DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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SoapQueen1 said:
And we still don't really understand what exactly he was spending it all on.
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I feel like this will be the subject of speculation for decades to come. Unless "basic bills" is a codename for some doomsday device that DSP's building so he could destroy the detractors... or to fund his presidential run

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Near said:
I feel like this will be the subject of speculation for decades to come. Unless "basic bills" is a codename for some doomsday device that DSP's building so he could destroy the detractors... or to fund his presidential run

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President Burnell would run this country into the ground in well under eleven years.

Bonus, though, is that he'd also get the US ejected out of the United Nations after he called Antonio Guterres a fag.
 
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MundaneDave on Twitter

“Why would I want children? You are my children. GTG's laugh tho https://t.co/E5YdqqRugA”
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tzgnilki said:
he's severely congested and won't do anything about it, it's a sign of how dusty his house is and how little fresh air he gets
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I remember some video he did showing his workspace. He showed his console and tv setup and they were absolutely caked in dust. He said he never dusts them because “Man caves are supposed to be dusty.” And he wonders why he has post nasal drip.
 
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SoapQueen1 said:
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MundaneDave on Twitter

“Why would I want children? You are my children. GTG's laugh tho https://t.co/E5YdqqRugA”
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That's some good shit right there. All you are, Phil, is a giant cautionary tale with flabby chicken legs. Someone could stitch your mouth shut and hang a sign around your neck reading, "DONT DO THIS" and you'd serve the same purpose, and the world would be 0.0002 decibels quieter as a secondary benefit.

That guy's laugh is pretty great, too.
 
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THEKINGOFGOUTVLOGS said:
I'm more concerned about why he gives so much of a shit about what other streamers do enough for him to go on rants like these
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As others have said, he should care about it in terms of staying competitive.
If you bring up things like green screen, playing with fans, and muting the mic when you have to burp/snort/crush a bottle(?), he calls you and the creators in question kiddie morons and says that he is real and unique. He doesn't look at this successful dude and consider what the guy is doing better, he just screams that it's exactly like his own content. Phil. Video length and general channel premise do not make your commentary exactly the same. Especially not when you're lying about the video length - you posted 10 minute videos forever.

So, to summarize: "I am unique, don't follow trends and I'm successful because of that, but also I do exactly what these other successful creators are doing, and yet I'm not successful."
It takes a special kind of stupid hypocrite to not see the problem with that statement.
And that, Phil, right there, is why people troll you.

EDIT: The soundboard is brilliant. We need to get a real dense goat laugh on there. And the "Zzzhuuunnnzt" laugh from Kat's interruption. That never fails to kill me.
 
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THEKINGOFGOUTVLOGS said:
His reaction to having to do another companion quest says how much he enjoys The Outer Worlds enough for him to still have not finished it a long time ago

And some cuck dropped another 10 subs. Organic growth

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To be fair, the quest he's complaining about is now semi-notorious for how much of a grinding fetch chore it is and for its underwhelming payoff. He's also on the penultimate leg, where the narrative jabbing the player in the ribs about how tiresome this all must be starts to wear thin. It aggravated me and I played Skyrim with all of its meaningless radiant quest bullshit for 5000 hours like the good little autist I am.

Interestingly, the goal is to hook Parvati (the woman shown speaking) up with another NPC, so this is a rare instance in which I'm sure Phil feels comfortable being as the end result won't be digital sex with his player character. Kat just won't stand for that, apparently.
 
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actually said:
I see nocouture has showed up to drop 40 subs today to hit that sub goal. If it's not planetjeff as @Nigel of Ukip says, I'm quite curious who it is.
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I will never understand this.

If you have a streamer you like, just give him the 200dollars. Why would you let twitch take half?
BTW, just for coming up with the whole "gifted subs" idea, Twitch needs to go down one day. FUKIN DISGUSTING.
 
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LostMy1stAccount said:
I actually think that DSP watches Maximillian streams on the regular and tries to imitate him.
Only that DSP doesn't have the audience and/or the reach to be successful with things that Maximillian does.

If you watch the start of Max's playthrough of Death Stranding one can spot the same kind of "humor" that DSP always tries to do.
Also at the time when the Street Fighter Anniversary Edition came out, DSP copied Max's opinion almost word for word.
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actually said:
He also doesn't have the intelligence or charisma. Maximilian seems to be a genuinely likable person (with the understanding that that's an opinion). Phil is not.
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Another big difference is how they respond to negativity. Max will either address it, side-step it, or silence it; most of the time it's "let's not talk about that" but there have been times he's brought out the ban hammer on people. When he's in game and shit isn't working out, there are moments of "WTF, how do I dodge that?!" but he always tries to maintain a mindset of how to get around things. And he is nice, whether it's an act or not is up for debate (because everyone has haters), but he talks nice, he's married with no problem bringing her on stream or playing games with her, and also invites his friends over and have streams with all of them as well. He's not a paranoid shut-in like Phil; his entourage even go to EVO together, as a group. And even if you run into him out in the wild, he's a nice energetic guy... he's also taller than you might think on camera, dude is over 6 feet tall.

Phil on the other hand, wallows in negativity and is so easy to bait into rants. Whether it's in game or real life, nothing is ever his fault. He hides his wife away and the only thing people get is what she likes or what she's cooking. He goes outside of his house once a week; 52 days a year, and sees nothing wrong with it (good clip in the GTG video from this morning), and is scared shitless of any kind of social interaction because of the detractors. The one thing he tries to do that Max does is ham shit up. But it comes off as fake and forced with his knee-slaps and HAHAHAHAHAAHAH or "JASPER DID THAT!! JASPER DID THAT!" Yeah, we got it, calm down.

He's ten to twenty years too late to become a Max Dood. Project 7 shenanigans aside, if Phil stayed focused, dedicated, and maybe try different projects from time to time (and keep up with the fucking trends), he could've been a Max... hell he was on youtube and shit so long ago, it could've gone the way that Max is another Phil. And I'll use Max's Marvel 3 Assist Me as an example. Shit is corny as hell, lots of over-acting and hamming shit up, but it's entertaining enough and Max goes over things that the characters can do in game. It made him endearing and an entry point for a lot of people into the FGC. Yeah, a lot of the older guys see Max as a paid hype machine (which he is), but he's safe enough for people who may not know shit to get interested in it. He also has other videos to get people interested, I personally like his Boss Rage series; I don't need an introduction to most of the games he plays, but I enjoy watching people get the shit stomped out of them and then overcome the hurdle. He's also safe enough to get sponsorships and other shit, aside from doing honest work for companies on the side. I wrote myself into a corner here, but another thing he does is he doesn't show himself off as human. Max will have his dog, his wife, his friends on stream or out in the wild in real life. Phil used to do that, but won't, and the one time an expectation comes up where everyone would fucking demand he go outside (Panda's brother's wedding); he cucks out for Fallout 4 and being scared of detractors, and he couldn't even front her a ride to the airport and the cost of a ticket to get her ass out there for the wedding either. I'm being hyperbolic, but he's not fucking human.

I know I said it before in the above paragraph, but Phil's chance is gone. If there's one thing he is truthful about, it's that no one is willing to touch him. And when lightning does strike... shit... I can't remember the game. The "Worst game I ever played" review; he fucks off for a week to stay in a hotel. He can't even seize opportunities presented to him; while Max, yeah he's safe, and is a paid hype machine, he has no problem taking risks or trying new things.
 
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Pargon said:
President Burnell would run this country into the ground in well under eleven years.

Bonus, though, is that he'd also get the US ejected out of the United Nations after he called Antonio Guterres a fag.
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President Burnell visited Japan today and during the press conference, the reporter caught him whispering to Prime Minister Abe:

"Can you give me your countryman Hideo Kojima's number and teach me how to say FUCK YOU KOJIMA YOU COCKSUCKER in Japanese?"

Unfortunately for President Burnell, following this seemingly harmless question he had to embarrass himself by saying

"Oh the mic is on, the mic was on the whole time huh? Nuh-huh"
 
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