Money Financhu Crisis / Chris sells his stuff megathread

[Mariposa Electrique]

For an unknown reason, Chris only thinks about right now this instant.

This isn't a medical mystery TV show, we know why Chris needs to be in a group home already.

Bronycon being cancelled will be the best thing to happen for Chris financially since the tugboat. I doubt he spends that much at the other cons. Ponies are his heroin.

Right, because with Bronycon being canceled, Chris can stop spending copious amounts of money on toys, take care of responsibilities, and beat Trump in the 2020 presidential race. There are other cons and toys that will grab Chris' attention, which he will squander copious amounts of money on.

 

[Kuchipatchi]

Bronycon being cancelled will be the best thing to happen for Chris financially since the tugboat. I doubt he spends that much at the other cons. Ponies are his heroin.

Could be. There are other cons he goes to but how much on average does he spend on those?
Plus, he has access to online shops and commissioners so there's not much detering him from spending hundreds on eBay or whatever toy shop for a Pony fix.

 

[An Ghost]

Are you answering for yourself or for @The Captain? Because you said you gave Chris the $100 he needed for towing.

Was a joke to make tards who get mad about giving money to Chris angry. Literally the next posts are the captain saying “no” and me saying “Laughing out Loud!”

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

As dumb as the bronycon spending was, I can almost give it a pass as its a once a year thing that's pretty much designed to part money from adult children.

I usually agree with you Mason, but on this, I do not. This isn't just a once a year thing. We have seen his home, it's cluttered with unnecessary toys and video games. It's not just a temporary lapse in Vegas where you get drunk and lose all your money to a hooker or gambling. Chris will do this over and over again, making other people rich while he complains about "stwess", "biwwss", but especially "TOYS".

 

[Mason Verger]

which I intended to take to my local coin gallery and exchange for melt value (roughly $500

ALOL give me their number please, I'm looking for a place that will pay 4x the melt value on a 10k gold alloy class ring. I promise not to tell them that the standered melt value is around $130 on a good day.

Just admit you wanted a piece of christorical history and not as some savvy business deal between you and the worst gold appraisers in the country.

I usually agree with you Mason, but on this, I do not. This isn't just a once a year thing. We have seen his home, it's cluttered with unnecessary toys and video games. It's not just a temporary lapse in Vegas where you get drunk and lose all your money to a hooker or gambling. Chris will do this over and over again, making other people rich while he complains about "stwess", "biwwss", but especially "TOYS".

I did say "almost give him a pass" haha. I mainly mean that I'm not surprised in the slightest that he would spend nearly every dollar there, I'd be surprised if he didn't. Bronycon was basically an expected loss. Commissioning art on top of that was the extra stupid part, if anything because it would've limited the amount of pony merch he could buy. It's like his instant gratification got the better of his "slightly in the future" gratification.

 

[The Giver]

Remember when you were a kid? Your parents took you to that store you loved so that you could spend all your birthday money? You had no concept of saving it, beyond maybe having heard adults talk about saving money. But not really to you, because you were too immature to really be expected to think about that sort of thing. They were taking you to that store so that you could have a shopping spree with the money those nice adults had given you. To be honest, you probably weren't even all that aware of how adults got money, beyond maybe seeing firemen, policemen, and lawyers on the shows the adults watched, and maybe some passing mentions on your favorite cartoons.

That is how Chris looked at the Cherry donation. It was birthday money, and he was a kid, and Bronycon was his favorite store. If Bronycon hadn't been just around the corner, it would have been ebay/amazon/whatever. He went into Bronycon thinking of that donation as the birthday money he had to spend on toys, just like when you were a kid at BestBuy frantically figuring up how many games you could afford.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

Boy, I was wrong.

Biggest understatement I have ever seen in Christory.

 

[The Captain]

ALOL give me their number please, I'm looking for a place that will pay 4x the melt value on a 10k gold alloy class ring. I promise not to tell them that the standered melt value is around $130 on a good day.

I thought it to be a bit higher than that - I was basing it off of the fact I thought the ring was 14k. I just checked the Cwciki and it looks like someone looked up the make/manufacturer of the ring and sure enough - HK/Ult = 10k. But yeah, at 10k it's right at about $200 based on its weight and gold spot today so at best I would've broken even. But hey, it was central to busting the Ideafags so win/win.

I did get a couple extras with it - he drew me a full page color comic of himself and the specials draining the ring of its power and giving it to me for "safekeeping". He also threw in a rainbow fidget cube that I didn't ask for nor want. The ring came with some weird faux leather rope, as if it were intended to be worn around the neck. I asked for the comic to be included with the price of the ring - but I didn't ask for the cube. When I returned the ring I offered to send both the comic, ring and cube back, and he replied, "You can keep the drawing, duh!" It was an odd response, but a nice gesture on his part. The drawing itself is actually quite nice and you can tell he spent a decent amount of time working on it and didn't rush. He actually laminated the certificate - I'm not sure if he has a laminator or is having it done somewhere.

Maybe I'll scan the comic and censor my name or whatever so you guys can see.

 

[Mason Verger]

I thought it to be a bit higher than that - I was basing it off of the fact I thought the ring was 14k. I just checked the Cwciki and it looks like someone looked up the make/manufacturer of the ring and sure enough - HK/Ult = 10k. But yeah, at 10k it's right at about $200 based on its weight so at best I would've broken even. But hey, it was central to busting the Ideafags so win/win.

I did get a couple extras with it - he drew me a full page color comic of himself and the specials draining the ring of its power and giving it to me for "safekeeping". He also threw in a rainbow fidget cube that I didn't ask for nor want. The ring came with some weird faux leather rope, as if it were intended to be worn around the neck. I asked for the comic to be included with the price of the ring - but I didn't ask for the cube. When I returned the ring I offered to send both the comicm ring and cube back, and he replied, "You can keep the drawing, duh!" It was an odd response, but a nice gesture on his part. The drawing itself is actually quite nice and you can tell he spent a decent amount of time working on it and didn't rush. He actually laminated the certificate - I'm not sure if he has a laminator or is having it done somewhere.

Maybe I'll scan the comic and censor my name or whatever so you guys can see.

See now that I can get behind because its actual content. Believe it or not, most of us arent here to watch chris behave himself. I can only imagine how interesting it wouldve been for chris to be stranded at a gas ststion overnight due to his own self gratification.

I don't mean to break your balls on this shit, I just think you need to release your grip on the moral high ground and join us down in the gutter. I assure you it's way more fun.

 

[The Captain]

I don't mean to break your balls on this shit, I just think you need to release your grip on the moral high ground and join us down in the gutter. I assure you it's way more fun.

I've only been taking the high ground when I felt it was necessary. As far as the current finances go, that's all on him to unfuck.

Oh and as promised:


The first warning sign that something was "off" about this transaction was the fact that nobody was smiling in the comic. All of the Sonichus are sad that he's giving the ring away, which in itself is indicative that Chris wasn't making any of these sales of his own free will.

It turns out that Wise and Boyd were telling him what to sell/urging him to dig through more boxes, etc. in an effort to find things to hawk on eBay to make money for them.

 

[Mason Verger]

I've only been taking the high ground when I felt it was necessary. As far as the current finances go, that's all on him to unfuck.

Oh and as promised:

View attachment 522825
The first warning sign that something was "off" about this transaction was the fact that nobody was smiling in the comic. All of the Sonichus are sad that he's giving the ring away, which in itself is indicative that Chris wasn't making any of these sales of his own free will.

It turns out that Wise and Boyd were telling him what to sell/urging him to dig through more boxes, etc. in an effort to find things to hawk on eBay to make money for them.

Now that's funny. He had to absorb all but 0.01 percent of the power out of it before he gave it to you, and let you know that he did so. Like the powers weren't part of the transaction.

He's like Daniel Plainview in his business dealings, he drank all the milkshake.

 

[The Captain]

Now that's funny. He had to absorb all but 0.01 percent of the power out of it before he gave it to you, and let you know that he did so. Like the powers weren't part of the transaction.

He's like Daniel Plainview in his business dealings, he drank all the milkshake.

And that 0.01 was how I convinced him I was receiving coded signals when the ring was near my Xbox One X - it was a shot in the dark and worked.

 

[Mason Verger]

And that 0.01 was how I convinced him I was receiving coded signals when the ring was near my Xbox One X - it was a shot in the dark and worked.

So.. uhhh.. Chris has your dox, huh? Yikes..

You know he's kinda prone to calling people out when they displease him.

 

[The Captain]

So.. uhhh.. Chris has your dox, huh? Yikes..

You know he's kinda prone to calling people out when they displease him.

He's got tons and tons - people order things from him all the time. Even Null bought an iPhone from him and provided his actual mailing address (well, what it was at the time).

That's actually why I have a ton of respect for Null - he filed the FBI report with all of his own information, phone number, etc.

All of my texting/calling with Chris is done through Google Voice.

 

[Emet-Selch]

I've only been taking the high ground when I felt it was necessary. As far as the current finances go, that's all on him to unfuck.

Oh and as promised:

View attachment 522825
The first warning sign that something was "off" about this transaction was the fact that nobody was smiling in the comic. All of the Sonichus are sad that he's giving the ring away, which in itself is indicative that Chris wasn't making any of these sales of his own free will.

It turns out that Wise and Boyd were telling him what to sell/urging him to dig through more boxes, etc. in an effort to find things to hawk on eBay to make money for them.

Thank you so much for sharing this. I don't know why, but this little tidbit of Chris artistry screams oldschool Chris to me. I don't know if it is because the subject is the ring, or just seeing all the little Sonichus lined up, but this put a huge ol' smile on me. So fucking funny.

EDIT: Just now saw that he fucking put a little arrow next to himself to indicate it's him. A cherry on top of the Chris-Cake.

 

[Done]

I love that Chris drew himself in the Cheeki Breeki costume.

The first warning sign that something was "off" about this transaction was the fact that nobody was smiling in the comic. All of the Sonichus are sad that he's giving the ring away, which in itself is indicative that Chris wasn't making any of these sales of his own free will.

This detail is kinda funny, Chris treated selling his largely worthless ring like he was a parent forced to sell his kid's toys to pay the bills.

The circumstances certainly sucked ass, but leave it to Chris to provide hilarity in the darkest of situations.

He's like Daniel Plainview in his business dealings, he drank all the milkshake.

This got me laughing so much. And it really described Chris's mentality to a tee.

 

[Francine StripeCheer]

more begging

 

[Kosher Dill]

View attachment 522825

I love how your comic self is so huge compared to everyone else I think we've stumbled into an issue of Stardust The Super Wizard.

(Note the hand too XD)

 

[No_one]

Chris should just become Barb's pimp to get steady income.

 

[Pvt. Real G]

more begging

Wait, so what is the truth of the finachu crisis? Chris is broke, as can confirmed by various sources. But is Barb broke as well, or just wants to use Chris to haul in more pity bucks? Doesn't Barb have a reverse mortgage on the house that guarantees her a monthly allowance, along with her social security and money she takes from Chris's tugboat. That's quite a bit, for an old woman to spend all in just half a month.