You know you are in for an exceptionally insincere Chantal video when she starts off with a string of doubled up words.
She begins this one: "Hey guys, hey guys, hey. Hi, how are you, how are you? So, I'm finally getting to sit down to do a video for you guys today, for you guys today. And I'm so excited, I'm so excited. Oh my goodness!"
You also know it will be an insincere video when she wears that bright red lipstick.
Her mantra for the first half of the video is "I've been doing better than ever", but also admits that she is off the medication and her "appetite" came back.
The big word of the day is "effort". She has put so much "effort" into doing the right thing this time. You don't know how much "effort" she is putting in this time. She is putting "effort" into healing herself. She's putting "effort" into her life. Her efforts will do more than all the drugs combined. Haters don't understand the "effort" she is putting in.
She also repeatedly talks about how wonderful her life has been, out and about with friends and family, busy as a bee.
"It's not just a magic pill that will cure your eating disorders" Who ever said that it was, Fatso?
As usual, she seeks solutions from quacks on YouTube. "Tips and pointers" (for putting in her own "effort" of course)
Luckily for her, the Quack of the Day's advice is not bad. Essentially the tips and pointers are "get off your fat, lazy ass, and go out and get some exercise in the sunshine. Go to bed at night and sleep." She acts like this is some kind of genius; nobody ever fucking knew this shit before, and now she has a duty to educate us. Thank God for such inspiration. She needs to go on Oprah and tell the masses!
I like after how she denied she was doing keto repeatedly, she now admits to "dabbling" in it, which is a deathfatty's way of saying they were half-assed about it, cherry picking anything they can eat and ignoring what they can't eat.
She also seems to have heard of Omega-3 for the very first time, and has to educate all of us about it, since this is esoteric knowledge.
She used to ruminate over negative comments, but doesn't anymore. (She of course was compelled to block comments just hours later) Look how much the video helped her!
As for the content of her channel segment:
lolol
She's been watching those travel videos where glamorous, sexy couples fly to Hawaii or the Caribbean, rappel down mountains, water-ski in azure waters.
She's gonna do these things with all her friends (she has told us she has so many), but manages to name only the two workhorses, Peetz and Reena (who manages to do about 2 appearances a year in Chantal's videos)
She talks of hiking trails and wild nature and exploring, yet she can't fucking walk 10 yards without gasping and choking and turning red as a beet. These adventures might as well be Everest. The Delusion Monster is back!
She is promising "two, at least two" adventure videos next week. Hardee har har. Adventures with Peetz amounts to sitting on benches and eating greasy food.
The comment chimpout caught me by surprise. I figured for once, she'd bask in the sunny glow of her new plans, but no. She never misses an opportunity to ruin whatever dubious goodwill her videos engender. She is the world's most overgrown three-year-old, and always will be.
Needless to say, this will crash and burn, hopefully in a fireball. We'll get one huffy, puffy video with Peetz that includes a lot of sitting down and eating. And "Travels with Chantal" will go the way of all her other big ideas.
Her absolute inability to be embarrassed by herself is worthy of scientific study. Just one of her cycles would mortify a normal person into making some big changes. Not Chantal. Her life literally careens from mortifying embarrassment to mortifying embarrassment, and she is always back for more. So here we go again.
Last time she sounded this sober, it was the beginning of May, which turned into arguably her lulziest month ever. Things are really looking up now for July.
