Ok, so I used work cleaning houses, shopping for, bathing, dressing, and wiping the shit of elderly and disabled individuals. Menial stuff anyone without a criminal background could do. Most of my clients were elderly and very sweet.
But one, Christina, was a lolcow. She was about my age, had mental health issues (schizophrenia) and was FAT. We're talking Hamberlynn size before gastric bypass. She had a shitty personality, was always grumpy, a perpetual victim, refused to do anything for herself in the apartment.
TBF, it was literally my job to clean her apartment, and I didn't really mind. I wasn't responsible (actually I was explicitly told I was not to do so under any circumstances, and with Christina I soon learned why the rule was in place. Do it one time, do it forever.) for cleaning up after her dogs though, and like Amber, she was too lazy to house train completely or pad train them completely. I stepped over a lot of poop. She was good about picking it up when she noticed it, but one day her dog pooped in her bed and I had to ask her to clean it up before I could change the bed.
She conned the state into paying for her bypass, but refused to do anything to actually lose the weight. She wouldn't exercise. She would take her dogs out to pee, and come right back in.
All she did was watch TV, go to Walmart, go to the nursing home where here husband was (he was much older and had had a stroke, he ended up coming home for a while and I took care of him full time. I quite liked him.), went to church, and I think that was all she did. She had a second bedroom full of stuff she never used. In the year and a half I worked there, she went into the room three times.
Anyway, back to fat. She had lost about a hundred pounds before I met her, but still had a hundred and fifty to go to get to normal. Her doctors were constantly telling her she should be losing more weight than she was losing (she had basically stalled when I started, I don't think she lost any weight the whole time I was there).
Part of my job was to cook for her, I like to cook, so I did so happily. Most of the time she had a cheese and ham sandwich with "lots of mayo". Probably 300-400 calories just in mayo (mayo is 100 calories per tablespoon generally speaking). She guzzled sweet tea like water. She hated water, and wouldn't use artificial sweetener. She would also buy and drink sodas. She talked frequently about how she was sinning by drinking tea, because she was Mormon, but she drank it anyway.
Amazingly she wasn't diabetic, but artificial sweetener would have, at least, saved a ton of calories.
Tea was made every other day or so. A gallon of water. Four cups of sugar. Four packets if tea mix bag things (I hate tea, don't know what they are called). Stir. Refrigerate.
She ate bigger meals at dinner. I'd thaw a half pound tube of meat, she'd cook it, some spaghetti, and sauce, and eat all of it. There were never leftovers. Not even of the meat. Half a pound of beef is quite a bit for one person.
One of the other rules the group I worked with was "never give your number to a client". I was an exceptional individual and broke that rule because I'm too fucking nice to say no. She called nightly. And had nothing to say. Literally nothing. Her therapist fired her for calling after hours too often, so I wasn't the only exceptional individual in her orbit.
She eventually got a boyfriend (while being married) and because I was now picking up after two people and doing the dishes for two people, beside boyfriend was a cow too, I got in trouble with work. Then boyfriend started sleeping during the time I was there working, so I couldn't clean the bedroom (which had become a sty through no fault of my own, she got lazier when boyfriend moved in).
Finally she refused to answer the door one morning. Her car was there, but no one answered. I called work to see if she was in the hospital (she would sometimes get sucidial abd check herself into a mental hospital, and it was her responsibility to let the company know). She had not called in, I had a long discussion about what had been going in the last few months (she was becoming more hostile towards me in general as well), they already had talked to her about boyfriend sleeping while I was there. We decided I could no longer work for her.
She has no internet presence, sadly, otherwise she might have potential. But she's probably just too boring.
Oh, and she was staunchly Republican and anti-welfare despite her tugboat.
I know, off-topic, but Christina is what Amber would be like if she had surgery. Still a cow.
