حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[Null]

[EDIT: Connor's post history for pretty much everywhere can be found in this post: https://kiwifarms.net/threads/connor-bible.7044/page-254#post-623479 ]


@Connor is a long-term forum user and beloved pet. He's most known for having absolutely no filter and requesting an account deletion every week.

He's repeatedly gotten into the spotlight for saying crazy things, which he almost immediately regrets and tries to cover up by requesting an account deletion. He is literally incapable of staying away from the website, probably because he has nothing better to do.

A frequent user of Wrong Planet, perhaps trying to substitute the forums and keep away, his posts are pretty funny.


A general warning about the CWCki Forums:

https://kiwifarms.st/attachments/connor-tries-to-slander-kiwi-farms-png.12913/

Connor tries to quit masturbating:

https://kiwifarms.st/attachments/connor-tries-to-quit-masturbating-png.12914/

Funny stories include:
- A general distrust of adoptive parents. He got into a fight with Marvin, who was a child reared by foster care, over if foster care parents are at all useful.
- A seething disdain for the moving Juno. This is because it portrayed adoptive parents in a positive light, or something. I ended up streaming Juno for the entire forum at some point and that was pretty fun.
- This fucking quote:
"There are sticky, lint like objects in the area of my groin, and near the perineum. They smell like death. In fact, that is what my groin smells like, even after applying Gold Bond and Lotrimin and taking a long bath."
- One time recently, after asking to be banned for 2 years, I turned his name pink. He seemed to believe this was an actual ban and vanished for a week.

And some other stuff. I just wanted to lay a foundation.

 

[Globe]

Connor has this weird ability to bring out the optimist in me, in more than a schadenfreude kinda way. He'll chimp out and disappear and then come back and every time he does, I find myself hoping that maybe he'll turn over a new leaf. Maybe something some of the people have said here will have sunk. It never does.

 

[Ultimate Grisby]

Don't forget his mad obsession with Molly Ringwald, who hasn't done anything big in years.

 

[TM Ambrose]

Some sperging by Connor. Cataloged by @Pine Tar

 

[namazuros]

He has a point about Juno, that movie fucking blows.

 

[Smutley]

Oh man, wasn't there a time when he thought the forum april fools joke was legit, and everyone who posted here was going to get in trouble?

Or am I thinking of another forum sperg?

 

[Ultimate Grisby]

​

- This fucking quote:
"There are sticky, lint like objects in the area of my groin, and near the perineum. They smell like death. In fact, that is what my groin smells like, even after applying Gold Bond and Lotrimin and taking a long bath."

Okay, I haven't been on this forum for long and thought this was from Christian Chandler regarding his taint piercing whenever I saw the quote pop up. But nope, from our boy Connor. Holy shit, that's disgusting.

 

[Frank Rizzo]

Oh man, wasn't there a time when he thought the forum april fools joke was legit, and everyone who posted here was going to get in trouble?

Or am I thinking of another forum sperg?

Are you referring to the night you guys pretended Chris had killed Barb?

 

[Null]

Oh man, wasn't there a time when he thought the forum april fools joke was legit, and everyone who posted here was going to get in trouble?

Are you talking about Jace? lol

http://lolcow.wiki/wiki/Cwciki_forums_(Jace_Video)

 

[MerriedxReldnahc]

Welp, this thread was bound to happen eventually.
Heres a quick link to his "Redesigning Eva" thread for those wanting to read his novel in progress.
edit: how in the blazes did I manage to forget the link? Didn't notice until the autistic ratings.

 

[Smutley]

Are you talking about Jace? lol

http://lolcow.wiki/wiki/Cwciki_forums_(Jace_Video)

That was the day! Connor saw the notice and freaked the fuck out because he thought it was legit and everyone was going to get busted.

 

[The Knife]

Oh man, wasn't there a time when he thought the forum april fools joke was legit, and everyone who posted here was going to get in trouble?

Or am I thinking of another forum sperg?

Nope. Null posted that the forum was shutting down due to an investigation. Connor believed it.

Related: Connor's computer was having issues. As a joke, someone--I believe Ziltoid--said it was because he (Zilt) hacked it. Connor proceeded to ask Ziltoid about five or six times, in increasingly frantic tones, if he'd really hacked his computer.

 

[ShekelKing]

"There are sticky, lint like objects in the area of my groin, and near the perineum. They smell like death. In fact, that is what my groin smells like, even after applying Gold Bond and Lotrimin and taking a long bath."

Is he talking about smegma? Why would you ever tell somebody you have that?
As for his masturbation habit, he's fully aware that being out of shape is a large factor. Just exercise.

 

[Ronald Gaygun]

Is he talking about smegma? Why would you ever tell somebody you have that?
As for his masturbation habit, he's fully aware that being out of shape is a large factor. Just exercise.

dude, if he's got smegma like, overflowing into his crotchal region, that's fudcked up man. not a mental image i've ever wanted.

 

[Poor Choices]

@Null I am the only one having troubles reading Connor's warning about CWCkiforums or his masturbating?

Edit:Never mind I am retarded; you have to open it in a different tab

 

[The Knife]

And then there was the time Connor described for chat his sexual fantasy of fucking Molly Ringwald, in the bellybutton, in an abandoned chapel while this song played:

Ice cubes and olive oil were involved, iirc

 

[wagglyplacebo]

@Null I am the only one having troubles reading Connor's warning about CWCkiforums or his masturbating?

I had that problem too, you can just right click then view image.

 

[Cute Anime Girl]

dude, if he's got smegma like, overflowing into his crotchal region, that's fudcked up man. not a mental image i've ever wanted.

If it is in fact smegma he's talking about, how often does he bathe? Seriously take a fucking shower.

The only excuse for this shit is if you're homeless or in some 3rd World hole and only bathe like once a month.

 

[The Knife]

If it is in fact smegma he's talking about, how often does he bathe? Seriously take a fucking shower.

The only excuse for this shit is if you're homeless or in some 3rd World hole and only bathe like once a month.

Not to be too gross, but it sounds like some sort of fungal infection.

 

[Locksnap]

I found this thread of his in Spergatory to be very illuminating. http://cwckiforums.com/threads/suggestion-and-update-thread-connor-autism.5093/