So he saved 50 dollars by shipping her stuff to the Fedex store. But he bought a handcart to move it all...okay. He could have just asked the Fedex guy to help him move the stuff inside for a small tip. DSP logic is great.
He wouldnt tip anyone else. He needs that money, okay, he really does. They should get a real fucking job, like streaming on twitch. If you knew how much work.... The man cant even get groceries, he just doesnt have time! God could you be more disrespectful?
Plus, that interaction would be too much human interaction for Phil, and too much subtle or unnatural interaction. Phil likes interactions that he knows, that are formulaic, like the cashier saying "Have a nice day", "Thanks, you too!" or "Here's 10 cents DSP please notice me!" "Just because you gave me money, if I notice you, that's an extra privilege on top, that's a gift because Im so fucking selfless, YOU should be thanking ME, by another 10 cent donation, thanks for the money, dummy!" Rather than the subtleties involved in insinuating you'll tip or bribe the dude to go out of his way, above and beyond, to do something extra, and you dont know how he's gonna react, and being suave throughout it, there's just too much uncertainty for Phil, any added stress will turn his hair completely grey.
Regarding his girlfriend: someone earlier in the thread brought up that she might have been homeless or have drug problems or something? They gave more reasons and were more concise in them. Honestly, that was my conspiracy--unless he's robbing the cradle again. But what's funny is he's so selfish, the motherfucker gets more hard over the thought of a woman in an apron with a list of chores in one hand and a sandwich in the other, he gets more hard for that than anything else. He wont look past what (he thinks, fantasizes) she's gonna do for him, he doesnt notice or care about this shit, or wonder about any potential red flags.
Im expecting the emergency blogs, and lots of whining about trouble in paradise, pretty soon after she moves in.
