Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[Whatthefuck]

lol, a long time ago, Amberlynn once said that Bora Bora was in, around, or near the Poconos or something. I can't remember if if she said it on accident, but it was one of her most hilarious explosions of stupidity.

That explains it. Bless her fat congested heart. I'm going with explosion of stupidity.

 

[SituationTypeThing]

Time out, Bora Bora is way further than the Poconos. It's in French Polynesia like Tahiti way. I'm not sure how she ever heard of Bora Bora, but here we are. I think she could actually make it to the Poconos because they could likely drive that. Bora Bora is flight only unless she wants to go full Moana on us. I'd be down for that. Either way, it's a ridiculous thing for her to talk about. She can't even go to Lexington anymore with our major swelleeeeeeen. She'd die before the plane landed in Bora Bora. Also, why would she want to go to an island? She'd wear those horrible legeeeeeens and whatever t-shirt tent that fit. She'd probably try to take Twinkie Stoooorr and end up losing her to a shark. As apropos as it would be for our whale to find salt water please don't forget she needs that pH balance correct, boo boo, of she's going to have heart burn.

In a younow Q&A with Sharla a few years ago, she said the two places she wanted to go were Bora Bora and the Poconos. Then she asked Sharla if she'd ever heard of the Poconos, sharla said no (surprise!), and amber told her "It's IN THE BAHAMAS!!!!!" (she might have said it's in the Caribbean) and went on to describe over-water huts and things. I have no idea where she thinks Bora Bora is, but I'm pretty sure it's as incorrect as her understanding of what/where the poconos is.

 

[mekalekahi]

Amber thrives off of gordita crunches and attention. She will either announce that she is stopping 100 days of filming and come back 3 days later or she will disappear for 2 weeks like she did before that sausage mukbang where her brain short circuted when rairity disrupted her. She loves going silent and seeing people ask where she is and speculate, then after 2 weeks she posts a Snapchat selfie at a resturant table with mouse ears and a caption that says "whatever you say boo boo" or some dumb shit. Shes so predictable

 

[THEY’RE CODEPENDANT]

Unpopular opinion:
I actually want Amber to lose a significant amount of weight
She would get a huge confidence boost and finally dump Becky, probably move to her own place, go out more, maybe get some friends and a new girlfriend
We would get much more hilarious content and new characters to discuss about
Amber would probably feel like a weight loss YouTube STAAWR and get really sassy and bitchy about it
I don't even want her to get fatter anymore, cause that just means that we will have an inactive thread in a couple of years and a dead cow. A legendary dead cow. But no more m*lk.

Idk if I would even say this is an unpopular opinion. I think deep down a lot of us don’t exactly enjoy seeing someone so obviously suffer despite her being an insufferable cunt, it’s just that our hopes for this expired tuna can cunt have been crushed by non other than the gorl herself over and over and over again. That old saying; the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over again and expecting different results, applies here so perfectly because that is what ALL of this is. If we were to keep praying for this girl we’d drive ourselves mad. Amberlynn doesn’t have the mental fortitude to think such a way because she is actually crazy, so she’ll try every diet she finds on Pinterest without realizing she’s doomed. What I find so strange is that she truly believes that she is totally sane and doesn’t see how her reality resembles a horrible fever dream.
I also don’t think Amber will break up with Becky, at least not for a while because Amber has a ball manipulating people and having a robot (well robot might not be the right word, robots are somewhat intelligent) to do whatever she wants and believe whatever she says. (Edit: grammar sorry)

However I think Amber does see that she is totally fucked, but admitting that means we all win. The only thing worse to Amber than being in denial of her mortality is facing it. Those times that Amber has admitted she is in trouble was a remarkable amount of vulnerability coming from her but even so she had to cover it up with excuses to savor her pride. She’s bored, she’s lonely and she’s ashamed of herself and it’s just easier for her to eat her pain and insulate her weak willed heart. She’s pathetic, but admitting that to people means she loses, and we all know how stubborn and obsessed with herself she is.

In my opinion she is the worst kind of person. She’s one of those girls who is a venomous, toxic snake and pretends to be the poor helpless mouse who preaches “positivity and good vibes only!!!” Even when you can feel their negativity charge the air the second the walk into the room. Though she is exceptionally stupid, I would bet my life she knows how terrible she is and that’s why she has to scream constant reminders of how much of a “good person” she is. That’s what those people always do.

She reminds me of a girl I used to work with. She’s about just as tall, but weighs a little less than ALR. She’s a pathological liar, talks about her diet every second she gets the chance and had crystals set around her desk to promote good vibes, all the while reporting skinny girls to HR because she is concerned they’re starving themselves. “Guys want girls with meat on their bones! I’m just looking out for you, I love you girl!” And talks constant shit online. Just absolutely miserable.
(This is just an aside on this girl but she has basically the same arms as ALR and HR gets constant complaints that she smells like she shit herself because she can’t wipe properly. She also got stuck in her chair once and yelled when someone tried to help her out, AND started crying when her chips got stuck in the vending machine and left multiple sticky notes to have it fixed and give her a dollar refund and her chips.)
Edit: grammar

 

[Silver Surfer]

Can someone give me an update on like the last 3 weeks of Amber’s BS? I got behind.

 

[Pog Mathoin]

So is the promised vlog on the 31st going to be an admission that she's hit 600 pounds which is why she says people are going to be mad at her? I mean we all know she's there, and with the delay in uploading I suspect she probably reached it several weeks ago. The appointment with the weightloss doctor will have triggered the Binge Monster big time and she's been stacking on the weight over the last month. From what I can tell, she's moving back into stage one of her futility cycle, and we all know our gorl loves a fresh start and a new starting weight. I'm expecting September 1st to be a "DAY 1 of a NEW ME" vlog. The best part of it all is that she will continue eating like a manic hog until the 31st, so my money is on 611 pounds.

 

[Botched Tit Job]

My guess: 8/31 she'll announce she is no longer sharing her weight or diet on YouTube. Again. For the 10th time.

 

[Hecate14]

I know this has been re-hashed thousands of times, so I apologize, but how can Amber wake up every morning (afternoon, lezbereal) and face the existence of being her? That body? How has she not ended it? How can you experience any genuine moments of happiness in your life when you are a literal behemoth. Once again, apologies I know this has been discussed billions of times, it still astounds me though.

 

[THOTto]

My sister is a fat gorl. She's the most cocky arrogant little cunt I've ever met. She always has to be right if you dare try to say actually you're wrong because of x... she accuses you of acting like you know everything. She reminds me so much of Amber . In fact thinking about it they're really alike. She stopped seeing a therapist because she didn't like being told she has issues rather than other people being the issue. She claimed she was on anti anxiety tablets then stopped 3 weeks later because she was miraculously cured.

You and your sister should neck yourselves and make sure your bloodline ends with you. It’ll only make the world a better place.

Lol, “These people are OBSESSED with me. Let me just obsessively name every place I’m talked about online but I DON’T read there.”
Is she gonna say a fan linked her to the subreddit now? After all her dm’s must just be full of support and outrage that someone would dare critique such a lovely princess.

 

[DelicateMageflower]

I know this has been re-hashed thousands of times, so I apologize, but how can Amber wake up every morning (afternoon, lezbereal) and face the existence of being her? That body? How has she not ended it? How can you experience any genuine moments of happiness in your life when you are a literal behemoth. Once again, apologies I know this has been discussed billions of times, it still astounds me though.

She doesn't really know any other way of living. To her, this is just fine, and as long as she has the shekels coming in for journals, crappy YA novels, and orange chicken, all is right in the world. Well, until she drops dead before 35.

Also, long time lurker, first time poster. Nice to meet all of you.

 

[SituationTypeThing]

Nobody is forcing amber to chase the hate. It's not like she has to read all the KF updates as some sort of toll before she uploads a new yt video. If hate stresses her out so much, and uploading her non-life to youtube makes her so happy, she can do one without acknowledging the other.

(really, she'd cry fat tears if the hate groups, the subreddits, the reaction videos went away. The attention gives her life)

 

[Snusmumriken]

Can someone give me an update on like the last 3 weeks of Amber’s BS? I got behind.

Hauls. Random “ASMR” videos. More hauls. Clickbait titles where she just talks about random bullshit and mispronounces things to be cute. More hauls. Makeup tutorials. She went on a “staycation” for a little bit which was kind of funny and I’d check out the threads for those videos if I were you. Hauls again after that. Eric set up a pool??? No one cares, we don’t get to see her layygs so skip it.

You aren’t behind. She’s in the same place as when you stopped watching, just 100 pounds on top of that.

 

[Fupacabra]

Can someone give me an update on like the last 3 weeks of Amber’s BS? I got behind.

She's still a buttergolem cunt that has sawdust for brains and beetus paws for hands. So not much has changed.

 

[raritycunt]

Cuntylynn and the Instagram Q&A is back at it again folks! Today’s specialty is an extra side of cuntyness served on a bed of arrogance

 

[marjoram]

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Cuntylynn and the Instagram Q&A is back at it again folks! Today’s specialty is an extra side of cuntyness served on a bed of arrogance

Wellll, that leaves Big Al out, now doesn't it??
A more thoroughly uneducated beast I've never seen....
Know why you get "hate", Big Al?
Go on, take a guess.....moron

ETA: Oh fuck...now she's gonna be using "high cortisol" to explain away her hugeness and everything else that's wrong with her---"But all my stress doe"......

 

[Chía P.]

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Cuntylynn and the Instagram Q&A is back at it again folks! Today’s specialty is an extra side of cuntyness served on a bed of arrogance

The bitch said, not long ago, that her hump was calcification lol

 

[LightEmittingDiode]

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Cuntylynn and the Instagram Q&A is back at it again folks! Today’s specialty is an extra side of cuntyness served on a bed of arrogance

Ah yes, this perfectly explains why her massive body has run out of places to deposit fat and she has developed a huge fat hump on her back.
“Muh cortisol y’all”

 

[mekalekahi]

Where are your friends and family?

 

[StrawberryDouche]

We get it Amber. You got your underdunce degree from Stupid U and you're doing your PhDuh at the University of Idiotopolis and we're not. No need to rub it in. We ain't got that fancy education you have so when we see something filled with fat, us unlettered peasants thinks it's because ye fat and ye eat too much!

Is the hump filled with cortisol? How does it get in there? Is there a fillin' plug where ya take the cork out? Can ye order it off them magic delivery tubes that run straight to yer door? Once you pour the cortisol in, how are ya supposed ta get it out?! Do you need a special hand crank to pump it out?

Thank you for using your precious time to educate us. I know you have a lot to do with the fillin' and the pumpin' and yer post-grad studies.

 

[THOTto]

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Cuntylynn and the Instagram Q&A is back at it again folks! Today’s specialty is an extra side of cuntyness served on a bed of arrogance

Humpty dumbty, wasn’t that tall
Humpty dumbty, had no one to call
Everyone ran, and everyone hid
Fearing her screeching, and fat at her mid (section)

Pacing is off but you get the idea. Not gonna lie I wanna stab it and see what comes out. I have theories but I’ll spare you guys this time.