- Joined
- Sep 16, 2013
I'm really disappointed in Connor, but quite frankly, I'm not surprised. I probably wouldn't want to go somewhere where I knew I'd be recorded for the purpose of laughing at me.
حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker
- Thread starter Null
- Start date
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2013
Thank you, Doctor. I'll tear into this tomorrow.
I can already tell this will be... interesting. There appears to be 11 chapters in this post but the word count per chapter is staggeringly low.
UPDATE: I copy/pasted it into Word to make things easier. All told these 11 chapters contain only 13,501 words. That's like two to three chapters in a normal book. Hell, I've read fanfics with longer chapters than this.
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2014
You can see Jace look off camera at the producers because not even Jace could find a way to react to Connor's stupidity besides a stone cold look of general annoyance.
Kidding aside, atleast Kengel annoyed Jace enough to get threatened to be killed. Connor just got called a retard and brushed aside...which probably happens alot to him with normal people as well.
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2013
that might be a different connor. compare this video of connor reciting a poem to see for yourself, but that doesn't sound like him to me.
- Joined
- Jul 31, 2014
I really wanted to be right... Ah well.
- Joined
- Jan 3, 2014
So you fled from TeamSpeak. Good... good. Do not come back there - or here.
You do not have time for some weirdos on the internet who make fun of you. This is your life, and it's ending one moment at a time. Is this how you hope to become an accomplished writer, by wasting your time talking to us?
You're in this alone, remember. No one can do the hard work for you, ever. BUT, maybe if you actually start doing things rather than just talking about doing them, you will find some friends along the way - people who will share your interests and will gladly help you out.
Life is tough, Connor. You have no idea. Now is your turn, make your move. Go out there and struggle like you've never before. Live while you still can. Reach for the stars.
And stop posting on Wrong Planet, too.
You do not have time for some weirdos on the internet who make fun of you. This is your life, and it's ending one moment at a time. Is this how you hope to become an accomplished writer, by wasting your time talking to us?
You're in this alone, remember. No one can do the hard work for you, ever. BUT, maybe if you actually start doing things rather than just talking about doing them, you will find some friends along the way - people who will share your interests and will gladly help you out.
Life is tough, Connor. You have no idea. Now is your turn, make your move. Go out there and struggle like you've never before. Live while you still can. Reach for the stars.
And stop posting on Wrong Planet, too.
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2014
Connor I have some tips for writing:
1. Keep notepad everywhere and write down all your ideas
2. You can use ideas used in films, but you have to interpret them in your own way. Copying them directly is plagiarism. (unless you are writing fan fiction)
3. If you make sexy scenes, do them in a less pornographic way.
4. Keep a book special for characters, in the book you write notes about each one from age to how they hold themselves, to family history. It's important to keep characters consistent, and to help keep your mind on what they would do in each scene.
5. Make sure you know what is going to happen in each chapter from A to B. And that something actually happens in the chapters, even the ones that are fillers.
6. Have fun writing
7. Set yourself a goal each day in writing
8. Be nice to people giving constructive criticism, they are only trying to help you and they were nice enough to read your story.
I hope these help you write more.
1. Keep notepad everywhere and write down all your ideas
2. You can use ideas used in films, but you have to interpret them in your own way. Copying them directly is plagiarism. (unless you are writing fan fiction)
3. If you make sexy scenes, do them in a less pornographic way.
4. Keep a book special for characters, in the book you write notes about each one from age to how they hold themselves, to family history. It's important to keep characters consistent, and to help keep your mind on what they would do in each scene.
5. Make sure you know what is going to happen in each chapter from A to B. And that something actually happens in the chapters, even the ones that are fillers.
6. Have fun writing
7. Set yourself a goal each day in writing
8. Be nice to people giving constructive criticism, they are only trying to help you and they were nice enough to read your story.
I hope these help you write more.
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2014
Reading through this thread makes me want to get off my lazy butt and write something. I haven't finished a full work in far too long.
Thanks, @Connor!
Thanks, @Connor!
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2013
[NOTE: Build-Your-Own-Connor caps have unfortunately gone missing. Apologies, but the following pages should give you plenty of information towards Building-Your-Own-Connor]
Good morning! Since Connor seems to only show up at night, I know a lot of you can get some withdraw. Where are the laughs? Where is the anger? Where is the pathos? Well it's only around for a few hours a day and that's not enough.
Luckily he's as predictable as Moleman and as talented as Joe Cracker, so I'm going to show you guys how to build your own Connor to take with you anywhere!
Step 1: Announce yourself on any forum you join. You are a popular person and everyone should know who you are by now. Make sure to throw in words like "artsy" and "psychological" because it makes it sound like you're intelligent, like you might read Nietzsche or Kafka or Dostoevsky.
Step 2: Bring up adoption at your first possible chance - like starting a thread the same day you join and mention it. Make sure to talk about how busy you are so people know you are busy, and assume everyone will flood the thread to decry adoption and "start a debate". Bonus points if you give a pithy response to great advice you will make sure not to follow later in life.
Step 3: regurgitate advice you received a week earlier, as if you have always known it and always act on it.
Step 4a: At your first chance, talk about your never-finished novel Redesigning Eva. Make sure to use a ton of adjectives but don't give any reason that anyone would care. For extra realism, make sure to ignore the advice you were given (and gave out) a month earlier.
Step 4b: People will come to your thread to give you advice instead of asspats. When this happens make up as many excuses as you can. "Draft things out first"? I like to write stream of conscious. "Maybe this can help add things to your story"? I don't know why I'm writing what I write. "Stop being a perfectionist and just write"? I've tried EVERYTHING!!!
Step 5: Talk about your quirks! Make sure it's apparent you want to write something as gritty as Reservoir Dogs but as meandering as Pulp Fiction. Bonus points if you talk about how your dialog isn't even related to your story and it's filled with movie lines lifted verbatim.
Step 6: Talk about your original obsession Alpha Boy. Announce how you've changed and grown, and are now ready to tackle this long-held, much-loved project. If you are Young Connor, make sure Alphaboy is a ripoff of Akira and Superman. Beg people to basically write your stories for you and reiterate just how busy you are coming up with ideas instead of actually writing. For bonus laughs make a main character a Juno insert.
Step 7: When people don't write your stories for you, when you get more advice than asspats, and when no one fights you about adoption or women, you have won at being Connor! Find a new forum and start over at Step 1. Congratulations!
Good morning! Since Connor seems to only show up at night, I know a lot of you can get some withdraw. Where are the laughs? Where is the anger? Where is the pathos? Well it's only around for a few hours a day and that's not enough.
Luckily he's as predictable as Moleman and as talented as Joe Cracker, so I'm going to show you guys how to build your own Connor to take with you anywhere!
Step 1: Announce yourself on any forum you join. You are a popular person and everyone should know who you are by now. Make sure to throw in words like "artsy" and "psychological" because it makes it sound like you're intelligent, like you might read Nietzsche or Kafka or Dostoevsky.
Step 2: Bring up adoption at your first possible chance - like starting a thread the same day you join and mention it. Make sure to talk about how busy you are so people know you are busy, and assume everyone will flood the thread to decry adoption and "start a debate". Bonus points if you give a pithy response to great advice you will make sure not to follow later in life.
Step 3: regurgitate advice you received a week earlier, as if you have always known it and always act on it.
Step 4a: At your first chance, talk about your never-finished novel Redesigning Eva. Make sure to use a ton of adjectives but don't give any reason that anyone would care. For extra realism, make sure to ignore the advice you were given (and gave out) a month earlier.
Step 4b: People will come to your thread to give you advice instead of asspats. When this happens make up as many excuses as you can. "Draft things out first"? I like to write stream of conscious. "Maybe this can help add things to your story"? I don't know why I'm writing what I write. "Stop being a perfectionist and just write"? I've tried EVERYTHING!!!
Step 5: Talk about your quirks! Make sure it's apparent you want to write something as gritty as Reservoir Dogs but as meandering as Pulp Fiction. Bonus points if you talk about how your dialog isn't even related to your story and it's filled with movie lines lifted verbatim.
Step 6: Talk about your original obsession Alpha Boy. Announce how you've changed and grown, and are now ready to tackle this long-held, much-loved project. If you are Young Connor, make sure Alphaboy is a ripoff of Akira and Superman. Beg people to basically write your stories for you and reiterate just how busy you are coming up with ideas instead of actually writing. For bonus laughs make a main character a Juno insert.
Step 7: When people don't write your stories for you, when you get more advice than asspats, and when no one fights you about adoption or women, you have won at being Connor! Find a new forum and start over at Step 1. Congratulations!
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- Joined
- Nov 14, 2012
I'm not usually someone who cringes while reading shit but good lord those well-intentioned people are trying to help but he's a fucking hopeless dunce.
Like he comes off as moderately intelligent because of his word choice but talking to him for any length of time reveals what a total dipshit he is.
Like he comes off as moderately intelligent because of his word choice but talking to him for any length of time reveals what a total dipshit he is.
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2014
The life cycle of Connor hurt me, him wanting to be in the protagonists shoes while writing the book doesn't make any sense and how can he not know the setting in his own book? Why do you want to be a writer Connor? It's just the idea of being a writer that you like isn't it? You have no skills so you think you'll impress people by telling them you're writing a novel. It doesn't impress people Connor because as soon as you open your mouth or write a paragraph they see that your just a lazy dork with weird obsessions. Get more classes and a job.
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2014
Maybe if Connor is stuck in a room with a dude even more insufferable and pretentious than him, and have that dude not shut the fuck up about his novel he's totally planning to write, he might actually crank out some pages out of just not wanting to be that guy.
Seems to be working for me right now.
Seems to be working for me right now.
- Joined
- Mar 24, 2013
Connor is laboring under the delusion that having a broad vocabulary and regurgitating grandiose words makes him intelligent. It doesn't. He uses his vocabulary as a mask to hide how blatantly unintelligent he is.
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2013
The guy thinks he's Shinji Ikari. He's actually right about that. He needs to grow up and stop whining.
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- Joined
- Jul 22, 2013
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XH 502
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kiwifarms.net
After reading this, I have to say, I don't think Connor really cares about his novel. He keeps saying he loves it, but he won't take any decisive action to bring this decade-long dream to fruition. You can claim to love both this story and writing until you're blue in the face, but what is love without action? It's just a bunch of empty promises.
Connor is not a writer. He doesn't seem to even like writing. He treats it more as a way to give himself and his ideas validation.
- Joined
- Mar 17, 2013
Connor's synopsis of "Redesigning Eva" reminds me very much of a classic Twilight Zone episode entitled "Number 12 Looks Just Like You." The episode is set in a supposedly-ideal future where young men and women undergo plastic and genetic therapy to expand their lifespans and protect them from disease, but they all end looking like a pre-set model (hence, "number 12.") The episode follows a young woman who is about to go through the surgery and expresses doubts about it, but ultimately is operated on against her will and becomes brainwashed into liking the results.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Number_12_Looks_Just_Like_You
Here's a clip.
[youtube]PHuf27fYkRQ[/youtube]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Number_12_Looks_Just_Like_You
Here's a clip.
[youtube]PHuf27fYkRQ[/youtube]
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- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
Its not fair to compare Connor to Joe Cracker, in the last 10 years, Joe has completed two movies, 2 seasons of a web series, at least one comedy cd, a Zelda game using Zelda classic and a number of completed scripts. Joe Cracker is FAR more accomplished than Connor. Let that sink in.
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2014
I also... kind of like Joe?
He's an idiot, he's incompetent, he's in over his head and he has no awareness of it or any idea of what he's doing and his aspirations are ridiculously unrealistic, but I could find myself being in Joe's physical presence and having some laughs... not being repulsed or creeped out. I would party with Joe. He's got the whole the lovable shmuck thing redeeming him.
I don't want to be anywhere near Connor.
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- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
Oh yeah, Joe is a lovable goof to be sure. Connor is just frightening.I also... kind of like Joe?
He's an idiot, he's incompetent, he's in over his head and he has no awareness of it or any idea of what he's doing and his aspirations are ridiculously unrealistic, but I could find myself being in Joe's physical presence and having some laughs... not being completely repulsed or creeped out. I would party with Joe. He's got a little bit of the lovable shmuck thing redeeming him.
I don't want to be anywhere near Connor.