DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[Haunter]

I forgot we had the "The "Is Kat Pregnant" speculation thread" thread. More pregnancy speculation can just go there

 

[Mask_de_SMITH]

Got caught up with DSP shenanigans on DSP Archive's Twitter, and holy fuck, when did Phil get so fucking pussy whipped? He's trying to make himself out to be this happily married, completely changed man who now suddenly has this weird aversion to video game characters entering relationships and sexual content in games. Kat must be putting him on one hell of a leash, because I don't remember him being this way when he was with Leanna, but it looks like the horse is pulling the rider by the reins this time.

Also, he says he doesn't need to have characters enter in relationships or play games with sexual khantent in them because he's married. But how does that explain his little "accident"? He was dating Leanna well before their break-up when he was caught beating his meat, but I guess now that he's with his Soulmaid, he's a changed man? Yeah, okay.

Again, I really do believe that the only reason he's taking this stance is because he doesn't want to do the dating sub quests in Judgment (and really any other game with romance options) and just wants to skip it and finish the game. Does this autistic know that it's the character entering into the relationship and not him? This man continues to baffle me to no end...

 

[samovski]

Got caught up with DSP shenanigans on DSP Archive's Twitter, and holy fuck, when did Phil get so fucking pussy whipped? He's trying to make himself out to be this happily married, completely changed man who now suddenly has this weird aversion to video game characters entering relationships and sexual content in games. Kat must be putting him on one hell of a leash, because I don't remember him being this way when he was with Leanna, but it looks like the horse is pulling the rider by the reins this time.

Also, he says he doesn't need to have characters enter in relationships or play games with sexual khantent in them because he's married. But how does that explain his little "accident"? He was dating Leanna well before their break-up when he was caught beating his meat, but I guess now that he's with his Soulmaid, he's a changed man? Yeah, okay.

Again, I really do believe that the only reason he's taking this stance is because he doesn't want to do the dating sub quests in Judgment (and really any other game with romance options) and just wants to skip it and finish the game. Does this autistic know that it's the character entering into the relationship and not him? This man continues to baffle me to no end...

I agree, I think it's just a way for him to finish games faster than usual. I can't see Kat giving a single fuck about pixel waifus, and he clearly doesn't have a problem with them if you watch his behavior when any woman in any game enters the scene. Every single time I've seen it happen the 1st thing out his mouth is always, always something to do with her tits. And it goes on and on and on for fucking ages. Like a pent up neanderthal who's just seen curves for the 1st time, the brain just can't handle it.

But now he's too mature for it? Sure Dave, sure you are. Nothing to do with the fact you're trapped playing games you hate and have no interest in for perpetuity or anything. No, you're too mature for it.

Faggot.

 

[Nigel of Ukip]

Not strictly on-topic, but I just found out that the first 737 Max 8 plane was called the "Spirit of Renton". How appropriate for a plane that literally had bugged mechanics.

Let me play along.

Phil loves Kat, Kat is a horse.
The farm where Mr Hands got fucked to death by a horse is located around Seattle WA.
So A retard died by getting fucked by a horse, while another retard is fucking a horse. Must be something in that Seattle air Dave is always on about.

 

[LeeSydePanda]

I wish his bald spot showed in that pic tbh.

Gotchu fam

 

[Pubic Enemy #1]

I wonder if Phil's "I don't need a waifu" spergout extends to other stuff, too. Will he not play games where the romance subplot is a mandatory part of the storyline, like in Uncharted? If Nathan Drake's wife is dangling over a piranha pool or some shit, will he just refuse to save her because "I have a wife, stoopid! Why would I want to save someone else's?!"

Does it extend to other media, too? Will he just refuse to watch the bit in Star Wars where Han and Leia get together? I mean, he already claims he refuses to watch porn because of the same issue.

Phil's so desperate to show how uWu so faithfulllll he is to Kat that I'd swear she was his first girlfriend if I didn't know better. Phil might have had sex, but he'll always be a virgin.

 

[Cyber Bowling]

I wonder if Phil's "I don't need a waifu" spergout extends to other stuff, too. Will he not play games where the romance subplot is a mandatory part of the storyline, like in Uncharted? If Nathan Drake's wife is dangling over a piranha pool or some shit, will he just refuse to save her because "I have a wife, stoopid! Why would I want to save someone else's?!"

Does it extend to other media, too? Will he just refuse to watch the bit in Star Wars where Han and Leia get together? I mean, he already claims he refuses to watch porn because of the same issue.

Phil's so desperate to show how uWu so faithfulllll he is to Kat that I'd swear she was his first girlfriend if I didn't know better. Phil might have had sex, but he'll always be a virgin.

If I had to guess, it has everything to do with Phil bragging about how he's such a mature adult. In Phil's mind, success/maturity is just like his gaming achievements. He failed the wedding chevo with Leanna, but he managed to get it with Kat. Phil is so insecure he doesn't want anyone thinking he's a nerdy loser because his world view is largely shaped by old movies/tv shows where those nerdy characters would be mocked for having virtual girlfriends. Given how little investment Phil has in any of his games, I can't even see someone jumping to that conclusion. It's basically the same reason why he won't move back to his CT condo, or even try to downgrade at all. He has the gout mansion adult chevo, so if he was forced to move, he'd lose his trophy points.

I'd be surprised if Kat was behind the scenes complaining about Phil doing romance stuff, in no small part because I don't think for a second Kat actually watches his content. It also doesn't add up because unless I'm mistaken, Phil used that as an excuse to avoid those sidequests at all, so unless Kat decided to put in some weird non video game dating clause into their wedding vows I can't see how it'd be an issue.

As others posted, general laziness is probably part of it too. Yakuza games are filled with tons of side content and it sounds like a series Phil was never particularly invested in, so I imagine he's just trying to rush through everything as quickly as possible once he realized this wasn't the newest release that was finally going to put him back on the top. Wasn't he falling asleep during the cutscenes, or was that Yakuza 6?

 

[Leon Breitling]

-snip-

DSP comparing the dating stuff in Judgement to dating sims is laughable. I also wonder if he's avoiding it because two of the potential "girlfriends" are half the characters age...and the main character is 35.

Unlikely, because that'd mean he'd have to have paid attention to fucking anything in the game's story.

 

[Fuckyoudad]

TL;DR Phil is indeed one boring bastard.


Since any successful business runs on a current of creativity is it any wonder that Phil's business model in 2019 is measured on the strength of each subsequent failure and it's only in those fuck ups that DecrepitSydeFil is briefly reanimated to react to the discomfort that is his existence before becoming loveseat mulch again. Between these moments you get next to nothing worth bothering about.. you'll only hang around if you're hardcore in either camp.
He's become so indignant and lazy that his material is only as good as what's provided to him. He won't extend himself because he knows he doesn't have to.. plus he can't cuz it could trigger a back spasm dood. He's gone beyond ahnest reactionary khammentary videogame slob to relying on a virtual soup kitchen to write about 80% the show for him. Beyond what's offered up to react to in real time all he's concerned about is being cloak and dagger (more like ack and beggar) about his special behind the scenes nuts in a vice relationship and muh munneh woes.

If DSP's streams were actually reliant on DSP himself being the creative force as author of the "work" the ongoing scamathon would wilt and wither away in a month just like his houseplant. He truly wouldn't be where he is today without the support of a few scant, gilded and exceptional fans. Even moreso the "support" of his most ardent detractors. They meme all over il porco and for all the accusations that he lacks self-awareness, he absolutely knows he needs it to continue because selective harassment rebuttal is now his boring bread and butter since he's positively sickened himself off the hobby you could once claim he at least halfway enjoyed.

If you consider the fact that Phil Burnell is incapable of getting through one single day without making a fool of himself, forever adding to the digital scrapbook of his miserable life it becomes obvious that he accentuates his natural born stupidity for the sake of giving the peepul more shit to laugh at. IMO the sperg outs about videogame romance and waifus are simply the latest incarnation of giving detractors something to clip and quote him on. He's Mr minimum effort so he can only react to what's put in front of him.. it's as though he thinks of nothing else at all in the universe outside his tiny bubble. It's his ahnest views though it's not a 180 switch at all on how he regarded videogame tiddies for the better part of 8 years.

He has no opinion on anything of any real importance, the mature adult instead chooses to get riled up about squeaky clean twitch approved non-issues like youtube kahpyright criminal activity and dating minigames in 2019. Ask him about how many genders he believes exist or muslims or immigration policy and see how far he'll take you.. he'll manage to veer off road into a ditch about pink haired ass kissing shill streamers taking all baby's 12 hour work day bits and you won't know how in the fuck he arrived there.. musta been a back spasm coupled with not wearing those prescription lenses.

I don't believe any of this really makes him any kind of sly conman but chat aught to hold out on him for a week financially and topically.. stop trolling and baiting him for an extended period and you'll expose how barren that mind of his truly is and how "DSP is a boring worthless human " is the king of hate of understatements.

 

[clownpiss]

 

[Nigel of Ukip]

If WE hit a SUPPORT goal I'll do a HUGE positive reveal.
How utterly pathetic, but it will work he will get extra support.
CT Condo, the Kat is preggo or he's getting a cat.
Either way, if he fucks it up like with his wedding he could mess things up for himself.

 

[huffysan]

See it be something stupid, like new emote slots or new pre-stream background.

 

[Fuckyoudad]

Katherine is either legitimately out of her mind in marrying a man who's sitting on $100k+ worth of debt

or

Phil hasn't been completely ahnest with Katherine about how much financial trouble he's actually in

Which seems more likely? Better just to assume she's a lunatic and he's lying to her as well?

 

[JackDavis]

Damn, we get it.
You're a vegan. You vape. You find DSP boring.

 

[Vic Viper T301]

You guys know Kat, uh, my wife? Well she met someone who is going to help us out! His name is Jim and he's going to be moving in to help defray my cost of living! I guess it's called a 'triad?' I don't know about this stuff! Huh huh! Uh, to the idiot that just tipped me a dollar, uh no, you don't know what you're talking about! First of all, I never said we couldn't get another roommate, OK, that's number one. Number twooooo, uh, it's not a roomate OK, it's a TRIAD. So there you go. Stupid.

 

[PieceofShet]

And if not?
"guys... I really wanted to tell you the good news, but we did not reach the 25000dollar goal."

This is beyond pathetic.

 

[samovski]

I don't believe any of this really makes him any kind of sly conman but chat aught to hold out on him for a week financially and topically.. stop trolling and baiting him for an extended period and you'll expose how barren that mind of his truly is and how "DSP is a boring worthless human " is the king of hate of understatements.

I would love to see this happen. Chat just talking to each other, not a single donation for an entire week. I guarantee you would a descent into madness far more quickly and far more funny than even The Shining. It would be glorious to watch as each hour passes without interaction or monetary gain how desperate he becomes. I genuinely think by the half-way point he'd be on his knees offering blowjobs for $5.

 

[Marsaudiac]

No matter how positive it is, the announcement will only be a means for him to try to convince his audience they owe him money. First he makes the announcement itself a stretch goal, but then whatever it ends up being will just end up itself being a sort of financial goal. He really is turning findom into a science.

 

[ReentryPhantom]

"WE DID IT GUYS, WE HIT THE $2000 GOAL!. THE PAHSITIVE REVEAL IS, THAT AMOUNT JUST HELPED ME PAY OFF MY TAX PAYMENT FOR THIS THREE-MONTH PERIOD! PRETTY COOL, RIGHT?"

 

[Meech]

So the big announcement is that if he gets paid enough he will make the real announcement?