'I have so much regret': Former online troll who once spent FIVE HOURS a day abusing people online admits she is 'haunted' by the cruel messages she sent strangers from her basement
A reformed internet troll who spent 12,000 hours bullying strangers from her basement has admitted that she is 'haunted' by the horrible words she once posted while sharing a heartfelt video apology to her victims.
Landon Eason, 61, logged onto the computer every night for five years and downed cans of beer while unleashing a torrent of cruel insults on random people.
The former medical interpreter would lurk on chess forums and chatrooms and befriend fellow web users before bombarding them with abuse.
In total, she estimates she spent 12,000 hours telling other users they were worthless, valueless and invisible - things that had been said to her as a little girl.
Landon, who was known online as Funnychickfromstlouis and CBSmudge, says the pizza and booze-fueled tirades helped her cope with the cruelty she suffered as a child.
Now sober ten years, Landon says her trolling days are over but said she remains haunted by guilt and wants to apologize to her victims.
The divorcee from St. Louis, Missouri said, 'When I first started interacting with people online it was positive and I would go onto MSN groups and chess websites to try and make friends, but it turned negative.
'Because of what I learned from my family, I was burdened with deeply rooted self-loathing, shame, disgust, terror and embarrassment.
'So, when I encountered some unsuspecting soul online who did not know who I was, rage and hatred burst out of my mouth.
'I would see someone make a rude comment and just lash out at them. I would say the most atrocious shameful things.
'Looking back, I was saying the things that I wanted to say to my family and everyone who had hurt me.
'When I was little my family would say things like, "You are invisible," "Nothing you have to say is of any value," "You will never amount to anything."'
'I say the same cruel things to people in chatrooms, but with toxic language too. I would call people c***s and tell people to f**k off.
'I was repeatedly bounced out of chatrooms for my hateful behavior because I would just unload everything on these strangers.'
Landon's net addiction went hand in hand with alcoholism, which she battled for more than 30 years and resulted in her losing her house.
She said each night she would gorge on a large pizza washed down with two tall cans of beer as well as several rum and cokes and margaritas.
Her tirades would last five hours every day after work and on weekends, she would barely leave her basement at all.
In 2007, she finally realized she was 'worn out' so she began attending AA meetings and undergoing psychotherapy in a bid to escape her vices and has been sober for over a decade, admitting she's in a much happier place but revealed her trolling days haunt her.
Landon, who has fibromyalgia, which causes chronic pain and fatigue said: 'My family was monstrously abusive and it almost destroyed me. It was horrible. I never felt safe, I never felt good enough.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/a...nt-abusive-messages-strangers-five-years.html
A reformed internet troll who spent 12,000 hours bullying strangers from her basement has admitted that she is 'haunted' by the horrible words she once posted while sharing a heartfelt video apology to her victims.
Landon Eason, 61, logged onto the computer every night for five years and downed cans of beer while unleashing a torrent of cruel insults on random people.
The former medical interpreter would lurk on chess forums and chatrooms and befriend fellow web users before bombarding them with abuse.
In total, she estimates she spent 12,000 hours telling other users they were worthless, valueless and invisible - things that had been said to her as a little girl.
Landon, who was known online as Funnychickfromstlouis and CBSmudge, says the pizza and booze-fueled tirades helped her cope with the cruelty she suffered as a child.
Now sober ten years, Landon says her trolling days are over but said she remains haunted by guilt and wants to apologize to her victims.
The divorcee from St. Louis, Missouri said, 'When I first started interacting with people online it was positive and I would go onto MSN groups and chess websites to try and make friends, but it turned negative.
'Because of what I learned from my family, I was burdened with deeply rooted self-loathing, shame, disgust, terror and embarrassment.
'So, when I encountered some unsuspecting soul online who did not know who I was, rage and hatred burst out of my mouth.
'I would see someone make a rude comment and just lash out at them. I would say the most atrocious shameful things.
'Looking back, I was saying the things that I wanted to say to my family and everyone who had hurt me.
'When I was little my family would say things like, "You are invisible," "Nothing you have to say is of any value," "You will never amount to anything."'
'I say the same cruel things to people in chatrooms, but with toxic language too. I would call people c***s and tell people to f**k off.
'I was repeatedly bounced out of chatrooms for my hateful behavior because I would just unload everything on these strangers.'
Landon's net addiction went hand in hand with alcoholism, which she battled for more than 30 years and resulted in her losing her house.
She said each night she would gorge on a large pizza washed down with two tall cans of beer as well as several rum and cokes and margaritas.
Her tirades would last five hours every day after work and on weekends, she would barely leave her basement at all.
In 2007, she finally realized she was 'worn out' so she began attending AA meetings and undergoing psychotherapy in a bid to escape her vices and has been sober for over a decade, admitting she's in a much happier place but revealed her trolling days haunt her.
Landon, who has fibromyalgia, which causes chronic pain and fatigue said: 'My family was monstrously abusive and it almost destroyed me. It was horrible. I never felt safe, I never felt good enough.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/a...nt-abusive-messages-strangers-five-years.html
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