character with those traits and feeding it to the machine?
Well... so people thought. And maybe for some of that, it would have been plausible. But the biggest thing that people failed to realize - that people had no way of knowing, since only the original programmer and his fellow Redditors (and, ironically enough, a couple - literal couple - of /r/waifuism lurkers) would ever realize the pressing issue was the fact that the character would be very close to incapable of change. So maybe the perfect soldier or the perfect worker would be plausible, but not the perfect lover or the perfect politician, who lacked the ability to grow and adapt to the environment.
But it would take the world at large a long time to realize the limitations of creating your own cartoon character.
...
"at large". Because while the Redditors on /r/waifuism understood, there was also another group of people on a separate community who understood all too well the nature of a human being who could respond to stimuli, hold a conversation, and engage in interests, but all but lacked the ability to actually grow as a person and change from their experiences.
So in 2030 when the news broke loose to the world at large, there was a discussion started in one forum in one corner of the internet...
"Is Chris a cartoon character?"
His Waifu-Maker had proved it was not an impossible task. The fact that some Redditors had built their own based on the plans (they were on Reddit for nine years before he deleted them, after all) and brought their own waifus to life proved it was a replicable occurrence. Somehow, against all odds, an obsessed programmer and his love for a fictional character had created a machine that could bring fictional characters to life, provided there was sufficient information about them.
The plans were deleted and the proper authorities made a point to ensure that no one (else) could get their hands on them before breaking the news to the world at large. So, then, everyone learned the story of the programmer and Aiko, and everyone know that somehow, somewhere, it was possible to bring a character to life, even if the means had been intentionally destroyed.
So it sparked a debate. The plans still existed; they were being secretly held by the US government in the event that creating fictional characters could somehow be used to their advantage - creating superheroes to give the USA a further advantage in wartime, for instance, or using fictional characters as a source of free labor, since the plans the programmer had built created a character that didn't age, didn't suffer pain, and maybe even didn't need sustenance. Would that have been a sick and twisted use of the plans? Who knows? That's why there was a debate: wherein did the morality of creating fictional characters into a completely different reality lie?
It wouldn't have just been fictional characters that you could create, people quickly realized. The program generated its creations' personality based on the information about the character that was fed to it: episodes of the show in question, descriptions of the character's personality, really anything that could be used to show what the character was like. So, then, would it not be possible to create a human not part of a fictional canon by writing or creating media depicting them consistently and feeding that to the machine? Couldn't one theoretically create the perfect soldier, the perfect worker, the perfect lover, the perfect politician... all by designing a character with those traits and feeding it to the machine?
Well... so people thought. And maybe for some of that, it would have been plausible. But the biggest thing that people failed to realize - that people had no way of knowing, since only the original programmer and his fellow Redditors (and, ironically enough, a couple - literal couple - of /r/waifuism lurkers) would ever realize the pressing issue was the fact that the character would be very close to incapable of change. So maybe the perfect soldier or the perfect worker would be plausible, but not the perfect lover or the perfect politician, who lacked the ability to grow and adapt to the environment.
But it would take the world at large a long time to realize the limitations of creating your own cartoon character.
...
"at large". Because while the Redditors on /r/waifuism understood, there was also another group of people on a separate community who understood all too well the nature of a human being who could respond to stimuli, hold a conversation, and engage in interests, but all but lacked the ability to actually grow as a person and change from their experiences.
So in 2030 when the news broke loose to the world at large, there was a discussion started in one forum in one corner of the internet...
"Is Chris a cartoon character?"
Last edited:
bbpoison
kiwifarms.net
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- Jan 6, 2017
The mayans knew... about your waifu...gomenasai ^+^
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2014
- Joined
- Jan 30, 2015
I mean, the guy at the end's reaction really says it all.
- Joined
- Apr 28, 2017
Body pillows are sex toys. Exposing them to everyone to see is a sign of autism.
Nobody walks with an 8-inch dildo and shows it to everyone in the neighborhood.
Nobody walks with an 8-inch dildo and shows it to everyone in the neighborhood.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
Even as a sort of joke, it can reek of autism and embarassment. It's the equivalent to melon pan being out in a bar with his anime waifu or even this.
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E
ES 148
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kiwifarms.net
That was an interesting read. Your girlfriend is a terrific writer.
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- Aug 31, 2015
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What a shit-tier husbando
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- Feb 1, 2015
It was already an amusing photo, but what really put it over the top was the menorah.
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- Feb 13, 2017
Why does he have two dads
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