- Joined
- Mar 24, 2016
What i head she was 18 +1 day when they announced they had become a couple!
DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion
- Thread starter A Witty Name
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- Apr 13, 2014
So, I used to mildly scoff at the idea of New Leanna being a mail order bride, but I've been sitting on this idea for a while and I've got to say I'm warming up to it. I am totally prepared for the influx of optimistic ratings, but hear me out!
LEANNA.RU - A CASE STUDY
1) Save the house!
Phil was very adamant that he needed his house or else the girl wouldn't date him. I believe this to be true, but for reasons different than you might imagine. Since Phil has been unemployed for the past 10 years (or at best, self-employed), convincing immigration that he would be able to sponsor a foreigner to get her visa would be almost impossible. UNLESS he put down the kahndo as some sort of collateral, to show that he does have funds. A two bedroom house is certainly more impressive to immigration officers than a bachelor bad in some "bad part of town in CT". And what's better than one property? Two properties and a car. That's why it was important. I might even go so far to say that this sudden interest in taxes and registration of his "business" would be to have further paperwork to prove his assets to the government.
2) Driver's license
Phil has also said that she needs to get her drivers license when she arrives. If I recall correctly, he said she needs to get her a new driver's license, implying that she had one before. So, if she lived in the US, it would be just a matter of paperwork and getting a new picture right? He makes it out to be like she needs to do some tests, get some lessons...perhaps because the driving laws are totally different there than where she lives? Like from a foreign country???
3) New phone
He also needs to provide her with a new phone. Not just a phone plan, but an entirely new phone. Perhaps because her old phone is locked due to a foreign provider and in Phil's peanut sized brain it would just be easier to get a new phone than to pay any sort of unlocking fee???
4) 3 date rule
We know from Phil that he has seen her 3 times before they fell madly in love with each other and decided to move in together. 3 times this girl hopped on a plane, with connection flights, and stayed a short time with Phil. That is an incredibly short amount of time to decide to move in with someone, specially someone like Phil. You know who else meets up with their potential lovers just like 2-3 before deciding to commit fully to a relationship? Men looking for a mail order bride (source: have watched tons of documentaries about mail order brides). They don't want to waste time and money flying them in more than that. And people like Phil wouldn't be caught dead leaving the US. Too scary, too much time away from his hardcore gaming schedule.
5) IKEA
Remember when Phil said that she had never been to IKEA before? Huge red flag. I checked and typical mail order bride countries do have IKEAs but not that many. Russia has 14, Slovakia has 1, Czech Republic has 4, Hungary has 3, Poland has 10, and Romania has 1. Obviously, most of the locations are in their capitals or larger cities, so it could be very well be that Deanna lives in a smaller town somewhere in Europe's Eastern block. Or just happens to not live in the town that has the IKEA. If she lived in the US, it'd be much harder to avoid an IKEA.
6) Phil has a huge ego
Phil is all about appearances. He wants something that looks good and that doesn't require a lot of him. A mail order bride would be the perfect fit for this. He could get a decent looking girlfriend without ever having stepped out of the house. One who additionally, probably doesn't require much of an emotional or physical investment. One of the first thing Phil has ever said about New Leanna was that she loved to cook and clean. Wow! Strangely enough a lot of the men in those mail order bride documentaries say the same thing. It's weirdly specific. Also, if her English is poor, that's even better, because then she won't steal Phil's limelight. He probably fears a woman who is cooler than him like hell. Leanna was annoying, but when she burned him on cam, you could see his manhood slip away and his rage silently build. New Leanna's lack of grasp on the English language would be much easier to show dominance over.
Now I know what you're thinking. Phil wouldn't shell out money for a mail order bride. Or would he? Didn't he just shell out $+100 for a chair just to save face from a failed sponsorship??? Is it that much of a stretch to think he would shell out money to try to save face from a failed relationship? We know Phil isn't exactly good with his money and spends it on the dumbest things where more money = better, which is why the escort saga was so damn believable (RIP). So who's to say he wouldn't shell out a few thousand dollars to a russian bride agency?
7) She's undoxable dood!!
In Phil's mind, doxing is the same as googling. I don't believe for a second that she has no social media. However, we know that in different parts of the world, people use different social media. For example, in China, people use Weibo or Wechat instead of Facebook usually. In Brazil, for the longest time, people used Orkut (RIP). In Russia one might use VK. Maybe Phil thinks that if someone uses the Cyrillic alphabet instead of roman/latin letters, they're impossible to google, therefore dox. If you can't understand what you're reading, then it's the same as it not existing. This would also fit Phil's constant semantics game. 'She doesn't have [american/mainstream] social media *snort*"
Phil has gouty fat butt
Get real, no woman would date Phil. If this really is a naïve child, a parent would intervene because of the age difference, the cross country move, the sudden decision to move at all after 3 dates. Leanna was different because they had been internet dating for a while before packing up and moving in together. She's not a hobo because she has a videogame system. She's not going to lug that around if she is homeless. Phil is a scummy disgusting manchild who readily admits that as soon as his soulmate gets there, she has to clean out his ex-fiancée's office, clean his house, cook for him and then stay the hell out of his mancave. No woman, not even a broken halfway house adolescent girl would date someone like this.
I rest my case
LEANNA.RU - A CASE STUDY
1) Save the house!
Phil was very adamant that he needed his house or else the girl wouldn't date him. I believe this to be true, but for reasons different than you might imagine. Since Phil has been unemployed for the past 10 years (or at best, self-employed), convincing immigration that he would be able to sponsor a foreigner to get her visa would be almost impossible. UNLESS he put down the kahndo as some sort of collateral, to show that he does have funds. A two bedroom house is certainly more impressive to immigration officers than a bachelor bad in some "bad part of town in CT". And what's better than one property? Two properties and a car. That's why it was important. I might even go so far to say that this sudden interest in taxes and registration of his "business" would be to have further paperwork to prove his assets to the government.
2) Driver's license
Phil has also said that she needs to get her drivers license when she arrives. If I recall correctly, he said she needs to get her a new driver's license, implying that she had one before. So, if she lived in the US, it would be just a matter of paperwork and getting a new picture right? He makes it out to be like she needs to do some tests, get some lessons...perhaps because the driving laws are totally different there than where she lives? Like from a foreign country???
3) New phone
He also needs to provide her with a new phone. Not just a phone plan, but an entirely new phone. Perhaps because her old phone is locked due to a foreign provider and in Phil's peanut sized brain it would just be easier to get a new phone than to pay any sort of unlocking fee???
4) 3 date rule
We know from Phil that he has seen her 3 times before they fell madly in love with each other and decided to move in together. 3 times this girl hopped on a plane, with connection flights, and stayed a short time with Phil. That is an incredibly short amount of time to decide to move in with someone, specially someone like Phil. You know who else meets up with their potential lovers just like 2-3 before deciding to commit fully to a relationship? Men looking for a mail order bride (source: have watched tons of documentaries about mail order brides). They don't want to waste time and money flying them in more than that. And people like Phil wouldn't be caught dead leaving the US. Too scary, too much time away from his hardcore gaming schedule.
5) IKEA
Remember when Phil said that she had never been to IKEA before? Huge red flag. I checked and typical mail order bride countries do have IKEAs but not that many. Russia has 14, Slovakia has 1, Czech Republic has 4, Hungary has 3, Poland has 10, and Romania has 1. Obviously, most of the locations are in their capitals or larger cities, so it could be very well be that Deanna lives in a smaller town somewhere in Europe's Eastern block. Or just happens to not live in the town that has the IKEA. If she lived in the US, it'd be much harder to avoid an IKEA.
6) Phil has a huge ego
Phil is all about appearances. He wants something that looks good and that doesn't require a lot of him. A mail order bride would be the perfect fit for this. He could get a decent looking girlfriend without ever having stepped out of the house. One who additionally, probably doesn't require much of an emotional or physical investment. One of the first thing Phil has ever said about New Leanna was that she loved to cook and clean. Wow! Strangely enough a lot of the men in those mail order bride documentaries say the same thing. It's weirdly specific. Also, if her English is poor, that's even better, because then she won't steal Phil's limelight. He probably fears a woman who is cooler than him like hell. Leanna was annoying, but when she burned him on cam, you could see his manhood slip away and his rage silently build. New Leanna's lack of grasp on the English language would be much easier to show dominance over.
Now I know what you're thinking. Phil wouldn't shell out money for a mail order bride. Or would he? Didn't he just shell out $+100 for a chair just to save face from a failed sponsorship??? Is it that much of a stretch to think he would shell out money to try to save face from a failed relationship? We know Phil isn't exactly good with his money and spends it on the dumbest things where more money = better, which is why the escort saga was so damn believable (RIP). So who's to say he wouldn't shell out a few thousand dollars to a russian bride agency?
7) She's undoxable dood!!
In Phil's mind, doxing is the same as googling. I don't believe for a second that she has no social media. However, we know that in different parts of the world, people use different social media. For example, in China, people use Weibo or Wechat instead of Facebook usually. In Brazil, for the longest time, people used Orkut (RIP). In Russia one might use VK. Maybe Phil thinks that if someone uses the Cyrillic alphabet instead of roman/latin letters, they're impossible to google, therefore dox. If you can't understand what you're reading, then it's the same as it not existing. This would also fit Phil's constant semantics game. 'She doesn't have [american/mainstream] social media *snort*"
Phil has gouty fat buttGet real, no woman would date Phil. If this really is a naïve child, a parent would intervene because of the age difference, the cross country move, the sudden decision to move at all after 3 dates. Leanna was different because they had been internet dating for a while before packing up and moving in together. She's not a hobo because she has a videogame system. She's not going to lug that around if she is homeless. Phil is a scummy disgusting manchild who readily admits that as soon as his soulmate gets there, she has to clean out his ex-fiancée's office, clean his house, cook for him and then stay the hell out of his mancave. No woman, not even a broken halfway house adolescent girl would date someone like this.
I rest my case
Last edited:
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2018
So I skipped through PHILadelphia's MHW Beta play. He used hammer, lance, longsword, greatsword ... and I see no gunlance? Please explain. Was there another event?
Honestly he wasn't thaaaat bad. Sure, he stood knee deep in poison without realizing. Sure, his verbal interaction with his comrades was nearly non existent so he talked mostly with himself (meanwhile: They talked with each other). Also "You stupid idiots from capcom", sure, we can't go on without that. And he got really salty with Rathalos, suddenly not a game he likes (because there is a challenge and the win wasn't handed over to him on a silver plate).
I also see that this game can be really boring for him when 4 players are involved. Many monsters can't really unfold their potential with so many players, you can't learn these monsters, much of the fun goes down the pipe and it's difficult to see how the concept unfolds. Additional players are useful if you want to mass hunt a creature for armor and weapons or if it is very difficult (I love to hunt alone because the challenge is quite fun). But if you do this all the time, watching a playthrough of it is not entertaining, if Phil is involved. And Phil can't fly to the game's end so of course he won't play the full release even so many people want to see that.
So yeah, thanks for the suggestion, DiabeticSP. I think I understand his baby struggles.
Honestly he wasn't thaaaat bad. Sure, he stood knee deep in poison without realizing. Sure, his verbal interaction with his comrades was nearly non existent so he talked mostly with himself (meanwhile: They talked with each other). Also "You stupid idiots from capcom", sure, we can't go on without that. And he got really salty with Rathalos, suddenly not a game he likes (because there is a challenge and the win wasn't handed over to him on a silver plate).
I also see that this game can be really boring for him when 4 players are involved. Many monsters can't really unfold their potential with so many players, you can't learn these monsters, much of the fun goes down the pipe and it's difficult to see how the concept unfolds. Additional players are useful if you want to mass hunt a creature for armor and weapons or if it is very difficult (I love to hunt alone because the challenge is quite fun). But if you do this all the time, watching a playthrough of it is not entertaining, if Phil is involved. And Phil can't fly to the game's end so of course he won't play the full release even so many people want to see that.
So yeah, thanks for the suggestion, DiabeticSP. I think I understand his baby struggles.
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2014
Mr. T. Anon,
I suggest you tend to your children before posting, then.
Sincerely,
Kiwi Farms shitty DSP board.
I suggest you tend to your children before posting, then.
Sincerely,
Kiwi Farms shitty DSP board.
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2017
So, I used to mildly scoff at the idea of New Leanna being a mail order bride, but I've been sitting on this idea for a while and I've got to say I'm warming up to it. I am totally prepared for the influx of optimistic ratings, but hear me out!
LEANNA.RU - A CASE STUDY
1) Save the house!
Phil was very adamant that he needed his house or else the girl wouldn't date him. I believe this to be true, but for reasons different than you might imagine. Since Phil has been unemployed for the past 10 years (or at best, self-employed), convincing immigration that he would be able to sponsor a foreigner to get her visa would be almost impossible. UNLESS he put down the kahndo as some sort of collateral, to show that he does have funds. A two bedroom house is certainly more impressive to immigration officers than a bachelor bad in some "bad part of town in CT". And what's better than one property? Two properties and a car. That's why it was important. I might even go so far to say that this sudden interest in taxes and registration of his "business" would be to have further paperwork to prove his assets to the government.
2) Driver's license
Phil has also said that she needs to get her drivers license when she arrives. If I recall correctly, he said she needs to get her a new driver's license, implying that she had one before. So, if she lived in the US, it would be just a matter of paperwork and getting a new picture right? He makes it out to be like she needs to do some tests, get some lessons...perhaps because the driving laws are totally different there than where she lives? Like from a foreign country???
3) New phone
He also needs to provide her with a new phone. Not just a phone plan, but an entirely new phone. Perhaps because her old phone is locked due to a foreign provider and in Phil's peanut sized brain it would just be easier to get a new phone than to pay any sort of unlocking fee???
4) 3 date rule
We know from Phil that he has seen her 3 times before they fell madly in love with each other and decided to move in together. 3 times this girl hopped on a plane, with connection flights, and stayed a short time with Phil. That is an incredibly short amount of time to decide to move in with someone, specially someone like Phil. You know who else meets up with their potential lovers just like 2-3 before deciding to commit fully to a relationship? Men looking for a mail order bride (source: have watched tons of documentaries about mail order brides). They don't want to waste time and money flying them in more than that. And people like Phil wouldn't be caught dead leaving the US. Too scary, too much time away from his hardcore gaming schedule.
5) Phil has a huge ego
Phil is all about appearances. He wants something that looks good and that doesn't require a lot of him. A mail order bride would be the perfect fit for this. He could get a decent looking girlfriend without ever having stepped out of the house. One who additionally, probably doesn't require much of an emotional or physical investment. One of the first thing Phil has ever said about New Leanna was that she loved to cook and clean. Wow! Strangely enough a lot of the men in those mail order bride documentaries say the same thing. It's weirdly specific. Also, if her English is poor, that's even better, because then she won't steal Phil's limelight. He probably fears a woman who is cooler than him like hell. Leanna was annoying, but when she burned him on cam, you could see his manhood slip away and his rage silently build. New Leanna's lack of grasp on the English language would be much easier to show dominance over.
Now I know what you're thinking. Phil wouldn't shell out money for a mail order bride. Or would he? Didn't he just shell out $+100 for a chair just to save face from a failed sponsorship??? Is it that much of a stretch to think he would shell out money to try to save face from a failed relationship? We know Phil isn't exactly good with his money and spends it on the dumbest things where more money = better, which is why the escort saga was so damn believable (RIP). So who's to say he wouldn't shell out a few thousand dollars to a russian bride agency?
6) She's undoxable dood!!
In Phil's mind, doxing is the same as googling. I don't believe for a second that she has no social media. However, we know that in different parts of the world, people use different social media. For example, in China, people use Weibo or Wechat instead of Facebook usually. In Brazil, for the longest time, people used Orkut (RIP). In Russia one might use VK. Maybe Phil thinks that if someone uses the Cyrillic alphabet instead of roman/latin letters, they're impossible to google, therefore dox. If you can't understand what you're reading, then it's the same as it not existing. This would also fit Phil's constant semantics game. 'She doesn't have [american/mainstream] social media *snort*"
7) Phil has gouty fat butt
Get real, no woman would date Phil. If this really is a naïve child, a parent would intervene because of the age difference, the cross country move, the sudden decision to move at all after 3 dates. Leanna was different because they had been internet dating for a while before packing up and moving in together. She's not a hobo because she has a videogame system. She's not going to lug that around if she is homeless. Phil is a scummy disgusting manchild who readily admits that as soon as his soulmate gets there, she has to clean out his ex-fiancée's office, clean his house, cook for him and then stay the hell out of his mancave. No woman, not even a broken halfway house adolescent girl would date someone like this.
I rest my case
Well we theoretically get to see what DSP is like once he gets laid (or as a lady who runs a soap business and wears a fedora might call it "underwear time"):
DSP gonna get laid and the birds and bees will be fluttering with life at the Château du Gout... I can't wait for the DSPositivity to shine!
DiabeticSP
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2017
That one's on me unless he played beta 2 and 3. Must have remembered gunlance instead of normal lance cause I didn't go back to check.
Kamatsubu
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2017
That's such a Harvey Weinstein way for him to say that.
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2017
Photos of various men who have had "underwear time" and sport a happy look about them:
Photos of DSP after "underwear time":
Photos of DSP after "underwear time":
- Joined
- Oct 8, 2017
Well, you make a convincing argument. I´ve considered the mail-order bride possible but did´t know how to explain why she´d go in and out of the country, and that sounds like the perfect explanations.
There was a ton of other things you mentioned that I haven´t even considered but do make sense. I mean, your story and explanations make much more sense than all the tidbits Phil has spewn.
ZipZop
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2018
prediction: By the end of the year Phil and his SoulMaid will be married. "We're so in love, you guys *snort* alright? Also, the TAXES are cheaper so huh huh huh it just makes sense, alright *snort*."
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2014
Nah, she will be long gone by then. She will have her job and meet interesting folks and realize DSP is boring and old and she wants to have a life. Just like Leanna. Remember, if Leanna got her job as soon as they moved in, she woulda been out of there sooner.
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2017
I hope he livestreams the wedding and has to awkwardly glance at the screen to see mentions of Tyrone and Leanna.
ZipZop
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2018
Unless she really can't stand him it would make no sense to leave without getting some cha-ching in return. Leeanna was pretty fucking stupid and emotional in general. This lady with the "soul mate" shit makes me think she's playing him, and we all know how bad Phil is at playing.
You may kiss the bride.
"Huh huh huh. What do I do?" looks at chat "Huh huh. I have no idea what to do."
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2014
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2017
My previous prediction before Kimberlie Brink appeared was a woman from Europe (I have a screenshot somewhere).
I think there may be that whoever this person is (whether my prediction is accurate or not) may have been a university student who recently finished their studies either in the US or abroad. "mail order bride" is a pretty specific term though, there are plenty of women who wants "relationships of convenience" (i.e. sugar daddy).
If you take someone from some of the poorer European countries where the average monthly wage is less than 500 euros you can see that even 1-2000 dollars a month to shack up with DSP wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.
Anyway, once all is revealed we'll be able to figure out whether Kimberlie Brink would've ended up cheaper than an "real actual girlfriend". Whether she's his soul mate, a mail order bride, someone who wants a sugar daddy or someone who actually genuinely loves him there's not much pussy that doesn't have a price tag.
BallBuster
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2017
The mail order bride scenario is a highly plausible one. Especially if she is sporting broken English and an accent. Her mannerisms will be a Dead giveaway as well.
Now if that is the case, she will have to hang around for a while and need to get married to even apply for a temp green card. I won’t get into why that isn’t as easy as it once was until we have more information on her.
But if she is a mail order bride, he only has so much time on her visa before he has to marry the girl or she gets sent back (I think). This could be his ultimate undoing and 2 things will happen:
Scenario A: She pushes for marriage so she can stay, and he is hesitant. She holds the power at this point because she could easily blackmail him, so him trying to force her to sign a prenup won’t even work. They break up and she gets sent back and all the dirt comes out at that point.
Scenario B: She has his nuts in a vice and he caves and marries her with no prenup (again she has the power). She could easily file for divorce 6-12 months later on the grounds that he treats her like shit and would rather spend 12 hours a day playing video games than be with her (which there will be ample video evidence of to back up her claims). He loses half his money and house and is truly fucked.
These are all hypotheticals but it is something we can dive into more once we hear her speak. An accent at this point will be the nail in the coffin and almost assure us she is a mail order bride.
Now if that is the case, she will have to hang around for a while and need to get married to even apply for a temp green card. I won’t get into why that isn’t as easy as it once was until we have more information on her.
But if she is a mail order bride, he only has so much time on her visa before he has to marry the girl or she gets sent back (I think). This could be his ultimate undoing and 2 things will happen:
Scenario A: She pushes for marriage so she can stay, and he is hesitant. She holds the power at this point because she could easily blackmail him, so him trying to force her to sign a prenup won’t even work. They break up and she gets sent back and all the dirt comes out at that point.
Scenario B: She has his nuts in a vice and he caves and marries her with no prenup (again she has the power). She could easily file for divorce 6-12 months later on the grounds that he treats her like shit and would rather spend 12 hours a day playing video games than be with her (which there will be ample video evidence of to back up her claims). He loses half his money and house and is truly fucked.
These are all hypotheticals but it is something we can dive into more once we hear her speak. An accent at this point will be the nail in the coffin and almost assure us she is a mail order bride.
Sparkletor
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2017
There is another possibility. She could be dumb and gullible and believe everything he has and will tell her. Just like a dsp fan.
DiabeticSP
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2017
I'm sure he followed the Leanna play book. Let's see how hard he skirts about her age.
- Joined
- Jan 13, 2018
Hopefully Fallout comes 5 out on the day of the wedding, love to see what he would about that
StylishAcolyte
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2017
- Status