Secret Gamer Girl / SecretGamerGrrl / Googleshng / "Violet Hargrave" / Jacob Lawrence (Jake) Alley / Violet Cassandra Ocean - Delusional Zoe Quinn Stalker, Libelous Tweeter, Thirsty Gnome, Faux-Tranny Neckbeard Incel, Micropenis, "Known Troubled Person", Creator of "Massive vs the Masses", Self-Described "Noise Making Thing"; Lives in Niantic, CT

[DrJonesHat]

@Yellow Yam Scam you've been in this thread too long if you can think like Jake. Remember the thing about gazing into the abyss? It's gazed into you man.

 

[Apteryx Owenii]

Equally likely, though, is that one of his shrinking number of troon pals called 911 for something and Jake saw it on Twitter.

That would be my thought. Remember how he suddenly became close to Chole post-mortem because it would allow him to try and grab some of the drama around her death.

 

[Um Oh Ah Yeah]

Yeah, Jake is using his passive voice, which means that he saw someone else tweet about calling 911, and that put him in such a state that he had to mention it.

 

[repentance]

Let's see what Jake's excuse is for not pursuing this.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Let's see what Jake's excuse is for not pursuing this.

View attachment 620331

Because Be Bold is basically just a person with a Patreon that makes slightly less than Jake. At one time it appears they actually had a real job in the games industry of some sort but are now “freelance.” Be Bold sounds more like Jake’s competition.

Jake is only interested if you got a real job at one of his preferred gaming companies of choice or a large twitter following or SJW fame. He can’t waste his time bootlicking nobodies. He has to make his hours of offering to slide into the DMs count!

 

[Done]

@Yellow Yam Scam you've been in this thread too long if you can think like Jake. Remember the thing about gazing into the abyss? It's gazed into you man.

I think as long as @Yellow Yam Scam stays away from Ranma 1/2, table top games and keeps his beard short, he will be safe.

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole]

I still think there is some kind of deadline looming that he hasn't fully accepted, which would explain why he's asking about cons. He probably doesn't think his mom will enforce it and she again reminded him he needs to be job searching and making plans to move out and not tweeting all night. That might have triggered a blow-up, and if Jake threatened her, she might have been scared enough to call the cops. He might be a coward normally, but if we're right, he's about to get shoved into the real world against his will and NEETs have been known to get violent when their cushy (and it is) life is suddenly threatened.

When reading this thread I've been thinking about that hypothetical deadline. Jake is ~38 with no education, no marketable skills, no prior job experience(a couple of months at walmart two decades ago doesn't count), no social skills or life experience either, so his patient mom probably knows that his job prospects aren't great and being coddling she probably won't kick him straight into the deep end. She might be pushing him to start taking some classes of some kind starting in 2019 or get him out of the house for a couple of hours each day to do something than sperg on twitter during the night, essentially rehabbing him into having more normal hours and doing more normal things, maybe learn the basics of a trade if he takes classes that can lead to a job. Or maybe even some of those "adulting classes" there was a thread about in A&H.

It would be a very Jake:y idea to try to collect enough money to run away from that/home/personal responsibility, try to find someone else to split the rent with(but they have to pay for his half), and continue his NEET lifestyle.

 

[repentance]

 

[Done]

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A B U S I V E H O U S E H O L D

 

[Tempest]

 

[galact0r]

I'm guessing the 911 incident involved one of Jake's neighbours becoming seriously ill and having to call an ambulance. The paramedics sped to the scene, sirens blaring. The noise woke Jake from his slumber at the ungodly hour of 9am, a good 6 hours before he normally rises. As a result he was a grumpy, tired little boy.

 

[repentance]

Jake doesn't regard his mother as a woman.

 

[Feline Darkmage]

Jake doesn't regard his mother as a woman.

Or is admitting he doesn't know his mother. As in can't understand her.
Come to think of it, maybe that's why he thinks her being good to him is abuse.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

That would be my thought. Remember how he suddenly became close to Chole post-mortem because it would allow him to try and grab some of the drama around her death.

I’m reminded of the way someone mentioning that they were too shy to ask someone out morphed within a day into a charming romantic comedy where Jake played Cupid to a pair of lovelorn troons. As I’ve said before, he rarely outright directly lies, but he exaggerates and twists the truth beyond any reasonable measure.

I think someone mentioning on Twitter that they called 911 is the most likely version of events. He clearly wasn’t in shock for... 6 hours as he claims, because during those... 6 hours, he was tweeting happily. But Jake’s idea of shocking is so weaksauce that again, he probably doesn’t think it counts as lying.

 

[Done]

Jake doesn't regard his mother as a woman.

That's.. exactly what I thought. Such a weird, but instantly-identifiable form of misogyny.

I also have a feeling that Jake mansplained to his mom about "real horror movies", but I acknowledge this is speculation on my part.

 

[diophantines]

@Yellow Yam Scam still more readable than a googleshng.

 

[pozilei]

Classic Jake. Pretty much the only woman in his real life that he actually knows and interacts with on a regular basis and yet she seemingly doesn't count because she doesn't have a twitter account and danger hair.

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

Oh, ciswomen who don't like horror, sure, he knows some of those.

But women all do.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Actual women like horror movies as often as straight men like romantic comedies or harlequin romance novels.

Jake doesn’t know any real women, besides his blood relatives who obviously don’t count for anything. (I mean come on how womanly is his mom for real? She doesn’t have a girl dick ffs) The only female opinions that count for Jake come from men LARPing as women.

 

[Norvic]

Jake doesn't regard his mother as a woman.

All real women have gnome beards.