Products to fancy up your vagina - because it's not good enough on its own

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Another product that didn't do so well were Linger Vaginal Mints, which are exactly what they sound like... mints for your vagina. Turned out to be a bad idea and appear to be no longer on the market.

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A few articles on them:

https://www.yourtango.com/200939836/linger-vagina-mint

https://www.vagabomb.com/Why-do-our-vaginas-need-to-smell-minty/
 
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Rabbit Bones said:
If your man is only interested in your pussy because it's glittery and fabulous, I'm sorry, but you're dating a closeted gay.
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I knew a guy in 8th grade who claimed to be bi. One day he was telling me about how he had sex with some chick (she didn't go to our school) and enjoyed it, but also described it as "gross" because "she had pussy juice." I told him that's normal, he insisted it wasn't and it was gross and I just went "Dude, you're not bi, you're straight up gay." He insisted he wasn't, but sure enough that turned out to be the case.
 
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Jack MeHoff said:
"Get your vag mints here! That's right, ladies! Cover up that souring bread scent with our patented vag mints! Only you will know what yeasty surprise will Linger beneath the fresh minty scent and spearmint coated sourdough!"
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Mints and goos and glitter are going to give you a yeast infection, which will be infinitely more smelly than if you simply washed your vag and didn't put anything inside that isn't dicks or clean sex toys.

Did these companies miss that part of Human Growth and Development where the teachers told us "don't fucking douche or put any weird products inside your vag; you vag is self cleaning from the inside"?
 
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multiverse said:
Mints and goos and glitter are going to give you a yeast infection, which will be infinitely more smelly than if you simply washed your vag and didn't put anything inside that isn't dicks or clean sex toys.

Did these companies miss that part of Human Growth and Development where the teachers told us "don't fucking douche or put any weird products inside your vag; you vag is self cleaning from the inside"?
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They seem to think that everyone is into woo-type frilly speshul products you'd see some free bleeding feminist shilling.

I'm waiting for a Bedazzled Diva Cup to show up.
 
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multiverse said:
Mints and goos and glitter are going to give you a yeast infection, which will be infinitely more smelly than if you simply washed your vag and didn't put anything inside that isn't dicks or clean sex toys.

Did these companies miss that part of Human Growth and Development where the teachers told us "don't fucking douche or put any weird products inside your vag; you vag is self cleaning from the inside"?
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Even doctors don't tell you to douche it up anymore unless it's for actual medical purposes. When I was a kid I'd see wall to wall douche commercials on TV. I remember being too young to understand why all these women weren't feeling fresh and why they needed a bottle with a weird nozzle so they could smile and play tennis again.:lol:

They shilled this stuff for decades. Lysol was originally a vag douche. You have to wonder how irritated and uncomfortable these women were because the media was constantly shilling douches. And likely they'd be told "you just need more douche to feel better".

Now we've got cooter mints and glitter to jazz up your jizz hole. It literally never ends. Next there will be an iPhone you can stick up there.
 
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multiverse said:
Did these companies miss that part of Human Growth and Development where the teachers told us "don't fucking douche or put any weird products inside your vag; you vag is self cleaning from the inside"?
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I went to school in an abstinence-only sex ed state and discussion about genitals was strictly off limits for the regular teacher: only the special abstinence-only sex ed women (I'm honestly not sure they had any teaching credentials) were allowed to talk about anything vaguely related to sex. Needless to say every sex ed class was about how pre marital sex will ruin your life in various ways and the only time genitals came up was to show graphic photos of STDs.
 
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You'd think by now most people have figured out a wipe on the outside with water is more than enough for healthy pussies.

Then again, I might be lucky that in my day, despite the abstinence-emphasized sex ed, pussies were described as self-regulating.
 
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MysticMisty said:
I went to school in an abstinence-only sex ed state and discussion about genitals was strictly off limits for the regular teacher: only the special abstinence-only sex ed women (I'm honestly not sure they had any teaching credentials) were allowed to talk about anything vaguely related to sex. Needless to say every sex ed class was about how pre marital sex will ruin your life in various ways and the only time genitals came up was to show graphic photos of STDs.
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I got lucky, my home state has probably stopped comprehensive sex ed at this point, but I came of age before the abstinence only thing got rolling outside the deep South. Although there was a hilarious health class in high school where a purse-lipped "guest speaker" warned us girls to "never, ever let a boy talk you into anal sex! It's not right! Boys and girls are like two puzzle pieces and that just won't fit!" I suspect she was from a church group.
 
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multiverse said:
I got lucky, my home state has probably stopped comprehensive sex ed at this point, but I came of age before the abstinence only thing got rolling outside the deep South. Although there was a hilarious health class in high school where a purse-lipped "guest speaker" warned us girls to "never, ever let a boy talk you into anal sex! It's not right! Boys and girls are like two puzzle pieces and that just won't fit!" I suspect she was from a church group.
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I remember a teacher back in middle school explaining to us that gay men had sex by trying to stuff their penis inside the urethra of their partner.

Jesus christ.
 
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Dysnomia said:
They shilled this stuff for decades. Lysol was originally a vag douche. You have to wonder how irritated and uncomfortable these women were because the media was constantly shilling douches. And likely they'd be told "you just need more douche to feel better".
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Geez. Maybe this is why the prevailing thought amongst some older women is that sex is unpleasant.
 
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Lysol was an early douche product that was also slyly advertised as ridding the body of “organic matter” as well as odor.

It was a covert abortion product, basically.

Douche ads are nothing new, the whole point of marketing is to convince people they have a problem and then offer to fix it. Like how everyone thought deodorant was bad for you until the marketers started running ads about how a woman would never get married or be in the right social circles if she didn’t stop emitting armpit odors that everyone else was just too polite to mention.
 
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Happy Sugar Life said:
Not exactly a product to “fancy up” your snatch but somewhat related - a few years ago some quack chiropractor tried to market a glue that would hold your labia closed to catch your period without the need for pads or tampons. It went over as well as you would expect.


According to their website at the time, ‘Mensez’ is a lipstick that, when applied to the labia minora, creates a temporary seal to retain menstrual fluids inside until urination. The urine instantly releases the seal and everything washes away into the toilet.


Shockingly, women didn’t immediately start throwing their money at this and the product didn’t take off. The website is still up, though they seem to have rebranded as a company that will produce wet wipes for periods instead.
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I remember this, the chiro had an absolute shit fit when a gynecologist wrote an open letter to show proof that his product works like he says it does. He wrote back a huge salty, rant about how women are too stupid to know how vaginas work, because that's how you get your market base to buy your product; insult them.

It looks like the facebook for the product references the rant the chiro made, the coward deleted it lol.
 
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HIVidaBoheme said:
Here are some more stuff not mentioned yet: like clit piercings, non piercing labia clip, vaginal facials and laser rejuvenations.

https://www.stayathomemum.com.au/bodyandsoul/diy-beauty/8-ways-to-make-your-vagina-look-pretty/
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Aside from how obscenely sad this “article” is, how is a clit piercing decorating or doing anything to the vagina? It’s not in or on your vagina, and most people who get them say they don’t notice them after a while of getting it pierced. Genital searing bleach is bad, but it makes sense on the list, because you’re actually doing something to your vagina.
 
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