- Joined
- Oct 2, 2013
Now I want to write prequels about Holden's hellraising days back in Dublin before he wound up in Redesigning Eva.
حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker
- Thread starter Null
- Start date
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2014
I kind of see this going into a full series of short stories.
Part two is Holden getting into a car chase with the police on the freeway, which end with him driving into the Pacific Ocean.
Part three begins with Holden walking into work soaking wet and carrying an assault rifle, and ends with him fighting off the horde of demons pulled through a portal to hell created by the Prometheus corporation's attempt as a fusion reactor. Said fusion reactor begins working after Holden clears it of demons. For saving Earth from rape demons and salvaging humanity's attempt at a fusion reactor, Holden is offered a $15 Million dollar stake in Prometheus stock, but declines in favor of a $50 dollar Applebee's gift card and a case of whiskey.
Part four is Holden going to pick Eva up from school and remembering that he dumped his car in the Pacific Ocean. He proceeds to jack the Race War Van from the two robbers from the liquor store, pick up Eva, and have a shootout on the freeway between the Whyte Justice Army and a group of SJWs.
I'd write this if I wasn't so lazy.
E
EI 903
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kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2013
Call it "A Portrait of the Autist as a Young Man."
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2013
Can/should we use this thread to write fan-fiction of the connorverse? Because i kind of want to put a piece together exploring the genesis of Klaus Kreiger turning a black man in to a talking ape.
- Joined
- Oct 2, 2013
Go for it. I want this explained, too.
In fact of all the many, many, many confusing narrative decisions in this story, I want to know what led to Barney the Ordely being cast as a literal fucking gorilla.
- Joined
- Jan 3, 2015
I was thinking more along the lines of a psychological horror game starring a disturbed shut-in who never leaves his room.
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2014
People keep telling Connor to get a job and a life, but it kind of lets him affirm that he's worthless without those, and he loves being worthless, it lets him pander for asspats.
Connor, let me tell you, my life isn't a success story like the ones in this thread. I'm in the same boat as you, I'm a worthless shutin NEET with no future and crippling mental disabilities. Except I don't complain about them. You see, the way I see it, I'm lucky to be alive. I should be homeless or dead right now, but like you, our parents let us leech off them. Life is precious to me, I don't care if I'm spending the day writing or programming or drawing or, like you, doing nothing. Every day is a gift. I don't start play Linkin Park - Crawling on loop because I get depressed or think about how I don't have a future or skills. Hell, our lives will probably end the same way, killing ourselves after our parents die. But that kind of ending is exactly why I'm going to appreciate every day of my life. Have you even thought about how you're going to reflect on your life when you're on your deathbed? "It was an awful life, mainly because I hated it. I hated it because I wanted to, and it was awful because of that. Oh well, I wish I could do it over." You really want that to be the last thing you'll think? I sure as hell know I don't.
You're lucky, Connor, as other people have said. You have absolutely no excuse for your constant whining. Your life is excellent, except you choose to see everything wrong with it instead of trying to make the best of it. Instead of saying "I can't do this thing because of my disability", you should say "Because of my disability, I'll do this other thing". Don't look at what you can't do, look at what you can do. And you can't write, so don't look at that.
Sorry if this post was kinda negative, I just think it's disgusting when someone with a good life takes it for granted. Also, try writing a happy story for once, do you know how tryhard your stories sound? Write a children's book, that's probably right up your alley.
Connor, let me tell you, my life isn't a success story like the ones in this thread. I'm in the same boat as you, I'm a worthless shutin NEET with no future and crippling mental disabilities. Except I don't complain about them. You see, the way I see it, I'm lucky to be alive. I should be homeless or dead right now, but like you, our parents let us leech off them. Life is precious to me, I don't care if I'm spending the day writing or programming or drawing or, like you, doing nothing. Every day is a gift. I don't start play Linkin Park - Crawling on loop because I get depressed or think about how I don't have a future or skills. Hell, our lives will probably end the same way, killing ourselves after our parents die. But that kind of ending is exactly why I'm going to appreciate every day of my life. Have you even thought about how you're going to reflect on your life when you're on your deathbed? "It was an awful life, mainly because I hated it. I hated it because I wanted to, and it was awful because of that. Oh well, I wish I could do it over." You really want that to be the last thing you'll think? I sure as hell know I don't.
You're lucky, Connor, as other people have said. You have absolutely no excuse for your constant whining. Your life is excellent, except you choose to see everything wrong with it instead of trying to make the best of it. Instead of saying "I can't do this thing because of my disability", you should say "Because of my disability, I'll do this other thing". Don't look at what you can't do, look at what you can do. And you can't write, so don't look at that.
Sorry if this post was kinda negative, I just think it's disgusting when someone with a good life takes it for granted. Also, try writing a happy story for once, do you know how tryhard your stories sound? Write a children's book, that's probably right up your alley.
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2014
I've actually been wanting to write a fanfiction about Holden and his past that includes, among other things, him being a former member of the PIRA. Now that someone else has written a Holden-fic, I suppose I have no excuse to be lazy.
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2013
It's that time, Kiwis. What we have is finally, finally, the answer to everything Connor is. Wrongplanet has been Connor's home, the site he's been a member of longest. I believe this is because they are much more lenient on wielding the banhammer considering their... unique userbase. Connor is also at his most unfiltered, with other sites we've examined leaving him censored and restrained.
With that said, I want to put a disclaimer for anyone finding this thread: I will not be delving in to anyone else on Wrongplanet. 99% of their userbase are harmless people trying to deal with the bum hand life dealt them gracefully and with support, and they shouldn't be mocked for it. While some of the posters have their quirks, who doesn't? But Connor is a special case with his long running history of making a spectacle of himself online since at least 2009. wow much legacy such postings (edit: there's no a Wrong Planet thread so it turns out I was optimistic about not looking in to other users)
I'll be looking in to this exhausting collection of works chronologically by thread, and this is going to be a long series of parts. I hope you spergs enjoy this half as much as I do!
Connor's first thread explains the genesis of his username and his compassion for other autists.
crawwwwwling in my skiiiiiiiiiin
Redesigning Eva proto-sperging. In all honesty? This idea he has is leaps and bounds better than what his idea is now.
A reoccurring theme is Connor making threads talking about all the things he will never do that no one else ever posts in. Case in point:
Connor preempts the advice everyone has given him because "just writing" is too much work and he's so fucking lazy he can't wiggle his fingers for an hour or he'll get a heart attack.
Connor has some... bizarre fears. The one about Robocop though comes up quite a lot on multiple websites. He was absolutely traumatized by Red Foreman shooting Buckaroo Bonzai
Connor has
lewd thoughts
Hold on to your seats kiwis, because next time we will look at one of Connor's first adoption posts!
With that said, I want to put a disclaimer for anyone finding this thread: I will not be delving in to anyone else on Wrongplanet. 99% of their userbase are harmless people trying to deal with the bum hand life dealt them gracefully and with support, and they shouldn't be mocked for it. While some of the posters have their quirks, who doesn't? But Connor is a special case with his long running history of making a spectacle of himself online since at least 2009. wow much legacy such postings (edit: there's no a Wrong Planet thread so it turns out I was optimistic about not looking in to other users)
I'll be looking in to this exhausting collection of works chronologically by thread, and this is going to be a long series of parts. I hope you spergs enjoy this half as much as I do!
Connor's first thread explains the genesis of his username and his compassion for other autists.
crawwwwwling in my skiiiiiiiiiin
Redesigning Eva proto-sperging. In all honesty? This idea he has is leaps and bounds better than what his idea is now.
Okay, I'm going to take my unfunny and caustic rants and throw them in spoilers so people can ignore them. This is the first instance of Redesigning Eva I have been able to find, from five years ago. Let that sink in - this idea has been kicking around Connor's head for five years, and has shifted from John Hughes Bladerunner to Silence of the Lambs. But this single thread can teach us much about Connor when you compare it to the shit he has said over the years, even as recently as a few months ago.
First, I gotta give props for his story evolving and changing. As an amateur writer myself I know how hard it is to take something you love and revise it. So Connor being willing to change his story from what is listed here to the story he has no is, without any sarcasm, really good.
But in 2009 Connor had no idea why his protagonist was even in the story. "Why, you ask? Beats me". I'm chalking this up to autism and nothing else, because by his own admission Connor had only seen two movies Molly Ringwald had been in. She's his Sonic.
It's apparent that Connor wanted to make movies but finally decided that would never happen. Redesigning Eva started as a screenplay for God's sake! That's why he litters his writing with film effects, because everything he writes is just a screenplay in the making based off of things he either recently watched or is obsessed with.
Redesigning Eva is also an entirely personal project to Connor because this is his way to beat his Autism. This work is personal to him, a way to attack a disability he suffers from, to fight it, and ultimately to best it and the Mephistopheles that tempted him.
Even as far back as 5 years ago, people around Connor were telling him, "Stop fucking talking about writing and just do it!". I mean, both his dad and his therapist said it! People on every forum he has joined has said it. People in this very thread have said it. But "doing" means failure and Connor is crippled by the idea of failure, so he would rather put off doing anything to save himself the heartache of not being good at it.
First, I gotta give props for his story evolving and changing. As an amateur writer myself I know how hard it is to take something you love and revise it. So Connor being willing to change his story from what is listed here to the story he has no is, without any sarcasm, really good.
But in 2009 Connor had no idea why his protagonist was even in the story. "Why, you ask? Beats me". I'm chalking this up to autism and nothing else, because by his own admission Connor had only seen two movies Molly Ringwald had been in. She's his Sonic.
It's apparent that Connor wanted to make movies but finally decided that would never happen. Redesigning Eva started as a screenplay for God's sake! That's why he litters his writing with film effects, because everything he writes is just a screenplay in the making based off of things he either recently watched or is obsessed with.
Redesigning Eva is also an entirely personal project to Connor because this is his way to beat his Autism. This work is personal to him, a way to attack a disability he suffers from, to fight it, and ultimately to best it and the Mephistopheles that tempted him.
Even as far back as 5 years ago, people around Connor were telling him, "Stop fucking talking about writing and just do it!". I mean, both his dad and his therapist said it! People on every forum he has joined has said it. People in this very thread have said it. But "doing" means failure and Connor is crippled by the idea of failure, so he would rather put off doing anything to save himself the heartache of not being good at it.
A reoccurring theme is Connor making threads talking about all the things he will never do that no one else ever posts in. Case in point:
Connor preempts the advice everyone has given him because "just writing" is too much work and he's so fucking lazy he can't wiggle his fingers for an hour or he'll get a heart attack.
Connor has some... bizarre fears. The one about Robocop though comes up quite a lot on multiple websites. He was absolutely traumatized by Red Foreman shooting Buckaroo Bonzai
Connor has
lewd thoughts Hold on to your seats kiwis, because next time we will look at one of Connor's first adoption posts!
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- Joined
- Oct 2, 2013
I like this. Young political Irishman cooking up chemicals for a fringe terrorist group, his mates throw him under a bus, he's caught, it looks like he's about to be buried under the jail...then a charismatic American businessman makes the whole thing go away. Now he's working for peanuts as the pet scientist for the Prometheus Corporation. If he comes forward with the company's more unethical experiments (like genetically modifying black orderlies into talking gorillas and using a serial killer as a medical consultant), not only does someone makes a telephone call back to the old country to clue all his resentful former friends, not to mention the government, where he's been hiding for the past twenty years, they take his emotionally unstable daughter for a human guinea pig. Now he's got to find a way out.
I love it. Have your people call my people; we'll do lunch.
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2014
Oh my god, Connor is gay for Shinji. Thats fucking hilarious.
- Joined
- Jan 3, 2015
2897 posts, 1.37 per day over 5 years. That's more effort than he's put into Redesigning Eva.
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2013
Please don't touch Rocky Horror or Phantom of the Paradise, Connor.
- Joined
- Oct 2, 2013
I think they're safe. They're not grimdark enough.
- Joined
- Jul 11, 2014
Because it turned out so well for the Librarian of Unseen University?
Granted, he was an orangutan, but still.
- Joined
- May 27, 2013
So put in any thought since I last addressed you? If you really are 19, you better work on it, and fast.
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2013
Was this in the thread, or in TeamSpeak?
- Joined
- May 27, 2013
I don't even know what that is. I'd only address you in the forums. I don't even use the chat really.
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2013
I've looked through your post history. You mentioned physical exercise, yes?I don't even know what that is. I'd only address you in the forums. I don't even use the chat really.