حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 125 13.1%
  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.7%
  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 528 55.3%
  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 228 23.9%

  • Total voters
    954
I know I'm legit bipolar, but Christ on a cracker.
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What do you guys think? Is dealing with Connor that frustrating, or should I go up another 150mg on the mood stabilizers?
 

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You know, Connor, life can be difficult sometimes and yes, meeting assholes is grating; being betrayed by those you trusted can hurt deeply (although I fail to see how you've ever experienced that so far in your life). But this shying away from life experience, for even these bad things are all part of the great and varied tapestry of life, will only bring you misery and lack of fulfilment in the end. And that is far, far more painful than any incident where a girl cuts in line in front of you. Trust me, I know.

We've all come into the world, have our allotted time on its surface and then leave again - to who knows where? Maybe to never again exist or know pleasure, sadness, fear, love, anticipation or hope. But we can all have it here and now, each and every day. You should seize the day, Connor, while you are young and there is time. The universe has granted you this miraculous thing called "life". Use it well.
 
Alright. Starting tonight, I'm going to undertake a challenge. I'm going to delete my Facebook account and turn off the Wi-Fi capability of my computer, only using the Internet to check my e-mails, doing research and completing online homework assignments. Other than that, I'm going to be working on my resume and my fiction writing. Sound good?
 
@Connor The first mention of Kiwifarms under your name is on page 3 and is a template resume made for you.

https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/connorbible-pdf.14090/

Alright. Starting tonight, I'm going to undertake a challenge. I'm going to delete my Facebook account and turn off the Wi-Fi capability of my computer, only using the Internet to check my e-mails, doing research and completing online homework assignments. Other than that, I'm going to be working on my resume and my fiction writing. Sound good?

Okay, see you in a couple hours.
 
Alright. Starting tonight, I'm going to undertake a challenge. I'm going to delete my Facebook account and turn off the Wi-Fi capability of my computer, only using the Internet to check my e-mails, doing research and completing online homework assignments. Other than that, I'm going to be working on my resume and my fiction writing. Sound good?

Considering your track record for sticking to things you say, my hopes aren't high.

See you in a few days, Fatty Ding-Dongs.
 
Alright. Starting tonight, I'm going to undertake a challenge. I'm going to delete my Facebook account and turn off the Wi-Fi capability of my computer, only using the Internet to check my e-mails, doing research and completing online homework assignments. Other than that, I'm going to be working on my resume and my fiction writing. Sound good?

Lolno. You don't even have the willpower to stop fapping for a few hours. How the hell will you accomplish all that?
 
Alright. Starting tonight, I'm going to undertake a challenge. I'm going to delete my Facebook account and turn off the Wi-Fi capability of my computer, only using the Internet to check my e-mails, doing research and completing online homework assignments. Other than that, I'm going to be working on my resume and my fiction writing. Sound good?
Oh-ho-ho, no you don't, kiddo. You've given us this song & dance before. I'm not falling for it this time. Even though I did the last few times.

But you said a couple weeks ago you had already deleted your Facebook account.
Uh, yeah. Care to explain, @Connor?
 
Alright. Starting tonight, I'm going to undertake a challenge. I'm going to delete my Facebook account and turn off the Wi-Fi capability of my computer, only using the Internet to check my e-mails, doing research and completing online homework assignments. Other than that, I'm going to be working on my resume and my fiction writing. Sound good?

you can you an add-on like this to block specific websites. even though you won't.
 
Goodness this thread is fucking exploding while I'm typing up Wrong Planet - Part 20: The Connoring! Keep fighting the Good Fight, Kiwis.

Connor's inability to finish reading things has never been more apparent then the authors he says are Stephen King's lessers.
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Hahaha, WOW. Connor is the SECOND POST on a thread about the James Holmes shooting, and let me tell you. It's wonderful.
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I ended up deleting the post by accident which turned out to be great because I forgot to screen cap this thread! I think we should invite Connor's uncle to the forum he seems like a really cool dude.
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I know this has already been posted before (or something like it), but considering how the thread has gone today I thought it was very apropos.
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I'm literally speechless.
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"... means I'm waiting for a reply"
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Can someone set this to a banner on Connor's profile?
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I hope your uncle lives forever Connor
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Jesus Christ! "I'm 20 years old and getting ready to go to college!" that's all you had to say god damn
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What a dickhead
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Whelp, I was actually wrong. Turns out trolling Connor is a time honored tradition. But what's interesting, really interesting, is they actually reprimand the guy fucking with CONNOR. Not Connor, you know, the shithead who's laughed at mass murders, lied about his parents, called an aspie girl a cunt for not dating him, and wishing his uncle would just die already. Nah it's the guy teasing him. Fuck Wrong Planet, they're enabling idiots.

This pisses me off I'm going to leave this cap unspoilered because this braggadocio and lack of tact is allowed.
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See? This came up after my little rant
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Goodness this thread is fucking exploding while I'm typing up Wrong Planet - Part 20: The Connoring!
You know I was kind of vaguely sympathetic to Connor at some point in time, and wouldn't you know it, now I can't remember why! :)

I am having to restrain myself from Power A-logging because holy shit @Connor no one has ever deserved a swift ass-kicking quite like you do. What sort of mongoloid subhuman trash calls other people's kids "handmedowns and leftovers"? What kind of fucked up stupid asshole does that? I mean, just let that sink in, guys...in case you didn't read it. Direct Connor Quote: "Still, I'd rather have kids of my own in the future rather than someone's handmedowns and leftovers." That is by far the scummiest, cruelest, most retarded thing I've ever heard you say @Connor, you deserve infinite scorn and shame for that statement. To just dismiss the worth of kids just because they're not yours is cruel and inhuman.

You're talking about what your "future lover/wife" would like? Nigga what future lover? what fucking wife? You have a zero percent chance of either as it stands, man! Unless you are just a completely different person in real life or something, which I highly highly doubt.

I'm getting super pissed off re-reading your inane drivel, so in conclusion please don't do anything different than what you're doing right now. Please live your life just as you are right now, so that your current regimen of anti-attraction succeeds in removing you from the gene pool.

I mean come on, hand-me-downs and leftovers? THOSE ARE FUCKING KIDS YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, LITTLE LIVES THERE TO BE CHERISHED YOU INSANE FAGGOT. :c

bonus round edit: today I told someone that when you're a girl it's real difficult to date sometimes because you aren't sure whether or not a guy is crazy or what, but with you it's really easy to tell, you just put it right out there, "Hey look at me I'm a complete loser and I'm ugly inside and out!" and for that I salute you @Connor.

double edit: I know I said I wasn't gonna A-log and then I went and did it but man those kids did nothing wrong other than being in a bad situation, they're probably really scared and alone and constantly feeling worthless, thinking "why didn't my parents love me?" or something equivalent, feeling envious of the kids whose parents were fucking dead because they didn't have that kind of quandary, and then @Connor's stupid fat ass comes in all bleating about how these kids are less valuable than genetically similar offspring and I fall apart. I shed tears because foster care fucking sucks and those kids are suffering through it every day, man.
 
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What a dickhead

Whelp, I was actually wrong. Turns out trolling Connor is a time honored tradition. But what's interesting, really interesting, is they actually reprimand the guy fucking with CONNOR. Not Connor, you know, the shithead who's laughed at mass murders, lied about his parents, called an aspie girl a cunt for not dating him, and wishing his uncle would just die already. Nah it's the guy teasing him. Fuck Wrong Planet, they're enabling idiots.

This pisses me off I'm going to leave this cap unspoilered because this braggadocio and lack of tact is allowed.
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....You're kidding me, right? Did that seriously happen???

Wrong Planet gets all fanny flustered when someone jokes around with Connor, but Connor is allowed to post threads about literally stalking a mentally unstable girl, where he told any and all other members who told him to leave her alone and stop being such a creep to "fuck off" or "go fuck yourself?" Or how about the many times he straight-up insulted other members (mocking forum members for believing in God at least twice, asking for advice and then insulting the people who gave him some, etc)? Connor was so insanely belligerent on Wrong Planet and yet people just ignored him or politely told him to relax while the mods did nothing but enable him. And yet that other guy is clearly in the wrong for making a fucking joke that didn't involve something horrible and offensive. Okay.

It's official, Wrong Planet should be renamed Enabling Planet.
 
You know I was kind of vaguely sympathetic to Connor at some point in time, and wouldn't you know it, now I can't remember why! :)

Direct Connor Quote: "Still, I'd rather have kids of my own in the future rather than someone's handmedowns and leftovers."

@Connor.

Connor, I've waffled from being downright A-loggy at you, to trying to sincerely be helpful to your rather pathetic personal situation in life. It varied by day. You'd say something inane, I'd get pissed, yell at you, but my deep-down feeling that everyone is capable of personal improvement would win out in the end, and I'd honestly do my best to give you relevant advice. To try to reach out to a fellow human being to improve their situation.

With the above comment, you have both proven me wrong, and quite frankly- earned my deepest contempt. As an adopted person, I take deep personal offence at you comparing both me, and my adoptive parents loving relationship to a fucking goodwill jacket or Tupperware of leftover noodles. Your comment proves you emotional shallowness, intellectual buffoonery, and an almost titanium carbide resistance to accepting anything remotely approaching what constitutes a healthy emotional relationship in our society.

And not to put too fine a point on it, If I had you in arm's reach right now, I'd disjoint you like a fucking chicken. I'm that goddamn angry with your bullshit.

But simply put, you're not worth being made a personal project. All told, you're simply a pathetic know-nothing tryhard bag of bullshit and misogyny, leeching off the sweat of others for your living, impotently posturing as an "oppressed misunderstood intellectual" while you masturbate and dream of sadistic acts you would never have the balls or backbone to actually preform in the real world.

With the intell both you and this site have provided into your situation, I can think of no more appropriate fate to a total waste of biomass like yourself.

Enjoy your own personal hell. It's been forged by your own willful ignorance and apathy. You made your bed, now lie in it. It's no one's fault but your own.
 
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....You're kidding me, right? Did that seriously happen???

Wrong Planet gets all fanny flustered when someone jokes around with Connor, but Connor is allowed to post threads about literally stalking a mentally unstable girl, where he told any and all other members who told him to leave her alone and stop being such a creep to "fuck off" or "go fuck yourself?" Or how about the many times he straight-up insulted other members (mocking forum members for believing in God at least twice, asking for advice and then insulting the people who gave him some, etc)? Connor was so insanely belligerent on Wrong Planet and yet people just ignored him or politely told him to relax while the mods did nothing but enable him. And yet that other guy is clearly in the wrong for making a fucking joke that didn't involve something horrible and offensive. Okay.

It's official, Wrong Planet should be renamed Enabling Planet.

I had a psychologist recommend Wrong Planet to me when I was younger. I'm sure he was just naive about what it really was. I'm glad my usual lack of followthrough occurred here.
 
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