Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[The Nothingness]

they fly now!
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So the whole time Finn was in the First Order, he was not aware of this class of trooper? I guess since he was a janitor, he knew nothing.

 

[Optimus Prime]

On the subject of excellent Indian films, may I suggest the hidden gem that is Enrithan (a.k.a. simply 'robot')?

I mean, the easiest way to describe it is it's Terminator. Except instead of preventing the robot apocalypse (don't worry that still kinda happens in the best way possible), it's basically a romantic comedy musical complete with crazy dance numbers.

Apparently, it had a sequel last year that was the second highest grossing film in India and I need to track down a copy because I absolutely adore the first film.

 

[verissimus]

WHY THE FUCK THEY ACT LIKE JETPACKS JUST GOT INVENTED?!

Now that I think about it. This is being brought to us by the same guy who had Han Solo apparently only use Chewie's bowcaster in his final hurrah. ...we sure are in great hands are we?

Edit : ...oh ffs I also forgot. These dumbasses didn't even know the Force or Jedi even existed in the same movie. Fuck you JJ.

 

[XYZpdq]

The could use all the same actors and it would still be 10x better movie than Star Wars: The Revengening of The EU Plot Point We Stole.




Bahubali is just a joy to watch a pure joy. Fun. That's another word to use too. Not like SW and it's "please god let this end as they fucked up another thing for virtue signaling points."



Not like they don't have the bestest gosh darn tootin shooting light saberin' womp rat killin VATICAN ASSASSIN in Rey who could headbut them into the sarlac pits 100+ miles away. Seriously why does Kylo even bother trying to kill her with anything less than a tactical fusion bomb. General/Admiral/Commissar Pryde should tell Kylo "Look fuckwit, see these meteors? We are gonna put hyperspace drives on them and launch them into the same planet she is on. Every fucking thing in side this galaxy will die due to the gravitation wave. We'll get you a live feed and kill anything that comes out of the planet with droids manning ships. Fuck the metalheads they ain't human, who cares. Now go back to fucking room and let adults do all the things"

This in turn of course will be defeated by Rey as she has not figured out how to change both Space AND Time and ends up atomizing the planet while the Hyper RockePedoes goes through the planet unharmed. She then restores the planet and everyone back from an atomic state to their original mass,shape, and form and the proceeds to summon the Silver Surfer to announce her impeding death of all First Order troops through her new life partner Galacticus and will rule the galaxy unopposed for the next thousand+ years.

That's how Kevin Feige will bridge the SW and Marvel universe. Calling it now fer sure.

EDIT: Typos

I'd be okay with "And then Galactus ate all two dozen planets that make up a Galaxy Far Far Away, the end."

Now that I think about it. This is being brought to us by the same guy who had Han Solo apparently only use Chewie's bowcaster in his final hurrah. ...we sure are in great hands are we?

I thought there was something about only wookies (or similarly able to rip arms out of sockets strong fellows) using bowcasters.

 

[Gehenna]

I thought there was something about only wookies (or similarly able to rip arms out of sockets strong fellows) using bowcasters.

The EU has always been... inconsistent on that. Sometimes, bowcasters are strong enough to rip arms of the poor idiot who shoots it. Sometimes it just has a nice kick.
The 'canon' materials don't cover it at all, soooo....

 

[Uranus Pink]

On the subject of excellent Indian films, may I suggest the hidden gem that is Enrithan (a.k.a. simply 'robot')?

I mean, the easiest way to describe it is it's Terminator. Except instead of preventing the robot apocalypse (don't worry that still kinda happens in the best way possible), it's basically a romantic comedy musical complete with crazy dance numbers.

Apparently, it had a sequel last year that was the second highest grossing film in India and I need to track down a copy because I absolutely adore the first film.

Another clip to show how batshit insane the movie is.

 

[Creep3r]

I don't know where else to ask this, but since Rian Johnson is a topic, is Knives Out worth seeing? I don't mean is it bad or good, I mean is it political? Articles months ago say there's a very anti trump tone to it. I don't feel like being lectured to if that's the case.

No idea. Supposedly Rian claims that there is a jab at Star Wars fans in the film. Might not count as political normally, but since being a Disney hater automatically makes you a Nazi or a Russian-Bot, it might as well be a political jab.

https://www.cbr.com/star-wars-every-disney-change-made-to-a-new-hope/

This is interesting fodder for the debate on exactly how the OT works in Disney's purchase of Lucasfilm:

Now it comes out that when color-correcting lightsabers, "Disney added a fine sparkly mist when they clash..."

What's interesting is this article gives Lucas full credit for "Maclunkey" and claims Disney did everything else, like color-correcting, restoring logos, and what I just mentioned.

Granted, this could be poor reporting, but it's interesting nonetheless. I haven't seen this "fine mist" myself yet, but it's a bizarre concept. Note also that the article says Disney "respected every one of George Lucas' wishes." Huh.

And in the end Disney proves idiots like HelloGreedo wrong by doing the exact same shit they hated George for, and unsurprisingly, HelloGreedo refuses to make a video on Disney's edits despite making vids dedicated to every single little edit George made. He even refuses to acknowledge Greedo's line change despite Disney putting the blame on George for that one. Tards like him boasted how Disney would finally release the unedited OT, yet they have yet to deliver and done the exact opposite while their devotees like HelloGreedo don't even bother to acknowledge how much worse shit is, instead shilling endlessly without remorse or shame without admitting how wrong they were. Only publishing more clickbait bullcrap.

Then again I wouldn't be surprised if HelloGreedo is in good with Lucasfilm/Disney considering that he's getting to do interviews with people on the inside and even devs. A true blue fucking sellout and hypocrite.

And speaking of the edits, people are talking about the edits made to ANH, but what about ROTJ? Does it have any new edits? Like new dialogue recorded by Anthony Daniels telling the Ewoks about Ahsoka and Aladdin instead of Luke and Vader?

So the whole time Finn was in the First Order, he was not aware of this class of trooper? I guess since he was a janitor, he knew nothing.

I was about to mention that too. Like the guy was enslaved and indoctrinated in the FO since childhood (despite never acting like it) yet he never even got to see that they owned jetpacks? They retconned Finn to be a janitor all his life and he claims he scrubbed every corner of every facility he's been in, yet he never noticed a couple of jetpacks lying around in the armory or troopers training with them? And why recruit slave children for janitorial work when fucking Mouse Droids and maintenance droids can do that faster and without wasting as much man power and resources? And why would you even send out a janitor who's never seen action before or even held a gun to take part in raiding a village? They could've used Finn's status as an ex-FO trooper as some kind of key to beating the FO, like maybe he knows enough about their battle tactics, weapons, hideouts, ships, or just about anything he's heard or seen over the years that he could share with the not-Rebels. There's been so many great ex-stormtrooper stories for decades before Disney came along yet out of all the stuff they stole from the EU, they couldn't steal one decent ex-trooper story? Instead they fucking steal the plots and concepts of Dark Empire, the Jedi Academy Trilogy and The Jedi Prince series, three of the most divisive pieces of SW media out there before the prequels and Disney came along and they take the most divisive and hated parts of those three and make them into awful movies and spinoffs that are even more divisive? How do you even do that?!

Edit:

Imagine how funny a sequel to Spaceballs could be.

Well we did get a Spaceballs animated series on G4 back in the 2000s, sadly it wasn't that good. It had some good bits and fun parodies but the animation was awful, jokes could be flat at times, some plots were really lame or inconsistent and they removed Colonel Sanders for some reason.

 

[Optimus Prime]

Another clip to show how batshit insane the movie is.

Yeah I intentionally didn't link that because that's honestly the best part of the whole film, when more cops than a Payday 2 mission on Death Wish get laid out by a a robot army ignoring physics harder than the Matrix.

Then again, the part where he basically demands a mosquito appologize to his creator's girlfriend for biting her and succeeds...yeah, this film is absolutely insane, nothing makes sense, the robot is hillariously OP, and you people need to see it right the fuck now.

 

[verissimus]

Oh wait...they (or rather KK) did actually forget about jetpacks after all KK did say this

"Every one of these movies is a particularly hard nut to crack. There’s no source material. We don’t have comic books. We don’t have 800-page novels. We don’t have anything other than passionate storytellers who get together and talk about what the next iteration might be.”

She is just like Benioff & Weiss but even worse

 

[Jaimas]

I've always had a weakness for Studio Ninja and Wakaliwood myself.

 

[Optimus Prime]

Oh wait...they (or rather KK) did actually forget about jetpacks after all KK did say this

"Every one of these movies is a particularly hard nut to crack. There’s no source material. We don’t have comic books. We don’t have 800-page novels. We don’t have anything other than passionate storytellers who get together and talk about what the next iteration might be.”

She is just like Benioff & Weiss but even worse

There's literally a part in the climax of the first Thrawn book where six space troopers pop out of some mole machines and start flying around and causing shitloads of trouble. With jetpacks, of course.

I mean, it's like Disney just can't catch a break (not that the mouse deserves one iota at this point), because if this was supposed to kickstart the hype machine, it managed to do the complete opposite by just poking holes in the swiss cheese that is the plot consistency.

 

[Gehenna]

There's literally a part in the climax of the first Thrawn book where six space troopers pop out of some mole machines and start flying around and causing shitloads of trouble. With jetpacks, of course.

I mean, it's like Disney just can't catch a break (not that the mouse deserves one iota at this point), because if this was supposed to kickstart the hype machine, it managed to do the complete opposite by just poking holes in the swiss cheese that is the plot consistency.

To be fair to the mouse... this clusterfuck wasn't reeeeally their fault. Bob Igor wanted the must generic, cookie cutter shit that fans would enjoy to recoup his paying too much for the Star Wars brand. It is entirely on kennedy for just... stabbing everyone in the back.

 

[Reverend]

Oh wait...they (or rather KK) did actually forget about jetpacks after all KK did say this

"Every one of these movies is a particularly hard nut to crack. There’s no source material. We don’t have comic books. We don’t have 800-page novels. We don’t have anything other than passionate storytellers who get together and talk about what the next iteration might be.”

She is just like Benioff & Weiss but even worse

We can only thank our lucky stars we didn't get Dufus and Dumbass to direct star wars they would've turned it into a wookified version of Cats because we sure as shit know those two assclowns don't give a flying fucknugget for the source material.

 

[Adamska]

Shit man, those Bahubali movies look amazingly fun to watch; I unironically now want to go enjoy some of them now... will definitely get some dvd or blu-ray for it if possible.

WHY THE FUCK THEY ACT LIKE JETPACKS JUST GOT INVENTED?!

Desperate marketing from a furiously sweating JarJar or Rat. Can't really tell which anymore since they're both panicking quite hard at how fucked the production has been..

 

[Gehenna]

Shit man, those Bahubali movies look amazingly fun to watch; I unironically now want to go enjoy some of them now... will definitely get some dvd or blu-ray for it if possible.

Those IMMEDIATELY got added to my movie night.

 

[Jaimas]

So recently, an honest-to-god script got leaked onto Ebay because one of the actors, in their infinite wisdom, left it in their hotel room.

There’s been a great disturbance in the force.

The highly-anticipated “Star Wars: The Rise Of Skywalker” film was nearly spoiled terribly after an actor’s sloppy actions resulted in the script being uploaded on eBay, director J.J. Abrams said.

The cinematic calamity occurred when one of the space opera’s stars absent-mindedly left the script unattended in their hotel, the Los Angeles Times reported.

Abrams said the actor “left it [the script] under their bed and it was found by someone who was cleaning their room.” He added that it “was given to someone else — who then went to sell it on eBay.”

Abrams won’t mention the party responsible for the leak, although it’s suspected that they had to be a top star — i.e. Adam Driver or Daisy Ridley — because supporting actors weren’t provided scripts, according to Entertainment Weekly.

Fortunately, Disney was able to divert disaster a la Princess Leia intercepting the plans to the Death Star. A quick-thinking staffer identified the script on the online auction site, and bought it before it could be sold to someone else — and likely disseminated across the web.

The spillage was especially infuriating considering how stringent Disney has been about guarding plot details.

“They were really nervous about anything getting out,” Abrams told Good Morning America Monday. “So they had only a handful of scripts, and they were printed on crazy, uncopy-able paper.”

“The Rise of Skywalker” hits theaters Dec. 20.

 

[verissimus]

"Fortunately, Disney was able to divert disaster a la Princess Leia intercepting the plans to the Death Star. A quick-thinking staffer identified the script on the online auction site, and bought it before it could be sold to someone else — and likely disseminated across the web. "

And I thought you guys puns can be cringe worthy regarding certain news articles.

 

[Uranus Pink]

So how long after the check clears, the now scanned script still gets leaked online by someone else in possession of it?

 

[Thank Fuck For Evil Otto]

On the subject of excellent Indian films, may I suggest the hidden gem that is Enrithan (a.k.a. simply 'robot')?

I mean, the easiest way to describe it is it's Terminator. Except instead of preventing the robot apocalypse (don't worry that still kinda happens in the best way possible), it's basically a romantic comedy musical complete with crazy dance numbers.

Apparently, it had a sequel last year that was the second highest grossing film in India and I need to track down a copy because I absolutely adore the first film.

The robot bird swarm scenes in the 2nd are fun. I love that bird. The story is just as dumb as the first, but its still a blast. The fight scenes are even crazier, and theres a sort of naive jubilence afforded at seeing the corny hero prevail.

At least in the US, Robot 2.0 has been on Amazon Prime Video for months.

 

[Optimus Prime]

The robot bird swarm scenes in the 2nd are fun. I love that bird. The story is just as dumb as the first, but its still a blast. The fight scenes are even crazier, and theres a sort of naive jubilence afforded at seeing the corny hero prevail.

At least in the US, Robot 2.0 has been on Amazon Prime Video for months.

...ITS ON FUCKING AMAZON?

HOT DAMN! I know what I'm watching this Thanksgiving weekend!