Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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This man is a walking fashion abomination. White socks, pant crotch riding his balls while four inches off his shoes and the world's most unfitted suit jacket.

Even mayo ghouls of the Wasteland know how to dress for church, manchild.
 
I'm more bemused he thinks the grant money in question is coming from a tax raise that hasn't and will not happen, since Trump, in fact CUT taxes.
I mean, Bob can barely pay attention to vidya, comics and Dragon Ball Z, so it makes perfect sense that he doesn't understand how this recovery plan will work. His thought process is literally: "Trump bad! TRUMP BAD! BOB SMASH!"
 
I mean, Bob can barely pay attention to vidya, comics and Dragon Ball Z, so it makes perfect sense that he doesn't understand how this recovery plan will work. His thought process is literally: "Trump bad! TRUMP BAD! BOB SMASH!"
Does Bob even have an attention span, or anything human for that matter?
 
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What's most astonishing about this (and this is hardly the first time this has happened; I sometimes wonder if Bob has macros for his reactions to these kinds of stories) is that stories like this are quite clearly part of a media campaign to weaken support for Trump. I'm not going to scream "Fake news!" but generally these things are cherry picked as part of a larger effort to make it look like Trump's supporters are about to abandon him, and to show sympathy for them; to let them know it's okay to vote against him next time.

And Bob doesn't get it. His hatred is so visceral, so absolute, that he's compelled to show his disgust in the most obnoxious terms possible. The people on this thread who've mused whether Bob might actually do violence to a Trump voter if he had the opportunity ... yeah, I see it.
 
So, I have a friend who is vaguely aware of Bobert's raving lunacy, but not as closely as we here are. So, today we're cracking jokes at Bob's expense, when suddenly my friend asks "Suppose Bob got his wish and every midwest farmer in America disappeared. Where would Bob get his food from?"

My eyes widened and I just looked at him, and in the most serious tone I could manage, I reply "Oh, right. You don't know about the Moon Wheat."

My friend just looks at me like I'M the retarded one.

I then spent the next few minutes sharing with him Bob's plan to terraform the moon to grow wheat.
 
I'm more bemused he thinks the grant money in question is coming from a tax raise that hasn't and will not happen, since Trump, in fact CUT taxes.

Bob makes $4k/mo on Patreon, plus ad revenue and whatever financial pity-fucks get tossed his way for his "work." Just using the 4k/mo figure, that's still $48,000/yr- and he's self-employed. That puts him well in the taxable range for federal, plus effective penalties for self-employment. The Trump tax plan will cut his taxes, and while it did poison pill high-tax blue states by capping state and local tax deductions at $10,000, but I don't think MA's income tax rate is high enough that this will matter to Bob. You need to be making >=6 figures to feel that one, IIRC.

You know, despite getting to live in his brother's basement, I'd be inclined to sympathize slightly with his predicament: self-employed, with multiple small revenue streams in an expensive state and Patreon (presumably his single largest income source) presumably not doing withholding or other tax conveniences. Anyone in that situation's going to have to be smart, conservative with his spending, and keep meticulous records to avoid having tax season absolutely violate you. I would feel sympathetic, but... this is Bob. So I'm just going to imagine him Trigglypuffing in front of his copy of TurboTax and chuckle.
 
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Nice socks you pear-shaped faggot. Have you ever worn a suit before?
Good lord, white cotton socks with a dark navy suit? It’s also horribly tailored, the suit looks like someone draped a bag over him.

When I bought my wedding suit, I went to a designer boutique and the seamstress was this hilarious Russian lady. She told me a story about a fat dude asking for a suit that would make him look good. She goes “I’m sorry but that’s impossible”.

There’s very little you can do to a suit that would make someone like Bob look good in it.
 
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There’s very little you can do to a suit that would make someone like Bob look good in it.

You can iron it and have the right inseam length. And have the tie tied by someone with fingers other than thumbs. Granted, none of this will actually make Bob look good, but there's so much low-hanging fruit here when it comes to making him look less bad.
 
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Might be spergy of me, but I have to say that if this example of sympathy is how Bob reacts to Republican farmers on the other side of the country? I am genuinely scared for his niece if she turns Republican when she gets older. Like, I honestly do believe Bob will try and either indoctrinate her to the Left or will try and get her kicked out of the house.
 
You can iron it and have the right inseam length. And have the tie tied by someone with fingers other than thumbs. Granted, none of this will actually make Bob look good, but there's so much low-hanging fruit here when it comes to making him look less bad.

From the looks of it, it's probably a rented tux. The rental shop could put a tuck in here and there, but there's only so much they could do without permanently damaging the thing. This would explain why it looks like Bob's wearing flood pants; the rental shop didn't have a pair long enough for him. It would also explain why the jacket bottom looks too big for him - His chest is disproportionately big and the rest of it hangs down over his torso like a skirt. He either didn't notice the extra fabric here or he didn't get the tux in time to have it altered.

Chris, I have to say , looks much better than Bob, but them again, he doesn't have a body that looks like an upside-down egg balanced on a couple of pretzel sticks.
 
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