DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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We might be seeing white LTG before the year is out quite frankly, demanding minimum "interaction" before he even starts playing the game.
Isn’t he already doing that though with the hours of prestreams? I know he’s not specifically waiting to be paid before he starts, but he pretty much is as you know he’ll make his fans feel like assholes if they don’t make effusive gestures of encomium.

Phil was boring the hell out of me for awhile, but when you get to watch him give away the microscopic pieces he has left of his dignity man that sucks me right back in.
This is surely the joy of our incomparable pigroach. A steaming pantload of a human being trying to live the dream but only getting destroyed by his own hubris. It’s a masterpiece of schadenfreude, if a little :autism:, and always hooks you right back in just when you think things have gotten dull.
 
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This is panic, pure panic. If I ever open a dictionary to look up the word "panic" I might encounter this picture. Doesn't matter where you stop the emergency video, it's all genuine panic. So, in this desperate situation, what will he do? What would a desperate person like him, who depends on each single Cent do? Let me think. Of course! Eliminate the practically free money source of Youtube because sitting on his ass and watch the upload (literally doing nothing) and only receiving $10 per day isn't worth it. The money which comes in while doing nothing. Who needs extra $300 per month anyway?

This is a guy sitting in a deep ugly well in the middle of nowhere and there comes a poor kid along who tosses him a slice of bread down there out of pure compassion. And he complaints this will not help him out of the well and throws the food in the muddy water he stands in. Listen poor kid, if he has to stay in this well for longer and if you really enjoy the laugh you get by seeing this poor soul dying in the infested brown water, you have to step up and get a job. Or a second one. Then gently lower him down a good high quality burger on a rope (which he could use to escape but won't) and also a nice Coke, oh fuck it, lower him down some expensive art and figurines.
 
Genuinely thought I was reading quotes from some goofy detractor parody video when I heard he was "laying down the law" to the Youtube audience who are yet to dip their hands in their pockets for his content. The absolute nerve of the man, calling his fans freeloaders unless they're actively paying him to sit on his ass and bitch and complain about video games and how shit his life is. If this isnt the straw that broke the camels back for those fans who are somewhat critical of his behaviour, then nothing will change them. He should be grateful for every single fucking view he gets on his shit tier, bottom of the barrel "content", not guilt tripping and threatening his ever dwindling audience. Pure narcissism.
 
This Ask The King was so bad. This man has no skill for damage control. He would double down with 20 in blackjack. He even said that Diction and the other guy didn't deserve their following and were just flashes in the pan. Good lord lol. Maybe he has forgotten already that it's against Twitch TOS to shit on other streamers, no matter where you do it. Phil is the most common factor here.

One question: Phil you have such a large vocabulary, you must read a lot
Phil: I read a lot of comic books and comic books have some of the biggest vocabularies anywhere. I also took british literature classes in college that taught me a lot of obscure words and stuff. Ummm, so yeah, in regards to the common person in the United States I probably have a far more descriptive vocabulary and a lot more versatile in words i can use in conversation

:story:
 
Isnt it againts twitch tos to ask for tips for services? I probably just reaching but he says if he does not get patreon support or tips, he will not upload videos to youtube. Or is it only for unbanning or mod status or sthing?
Its against TOS to shit talk other streamers and guess what he just did!
 
So what were you all up today? I had a good time cutting of Phil's head. Not literally. Hard to cut around his hair with his shitty camera quality, shitty lighting and black foam in the background. Just later realized how they tell a story from left to right: Uuuh, wait a minute, the ad revenue is gone!

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Higher Resolution, Transparent Background:
https://i.imgur.com/FOWOG8E.png
(Edit) Alternative Link: https://imgur.com/a/7w5mRtn
Feel free to use.
 
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Hahahaha holy shit, he seriously made another Emergency : i die video?

I was beginning to miss those. I always wanted him to explain his life story of BACK WHEN I STARTED ON YOUTUBE for the 300th time

So what were you all up today? I had a good time cutting of Phil's head. Not literally. Hard to cut around his hair with his shitty camera quality, shitty lighting and black foam in the background. Just later realized how they tell a story from left to right: Uuuh, wait a minute, the ad revenue is gone!

View attachment 505797

Higher Resolution, Transparent Background:
https://i.imgur.com/FOWOG8E.png
Feel free to use.

I'm sure those will serve just fine on his quality fan-art that his fans will make. There's never not enough of his stupid face on every character on screen
 
So what were you all up today? I had a good time cutting of Phil's head. Not literally. Hard to cut around his hair with his shitty camera quality, shitty lighting and black foam in the background. Just later realized how they tell a story from left to right: Uuuh, wait a minute, the ad revenue is gone!

View attachment 505797

Higher Resolution, Transparent Background:
https://i.imgur.com/FOWOG8E.png
Feel free to use.
new emoji for kiwi farms
 
Genuinely thought I was reading quotes from some goofy detractor parody video when I heard he was "laying down the law" to the Youtube audience who are yet to dip their hands in their pockets for his content. The absolute nerve of the man, calling his fans freeloaders unless they're actively paying him to sit on his ass and bitch and complain about video games and how shit his life is. If this isnt the straw that broke the camels back for those fans who are somewhat critical of his behaviour, then nothing will change them. He should be grateful for every single fucking view he gets on his shit tier, bottom of the barrel "content", not guilt tripping and threatening his ever dwindling audience. Pure narcissism.
His sense of entitlement is out of this world, he actually has the gall to imply that youtube/google or his audience owe him jack or shit, let alone some kind of living wage. HE is the one that put himself in the position of living the peter pan-esque fantasy job of a snot nosed immature 13 yo that any idiot with two brain cells to rub together would know provides a very unstable and unsustainable source of income. Which reminds me, he actually said in his "laying down the law" prestream that he's one of few oldest streamers around, gee doesn't that tell you something Phil? Most people around your age that did that "job" saw the writing on the wall and got the hell out of dodge while the going was good or on the decline.

He's actually the only lolcow that I feel an actual disdain and disgust towards.
 
So what were you all up today? I had a good time cutting of Phil's head. Not literally. Hard to cut around his hair with his shitty camera quality, shitty lighting and black foam in the background. Just later realized how they tell a story from left to right: Uuuh, wait a minute, the ad revenue is gone!

View attachment 505797

Higher Resolution, Transparent Background:
https://i.imgur.com/FOWOG8E.png
Feel free to use.
I cant open it says it has an error.

EDIT: Worked in EDGE :D
 
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  • Informative
Reactions: Lysol
Hello! Phil here. Ladies and gentlemen, as you know, *snort* I am in dire straights right now. My YouTube channel *belch*, YouTube daht cahm forward slash DSPgaming, has been demonetized because of those book-smart stupid idiots at YouTube and Google. These morahns are desperately trying to ruin my life and take my big, beautiful, full-time, grown-up, mature house away from me! Ree! They have been trying for years! But I have a way we can stop them. That’s right, ladies and gentemen, you and I can stop YouTube and Google from taking this house I have worked my ass off for last tin years. All you need to do is go to my pay-tree-inn page, pay-tree-inn daht cahm forward slash darksydephil, and become a patron. If we reach my goal of $4,150 dollars this month, I will upload all of my archived streams for the month onto my YouTube page, YouTube daht cahm forward slash KOgaming. But make sure when you watch the videos at KOgaming that you click on the ads that way I can make more money.

I really do feel like this is the implosion I’ve been patiently waiting on for the past 2 years. I think from here on out we will see a metamorphosis of Phil into something far more bitter and angrier than anyone could possibly have imagined.

This is going to be an exciting second half of the year for this show. Episodes I’m looking forward to:
  • DSP Tries It: Foreclosure
  • DSP Tries It: Bankruptcy
  • DSP Tries It: Moving Back to CT
One final observation, during the live stream he said he “might have to find other avenues,” back-alley blowjobs confirmed?
  • DSP Tries It: Deepthroat
 
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You might encounter that picture if you look up "fraud" too. Or the face a pedo makes when he's busted by Chris Hanson.

No man, this time it's real. The stars finally aligned, pigs fly over his house, the hell is frozen over. Now it's the time to get the job he worked so hard for, I believe in him, he can do it. We just have to believe super hard in his abilities and the pressure of this dire situation he's in. If he really puts all his energy together and focuses it right where it belongs, he can make the jump. He can finally lay his career as a videogamer to the side, step up, walk out the entrance and shout to the world:
Finally, I'm a homeless hobo!

I cant open it says it has an error.

EDIT: Worked in EDGE :biggrin:

I put in an alternative link, just in case :)

i love how he blatantly said "This is not like the other times I over exaggerated, this is real" Wow, Phil way to admit you were fucking lying to make extra money.

What, Phil lied to make money? This comes as a real surprise. Man, why hasn't somebody called him out on this, like each time he made an emergency stream, here on the Kiwis? And all this time I thought: Wait a minute, this isn't Phil, he would never lie to the audience, something might be wrong here. Oh man, at least he hasn't bought a new car recently.
(:_(

This session of the DSP-show is fucking amazing.
 
Hello! Phil here. Ladies and gentlemen, as you know, *snort* I am in dire straights right now. My YouTube channel *belch*, YouTube daht cahm forward slash DSPgaming, has been demonetized because of those book-smart stupid idiots at YouTube and Google. These morahns are desperately trying to ruin my life and take my big, beautiful, full-time, grown-up, mature house away from me! Ree! They have been trying for years! But I have a way we can stop them. That’s right, ladies and gentemen, you and I can stop YouTube and Google from taking this house I have worked my ass off for last tin years. All you need to do is go to my pay-tree-inn page, pay-tree-inn daht cahm forward slash darksydephil, and become a patron. If we reach my goal of $4,150 dollars this month, I will upload all of my archived streams for the month onto my YouTube page, YouTube daht cahm forward slash KOgaming. But make sure when you watch the videos at KOgaming that you click on the ads that way I can make more money.

I really do feel like this is the implosion I’ve been patiently waiting on for the past 2 years. I think from here on out we will see a metamorphosis of Phil into something far more bitter and angrier than anyone could possibly have imagined.

This is going to be an exciting second half of the year for this show. Episodes I’m looking forward to:
  • DSP Tries It: Foreclosure
  • DSP Tries It: Bankruptcy
  • DSP Tries It: Moving Back to CT
One final observation, during the live stream he said he “might have to find other avenues,” back-alley blowjobs confirmed?
  • DSP Tries It: Deepthroat
He'd sooner try to pimp out Kat than get his fat lazy ass off the couch and stop virtual panhandling and get another "job".
 
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The begging has arrived.

The slimiest video he's put out in a while. Since the Leanna hospital escapades? The OPseat clarification video? None of Dave's projected "drastic measures" or future options include a j-o-b or selling any of his empty frivolities, I see. Also holy shit, he wants to triple the Patreon income.

Edit: in his begging video Phil says "is it worth babysitting the videos, putting them in play lists, tweeting out when they're live for $10 a day??" that's probably what his patreons make an hour and he can't spend the 5 minutes for $10 a day, especially since he is uploading in chunks now
Note babysitting the uploads is suddenly hard work again.

If she really loves him she'd stay.
Fuck that. Why stick around with some deadbeat? If he's not going to be stop being oblivious for the bare minimum, long enough to repair the gravy train, it's not worth.
 
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  • Agree
Reactions: Adamska and Lysol
i love how he blatantly said "This is not like the other times I over exaggerated, this is real" Wow, Phil way to admit you were fucking lying to make extra money.

Dave probably have the guiness record of most freudian slips within a minute. I hope we one day we see a Top 10 of those quotes because some of the most damning shit he has said also seemed to be accidental on his part.

I'm also surprised this line didn't make the community explode with videos about it. I think if you put all the runtime of the videos relating to the Machinima/Youtube saga and everytime he talked about his taxes on pre-streams and vLogs the count goes past the 12 hour mark for each saga. Ironically, it does sound like he was overexaggerating but it also makes me dread and curious as to what a REAL EMERGENCY means in the DSPhere.

Fuck that. Why stick around with some deadbeat? If he's not going to be stop being oblivious for the bare minimum, long enough to repair the gravy train, it's not worth.

I'm pretty sure he is not a deadbeat and i'm also sure Kat has things to do that do not involve the Internet, same went for Panda, she eventually found other people things to do that kept her mind away from the pigroach. Hell, i wouldn't be surprised if the total amount of interaction in the entire day doesn't go over the hour mark
 
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