Operation Chris Eater commences

[blackie toy]

Well hopefully two months is enough for the PD to realise that Chris will never take a plea bargain and will just give up on him. That or the judge sees that he's wasting time and tries him in contempt of court.

Doesn't work that way. If Chris wants a trial, the PD will take it to trial. He won't lie, and he affirm any of Chris's lies, but he won't affirmatively throw Chris under the bus. And the court won't hold him in contempt unless he actually does waste the court's time—in other words, actively disrupting the proceedings, rather than simply demanding a trial (which is his constitutional right).

 

[CWCissey]

Doesn't work that way. If Chris wants a trial, the PD will take it to trial. He won't lie, and he affirm any of Chris's lies, but he won't affirmatively throw Chris under the bus. And the court won't hold him in contempt unless he actually does waste the court's time—in other words, actively disrupting the proceedings, rather than simply demanding a trial (which is his constitutional right).

But surely slander and yelling about twolls and lying male jerks would class as disrupting proceedings?

 

[Skeletor]

...since he'll probably have refused to plead out.

God dammit, Chris...

 

[DeadMansHand]

Docket search says today was another continuance. I bet it's due to the need to actually consult with Chris in depth since he'll probably have refused to plead out.

The preliminary hearing has almost nothing to do with the PD. The judge is just looking at whether there's enough evidence to move to ask for an indictment.

If it's a continuance of the preliminary hearing, it's almost definitely from the prosecution. It could also be that the continuance is due to being moved to the grand jury. Have to wait and see what the people who were there said.

@Rammspieler has an interesting Son-Chu pic on his twitter, and says he got video of Charb, so I'm dying to hear from him.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

I'm surprised there's no "Ricardo" or "Christopher" or "Christine" in the "AKA1" and "AKA2" fields.

 

[CWC Tok]

i had a feeling this was just the beginning

What part of PRELIMINARY hearing do people not seem to understand?

Doesn't work that way. If Chris wants a trial, the PD will take it to trial. He won't lie, and he affirm any of Chris's lies, but he won't affirmatively throw Chris under the bus. And the court won't hold him in contempt unless he actually does waste the court's time—in other words, actively disrupting the proceedings, rather than simply demanding a trial (which is his constitutional right).

This is correct. The decision on whether or not to go to trial is the choice of client, not counsel.

 

[blackie toy]

But surely slander and yelling about twolls and lying male jerks would class as disrupting proceedings?

Testimony is not slander (except under very limited circumstances). Anyway, the remedy for random or irrelevant personal commentary in testimony is (1) striking it from the record, (2) instructing the jury to disregard it, and (3) ordering the witness to not do that again. Outbursts by a non-witness during proceedings would potentially result in removal from the courtroom.

Actual sanctions, like getting locked up for contempt, is just flat out unlikely. Things like throwing an orange at the judge during the proceedings might do it.

 

[blackie toy]

The preliminary hearing has almost nothing to do with the PD. The judge is just looking at whether there's enough evidence to move to ask for an indictment.

Well, I'm not entirely versed in Va. criminal procedure, but just bear in mind, of all the legal things that vary from state to state, the nuts and bolts procedural things like this are the things that (at least classically) vary the most.

If it's a continuance of the preliminary hearing, it's almost definitely from the prosecution. It could also be that the continuance is due to being moved to the grand jury. Have to wait and see what the people who were there said.

Mmm... maybe. You're right though, at this point we're just guessing.

 

[Anchuent Christory]

Testimony is not slander.

Exactly, Chris is entitled to tell his side of the story, regardless of how batshit crazy it is (within reason)

Actual sanctions, like getting locked up for contempt, is just flat out unlikely. Things like throwing an orange at the judge during the proceedings might do it

Chris throwing something at the judge is unlikely but possible. Chris being in possession of an orange is just plain science fiction.

 

[blackie toy]

Chris throwing something at the judge is unlikely but possible. Chris being in possession of an orange is just plain science fiction.

Well, or wearing an American Flag diaper.

If you get either reference, you're the true winner.

 

[Trans Fat 41g]

To be continued...

On the next episode of AMC's God and the Bear: The Final Season.

 

[SOINCHU]

racking up a lot of probation and community service stuff,

Speaking of community service...I know Chris was assigned community service hours back in 2011 for the Game Place incident. Does anyone know what he did to fulfill his community service hours?

 

[CWCissey]

Well, or wearing an American Flag diaper.

If you get either reference, you're the true winner.

Nah, he's more likely to yell 'Fuck this court' and call the jury '12 trolls and JERKS'

 

[Yukon Cornelius]

I like to imagine Chris, not having any real concept of what a preliminary hearing is, constantly trying to plead his case in the courtroom, with everyone else just trying to get through their day. "But your honor...! Mmmf! The ass manager!"

 

[The Other Chandler]

I've been sitting here at work refreshing this page to see what happened. I think I might have a problem.

 

[Francis York Morgan]

Nah, he's more likely to yell 'Fuck this court' and call the jury '12 trolls and JERKS'

Just think of what his reaction will be if Chris takes this to trial and all twelve members of the jury are male.

 

[lisaface]

Since Rammspieler only said it was "continued", I would take that to mean that they didn't even have the preliminary hearing today? Otherwise I would have expected different language, whatever would be appropriate for sending the case to the grand jury. Or can "continued" mean that as well?

 

[Mollybdenum]

@Rammspieler You said you sat directly behind Chris, could you smell him?

 

[AnOminous]

April 2 is a Thursday, and the hearing is scheduled for 9:30 A.M. again.

As noted previously, Thursdays at 9:30 A.M. is the time reserved for felony preliminary hearings in Albemarle County District Court. Not surprising for a continuance. Others have guessed he refused to enter a plea at this time, which seems a pretty reasonable speculation, but since some witness may tell us soon enough, I won't speculate further.

 

[Henry Bemis]

Assuming that Chris now knows his PD...Lawd, help them, because they will know no peace. Not because of ween, but because Chris will be working overtime to get them up to speed on the (irrelevant) facts of his stressful life.