Community Munchausen's by Internet (Malingerers, Munchies, Spoonies, etc) - Feigning Illnesses for Attention

[Chronicshillcow]

Special report just in. No one needs any more shit about service dogs, or ESAs shoved down their throats. Further discussion of these creatures will give this whole thread GP or rumination syndrome or both. We all feel bad for the pet dogs that are inappropriately in public. Will the lost Redditers please stop posting to this thread like it’s the last Twinkie left on earth after the apocalypse; we can only hope it (the apocalypse) is coming soon.

Back to your regularly scheduled programming. Now for the munchie weather. There’s a strong wind blowing in from JanJan’s health insurance is likely doing a fraud investigation. I predict 100% chance of her dfe when the market for insurance plans opens back up. But that’d require intelligence so here’s to hoping those last three brain cells she has are still functioning

How the hell is JanJan still alive without any of medication or doctors for months? That’s a baffling question this reporter would feature in a new special segment but we all know she didn’t need any of that shit to begin with so why bother.
This has been Munchie news stay tuned next for some pearl clutching Replies.

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

Why the fuck would you post this online? "I'm too lazy to clean myself lol you feel me fellow #spooniewarriors?"

 

[dopedodo]

I would love to see autie's ass fall the ground when she attempted to put her leg over the cane. "Dance like no ones watching" shouldn't be videotaped.

This is what boils my piss so much. What Autie is doing here is dancing. It's improvised, and it's shit, but it's dancing. Stimming is not dancing, stimming happens almost unconsciously for most autistic people as a kind of emotional regulation/self soothing and is a repetitive movement/noise, not a fucking interpretive dance show.

No, no. They get away with it because people don't care.

Seems like the only people who care are those with service dogs themselves, "real" or otherwise. So many sketchy SD handlers post frequently about how their "angel who saves my life ten times a day was attacked by a vicious fake SD" (with of course no way to prove it was a fake) that I've started imagining any two SD handlers in the same store as a sort of cowboy showdown, both waiting for the other to slip up and their dog to shit on the floor or something.


Edit: Does Kat (Barfiedoll) have a compression sleeve on one arm??

 

[Cold Waffle]

Edit: Does Kat (Barfiedoll) have a compression sleeve on one arm??

Yep. She calls them her "picc sleeves." Probably can't get her old collection of sleeves to fit over her ham arms anymore, so she's resorted to ordering a selection of full-length arm sleeves. I'm waiting for her to discover those classy sleeves that kids wear so they look like they have a sleeve tattoo.

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

This bitch and her shit-eating grin. Tl;dr: claims her port moved only weeks after being inserted, she got PTSD because the mean awful doctor hurt her with contrast when they went to see why she couldn't access it easily. She had the port removed and is back to peripheral IVs for her life-saving salt water but will have a new port in a few days. Almost every photo of her since she got the damn thing is her hooked up to saline with this same insane smile on her face. And yes, this exceptional individual named her fucking port.

 

[dopedodo]

I can't get past the Jaquie level of emoji abuse.

 

[Ms.bojangles]

Special report just in. No one needs any more shit about service dogs, or ESAs shoved down their throats. Further discussion of these creatures will give this whole thread GP or rumination syndrome or both. We all feel bad for the pet dogs that are inappropriately in public. Will the lost Redditers please stop posting to this thread like it’s the last Twinkie left on earth after the apocalypse; we can only hope it (the apocalypse) is coming soon.

Thank you! I didn't know we all of a sudden became a service dog support and info group .

All of our #spooniewarriors have been so lame lately. I've been gathering info on a cow that could be fun, she has in the past done the same but deleted everything and for the most part went away from the m.ilking the internet for money with her woe is me stories but recently she's amped back up and seemed to add munchausens by proxy to the list. If anyone knows h..elen..a the wanna be model.

Edit. I'm dying I didn't know they edited m.ilking to that

 

[Cold Waffle]

All of our #spooniewarriors have been so lame lately. I've been gathering info on a cow that could be fun, she has in the past done the same but deleted everything and for the most part went away from the m.ilking the internet for money with her woe is me stories but recently she's amped back up and seemed to add munchausens by proxy to the list. If anyone knows h..elen..a the wanna be model.

Edit. I'm dying I didn't know they edited m.ilking to that

I found her blog and it looks like Munchausens by Proxy could definitely be in play. She explains the "symptoms" her toddler exhibits that qualify her for a Chiari diagnosis:

She has sensory issues , cries for sometimes hours , Sometimes she wants to dress up or other times she screams as fabric even touches her , sometimes takes zero naps or sometimes sleeps all day. Some days she doesn’t want to play & other days that’s all she wants to do.

I wonder if she realizes that two-year-olds are like the screeching octopus of the childhood development timeline, and everything she mentioned is a behavior that toddlers do. They're holy terrors that defy logic.

 

[dopedodo]

I found her blog and it looks like Munchausens by Proxy could definitely be in play. She explains the "symptoms" her toddler exhibits that qualify her for a Chiari diagnosis:

I wonder if she realizes that two-year-olds are like the screeching octopus of the childhood development timeline, and everything she mentioned is a behavior that toddlers do. They're holy terrors that defy logic.

MBP or projecting her own hypochondria? Keep an eye out for mystery hospital admissions.

 

[Cold Waffle]

MBP or projecting her own hypochondria? Keep an eye out for mystery hospital admissions.

She's posting about it on the internet via several outlets. Due to the attention-seeking factor alone, I'd wager MBP over projected hypochondria.

I see precisely one photo of her husband on Instagram, and her blog just mentions that she's a military spouse. Is this one of those situations where the dad isn't home much, leaving mom to seek attention (military spouse, chronically ill, caring for two ill children)?

 

[dopedodo]

She's posting about it on the internet via several outlets. Due to the attention-seeking factor alone, I'd wager MBP over projected hypochondria.

I see precisely one photo of her husband on Instagram, and her blog just mentions that she's a military spouse. Is this one of those situations where the dad isn't home much, leaving mom to seek attention (military spouse, chronically ill, caring for two ill children)?

Oh god he's going to be like Judd isn't he? He'll come back after 8 months and they'll all be in neck collars with ports and feeding tubes and a successful YouTube channel.

 

[PootPoot2]

Since I rarely bother with the Reddit, I popped in to see why there’s been such a mass exodus. I understand all the asylum seekers now.

Spoiler: WTF

May I suggest all future SD debates be referred to #DyingJessi for resolution? She is a recognized expert you know.

In case you were concerned, #DyingJessi is still dying. See?

Spoiler: Much Dying So Jessi

Like all munchies, DJ can’t stay off her socials long & definitely can’t stand to be alone. She’s been making up for lost Instagram time, buckle up, this is a long update.

Everyone around her, from GCH™ Elliot to her fucking dog, is getting tired of DJ. Her “posse” took an overnight break & DJ had a minor breakdown. Even she can’t stand to endure her own company for long.

• DJ’s posse includes her wheelchair
• There are 6 nurses caring for you, DJ, because you’re what we call a “rotational room.” A patient so damn exhausting to deal with that every nurse on shift rotates time dealing with your behavioral bullshit so no single individual is overburdened emotionally
• Atlas, an actual dog, is more capable of identifying DJ’s super special non-temporal lobe photosensitive epileptic seizures than anyone staffed at this prestigious hospital
• Still tagging #Undiagnosed...

But praise be! Medical science has accomplished what it should in spite of her complexity & DJ is getting better! Maybe this isn’t a munchie after all?



ALACK ALAS! Just like DJ predicted, life got funny & discharge is delayed. Suffering from acute hypoattention, DJ engineered more hospital time for herself—well, Elliot & doggo too. They are all homeless. She’s actually an excellent provider now that I think about it.


Better not stop the 24hr feeds or this junior ham planet might lose some of her gravitational pull; Elliot or Atlas might escape orbit. Of course DJ wrote a book about how a doctor, probably making a clinical comment based on her CMP & looking to get consent for withdrawal of treatment, was actually just calling her a fatty fatty boombalatty.


Before DJ added her wheelchair to her posse, she was an average weight. A normal path would’ve kept DJ a normal weight, especially walking her normal dog as we see in this throwback post (2017):


Maybe when that store manager insulted her for needing a service dog, a thing that absolutely happened, it triggered DJ to race even faster off a normal path to prove to that rando just how sick she is. **Plus eleven munchie points for making an IG post in the voice of her SD.**

Back in the present, DJ shows how serious she was with that “I guess I live here now.” Holy shit this room is disgusting, I’d be in full contact precautions on entry & slather antibacterial up to my elbows at exit.


BTW, it’s basic respect to NOT post candid photos wherein your care team can be identified without their consent. There’s a reasonable expectation of privacy in our profession. We don’t post candid pictures of you shitting yourself, please don’t post candid pictures of us cleaning it up ya know? Dang. Anyway. Look at all the pop & junk food on that bedside... no wonder her tummy aches. Also, that’s your FIL’s crotch Atlas is snuggling into, not his feet. Just sayin’. Bonus crazy—this commenter:


UCSF is a profitable & well-respected institution. Hard to imagine them taking in a patient requiring acute treatment to prolong life against a rare but reversible condition like CAEBV/HLH for a secondary issue, then recommending discharge over internal transfer. Thank goodness for Hashtag Undiagnosed to pay the rent, amirite?

DJ said previously that they’ve already blown through their GFM (about $30k). Stay tuned for the fall blockbuster, DyingJessi GFM2: Die Harder I s’pose.

PS: fuck it, weather killed my vacation so hard I actually have to sleep at work & scrolling back through DJ’s timeline was such a trip I’m gonna figure out a timeline for this stupid bint after all. A casual revisit of her earlier IG posts alone reminded me of all the harrowing tales of medicaid denials & interstate doctor shopping, claims like 5 anaphylactic episodes in less than 12hrs, & a personal favorite:




She vomited & pissed herself to try & impress this poor doctor

...who then her home to her “carefully controlled room” because she recognized how sooper serious DJ’s condishun was & referred her out because she just wasn’t equipped to handle such a complex case. Poor doctor definitely didn’t just nope her the fuck outta her dingy office as fast as possible to clean up all the puke, piss, & crazy DJ left in her wake.

After the more spicy munching of DJ, Imaginationbycat’s poorly-wielded pastel makeup palette is like a mint to clear my palate.

Spoiler: Now for some Caity stanning

Just after Caity informed us that Skabies... Scrabble... Skrumpet? Ahem, that the unfortunately named creature isn’t her service dog (or dying, despite the melodramatic posts claiming so & lack of correction afterward), she posted this. Not sure if she was lugging the little allergen on four legs around herself, hanging with momma munchie, or with another SDT from ThE CoMmUnItY but OK this definitely happened.

Note to self, take a gander into momma. Anyone claiming that hairy muppet as an SD seems like a good time.

Since her visit here Caity’s been kinda boring, focusing mainly on weebing out while quietly continuing to monetize her sickstagram. She’s been tagging affiliate accounts & even selling shoutouts in her stories to other sickstagrammers. I’m happy for her! Since she spends all day smearing crayon on her face & playing dress up instead of working, she must feel guilty for the financial burden she puts on her family.

Or my bad, they’re the ones dragging her down. Whatever.

I really don’t know what’s worse here, the photoshop skills, fingerpainting, purple prose... or the fact that she thinks Rick Rolling is still hilarious & relatable.


Gorl you edited out half your nose & every last pore, how you look at this like YUP I LOOK FIRE *post*

ETA: some funnies & correct spoiler formatting
Edit revisited: how did I not notice 1/2 the Jessi stalking didn’t go up the 1st time around? The weekly DDoS attacks are really cramping my style, oops

 

[Ellesse_warrior]

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Those are the ugliest socks I've ever seen in my life.

 

[AnotherLolAnon]

Those are the ugliest socks I've ever seen in my life.

Gotta get those "cute" but medically pointless fashion compression stockings. An imaginary treatment for your imaginary pots!

 

[TonySoprano]

Those are the ugliest socks I've ever seen in my life.

Does she really feel it necessary to lay there looking like she's just been chloroformed by Ted Bundy.



Oh, and I came on here from Reddit after poking around on the IF subs for less than a week... Never lurked, perhaps that is to my detriment idk.. probably..

And KFS is one of the few people (a very limited pool of people indeed ) who has two sides of a brain that communicate and has no problem filling people in on the details.

 

[elliptical narcissist]

How nice that Jessi's jaundice has resolved and liver failure won't be one of the things she's 'dying' of.

lol @ all the junk food on the bedside table of someone who resumes 'dying' if she's off IV feeds for a minute or two.

 

[Toohottotrot]

It could be for her visitors wait this is a munchie thread what’s so magic about Tpn besides liver failure is it the bullshit parazylzsis end prize before the headstone telling people you existed in 30 years ago

 

[Cold Waffle]

It could be for her visitors wait this is a munchie thread what’s so magic about Tpn besides liver failure is it the bullshit parazylzsis end prize before the headstone telling people you existed in 30 years ago

Translation: The junk food could be for her visitors -- oh wait, this is a munchie thread, so the snacks are probably for her, since she's clearly faking. Also, what's so magical about TPN besides liver failure? Is it the bullshit paralysis end prize before you die? Once you're dead, you replace your TPN trophy with a headstone that tells people you existed 30 years after you've died and people have forgotten about you.

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

It could be for her visitors wait this is a munchie thread what’s so magic about Tpn besides liver failure is it the bullshit parazylzsis end prize before the headstone telling people you existed in 30 years ago

TPN means you're really super duper sick, way sicker than those losers who only have a feeding tube. only the sickest of the sick get TPN.

Just more dumb munchie bragging rights.

Speaking of fatties claiming they don't eat, Autistic Kat Food Watch update:


We got some cinnamon raisin bagels, a bottle of pancake syrup, a variety pack of potato chips, coffee K-cups, english muffins... Totally someone who can't eat anything and needs to be on TPN!

 

[Cold Waffle]

S-J's missed some comments on her "I TOOK WHAT I SHOULDN'T HAVE (8.29.19)" video. Not everyone is going to give you asspats and coo at you for your ditzy risk-taking behavior, Sarah-Jean.

Way back when her shiny life started to fall apart, she got into an accident and totaled her car. She said she "misjudged" the distance between her and the car in front of her. This shows precedent for idiot driving patterns, and her quest to take over Jaquie's YouTube throne is only encouraging her more. One of these days, she's going to get into an accident while filming. She'll upload it just like she uploaded the legendary video of her falling out of her wheelchair...only it won't be as funny, since she'll be putting others at risk.