حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[It's HK-47]

I would read @Smutley's posts. They're informative, and damn funny to boot.

Not to mention the steady degradation one of the kindest members on our forums, whose unending well of generosity was still too shallow a font for the vacuum of Connor's toxicity, resulting in a backlash from her the likes of which we will never again witness.

 

[Grand Number of Pounds]

Yes, seeing someone who is usually very nice become very angry over someone's idiocy is an awesome sight.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

He can't even trollshield right.

I'm guessing that he tried to pass it off as "lol, remember this chick?" instead of "Look at this new thing!!!" in an attempt to make the shielding less obvious, but it backfired because none of us knew what the fuck he was talking about. Shoulda stuck with that "friend" of yours, Connor.

Also, how pathetic is it that Connor keeps trying to throw other people under the bus instead of doing the adult thing and trying to work on improving his life? If Connor wants us to praise him, literally all he has to do is get a job at the library. Baby steps and all that. Instead, he resorts to turning people in his life into sacrificial lambs in order to appease our "bloodlust."

I love the lolcow mindset---one that is especially evident in OPL---that DING DANG DIRTY TROLLS indiscriminately harass people, & will just move on to another victim if the cow offers one up. Although, in light of @Smutley's recent post, maybe "Emily" is this chick?

Thank god Connor came here to sperg about a girl that likes him, because he said the same thing on Wrong Planet. Much different reception there then here, though. (Why does he ressurect this thread 5 months after his last post though??)

Spoiler

View attachment 16414

If so, good job doxxing her just now, @Connor. You used her actual name & posted a picture after wanting to keep her "anonymous."

 

[harvey dirdban]

"I'm going to call her Jane Doe to protect her anonymity. And then post a picture of her."

 

[It's HK-47]

Yes, seeing someone who is usually very nice become very angry over someone's idiocy is an awesome sight.

“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle [wo]man.”

- Patrick Rothfuss, The Wise Man's Fear

 

[Handsome Pete]

I love the lolcow mindset---one that is especially evident in OPL---that DING DANG DIRTY TROLLS indiscriminately harass people, & will just move on to another victim if the cow offers one up. Although, in light of @Smutley's recent post, maybe "Emily" is this chick?


If so, good job doxxing her just now, @Connor. You used her actual name & posted a picture after wanting to keep her "anonymous."

First Molly in The Stand, now Jane Doe/Emily. Why do you keep stealing Conner's ladies, Gary Sinise?

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

Is it weird that I find "God" to be the most odd?

No, because that one actually struck me as the oddest one, too. Especially considering he'll work himself into a lather over anyone so much as suggesting they might be religious.

 

[RetardBus]

I saw people combining Connor's killer smile with other famous forum shooping subjects, and I couldn't resist making this gif.

Spoiler: Bohemian Autism

 

[applecat]

Dear @Smutley , is there any chance of you putting together a master list of your Wrong Planet posts? I think that would make a lot of new weens very happy.

 

[Yog-Spergoth]

Dear @Smutley , is there any chance of you putting together a master list of your Wrong Planet posts? I think that would make a lot of new weens very happy.

That's a really good idea. Or maybe like a "Best of..." list?

 

[The Knife's Husbando]

I saw people combining Connor's killer smile with other famous forum shooping subjects, and I couldn't resist making this gif.

Spoiler: Bohemian Autism

Internal thought: "'Bohemian Autism'? Dafuque is that?"

(Clicks spoiler tag.)

This is a thing of beauty and eternal joy.

 

[Smutley]

Dear @Smutley , is there any chance of you putting together a master list of your Wrong Planet posts? I think that would make a lot of new weens very happy.

Well! Isn't this a fantastic idea? Let me think of how to do it... maybe I'll finally have a use for the media section on the Farms.

 

[Dalish]

No, because that one actually struck me as the oddest one, too. Especially considering he'll work himself into a lather over anyone so much as suggesting they might be religious.

This is the weirdest part for me, as he got so upset when the 'good Christian men' of Duck Dynasty were rightfully reprimanded for their homophobic and racist remarks and has identified as 'pro life' in his Discus comments.

 

[Cosmos]

This is the weirdest part for me, as he got so upset when the 'good Christian men' of Duck Dynasty were rightfully reprimanded for their homophobic and racist remarks and has identified as 'pro life' in his Discus comments.

I think he actually said nominally pro-life or something, meaning that he'll gladly toss those unborn babies under the bus if there's a chance of them getting adopted. Adoption, in Connor's mind, is far worse than abortion (this is the opposite of pro-life people such as myself, who think that adoption is always the better alternative).

As for Connor's views on God and religion, I honestly think it depends on how he feels. In one of Smutley's latest roundups he says that he believes in God, but in others he balks at the notion of a higher power. I'm guessing he just goes with God or no God depending on how edgy he's feeling and if it means he gets to make fun of those brainless religious sheeple.

 

[Molly Ringwald]

Is it weird that I find "God" to be the most odd?

I saw "favorite actress of mine". I think it's time to flee to Alberta.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

You threaten my family, you're going to be in a world of pain.

Spoiler: now in technicolor

EDIT: colored version of this from twenty pages ago, for those catching up, & in response to this:

Let's break this down for people who aren't Fatty Ding Dongs:

• Asking for a plain cheeseburger, but getting it with lettuce and tomatoes, is basically a hate crime.
• Taking lettuce AND tomatoes off of a cheese burger is too much work for a young man of 19
• Connor receives shitty service from TWO awful waitresses while eating out with his evil violent abusive family in a single day
• Parents pushing you to better your life and not waste it all on flights of fancy = adult child abuse
• Even Connor's parents, the people who love him unconditionally, are fucking sick of him talking about writing but never actually doing it
• Connor thinks "I was conceived because my dad was cheating on his first wife with my mom." for no reason other than HE suspected his dad of cheating, not his mom
• He also thinks Anderson Cooper would want to display this sad tale of horror to the world.

Spoiler

View attachment 16160

 

[Cosmos]

Spoiler: now in technicolor

View attachment 16440
View attachment 16441
View attachment 16442

Thanks to your drawings, I've now retconned Connor's traumatic burger experience. In my version, he went out to lunch in full Klaus Krieger cosplay, which explains the waitress's attitude and his father's exasperation.

 

[Mauvman Shuffleboard]

None of us remember Emily because YOU HAVE LITERALLY NEVER MENTIONED HER UNTIL TODAY.
View attachment 16422
Kid, you can't even trollshield right.

He can't even trollshield right.

I'm guessing that he tried to pass it off as "lol, remember this chick?" instead of "Look at this new thing!!!" in an attempt to make the shielding less obvious, but it backfired because none of us knew what the fuck he was talking about. Shoulda stuck with that "friend" of yours, Connor.

Also, how pathetic is it that Connor keeps trying to throw other people under the bus instead of doing the adult thing and trying to work on improving his life? If Connor wants us to praise him, literally all he has to do is get a job at the library. Baby steps and all that. Instead, he resorts to turning people in his life into sacrificial lambs in order to appease our "bloodlust."

As fun as it is to assume Connor was bringing it up for the first time now and failed to trollshield, in this particular instance he was being truthful. He mentioned her in chat most of the times, but at one point he made a thread for her. The thread got merged with personal lolcows because that's all it really was.

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/personal-lolcows.463/page-35#post-185644

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/personal-lolcows.463/page-37#post-192118

 

[Cosmos]

Omg.

 

[Dilligaff]

I swear I've seen that picture of the girl with Gary Sinise before, but I can't figure out where. No results on tineye.com. Maybe ED?

Edit 2: searched around and there's a copy on MySpace, but that's as far as I got. And it is associated with the name Emily.