You Kiwis are a group of upstanding-denizens, many of you patriotic Americans who wish to better this world by exposing, chastising and humiliating those who act in ways you find ridiculous.
You do this not because it soothes your ego which Andrew Carnegie has taught us in "How to win friends and influence people" wants to always feel important and grow, but rather as a way of ensuring the continuation of a world free of subversives.
For this, Kiwis, I salute you. I'd post a salute GIF, but alas, I am not worthy of such privilege, nor am I in a position to use it. Perhaps some day I will rise within your strict caste system, and find myself perhaps even within the good graces of the king-autist himself, the bent, but unbroken Joshua Moon.
I am a long time lurker, but lurketh I no more! I am here to help you all better this world through the abuse of subversives!
I know many of you agree that Hitler saved Europe from the USSR, and I'm sure many of you will agree today that Russia saved America from Clinton. For this reason I'd like to propose we open our boards to the Russians.
I believe the next step in the rise of the Kiwi Farms is unification under our glorious meme-lord Joshua Moon. Please join me in the below vote in a pledge of loyalty to our dear leader. May his actions and those of his followers live on for eons!
Thank you for reading my introduction! Anything I can do to further the Kiwi cause, please let me know.
Hail Kiwi Farms! Hail Joshua Moon!!