Secret Gamer Girl / SecretGamerGrrl / Googleshng / "Violet Hargrave" / Jacob Lawrence (Jake) Alley / Violet Cassandra Ocean - Delusional Zoe Quinn Stalker, Libelous Tweeter, Thirsty Gnome, Faux-Tranny Neckbeard Incel, Micropenis, "Known Troubled Person", Creator of "Massive vs the Masses", Self-Described "Noise Making Thing"; Lives in Niantic, CT

[AnOminous]

Sperging incoming
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None of us would ever call you "she," Jake. Ever.

Also, I laughed my ass off at the thought of some rickety piece of shit falling on Jake while he was having a nightmare. The image of this blubbery oaf flailing around crazily as some disaster he created for himself occurs is hilarious.

 

[Apteryx Owenii]

"friends" ha

Yeah, okay, so what can you do to change that scenario? Because even through the lens of Ja... er Violet Hargrave or whatever, you're just doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. How insane do you have to be to recognize this pattern and somehow think that making more noise is going to change it? Why not do something different? Like stop doing that?

Or change your fucking creepy avatar and get a job, but whatever, keep squealing over gamergate. Cause that has made your life so important.

Edit: now we have the antagonist of suicide prevention cat: concussion-causing lamp.

 

[Sylvie Paula Paula]

Sperging incoming
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Why would Ms. Gamer Girl compare something as miniscule as whatever she's going through to the Kavanaugh situation? That's stooping pretty low, honestly.

 

[repentance]

http://archive.fo/JdahB

Note that none of the justifications for using Twitter which Jake lists there require him to tweet 50 times a day. In fact his tweetstorms tend to quickly bury his posts about needing housing/money/a fairy godmother so few people see them.

 

[Clockwork Dragon]

Yeah, I know if I were in an "abusive and dangerous living situation" and "under extreme stress," Jake is the first person I would turn to in order to remedy it. And also I would log on Twitter to tell everyone about it. FFS. He gives H.P. Lovecraft a run for his money with the quality of his purple prose (except at least HPL wrote interesting and entertaining shit. And also had real friends who cared about him, and who didn't complain about his circumstances, even though he literally did live in a dangerous situation).

 

[AnOminous]

Somehow he's managed to survive this "abusive and dangerous living situation" for his entire fucking life.

 

[DrJonesHat]

I always assumed that when we have the fabled Gathering of the Kiwis, a Massive vs. the Masses tournament would probably be on our agenda. We could offer Jake space on a "panel" to discuss it. The only other panelist will be a life-size cardboard cutout of Zoe Quinn.

We could invite Based Blue as our keynote speaker, and give her a taser as a token of our esteem. She's a very smart person, she'd work out what to do next.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

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http://archive.fo/JdahB

Note that none of the justifications for using Twitter which Jake lists there require him to tweet 50 times a day. In fact his tweetstorms tend to quickly bury his posts about needing housing/money/a fairy godmother so few people see them.

He's not going to get any help, especially since we are the only people who know where he lives, and if they did see him in real life, we all know how well that would end.

 

[Hellfire]

Before the story about the lamp (archive http://archive.li/uitXP) and trying to compare people not wanting to talk to him/not wanting to be lied about by him to the Kavanaugh circus, Jake was sperging about various things.

Cow crossover.

Random D&D/RPG sperging.




Response to someone replying to the lamp Googleshng. http://archive.fo/hU1C8

Crossover.


Cow crossover. Back to orbiting Rebecca.

Cow crossovers. Jake hates FFX because the main characters don't die like mooks or something.

 

[repentance]

He's not going to get any help, especially since we are the only people who know where he lives, and if they did see him in real life, we all know how well that would end.

Jake legitimately doesn't understand why people don't fall over themselves to help him or why he always ends up alienating people who start out somewhat supportive of him.

 

[Water-T]

Yes, Jake. It's "Stalkers" that are driving your "friends" away. I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that you've made enemies of both Quinn and Soha, and do nothing but constantly abloo-abloo-abloo about imaginary Nazi hit squads and lesbian rape gangs swarming a quiet CT suburb in order to search for you, Jakey.

Oooooh - Jake is this close to achieving self-awareness. Yes, all you do is pull the "wounded gazelle" gambit over and over, to continually dwindling returns. You're the Boy Who Cried Wolf, and the villagers are tired of hearing you whine about "attacks" that are nothing more than you being butthurt that you've been blocked by SJW movers and shakers for either getting on their bad side or just annoying the fuck out of them until they mute your gnome ass.

 

[Ruin]

Come to think of it what the fuck is exactly wrong with Jake medically? He's 37 and looks 70+, even accounting for an unhealthy diet/sedentary lifestyle he shouldn't look 35+ years older than he is.

 

[andr0id psycho sho(ker]

Come to think of it what the fuck is exactly wrong with Jake medically? He's 37 and looks 70+, even accounting for an unhealthy diet/sedentary lifestyle he shouldn't look 35+ years older than he is.

a wacky sleep schedule, minimal life outside the house and constant bitterness, madness and resentment?

 

[Um Oh Ah Yeah]

He also has unfortunate facial features, and started balding and going gray a little young.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Come to think of it what the fuck is exactly wrong with Jake medically? He's 37 and looks 70+, even accounting for an unhealthy diet/sedentary lifestyle he shouldn't look 35+ years older than he is.

Sedentary is a gross understatement. the guy has virtually not left his mom’s attic for twenty years.

He probably doesn’t take more than fifty steps a day. He sits hunched over his computer all his waking hours. Maybe three hours a month riding in a taxi to whine in an therapists office is the extent of his leaving his hovel, besides trips with mommy on occasion. (His yearly three day gencon trips are over)

The only things that make him sweat is being morbidly obese and getting blocked on twitter, so he swears a lot from doing nothing. Hes incredibly hairy but never showers. He’s worn the same eight shirts for two decades.

Jake is the end result stewing in his own juices and after twenty years his juices are wicked rancid. He’s basically been in hyper-decay mode since he gratuated high school.

 

[Maggots on a Train v2]

None of us would ever call you "she," Jake. Ever.

Also, I laughed my ass off at the thought of some rickety piece of shit falling on Jake while he was having a nightmare. The image of this blubbery oaf flailing around crazily as some disaster he created for himself occurs is hilarious.

Suicide Prevention Cat is past ready for a new owner, he's taking matters into his own paws.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

It’s endlessly amusing how Jake always paints himself as an expert on any subject he interjects himself into but then fails to provide any actual information or expert opinion.

 

[Test Business]

Cow crossovers. Jake hates FFX because the main characters don't die like mooks or something.
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Person: I'm thinking about playing this game
Jake: Here is a spoilery plot point from the last 3rd of the game

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole]

"If you're frightened of dying, and you're holding on. You'll see devils tearing your life away. If you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels,... Freeing you from the [stupid twitter cliques & banlists]."

 

[MyOtherNicknameIsAPun]

I have a few days of free time from work but reading SecretGnomeGrill thread has a side effect of me going back to work thinking "is reading this screed really the best use of my time?". So, thanks for scoring me even more booze money, I'll needed it later to read this thread again.