DSP's Loan & Savings Company

[neger psykolog]

@AckAckNothingICouldDo posted this in the megathread:

 

[BlockedByDaylight]

Kind of hard to feel any amount of pity for this asshole when he has a house, a condo, a new BMW, and a girlfriend with a real job.

"Some things are more important than money. Real talk."

*Not even 24 hours later

"So I owe 4k, guys. I really need the money, I really do. I need it ... to pay muh bills ..."

 

[JustStopDude]

As an expat worker, reading Phil complain about the complexity of his taxes is very funny to me.

 

[JustFuckinaDude]

1k In lawyer fees? Can't he just go to H&R block or TurboTax or something?

As I understand it, they're not really tax experts; they undergo some modicum of training, but they're basically putting the numbers into more or less the same software you can buy for yourself. They won't even give you someone to point to if the paperwork isn't done correctly; you're on your own.

For something as big as years of unpaid taxes, you don't want to cheap out or try to DIY it (coughOnisioncough). It could be far more costly in the long run if you fuck it up.

Edit: spelling

 

[Lysol]

snip

Ah, sorry, I forgot who we're dealing with here and his history with his taxes. Silly me was thinking like someone who lives within their means and understands that whilst shitty taxes are as inevitable as death so might as well get them done on time, not like someone who gets up to their eyeballs in debt while trying to act as if though taxes are something that can be put off indefinitely at will like vacuuming or dusting.

 

[neger psykolog]

As I understand it, they're not really tax experts; they undergo some modicum of training, but they're basically putting the numbers into more or less than same software you can buy for yourself. They won't even give you someone to point to if the paperwork isn't done correctly; you're on your own.

For something as big as years of unpaid taxes, you don't want to cheap out or try to DIY it (coughOnisioncough). It could be far more costly in the long run if you fuck it up.

While true, there is nothing to stop someone with book smarts from doing it all themselves and making sure they do it correctly. It would require a significant amount of time initially to understand everything, but its certainly not impossible.

But this is DSP.

 

[Surly Muppet]

"If a miracle happened and I somehow raised the $4k in 9 days, I would be in an incredibly better position and feel way more positive about things than I do now, since I wouldn’t be $4k behind on my taxes from the get-go and could just focus on the future. But I’m not really expecting said miracle to happen."

Miracle is an understatement.
This is the Prayer of the Paypig in terms of begging.

So the business taxes, if I'm reading this right, were $4k for the year, which was on top of the $4k federal taxes. But those business taxes did not include the back taxes that he owes? And doesn't that meant the back taxes would be around $12k? That's hefty even on a payment plan. No amount of begging is going to rectify this. Though Phil has mentioned the January federal taxes multiple times, he has rarely (maybe once?) implied there were also business taxes in there. So I'm a little skeptical on that breakdown.

o are we seeing the continuation of the saga? I thought he was gonna start easing off the tax sub-plot but it looks like he might start kicking it into overdrive.

Yeah, I thought he was done with this as well after how the birthday stream went. But this is dropping the gauntlet. The staycation will dictate my skepticism though. If it's still happening, I still vote this is a ruse.

book smarts

There's your problem. Our boy Phillip passed up book smarts for the real smarts. He only knows the taxes of the STREET.

 

[grump]

I think phil is setting us up for where nobody will notice when kat leaves by hamming up the conspicuous absences with excuses about how cam shy she is. Heck I'm beginning to wonder if he even has a gf at this point, or if kat is just some maid or escort he hires out every now and then. The only evidence against that is the meals which he's too lazy to cook by himself. Guess when he stops instagramming that we will know.

 

[NoMoreFarLeft]

While true, there is nothing to stop someone with book smarts from doing it all themselves and making sure they do it correctly. It would require a significant amount of time initially to understand everything, but its certainly not impossible.

But this is DSP.

And this is correct. DSP is royally getting fucked by this accountant if he is paying this much. His finances are not that fucking complicated. He doesn't have investments (domestic or foreign), employees, or have to calculate large scale depreciation on assets. He has a set income that did come in with the preprepared documentation GIVEN to him. It goes to show how incredibly inept he is at the most basic of tasks if he can't make it through on his own.

To the Surly Muppet, he has mentioned back Federal taxes (after initially denying he owed the federal government), back state taxes, and back state business taxes. I don't think we will ever get a complete picture of how much he actually owes unless government documents were to leak. Even then I don't doubt he is fucked. He is piss poor with managing money and has cried wolf too many times for people to want to help anymore.

 

[ISP]

@AckAckNothingICouldDo posted this in the megathread:

Spoiler

Many a ewhore would be so utterly grateful to have the kind of paypigs DSP has really gathered some top minds.

 

[samovski]

I think phil is setting us up for where nobody will notice when kat leaves by hamming up the conspicuous absences with excuses about how cam shy she is. Heck I'm beginning to wonder if he even has a gf at this point, or if kat is just some maid or escort he hires out every now and then. The only evidence against that is the meals which he's too lazy to cook by himself. Guess when he stops instagramming that we will know.

Not gonna lie, the idea of them not being in a relationship has crossed my mind before. Or at the very least the idea that it's a relationship of convenience and not feelings. The fact he keeps hamming up how his girl is doing this and his girl is doing that. But this could just be he can't believe his luck that another woman lets him touch her fun parts.

Especially when he was shit talking Leanna. He was saying he had someone who was looking out for him and stuff like that. So either he is in a relationship or he's a hell of an actor. I think it's a little of my autism flaring just in complete and utter disbelief that someone who publicly acts like this could get an apparently "sweet and caring girl". Sadly though, he wouldn't be the 1st asshole to have a nice woman, he wouldn't even be the worst.

 

[AkAuZtIk]

So he has been doing this for close to ten years? And.. somehow doesn't know as a self employed individual he has to withhold his own taxes? If he hasn't been doing that, then he's been paying lump sum every year for federal so would definitely know how much his federal taxes was. If he made more this year than he did the previous... yet made more money with machinima... Holy Lord, for anyone to buy this you would HAVE to except that Phil is the dumbest person on the planet...

 

[JamFlowMan]

Yeah, I thought he was done with this as well after how the birthday stream went. But this is dropping the gauntlet. The staycation will dictate my skepticism though. If it's still happening, I still vote this is a ruse.

How many of his fans do you think have ever had 4k in their bank accounts at one time? If any of this even has a "snippet of truth" in there a staycation anytime this year would be insane, which is why it will be hilarious when he announces one.

 

[actually]

Somebody work out what his annual income is/was based on that $4k federal payment (which would be $16k annual). Also, his state business taxes from last year + attorney fees cost him $5k in January? Assuming the attorney fee was another $1k, that would be $4k, and at the highest possible rate, would mean he made $266,666, which doesn't make even remote sense. What am I missing here?

 

[neger psykolog]

Somebody work out what his annual income is/was based on that $4k federal payment (which would be $16k annual). Also, his state business taxes from last year + attorney fees cost him $5k in January? Assuming the attorney fee was another $1k, that would be $4k, and at the highest possible rate, would mean he made $266,666, which doesn't make even remote sense. What am I missing here?

From what I gather, the federal taxes he pays each quarter are not a flat rate, they fluctuate depending on his income.

 

[actually]

Bruh, he paid multiple thousands of dollars just for the 2017 state business taxes? The highest rate is 1.5%...how much fucking income did he have? If he made an even $100k, he would owe only $1500 in business tax. What the actual fuck?

 

[James Smith]

Wait wait wait wait wait...

He said $5K for his 2017 state taxes, and that he doesn't know how much his unpaid taxes for years past is yet. Did DSP make fucking $350 thousand dollars in 2017?

 

[AkAuZtIk]

How many of his fans do you think have ever had 4k in their bank accounts at one time? If any of this even has a "snippet of truth" in there a staycation anytime this year would be insane, which is why it will be hilarious when he announces one.

Remember everyone, we have NOTHING to worry about. Phil said it himself, as soon as those newly anticipated releases come out in the next few months he will be fine!

Edit: I went back and reread it. How is he surprised about his estimated tax payment? Heres the thing, I make money from a family business, and you DO NOT have to pay your estimated tax payment every quarter, you can choose to pay it all at the end of the year, like he is here for 2017, it involves an extra charge. Now, it is more cost effective to do it quarterly, but I have in fact, payed it all in my federal filing. Here for more info: https://www.irs.gov/taxtopics/tc306

2 Edit: Favorite quote: "Generally, taxpayers should make estimated tax payments in four equal amounts to avoid a penalty. However, if you receive income unevenly during the year, you may be able to vary the amounts of the payments to avoid or lower the penalty by using the annualized installment method."

 

[actually]

From what I gather, the federal taxes he pays each quarter are not a flat rate, they fluctuate depending on his income.

Sure, but you could ballpark his income based on owing $4k for the first quarter too. The state business tax is the one blowing my mind, since that's apparently ONLY for 2017.

 

[Waveysauce]

Im shocked he still wont realize that maybe his few fans left are sick of the daily schilling. they want to see game play and not an hour each day dedicated to taxes and 15 mins to stupid shout outs from 16 year olds like derich (who has to have someone else use their own bits) asking trivial shit like who his fav wrestler is. They get all that bs and no game play.

If he would look at how awful this whole birthweek thing went maybe he would try to change things up. If he didnt schill everyday then maybe when he really did need the money he could do an emergency beggathon every month or 2. but with how the one from before went it made him get greedy and he thought he had his golden ticket

I really would be shocked if his remaining cult will be any bit surprised and taken back when he does the same thing next week. just like that long essay stated was he was going to need huge help for 4 diff months.

eventually they will all slowly leave like what has happened already

no only will he barley make shit in 9 days. but id bet that he wont even hit his sub goal in a few days....which is SUPER sad. because a loyal follow could just easily gift a few subs for a small amount of $. fact of that not happening should really give him a reality check