That's a professional photo of Jake's dad, so he probably also made a bit more effort. He looks a bit rougher in this snapshot, but again at least maintains his facial hair.
Jesus, I feel sorry for this dude. Could you imagine being 60 years old and your son lives in the attic screeching he needs titty-skittles and to call him a girl?
In the old days, the family would just smother him, bury him out back, and claim he's backpacking through Europe.
Telling people off on Twitter is the only power he has in the world. He likes to make the most of that moment of perceived righteousness while he composes his next CHELSAAAY COME BACK TO ME ramble.
Jesus Christ Jake it's fucking over, only reason anyone ever mentions it is because you idiots won't stfu.
Jake and all these sjws remind me of stories of Jap soldiers stranded on islands in the Pacific for decades after World War 2 not realizing the war is over.
I stopped checking this thread about a month ago due to boredom and repetition from Jakey-poo. Other than the family revelations (which are interesting and I too am in awe of how Jake’s at-least-normally attractive parents made... him) Jake himself is still tweeting the same insane screeds while sitting in the attic soaking up his mother’s meager resources like the loser he is. Does he seriously have Twitter followers who read all his sperging? My eyes glaze over after the first Tweet and even if I read the words I can parse no meaning.
Mad props to Hellfire and repentance for taking it for the team.
Sounds like Jake inherited the same form of mental illness his grandma suffered from. Seems like it gets worse with age so I can only imagine what Jake will be like if he makes it near Grandma DiCarlas age.
Jake will cash any inheritance early enough to start causing problems for himself. Just imagine him without his parents, a large set of cash and nothing else
They won't stop talking about it because they need it as badly as they need the KKK.
The truth is that a big chunk of the audience is rejecting lots of new content because it is lackluster at best. But it's comforting to fantasize there is a cabal of shadowy evil people trying to keep you down because you "challenge them."
I like how Jake doesn’t understand the dynamics of visiting someone when they have a job. Like obviously they are going to leave you to your own devices while they go to work and hang out with you at night. You’re expected to entertain yourself in the city because normal people have to work and can’t burn their vacation days to babysit you. I can imagine this neediness resulted in Jonno finally disengaging from Jake.
How could Jake not see the parallel between what he was doing at his cousins place, and what his grandmother was doing at his? He laid on the couch for a week moping unless his cousin explicitly took him somewhere and bought him food. His grandmother laid around for nearly two weeks and Jake could do nothing but shriek that his mom was taking care of her and not him because he's such a failure.
The only difference is his cousin is a Very Good Person and Jake is just a Fat Noise Making Thing who can't see Reality.
According to Jake in early 2016, the last time he spoke to his father papa Alley had broke down sobbing and shouted, "They ruined you!" http://archive.li/MLn7u
He stopped calling Jake on his birthday after whatever happened when they last spoke. http://archive.li/b69Hq
We have seen countless times that Jake is not only an unreliable narrator and willing liar, he also has a poor grasp on time, such as when he described events from early 2016 to late 2017 and it was presented as if it had all happened within days/weeks. With that in mind, let us take a look at the last time Jake mentioned seeing his father, which may be what those 2016 tweets are about.
In 2012, Jake described his visit with his father "a year or two ago" and had flown down to see him over the summer. https://archive.fo/Coenm#selection-3172.1-3270.9 (Ten years before this post, at Christmas 2002, Jake's dad had invited Jake to his wedding in Georgia, Jake declined because it was going to be in August and Jake said he couldn't "take the heat." https://archive.li/ZQfay#selection-209.0-208.1)
According to Jake, he and his father didn't recognize each other at the airport. This was caused in part by Jake now being taller than his dad, the dad somehow only having a photo of 13-year-old Jake as the most recent, and "gray/missing hair." Jake says his dad was "visibly horrified" by the condition of Jake's hair. https://archive.fo/wErMr#selection-880.1-978.1
Since Jake himself couldn't even say which year this happened in, we'll say it was in either 2010 or 2011, the following is how he looked in 2009 so it is very understandable that his father wouldn't recognize Jake, who had gone bald, had a large beard, and had patches of grey hair already.
During the Georgia visit they went to a con where Jake was going to try to sell The Massive vs. the masses, and, according to Jake his dad "went and started insulting everyone in my actual family, tried joking about various times he put my life in serious danger as a kid, and generally made a huge awkward embarrassing scene while I'm trying to run game demos at a con by drunkenly crying, loudly asking "Would you @#$% her?" about girls sitting literally about a meter away, staring at him in disgust, and picking fights with people, before wandering off to sleep with a stranger and leaving me stranded in a hotel basement until 6 AM. Then explaining his crazy racist new worldview on the ride home."
Note the final sentences there directed at the post he replied to about birthday calls. After his birthday in 2011 Jake had been glad his dad had not called him as he usually did, so it is possible the Georgia trip was in 2010 and that was the last time Jake spoke to him. Alternatively, maybe the missed birthday call prompted Jake's dad to invite him to visit again and it was in 2011. https://archive.fo/5s1sv#selection-2697.21-2684.11
Whatever the case may be, it is obvious that Jake's dad gets the same treatment Jake gives to all his other family members (like his poor mom) and has been negatively commented on by Jake for quite some time.
@Hellfire has done an extraordinary job combing through Jake's Talking Time posts and archiving them. Let's take a look at Jake's feelings about his grandmother, Donna DiCarlo. Keep in mind that these comments were made in 2011, when Jake was 30.
Let us set the stage a little using some of the Jake posts we haven't seen before: Jake was 30 at the time he was writing these things about grandma. He likes to use "my" to refer to things like food and the couch even though he was then, and still is, living with his mother Rachel. He was in debt for somewhere between $20,000-$30,000 from producing The Massive vs. the masses (see this post for a closer look at the history of Jake's Massive failure), and refused to accept that his games had flopped and he needed to put it aside and get an actual income source.
In May 2010 Jake claimed Monsterpocalypse had stolen the thematic elements of his game after he had been enraged upon seeing Monsterpocalypse had a movie deal. Jake wasn't sure if he could get away with suing them for copyright infringement when his own game was a Godzilla parody, but "at the very least [he] should at least be raising a big public fuss, get some free press out of it, maybe some money of some sort to smooth things over." https://archive.fo/3zWcb
In September 2010, Jake was discussing game designs and how he went for a "modular mix and match approach," then admitted "stuff [he designs] also doesn't sell." https://archive.fo/5Z6Sc#selection-3006.1-3104.14
Jake was still hopeful that he could get an expansion produced for The Massive vs. masses in late September 2010, but clearly had no idea or ability to acquire the $30,000 he said it would cost. https://archive.fo/ybJD1#selection-2935.1-2892.7
The lolsuit bloodlust returned two days after that last post when Jake found out that a local store he had tried to convince to buy some copies of The Massive vs. the masses supposedly told him they didn't need his game because they had bought "basically the exact same thing" with Monsterpocalypse. https://archive.li/lVtSP#selection-4066.1-4164.17
Jake mentioned having "horrible financial problems" in January 2011, and I presume he is blaming Monsterpocalype for "people effectively stealing the food from [his] mouth." https://archive.fo/kYzMz#selection-2366.1-2464.7
In February 2011, the lolsuit bloodlust returned and Jake tried to rage about the situation in a way that would not be "legally bothersome" by substituting a "pizza oven" for The Massive vs. the masses and Monsterpocalypse. He was quite upset because his "close friends and family members" had not bought Monsterpocalypse out of respect for Jake, but did buy other Privateer Press products. "I'm still over here unable to sell pizza because of the thieves these people are getting their lunch from have my oven." https://archive.li/TvOzH#selection-5346.1-5444.13
In April 2011, Jake was trying to make a public beta version of an RPG idea he had been working on sporadically for around a decade, he looked at the skill set for it and suddenly realized it was a "horribly written, horribly balanced, completely unplayable system that I'm going to have to completely throw out and replace with something completely new, likely gutting half the core mechanics in the process." https://archive.fo/ssR3o#selection-4142.1-4240.5
Not long after that, Jake was "freaked out" after he began to think about how nothing he has ever done or ever will do "is of any real interest or use to anyone" and that he will "just drift along continuing to fail in all [his] endeavors until those supporting [him] out of guilt/pity get over it and abandon [Jake] to die in the street." https://archive.fo/vAQ5t#selection-2300.1-2398.5
Jake called his grandmother a "horrible witch" while trying to offer someone a room or house to rent/buy from her. https://archive.fo/UVsqt#selection-3804.1-3902.1
Shortly before the grandma rants and a few days after his birthday in June 2011, Jake admitted that the planned expansions to The Massive vs. the masses were not "likely to be published in the at all reasonable future." https://archive.fo/cr5Gb#selection-2708.1-2896.1
Jono seems to have still been trying to help Jake at this point. https://archive.fo/KUwiZ#selection-2958.1-3056.13
Now that brings us to July 2011, so let's take a look at Jake almost perfectly describing himself when he was hating on his grandma. It is fascinating how much all of this either directly describes Jake or describes him with slight alteration. When Jake is talking about lesbians, cishet men, Nazis, Gamergaters, etc. all wanting to rape and murder him as soon as he steps foot outside, he might actually believe that.
"kinda burned all her bridges over the years"
"never leaves her house and insists people bring her food and money to live off"
"won't pick up her phone when you call because you may be someone who's After Her"
"otherwise is just paralyzed with fear of every possible thing ever"
"she convinced herself someone was going to break into her room and kill her, so now she has to lay low here, locking all my doors (even those not leading outside) closing window shades, and 'wearing a disguise'"
"presumably never will [see a psychiatrist]. Because that would not only involve actually leaving her house, but also accepting advice from someone"
"isn't it great having an insane family member crashing on your couch and asking if you'd be able to hear them screaming from the other room if someone broke in to murder them?"
"she's been pretty much exactly this crazy for at least the last 50 years"
"I'm just leaving her to lay around on my couch playing Tetris all day, feeding her, and trying to offer her solutions to her problems, but she is just here as a burden on my life"
"she would just lay around the house all day, never doing anything, and expecting her kids to take care of her"
"The only reason they didn't flat out starve to death is that my great grandmother and her sisters swung by now and then to pay her bills and buy her groceries. […] which she's still relying on them to do to this day."
"Seriously, we're talking about a 70 year old woman expecting her two 90 year old aunts (along with her children and grandchildren) to pay all her bills and solve all her problems, because she never freaking grew up."
"she's kinda like Gollum. Sure she's a twisted, bitter, evil little thing, and you know all you're going to get from trying to be nice to her is all your food stolen, your friends turned against you, and maybe even your finger bitten off, but she's just so darn pathetic you can't help feeling pity for her."
"Plus, you know, personally, I have no money and no real source of income. I'm forced to sponge off the same people she does, so I'm not really in a position to go against their wishes on how to deal with her."
"she freaks out and rushes over here to hide, in fear that he will kill her (her standard reaction to most situations)"
"After 3 #$%@ing weeks of her just generally trashing the place setting up her filthy little paranoia nest and doing nothing but chain smoke, eat all my food, and play Tetris on her phone"
"turns out she still hasn't gone home, she just found someone else to abuse the hospitality of"
Jake raged a few more times about grandma in the following year. In March 2012, Jake complained that his grandma kept turning down women who wanted to rent a room. "Either she's hoping to rent all her rooms out to people she on whom she can use her feminine wiles to get them to run errands for her, or she's just intentionally sabotaging herself to get extra pity for herself." https://archive.fo/1Gm9y#selection-1082.1-1180.11
In May 2012, Jake chimped out because his grandma kept turning down offers on his great-grandma's house, she had mortgaged her house to "buy stupid @#$% she doesn't need," had been "bending over backwards to scare off everyone answering her ads to rent rooms," was refusing "all forms of reasonable help and advice," had begged everyone in the family for "thousands and thousands of dollars" only to "buy more stupid @#$%" instead of paying her mortgage and supposedly was being foreclosed on. https://archive.fo/4l4Wg#selection-5768.1-5866.31
I'll throw this one in here too, one of the things Jake loves to use to manipulate people is to claim that he is on the verge of homelessness (and recently he flat out lied and said he was homeless in an attempt to grift money), he's been claiming that for at least two years under the "secretgamergrrl" accounts. It turns out that Jake has been claiming some variation of "one step away from homelessness" for the past 6 years, going back to at least 2012. https://archive.fo/yGyFF#selection-677.1-770.7
Coincidentally, I happened to see that Monsterpocalypse is releasing a new version of the game tomorrow. Monsterpocalypse's 10th anniversary is sometime this year. https://www.monsterpocalypse.com/
The utter lack of self-awareness (and the utter lack of compassion or empathy) regarding his clearly ill and mentally ill grandmother is simply breathtaking. Holy crap.
The truth is that a big chunk of the audience is rejecting lots of new content because it is lackluster at best. But it's comforting to fantasize there is a cabal of shadowy evil people trying to keep you down because you "challenge them."
He's the SJW version of that hillbilly whose teeth all fell out from meth and booze, sitting on a bar stool saying he's a failure because of da j0000ze.
According to Jake in early 2016, the last time he spoke to his father papa Alley had broke down sobbing and shouted, "They ruined you!" http://archive.li/MLn7u
