A MeToo makeover for James Bond - "It’s young, it’s fun and it is all about female empowerment"

"The 007 number has been taken up by a new agent – a woman – who embarks on a mission which forces Bond to come out of retirement."

Thanks, no, saw this story recently in The Equalizer 2. And I like Denzel Washington much more than I like Daniel Craig, tbh.
 
Here is an idea

Just make a freakin Moneypenny movie to test the waters.

You already got a pretty damn good actress in the role, already established that she is a badass field agent with a personality that strongly contrasts Bond, and there is enough that has been unexplored about her secret agent schtick for a film team to have plenty of choice with how they take the character. And bestest of all she is not only a wammen but a niggo wammen, and that automatically makes any movie she makes untouchable by the REEEEEEEE crowd.

Boom. Everybody wins so long as you shit out a halfway decent movie and you dont have to pay a billion for Danial Craig. Hell you could almost consider it a revival of that whole "GIB HALLIE BERRY A SPINOFF MOVIE!" producer idea from Die Another Day but without an insufferable ultra-diva fucking things up.

And hell if its successful you got a good ten years of use out of Naomi Harris before her cellular structure disintegrates and she turns into Madea like every black woman once they hit the wrong side of 55
 
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KeyserBroze said:
And now James Bond is to be given a comprehensive makeover for the MeToo era by Fleabag, The Mail on Sunday can reveal.
Phoebe Waller-Bridge, creator and star of the acclaimed BBC comedy and also the writer of Killing Eve, has been drafted in by Bond producers for the latest film in the series.
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Oh this will go well for her. If she's lucky, they'll slap her name on it to shut up the faggots while actually using none of her ideas. Otherwise, she will go down in history as the woman who ruined James Bond. Even if we are "misogynists" for pointing that out, everyone will know it.

KeyserBroze said:
One plot being considered involves Craig’s ageing Bond retired and now living in Jamaica – the island where 007 author Ian Fleming had his Goldeneye retreat. The 007 number has been taken up by a new agent – a woman – who embarks on a mission which forces Bond to come out of retirement.
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Oh look! Girl Bond! Because that wasn't a dumb idea when it was first pitched!
 
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Vorhtbame said:
"The 007 number has been taken up by a new agent – a woman – who embarks on a mission which forces Bond to come out of retirement."

Thanks, no, saw this story recently in The Equalizer 2. And I like Denzel Washington much more than I like Daniel Craig, tbh.
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Well, tbf in The Equalizer 2 she was his handler and his good friend and they murked her so he went all Jon Wick.

Also why would that force Bond to come out of retirement unless she fucked up? Like, Bond's on whore island and does he get a call 'Yeah, your female replacement just shit the bed so we need you to come in for one more mission'. Like why would Bond care? If he's at the retirement point, he wouldn't give a fuck.

Just be like "That's what you get when you replace me with a woman. Yeah, complain the HR about it. Oh wait, fuck, that's right you can't, I'm going to go fuck 10 women now at once, also I'm like a millionaire. Bye."

Did they also mention a female Bond doesn't work because its basically obvious that Bond is a clear male power fantasy designed around a super-spy cliche of basically having no strings and not giving a fuck? I mean, that's why the shit works and is the way it is. Also he already had a women resist his charms constantly. Moneypenny motherfucker, Jesus Christ woman, do you fucking know anything?

And while I haven't been interested in Bond in a long long time, this just sounds like one massive fuck-up. Like making him a woman just fucks up the entire character. When he's the essential male fantasy for like 50 years in movies and you remove that, you're basically just confusing people. No one ever thought he was complex and deep. And nobody went to Bond movies for that. Nobody wants to go see a 'woke' Bond film, Jesus.

When will movie executives stop thinking Twitter is reality?
 
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RumblyTumbly said:
Instead of hijacking an established franchise with an established fan base with specific expectations, why not just make a new character that’s a female super spy?

Oh wait that would force them to be creative and we can’t have that.
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You know, there were rumors about spinning off the updated Moneypenny character from Skyfall (as she started out as a field agent). But no, better to ruin an almost 60 year old movie franchise because of flash-in-the-pan hysteria.
 
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An attempt to bring James Bond to the big screen was made in the 1950s, before the iconic Dr No, by the pair who controlled the Casino Royale film rights.

They wanted a woman for the part because they thought the character as written by Ian Fleming was "kind of stupid".

738037


Susan Hayward was offered the role of "Jane Bond", but turned the opportunity down.

Look at me getting an education
 
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KeyserBroze said:
An attempt to bring James Bond to the big screen was made in the 1950s, before the iconic Dr No, by the pair who controlled the Casino Royale film rights.

They wanted a woman for the part because they thought the character as written by Ian Fleming was "kind of stupid".

View attachment 738037

Susan Hayward was offered the role of "Jane Bond", but turned the opportunity down.

Look at me getting an education
Click to expand...

And what did they do in the end? Make James Bond 'Jimmy Bond' a CIA agent and Felix Leiter was the MI6 agent called Clarence.
 
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