Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[RomanesEuntDomus]

What if The Force Awakens was hyped and hyped and hyped, and without kind of notice, they swerved us by having the opening crawl start off with "Episode X" instead of VII?

TFA could be called Episode Six-point-oh-one or Episode Tenthousand, it would change literally nothing about how disconnected it is from the rest of the plot. The moment the title crawl tells us that there's a timeskip between ROTJ and TFA, we know everything that calling it Episode X would imply. Time passed, things are different, no connection or transition is given.
No matter what you call the episode, the viewer expects continuity between movies, lampshading a lack thereof doesn't make that suddenly okay.

To @RomanesEuntDomus, that's what I say about the prequels. "Sure, they were stupid, the acting is bad, and some of the CG clashes, but hey, I enjoy them because of that. It adds that B movie charm I want from Star Wars," is my defense of the prequels. They're fun to laugh at.

There is absolutely no reason not to enjoy certain movies as guilty pleasure. I, too, enjoy a lot of admittedly crappy stuff, but I sometimes like the idea even if the execution is subpar. Or I enjoy it for the great memories that I made when watching/experiencing it with friends for the first time.

In that regard, the prequels are great. They have many memorable scenes and characters. Some good, some bad, some atrocious. It's a clusterfuck at times, but damnit, you can genuinely enjoy them. If only to laugh at the awkward dialogue.

Imagine the chaos going on at Disney-Lucasfilm. All that delicious office drama we'll never get to see...

We're going to hear about it. This drama will eventually become public, but it'll take some time.

Well, here's hoping Episode IX does okay.

Certainly not. I hope it'll bomb with such a magnificent, fluorescent, radiating clarity that everyone who greenlighted this trainwreck of a trilogy will forever be haunted by their own shadows, dancing in the light of utter failure.

 

[Elwood P. Dowd]

ReyLo isn't a redemption arc. It's a Harlequin Romance. The imgur album or whatever it is, is beyond exceptional.

https://imgur.com/a/QUbyYog

"JJ will never make Reylo canon!" JJ on TFA "You're probably going to have a castle, a prince and princess in a fairytale..."

All hail JJ, the almighty father of Reylo. Hahah!

But seriously. It’s impossible to deny that this is what they were going for—especially after JJ’s commentary. At this point, people who deny that there is something very deep and romantic transpiring between Rey and Ben are simply denying it because they don’t want it to happen. They are ignoring basic romantic tropes, visual and emotional cues, body language, important cinematic parallels, director commentary, statements made my actors...the list goes on and on.

Not sure how many Disney princes murdered their father, slaughtered an innocent old guy then his entire village, said yeah whatever when somebody on his side blew up six or so planets, etc. But Beauty and the Beast gifs! Take that, h8r.

/r/StarWarsCantina is certainly an interesting place. For those who don't know, it was created as a safe space for Star Wars fans who think the main Star Wars sub is too mean and negative.

 

[Flexo]

ReyLo isn't a redemption arc. It's a Harlequin Romance. The imgur album or whatever it is, is beyond exceptional.

https://imgur.com/a/QUbyYog

"JJ will never make Reylo canon!" JJ on TFA "You're probably going to have a castle, a prince and princess in a fairytale..."



Not sure how many Disney princes murdered their father, slaughtered an innocent old guy then his entire village, said yeah whatever when somebody on his side blew up six or so planets, etc. But Beauty and the Beast gifs! Take that, h8r.

/r/StarWarsCantina is certainly an interesting place. For those who don't know, it was created as a safe space for Star Wars fans who think the main Star Wars sub is too mean and negative.

Any time someone wants to disprove the claim "women dig psychopathic jerks," along comes another 50 shades...

Do it, Disney. Just straight up make EpIX "50 shades of Force" just so I can watch the expressions of those trying to defend it.

 

[Creep3r]

I think I'm gonna be ill.

 

[Your Weird Fetish]

ReyLo isn't a redemption arc. It's a Harlequin Romance. The imgur album or whatever it is, is beyond exceptional.

I gotta admit, the Plinkett review has me thinking that if Rian chose to subvert our expectations by ending where Plinkett recommended then the next film had Darth Mary Sue paired up with Kylo as the villain it could actually work with competent writing.

 

[Elwood P. Dowd]

I think I'm gonna be ill.

Somebody had to sit down and make that. I think they even included the massacre scene, about 1:29. So romantic.

 

[Zaryiu]

I gotta admit, the Plinkett review has me thinking that if Rian chose to subvert our expectations by ending where Plinkett recommended then the next film had Darth Mary Sue paired up with Kylo as the villain it could actually work with competent writing.

So we'd be fucked

 

[SuperSheep]

I gotta admit, the Plinkett review has me thinking that if Rian chose to subvert our expectations by ending where Plinkett recommended then the next film had Darth Mary Sue paired up with Kylo as the villain it could actually work with competent writing.

I would only accept this idea if the next movie shows their attempts to bring a new order ends in spectacular bloody failure because every time some asshole gets it in their head that they can fix the galaxy by embracing the Dark Side, it only ends in totalitarianism and planets' worth of corpses. Except worse because Kylo Ren is an impulsive shithead with the charisma and manipulation skills of a rabid dog on crack made from Satan's ejaculation. And given his newly established contempt for the past, he'll fail in the lessons that allowed past Dark Siders to take over without firing a shot and instead have to rely on even more brute force methods.

 

[vhstape]

the review caused such a shitshow on resetera they closed it down
https://www.resetera.com/threads/red-letter-media-star-wars-the-last-plinkett-review.64851/page-37

 

[Intelligent Calcium]

https://archive.is/Ohp5X
https://archive.is/RraA8

 

[mrdk_04]

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Is he serious? What kind of "internet tough guy" attitude is this?
He's deleted it, but to see a grown man resort to these kinds of responses is laughable.

 

[TerminalTryHard]

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He should show his dad more respect.

 

[BrunoMattei]

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Yeah fucking right you faggot, you fucking fear being made fun of by Plinkett and you fucking know it.

Is he serious? What kind of "internet tough guy" attitude is this?
He's deleted it, but to see a grown man resort to these kinds of responses is laughable.

He could have ignored it too. Or just say something to the effect of "To each his own. Everyone is free to like or dislike something." Instead he acts like a faggot about it.

 

[Flexo]

the review caused such a shitshow on resetera they closed it down
https://www.resetera.com/threads/red-letter-media-star-wars-the-last-plinkett-review.64851/page-37

What the hell is that place?

He could have ignored it too. Or just say something to the effect of "To each his own. Everyone is free to like or dislike something." Instead he acts like a faggot about it.

I'll admit, if he embraced it and ran with the joke (something like "Maybe I would have made a better movie if you loved me, Dad!") I would have gained a ton more respect for the guy. Even given him a toast. But no, he's got to be a little bitch...

And I'll admit that I actually enjoyed Looper (it's like the best Philip K. Dick movie ever).

 

[Chester Rigby]

Imagine the chaos going on at Disney-Lucasfilm. All that delicious office drama we'll never get to see...

You've hit a sensitive spot there.

That's the most painful aspect for me: we're not hearing not even a fraction of all the fights, the remorse, the reproaches, etc. going on at Disney's HQ right now

 

[Antipathy]

You've hit a sensitive spot there.

That's the most painful aspect for me: we're not hearing not even a fraction of all the fights, the remorse, the reproaches, etc. going on at Disney's HQ right now

It's probably more of a silent, overbearing dread that suffuses everywhere in the upper echelons. Their method isn't working and they don't know why.

 

[Sumdood]

Jesus crust that resetera thread is a disaster. Alt-right this, sexism that, sexist alt-rightism everywhere (apparently). Is everyone on the internet 14?

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

Is he serious? What kind of "internet tough guy" attitude is this?
He's deleted it, but to see a grown man resort to these kinds of responses is laughable.

Well, it's not like he's a creative writer, right?

Yeah fucking right you faggot, you fucking fear being made fun of by Plinkett and you fucking know it.
He could have ignored it too. Or just say something to the effect of "To each his own. Everyone is free to like or dislike something." Instead he acts like a faggot about it.

Ruin Johnson: "I want my movies to be divisive, if some people absolutely love it and some hate it, that's a good thing."
Also Ruin Johnson: *just being salty towards people who have voiced negative opinions about his movie*

 

[Antipathy]

I would only accept this idea if the next movie shows their attempts to bring a new order ends in spectacular bloody failure because every time some asshole gets it in their head that they can fix the galaxy by embracing the Dark Side, it only ends in totalitarianism and planets' worth of corpses. Except worse because Kylo Ren is an impulsive shithead with the charisma and manipulation skills of a rabid dog on crack made from Satan's ejaculation. And given his newly established contempt for the past, he'll fail in the lessons that allowed past Dark Siders to take over without firing a shot and instead have to rely on even more brute force methods.

It's a lot like communism, or fascism, or any sort of extremism. It's always "we'll be different this time! Everything will go as planned! I can save you all!" And before long, it's just another totalitarian dystopia covered in corpses and skulls. The Dark Side is, was, and always will be an embodiment of rash decisions, extremism, impatience, and impulsiveness. That's why it's so addicting, because the Dark Side grants immediate results. Yoda flat out said this in Empire, that the "quick and easy path" is the path to the Dark Side.

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

That's why it's so addicting, because the Dark Side grants immediate results. Yoda flat out said this in Empire, that the "quick and easy path" is the path to the Dark Side.

One thing to keep in mind is that the whole broo-haha about the dark side of the force and how unchecked bad emotions lead to suffering and how important it is to keep your cool, to do what's right even if that means doing detours and accepting slow progress... yeah, that's pretty good morals to actually live by. It makes sense. Everyone can relate to it.
How often do you end up in a situation where you are tempted to be rash and irresponsible just to get your desired result more quickly?
All these things about Jedi and Sith might not be super deep or applicable to everything, but they are very basic and good morals at their core.
Some people have been inspired by these values to strive to be better people, even.

What has Abrams or Johnson given us? Jack shit, that's what.
Again, for all their faults, the prequels tried to give us a believable descend from someone who wants to be a good person, who then falls to the dark side. Lucas tried to give us some ambiguity and make us relate to Anakin and his frustration and wrath, to make us understand why he went to the dark side.

What sort of morals do the sequels give us?
Luke, who used to be optimistic and full of hope has become a cynic who (even just for a short moment) wanted to kill a helpless, sleeping apprentice for no fucking reason. It doesn't even matter that it was just a spur of the moment that he overcame instantly.
What other morals are there? How about Poe's "Never question your superiors and do as you are ordered"?
Rey is the protagonist and she doesn't offer a single fucking thing in terms of morals. She just faces Sonichu-tier obstacles that she overcomes within seconds of bumping into them.