Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

They forgot kit fisto. Unacceptable.
We are all Kit Fisto
haroldfisto.jpeg

harold.jpg


and it is beautiful.....
 
Alright, here's a simple easy-to-read greentext of all leaks and spoilers made to be as simple as possible while only focusing on keynotes (made with help from @Dr W).

>Rey and Leia training on Endor
>Kylo Ren meets Palpatine on Byss Exogol by using the mcguffin/wayfinder inside Vader's helmet
>FO hangs out there now
>Resistance is useless on Ajan Kloss (includes Rose, not-Ackbar, Yellow Yoda, Wedge, Nien Nub, Snap and BASED KLAUD)
>Resistance informant Bobliobobobobo is working for Hux
>Bobobo gets killed by assassin
>Everyone reunites for Operation: S.I.T.H. D.A.G.G.E.R
>Go to Not-Tatooine 2 for Burning Man to find old sith assassin called Ochi
>some old dude asks Rey who she is and says she don't know "nobody knows"
>meet Lando who has Ochi's dagger
>Siths now have stupid tradition where they write down all their secrets on their daggers for some damn reason
>"I got a bad feeling about this"
>Ren, the Knights of Ren and the FO attack Burning Man
>Ren and Ren fight and Sandship escape
>everyone escapes the planet on Ochi's ship which now serves as nu-Falcon
>Take C-3PO to not-Hoth 2 which is an ice asteroid to meet Crazy Frog the Droid Tinkerer so he can be programmed to read stupid dagger runes
>meet lady Boba Fett who is Poe's ex-gf (WHAT A COINCIDENCE!)
>she takes them to Crazy Frog
>3PO has meaningless fake out death by getting memories erased and now reads dagger words
>magic words make Rey see not-Endor where evil mcguffin/wayfinder is so they go there
>Drax shows up and sells them out to the FO
>they escape and go to not-Endor
>R2 reveals he has a backup of 3PO
>Hux gets killed and is replaced with Wyte Pryde who is his killer
>Stronk blak wahmyn aka Finn's sister with bow shows up and takes them to Death Star ruins on horses who are tard-ified versions of old aliens
>Rey sees evil violent Rey who is a vision when she touches mcguffin
>Kylo Ren magically shows up
>stops vision and talks about Palpy
>then Ren tries to kill Rey
>big battle on water with death star floating and memberberries
>Rey wins
>flashback reveals that Luke didn't want to train Rey cuz she's Palpy's descendant (OMG JJ RETCONNED TLJ! BASED JJ! HE SAVED LUKE AND SW! PRAISE DISNEY! PRAISE JJ! OMGZZZZZZZZZZ!!! [jizzes soy])
>Leia dies
>crew goes back to Ajan Kloss
>everyone cries cuz Leia dead again
>Rey gets Leia's lightsaber
>Lando says "hope"
>everyone's happy again
>Rey uses Wayfinder to show everyone how to get to Exogol in the Unknown Regions to attack FO and Palpy
>Emo Ren is alive and returns to Palpatine
>Palpatine mad
>Palpatine has knights of Ren fight Emo Ren
>big space battle full of memberberries and a bunch of OT and Disney EU ships as they arrive on Exogol
>Rey goes alone
>Rey confronts Palpatine
>senses Emo Ren in trouble
>gives him spare saber
>kill knights of Ren
>both unite to kill Palpy
>Daddy Palpy is mad at Rey cuz she a shit successor and not evil
>so he gonna kill her and Ren and eat their souls to become young again
>bunch of Death Star Destroyers pop out of ground with Sith Troopers
>Resistance gonna take out Pryde's ship which holds guiding beacon for Destroyers to follow outside Unknown Regions
>Resistance led by Finn, Sis and Rose on space horses ride on ships to fight Sith Troopers
>Lando and Chewie lead charge against flagship in Falcon with help of Snap, Klaud, Wedge and not-Ackbar (and Nien Nub who doesn't deserve this)
>Wedge supposedly dies
>Palpy puts Rey and Ren through harsh challenges and illusions
>Kylo gets killed by Palpy and he eats his energy to make him young and powerful again
>Palpy beats Rey
>Rey summons all jedi ghosts including Ren to kill Palpy
>Rey disables entire empire fleet of donut steel destroyers with Avatar powers
>Finn and gang break into flagship and has all ships shoot each other
>Bad guys dead
>Poe does something ambiguously gay for woke points and secured positive news coverage from CNN and Twitter
>Everyone celebrates
>Rey morns fuckers she hardly knew
>Everyone goes to Tatooine (the place Luke hated) and bury his, Leia and Han's stuff there
>some old dude asks Rey who she is
>"I'm Rey Skywalker"
>Don't waste money to see this shit heap. Just pirate it if you're curious.


Shortest format:
>gang gets a magic dagger mcguffin
>they translate it
>it leads them to mcguffin that leads them to Palpatine
>LEIA DIES
>big member berry space battle with space horses
>KYLO REN DIES
>Rey is Palpy's grandkid
>Rey becomes Avatar the Last Jedi
>Rey kills Palpatine and saves da world
>everyone goes to Tatooine
>Rey is now a Skywalker for some reason
>don't pay to see this for the love of humanity! why would you give them your money for this? Just pirate it, use a different ticket or Solid Snake your way into the theater
 
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I like how despite how the wokesters claimed how this movie series was the pinnacle of diversity, you gotta love all the token characters are shoved in the background so the focus relies entirely on white Mary Sue and her Emo School Schooter toyfuck.

ALSO YES DEATH TO STORMPILOT. I can't wait for the SJWs to pile on to Boyega and Isaac like wild dogs. It's what they deserve for pandering to the fujoshits.
 
Alright, here's a simple easy-to-read greentext of all leaks and spoilers made to be as simple as possible while only focusing on keynotes (made with help from @Dr W).

>Rey and Leia training on Endor
>Kylo Ren meets Palpatine on Byss Exogol by using the mcguffin/wayfinder inside Vader's helmet
>FO hangs out there now
>Resistance is useless on Ajan Kloss (includes Rose, not-Ackbar, Yellow Yoda, Wedge, Nien Nub, Snap and BASED KLAUD)
>Resistance informant Bobliobobobobo is working for Hux
>Bobobo gets killed by assassin
>Everyone reunites for Operation: S.I.T.H. D.A.G.G.E.R
>Go to Not-Tatooine 2 for Burning Man to find old sith assassin called Ochi
>some old dude asks Rey who she is and says she don't know "nobody knows"
>meet Lando who has Ochi's dagger
>Siths now have stupid tradition where they write down all their secrets on their daggers for some damn reason
>"I got a bad feeling about this"
>everyone escapes on Ochi's ship which now serves as nu-Falcon
>Take C-3PO to not-Hoth 2 which is a ice asteroid to meet Crazy Frog the Droid Tinkerer so he can be programmed to read stupid dagger runes
>meet lady Boba Fett who is Poe's ex-gf (WHAT A COINCIDENCE!)
>she takes them to Crazy Frog
>3PO has meaningless fake out death by getting memories erased and now reads dagger words
>magic words make Rey see not-Endor where evil mcguffin/wayfinder is so they go there
>Drax shows up and sells them out to the FO
>they escape and go to not-Endor
>R2 reveals he has a backup of 3PO
>Hux gets killed and is replaced with Wyte Pryde who is his killer
>Stronk blak wahmyn aka Finn's sister with bow shows up and takes them to Death Star ruins on horses who are tard-ified versions of old aliens
>Rey sees evil violent Rey who is a vision when she touches mcguffin
>Kylo Ren magically shows up
>stops vision and talks about Palpy
>then Ren tries to kill Rey
>big battle on water with death star floating and memberberries
>Rey wins
>flashback reveals that Luke didn't want to train Rey cuz she's Palpy's descendant (OMG JJ RETCONNED TLJ! BASED JJ! HE SAVED LUKE AND SW! PRAISE DISNEY! PRAISE JJ! OMGZZZZZZZZZZ!!! [jizzes soy])
>Leia dies
>crew goes back to Ajan Kloss
>everyone cries cuz Leia dead again
>Rey gets Leia's lightsaber
>Lando says "hope"
>everyone's happy again
>Rey uses Wayfinder to show everyone how to get to Exogol in the Unknown Regions to attack FO and Palpy
>Emo Ren is alive and returns to Palpatine
>Palpatine mad
>Palpatine has knights of Ren fight Emo Ren
>big space battle full of memberberries and a bunch of OT and Disney EU ships as they arrive on Exogol
>Rey goes alone
>Rey confronts Palpatine
>senses Emo Ren in trouble
>gives him spare saber
>kill knights of Ren
>both unite to kill Palpy
>Daddy Palpy is mad at Rey cuz she a shit successor and not evil
>so he gonna kill her and Ren and eat their souls to become young again
>bunch of Death Star Destroyers pop out of ground with Sith Troopers
>Resistance gonna take out Pryde's ship which holds guiding beacon for Destroyers to follow outside Unknown Regions
>Resistance led by Finn, Sis and Rose on space horses ride on ships to fight Sith Troopers
>Lando and Chewie lead charge against flagship with help of Snap, Klaud, Wedge and not-Ackbar (and Nien Nub who doesn't deserve this)
>Wedge supposedly dies
>Palpy puts Rey and Ren through harsh challenges and illusions
>Kylo gets killed by Palpy and he eats his energy to make him young and powerful again
>Palpy beats Rey
>Rey summons all jedi ghosts including Ren to kill Palpy
>Rey disables entire empire fleet of donut steel destroyers with Avatar powers
>Finn and gang break into flagship and has all ships shoot each other
>Bad guys dead
>Poe does something ambiguously gay for woke points and secured positive news coverage from CNN and Twitter
>Everyone celebrates
>Rey morns fuckers she hardly knew
>Everyone goes to Tatooine (the place Luke hated) and bury his, Leia and Han's stuff there
>some old dude asks Rey who she is
>"I'm Rey Skywalker"
>Don't go to this movie


Shortest format:
>gang gets a magic dagger mcguffin
>they translate it
>it leads them to mcguffin that leads them to Palpatine
>LEIA DIES
>big member berry space battle with space horses
>KYLO REN DIES
>Rey is Palpy's grandkid
>Rey becomes Avatar the Last Jedi
>Rey kills Palpatine and saves da world
>everyone goes to Tatooine
>Rey is now a Skywalker for some reason
>don't go see this for the love of humanity why would you give them your money for this?
I'm going to see this thing through to the fucking end. It's like visiting a dying relative in their final hours: its a horrible unpleasant exerience but you feel obligated to see it through to the end just to get a sense of closure. This is it... the last dance... the twilight of an era... the beginning of the end... the fall of an empire
 
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Alright, here's a simple easy-to-read greentext of all leaks and spoilers made to be as simple as possible while only focusing on keynotes (made with help from @Dr W).

>Rey and Leia training on Endor
>Kylo Ren meets Palpatine on Byss Exogol by using the mcguffin/wayfinder inside Vader's helmet
>FO hangs out there now
>Resistance is useless on Ajan Kloss (includes Rose, not-Ackbar, Yellow Yoda, Wedge, Nien Nub, Snap and BASED KLAUD)
>Resistance informant Bobliobobobobo is working for Hux
>Bobobo gets killed by assassin
>Everyone reunites for Operation: S.I.T.H. D.A.G.G.E.R
>Go to Not-Tatooine 2 for Burning Man to find old sith assassin called Ochi
>some old dude asks Rey who she is and says she don't know "nobody knows"
>meet Lando who has Ochi's dagger
>Siths now have stupid tradition where they write down all their secrets on their daggers for some damn reason
>"I got a bad feeling about this"
>everyone escapes on Ochi's ship which now serves as nu-Falcon
>Take C-3PO to not-Hoth 2 which is a ice asteroid to meet Crazy Frog the Droid Tinkerer so he can be programmed to read stupid dagger runes
>meet lady Boba Fett who is Poe's ex-gf (WHAT A COINCIDENCE!)
>she takes them to Crazy Frog
>3PO has meaningless fake out death by getting memories erased and now reads dagger words
>magic words make Rey see not-Endor where evil mcguffin/wayfinder is so they go there
>Drax shows up and sells them out to the FO
>they escape and go to not-Endor
>R2 reveals he has a backup of 3PO
>Hux gets killed and is replaced with Wyte Pryde who is his killer
>Stronk blak wahmyn aka Finn's sister with bow shows up and takes them to Death Star ruins on horses who are tard-ified versions of old aliens
>Rey sees evil violent Rey who is a vision when she touches mcguffin
>Kylo Ren magically shows up
>stops vision and talks about Palpy
>then Ren tries to kill Rey
>big battle on water with death star floating and memberberries
>Rey wins
>flashback reveals that Luke didn't want to train Rey cuz she's Palpy's descendant (OMG JJ RETCONNED TLJ! BASED JJ! HE SAVED LUKE AND SW! PRAISE DISNEY! PRAISE JJ! OMGZZZZZZZZZZ!!! [jizzes soy])
>Leia dies
>crew goes back to Ajan Kloss
>everyone cries cuz Leia dead again
>Rey gets Leia's lightsaber
>Lando says "hope"
>everyone's happy again
>Rey uses Wayfinder to show everyone how to get to Exogol in the Unknown Regions to attack FO and Palpy
>Emo Ren is alive and returns to Palpatine
>Palpatine mad
>Palpatine has knights of Ren fight Emo Ren
>big space battle full of memberberries and a bunch of OT and Disney EU ships as they arrive on Exogol
>Rey goes alone
>Rey confronts Palpatine
>senses Emo Ren in trouble
>gives him spare saber
>kill knights of Ren
>both unite to kill Palpy
>Daddy Palpy is mad at Rey cuz she a shit successor and not evil
>so he gonna kill her and Ren and eat their souls to become young again
>bunch of Death Star Destroyers pop out of ground with Sith Troopers
>Resistance gonna take out Pryde's ship which holds guiding beacon for Destroyers to follow outside Unknown Regions
>Resistance led by Finn, Sis and Rose on space horses ride on ships to fight Sith Troopers
>Lando and Chewie lead charge against flagship with help of Snap, Klaud, Wedge and not-Ackbar (and Nien Nub who doesn't deserve this)
>Wedge supposedly dies
>Palpy puts Rey and Ren through harsh challenges and illusions
>Kylo gets killed by Palpy and he eats his energy to make him young and powerful again
>Palpy beats Rey
>Rey summons all jedi ghosts including Ren to kill Palpy
>Rey disables entire empire fleet of donut steel destroyers with Avatar powers
>Finn and gang break into flagship and has all ships shoot each other
>Bad guys dead
>Poe does something ambiguously gay for woke points and secured positive news coverage from CNN and Twitter
>Everyone celebrates
>Rey morns fuckers she hardly knew
>Everyone goes to Tatooine (the place Luke hated) and bury his, Leia and Han's stuff there
>some old dude asks Rey who she is
>"I'm Rey Skywalker"
>Don't go to this movie


Shortest format:
>gang gets a magic dagger mcguffin
>they translate it
>it leads them to mcguffin that leads them to Palpatine
>LEIA DIES
>big member berry space battle with space horses
>KYLO REN DIES
>Rey is Palpy's grandkid
>Rey becomes Avatar the Last Jedi
>Rey kills Palpatine and saves da world
>everyone goes to Tatooine
>Rey is now a Skywalker for some reason
>don't go see this for the love of humanity why would you give them your money for this?
Jeez.

I'm glad I was never into Star Wars.
 
I'm going to see this thing through to the fucking end. It's like visiting a dying relative in their final hours: its a horrible unpleasant exerience but you feel obligated to see it through to the end just to get a sense of closure. This is it... the last dance... the twilight of an era... the beginning of the end... the fall of an empire
That relative died on October 30, 2012, all you'd be doing now is taking your time to watch someone who dug up their corpse just to fuck it. A better sense of closure is just rewatching ROTJ. Disney only created the illusion of no-closure after they had JJ nullify everything the previous heroes achieved. Only good reason to watch this crapfest now (without paying) is for what might be the biggest cinematic dumpster fire of the decade after Goatsebusters and also if you're a masochist.
A_World_Between_Worlds_concept_4.jpg

 
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I'm going to see this thing through to the fucking end. It's like visiting a dying relative in their final hours: its a horrible unpleasant exerience but you feel obligated to see it through to the end just to get a sense of closure. This is it... the last dance... the twilight of an era... the beginning of the end... the fall of an empire
Its how i felt with Revenge of the Sith
 
@FROG I am surprised you arent cracking into numerous videos on this

Space horses on a Star Destroy in Space in a Space battle.....what in the actual hell
He was in one of the High Council streams talking about the movie with the other anti-Disney tubers a few hours ago. I posted a link before.

Also here's "George Lucas" reacting to IX's final trailer.
 
One of the things I've been thinking about for awhile today was the 3PO scene. He called them all his friends. Does anyone know how many words he spoke to any NuWars characters in TFA or TLJ? I honestly can't remember a single thing he said from TLJ, and I think the only things he did in TFA was chat a little about the star map, and mention that R2 was shut off in the corner.

Did they really think people would be baited by that nostalgia? That's the scene everyone should be furious about. Excluding NuWars novels and comics he hasn't had any interaction with these characters. Look at IV:

He's purchased and fixed up by Luke after Leia has ejected him into space with R2 and the plans.
He talks about the current goings on in the galaxy, and gives Luke the drive to go and get Ben's help.
He might not play the most important role on the Deathstar or on Yavin, but he's with the group nonetheless, and builds a relationship with them.

V he's present at the base and gets onto the Falcon to go to Cloud City. He gets led astray and is dismantled.
Chewie has to lug him around while he's broken.
Isn't this also the movie where Han yells "never tell me the odds" at 3PO? It's just more examples of how much he interacted with the group, and wasn't just a gold statue in the background.

VI he helps with the mission to get Han out, and is present throughout the beginning. The group is only saved from the Ewoks because of 3PO and gold finish.

What I'm trying to say is that 3PO had a reason to call Han, Luke, Leia, and Chewie his friends. He had all sorts of adventures with them. Now they're giving him a role in this movie (rather than in VII when he should've been more than just nostalgia bait), and that role is to just die off and be replaced by an edgelord version of himself? Why? Who thought that was good writing? Why wasn't he given significance to the Nucrew before this movie?
 
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